 Make sure you go copy merchandise at www.donflop.com forward slash shop and also follow the Twitter and Facebook which is below On the right hand side, an absolute legend in Don Flop, I'd say so myself Make a bit of noise for Ogreos Left hand side, one half of the two on two current title champions Make a bit of noise for Marlowe There's no flip involved in this battle Marlowe decided he wanted to go first so it's round one on Marlowe Are you ready? So it's Marlowe versus Ogreos Obviously That's the match we're commencing with Riggs just introduced us What's it like to be bald? Does the look shine through? Look at me Ivan I don't want to say goodbye too, I hate my barber Some days I just think I'll take the plunge you know Put this crap to an end Grab the clipper and go berserk like Tony Montana and his friend I have moments when I think to myself how bad can it get? Then I look at you and I think fucking hell What do you think I should do with my hair man? Because it's like the doctor always said when the follicles are dead the follicles are dead Well of course I went to see a trichologist instead Now suddenly anything is possible with meds The godliest of threads would be dropping to my neck Was I a blonde or a brunette? He started promising me dreads It was some miracle cure but like how costly could it get? He said that would be three hundred and seventy six dollars for the set I said dollars he said yes Now I'm three hundred pounds out of pocket in a den Probably just stress What? It was bonding with my friend Ogreos You're alright Bold pride Probably if I finally have more hair than my opponent That's the chemo's fault Bold Because your head looks like a phrenology head on a philosopher's shelf rack If that hairless ceiling could share its feelings it would sing an Adele track You get sentimental VO5 gel pack You smell that Michael Stipe from REM called He wants himself back I knew it was you from the way he told me Didn't even name you homie Just send me a skull face emoji Then the tree emoji Then the peace emoji Then the tea emoji Then the soup emoji Then the pee emoji I said oh can you please Stop sending me emojis What are you doing? You've got a new opponent mate I said okay great He said no no wait Then the praying emoji Some more nature emojis I said Jesus choice What are you saying here homie I said letter S I said right He said yeah do you want to battle him I said um fine When's it happening Then he sent me the calendar emoji time Don't worry about going bald It's just one of those things It's funny you're into molties And now you're molting I've never seen hair whisperer If your hair could talk If your hair could talk It would be a whisperer If it couldn't It'd be a good listener If it could sing It would be Christopher Marlon not Christopher He's from Reading In Reading Shire Or wherever Shire All I know is he left the shire Like a hobbit on a quest to find a better life And ended up in my neck of the woods And messed the fiber You could be Dressed in finer And I would still hate you with every fiber Trendy biker Gentrifier Reason that my rent is higher You exemplify the type of guy to Wip the sight of a resting spider Then tell him he's best to hire your recommended web designer I don't care about your new splendid diner Or the specs of your expensive cider Don't try and justify your means Just cause you think the ends are nicer I ain't angry It's no problem I'll move from happening To Tottenham By the time you get to Tottenham I'll be in Scotland As I see the effing signs on road Like what's sold by Foxton's It's a little London joke, I know But we should all get to running I'm John Snow telling everybody winter's coming The white walker's arrival They'll be at the wall by night The hillster's rising from the dead Cause they think it's quite cool It's a retro revival Nothing sacred to these zombies Everything's got to be viral They pop up in pop-ups with their pop-up cycles Natasha It's the Og monster I'm real They know what Oggy on You prepped for this battle by putting the office on And then show up In a style you copied from your favourite character This is the comic con Cause you and Adam all about the plagiarism Shuffle Tea got a blatant business Selling anything from two rhymes to a page of written And you play the system You get mates' rates for the same assistance It's a grave addiction Cause you keep needing a bigger dose You got this pillard running from pillar to post Cause you can't live with your own shit that you wrote But don't want to die so won't give up the ghost Before a single line's served You gotta meet Adam so he can go through his mind first These are the things I've heard and I'm a vegan So I don't mix my words It's a one-on-one So I'm facing a pair still I don't care if my fruit's survivalist A pair of grills A ramble In the woods It's a rare skill You could have seven shuffles Still wouldn't be a fair deal Two-on-two champs What do you mean? That's just a fiction I swear you're the only specialist doubles team in existence They don't guys that go laser quest Go laser quest And take their own equipment And shout Top Gun After every nine-year-old victim It's like when I make up prizes For those kids that otherwise wouldn't win them Like medal for most improved at wearing capsules And remembering to bring them There's different lines in this game Doubles ain't the same thing buddy It's the poor relation You Jamie Murray Bringing shame to Mummy Cos he got no hard boss And just do what you do And make it funny let's go Question What do you mean European teacher? You England mate I was in a tour surprised by this whole election in the States Forget President Trump This guy's teaching year sevens to ram What's he coaching them on sprinting days? Slow and steady wins the race Don't forget to finish eighth The dash lasts for over a month He loves cross country Cos that's slower than fuck Come to think of it You are closer to Trump Cos you only like certain races And I thought it was a joke that you run Every kid in your class gets athletes fur It feels like Washing four bars from you Faulty the punchline sounds shit And just a little bit too long And you know it's true Or the manic depressive When you talk to me I pretend you're being passive aggressive Marlowe is so blessed to see you man I twitching out his socket like it's badly infected While he's reaching for a shang To start stabbing my leg with I said this Hey Ogmios Would you like some of this cranberry beverage? No thank you Marlowe I don't like juice Anti-selectic I was convinced he's got a secret to hide Like he's way too cool headed And peaceful at times The only dirt on him that's easy to find Is from the trees that he climbs Hey everyone You should give being vegan a try Meditation will lead you to the meaning of life And his wife Leave the soft guy act Ooh love the planet Be zen I do not buy that He smashed the window of a whole foods For having the wrong chai brand And he choked his housemate to death When he found his gong chai smashed You ask your girl a simple question And it leaves her with a gulp She wouldn't let you cock her So you beat her to a pulp Inside events Ogmios Mystical I believe in your cold Get home Ivan Hackney I did three for an assault Despite what I said It's blessed that you're settled So Found yourself a nice Polish girlfriend She your cherished rose Or she about to get to know The dark side of her fellow soul Cause in that Brexit vote You went for yes to go You came what you said at home So now your girl might leave you That's a different type of exit Alien trying to lift your consciousness But you ain't ready bro He meets and they like him Be in a shop send him home You hate me cause I was raised up In a separate zone I came from a state of zen And you a xenophobe Some thought I couldn't handle this They don't have a clue though They have average wit Some said I couldn't handle this They don't have a clue though They have average wit There's a body on the car Then his man is it It was Oggy in the study With a candlestick With a candlestick Throwing light on my manuscript Where I planned all this But you prints don't stay on page You the gatekeeper I break the cage You don't see the work That paved the way cause I'm low Key leaving earth This is a great escape You studied film So let me say it differently I'm still alone In goal Save the imagery Cause just to show you You won't be taking liberties I'm too sly for your pen I escape to victory Too sly for your pen Let them ponder Ridiculous punchline With a few words I make triple entendres You struggled to say one thing With a hundred I came to cremate this tomb And let the fragrant fumes Pervade the room And for those that didn't make it through They can pay in soon What your pen gets smoked On vapor view It's the way of the chosen few I write an oprah sitting on a throne of Zeus Ugly the Celtic god of golden truth Invoked through the focal tubes Unbroken every mind I've spoken to Ugly got a fire unfolken to In the pantheon of gods I am the go-to I am pan, a god and a go-to It pipes up It's the coldest tune Haunting melodies The tones of doom Like the devil himself Was phoning you Do-do-do-do Hello? Shuffle who? He's for tea Best bro, couple schemes, couple schemes Yes, dude, good man Ah yes, better We've been phoning you Oh, you up there He says He won't expose you in battles If you fucking pay him his bread Yo, it's good to talk, G Still your phone, I did, bro, have you called me? You're recognized or real I'm not, bro, I'm breaking fifth and sixth years, bro Yeah, seven fools Yes, I am aware that this is not all rhyming No, that's tyring We all got a fucking special book Fucking endless, Mr. Rhymes Yeah, you could give it a try But if you're assisting fine Oh, thanks, yeah, I'm a terrific guy Oh, yeah, that's a nifty rhyme Yeah, you've got twines, fixing nice Yeah, yeah, that's good one to you Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah Yeah Yeah Yeah Oh, is this the time? Six, nine, six, nine, eight, good one Ticket test, yeah, run it, run it Run it, run it, run it I'm opening it, bro Okay, we'll do it, bye He said bye So, yeah, shuffle, what's greasy He did, yeah, he stole the phone thing He fucked it completely So what's the thing with you, Og? You're mystical Walking round all sentient Thinking you're mystical Modern day society Modern day society, rang You mystical You a bitch with your gangly arms Mystical I heard something very interesting About your trip to America Just before you get complacent I had to corroborate the story Check some statements You were all at a diner Giving your orders to gender waitress And you said, I'm vegan So give me the salad Sausage, eggs and bacon In flames, I call this section about Meatcake in America Steak and cheesecake Was the whole week just one long motherfucking cheat day? With these grades What would he say? I'll tell you what he'd say He'd say you sold out Turned to the ways of a predator Og went sightseeing out of butchers Rolled around in the steak like a wrestler The others were like, well that's pretty strange and irregular I guess what happens in America Stands in America I saw exclusive footage from his hotel suite You two get too far And we really got too far I saw exclusive footage from his hotel suite You two get too far And we really got to see what kind of human you are He was bathing in pigs mud Shooing a heart Laughing hysterically Or sucking on a Cuban cigar You truly are A deplorable piece of shit Type to act like he wasn't even meaning it Gets halfway through eating ribs like Oh no It's the, it's the bones I can't get away I can't just not finish my dinner play It's some waste He's like This carrot tastes a little straight Ah It's a steak Big mistake So it's Og Meos The mystical God Meos That making all his little students jog Meos That cul-de-sacres the year 10's Pogs Meos That doesn't blog Meos But if he blogged Meos He should definitely call his blog blog Meos That doesn't like the way they treat those cats and dogs Meos That campaigning for his very, that campaigning for the rights of those dogs Meos That owns his very own cuddly fucking little fucking dog Meos Then goes to self-career and gives those dogs a scoff Meos That hides a mist in the dog Meos As well as your kids into the woods with a chocolate box That pretends to be peaceful and don't flop Meos And gets home pistol whips his lady with a Glock Meos I mean Cops Meos Cops Meos There's no actual proof from witnesses or cops Meos But so what Meos It's gonna stop Meos We're gonna get this bloody menace off the block Meos And from your head to your motherfucking socks Meos You really fucking stink, you need a wash Meos I'm literally freestyling now, this is off the top Meos I'm gonna stop Meos, this is a flop Meos Really weird way of ending that round See ya, guys, see ya, time Yo, yo, shut, shut Man, I'm sorry to call right back Yo, are you cool? Did Marlon call? No, no, right Just wanted to hear it right now Right in twat So you've gone against a train of A fizzy drink A biscuit A drink A pee When will you And the myriad things of this world live in peace Be like me Take it easy I walk through the forest and bless everything I see The plants and seas, rocks, pedal, and of course the trees Oh The birds are light on branches Just a greeting that comes safe Francis of the sea sea Sea sea The difference You want props but lack the wisdom You battle objects I battle with them In this game I call the shots This is king ballon orthodox Stick in your quarter box Get in my way, I'm calling obs Remember that phantom guy That you battle back in time part of the team Just a fucking man and a stick, right? You thought they had them nice But got battered life And you saw the anger rise And you took the gas out of a phantom And he got flat inside Well, phantom died This was phantom life Well, I couldn't find a phantom life So I wrote life on the phantom side You can call phantom size But I'm not the one that took phantom's life You're a callous kind of parasite He was just a kid, that's infanticide But there's karmic law For that flagrant crime You wish you could go back to that bar And change that night But you can't have raised that time You pulled the tab So now it's payback time Because you remember stick From phantom stick, that team you battle, right? Little stick used to roll with this whole phantom Not phantom life, just phantom, right? And then you and Shof got mad There was a savage fight on that tragic night And you slapped the guy Well, stick must have died What? Let me out, let me out You left me leaking sap My arms, neck and knees hurting You snapped me so bad I had to see a tree surgeon Put me back together This is me but the beast version This is nature verse man And you Steve Owen You killed my cousin So war is my chosen path I'm no olive branch I'm a blow gun dog A poison arrow through a broken heart Every focus bar I wrote was carved Until my flesh and until my soul was scarred I got the coldest bark Like that doberman in my local park My dogs got me back like I was thrown afar You didn't know twigs could be so advanced But this is the oldest craft And I sit on their shoulders in my totem stars Let the soldiers dance You'll see an animal come out of the stick Like Moses star This is voodoo shit So shut your gob This stick will stick it to the man Like fuck your job Captains look One, two, six, three, four, seven, two, eight I located and killed this cretin today What are you staring at? My luxurious hair and that I ain't gonna spare this twat My ears are drawn on, I ain't hearing that Death to this punk I'm like you but on fire I'm your effigy son Even in death you won't get to me I keep his zen as it heats up Like a Vietnamese monk Looking to the flame I'll make you wish you were never born How's your head feeling now? Pretty warm