 I can totally see you staring at me. Good morning, my beautiful internet friends. Welcome back. Today we're gonna talk about the topic of staring, but I'm gonna take a little bit of a different angle on this than I have before, because a lot of people talk about, and I've talked about how uncomfortable it is to be looked at in public, because I can't go anywhere without people staring at me. That sounds very narcissistic. It's because I'm missing a leg. And there's a lot of vulnerability in that, but something came to my attention not that long ago that kind of made me start thinking about this a little bit differently. So I wanted to tackle that. First of all, don't worry. This is not gonna be an angry rant or anything like that, but I did want to address this subject. There is this phrase that has stuck in my head for, honestly, months. In a video a while ago, I talked about how being stared at was kind of challenging for me sometimes. And someone said in the comment section, Joe, some people stare because they care. Just cemented itself in my head for a really long time. It actually kind of helped me deal with the way that people perceive me in public sometimes. If you follow me on Instagram, you'll see that I released this shirt a couple of days ago that says I can see you staring at me in big black letters. I was at the mall a couple months ago and it was a day where like, man, that the place was packed and I swear every person around me was just like a gaping at me with like a wide mouth, like they'd never seen a person missing a limb before. And I was kind of in a lighthearted mood that day. And I turned to Brian and I was like, I wish I could just like hold up a giant sign saying like, hey, I can see you staring at me. So I made a shirt saying it instead. And I released it on social media and I was amazed by the response. How many people said like, oh my God, I feel this so much. Like it's so uncomfortable. I hate how people look at me in public because they're dealing with some kind of disability or some kind of physical difference or whatever it is. And it's a weird subject for me to address, having found both sides of this coin because for most of my life, I looked normal, gonna use normal in quotes here, kind of fit into society's version of like an average human. And so I wasn't anything that stood out. I wasn't anything that people spent time staring at. I could choose to be invisible, which was great. I now miss that privilege. I have presently lost the ability to go out in public and not be noticed. And with that comes the sense of like insecurity. People stare at you and think like, what's wrong with me? You know, we're herd animals. We need other people. We desire a connection. And when everyone's looking at you like you're weird, like you're different. It's very isolating. For me, it can also feel kind of vulnerable when a lot of people notice me. I don't like being noticed all the time. I kind of deal with some safety issues in my mind and I'd rather kind of go around unnoticed sometimes. And so now I can. Now if I go out in public, I am noticed. People remember me because I'm missing a leg. And for a long time, that was difficult for me to deal with, right? Like I avoided going in public because I didn't want to deal with everyone's eyes on me. I felt like I had to like dress up every single day I left the house because people were gonna be looking at me. Like I used to be the girl who would wear like sweatpants and a T-shirt everywhere. And I was like, I can't do that anymore. I have to look nice. I have to have my hair done because people are gonna be staring at me. It took me months to work out of that mindset. And the thing is, I used to be on the other side of that equation. I have absolutely stared at people who did not look like society's definition of normal. And now I realize what that felt like. But I don't know that there is a super easy solution to this problem. And I made this shirt honestly more as like an empowering joke to myself and others because I'm not gonna lie. It's kind of fun to see someone like staring at you and then like notice your shirt and then like be like, you know, weird about it. It's just maybe it's a sick joke it's kind of funny to me. But here's the problem guys. A lot of people make videos or speeches about how we shouldn't stare at people who are different or don't look like us or whatever. But it's literally human nature. It's in our DNA to notice things that are outside the norm, slightly different. Kids are the most curious creatures around. They point and they stare at anything they haven't seen before. They wanna know what it is. They wanna understand it. And adults are just grown up kids. We still have that curiosity. We still have that urge to like look and see what it is. And I get that. I totally understand that. And so there have been days where I've been like super mad at people staring at me because I'm like, God, I just wanna live my life. Like I just wanna go get a fricking cup of coffee. Can you please not notice me? And I just go incognito, but I can't. You know, and it's super frustrating but on the flip side of it, it's kind of hard to fault people. It's kind of hard to get mad at them. Except the people who like stare for like 12 seconds with their mouth wide open. That's kind of like a little too far. I feel like I can get a little frustrated at that. The people who are like, that just seemed a little odd. But anyway, I am welcoming anybody and everybody to disagree with me on this. But I don't think that telling people not to stare at people who are different or rather not to look at them is really the answer here. I should have probably thought of an answer before I started this video. I look at people who don't look like me because I'm interested, because I'm fascinated. I don't stare to make them uncomfortable but I do notice them. And I think something I've realized being on this side of the coin too is that I can also tell when people are purposefully not looking at you or purposefully not trying to think about it. Because they're like, that's not socially acceptable. I shouldn't do that, but they do have questions but they do want to know something. And I'd be more than happy to answer it if they would speak up and I invite questions. So I think the topic of people who look different than you, like how should you respond is not necessarily a super easy one. Cause again, the normal answer is like, don't stare, don't look. Oh, but that's just not human nature. Like that literally fights against our instincts. And so I'm not sure, I'm not sure what the answer is. I can tell you that it makes me feel vulnerable and uncomfortable when everybody in a room is looking at me and is like glancing at me. But it's also hard to get mad at them because I know that they're just interested. I know they're fascinated. I know that I look different than they do and they want to know why. They want to know what it is. They might want to know my story. They might have questions and that's okay. So I guess maybe what I'm encouraging is that curiosity is awesome. Curiosity is a good thing but let's maybe curb our curiosity and not prolong our stares because that does start to hurt people. And while we're talking about staring, let me introduce you to our sponsor for the day, Peaks Clothing Blue Light Blocking Glasses. You guys know I get headaches, I get migraines and I'm working a number of jobs now that all involve looking at the screen like all day long. And screens have a lot of blue light and apparently that can actually interact and give you headaches. So before I filmed this video, I have actually worn these during my work day for a week now. And I'll be honest with you, I thought it kind of sounded like Poke Science blocking blue light. Like what's that gonna do? I can actually feel my eyes relax a little bit when I put these on. Just a little bit. I feel like there's tension that releases itself. And what these actually do is they block blue violet light which can be harmful to your eyes and we have it coming through our screens, our tablets, our computers, literally all day long. I have continued to wear these whenever I'm working at the computer and I really like them. Also, I kind of feel like they're cute. They're fun. They've got a couple different styles. I'm gonna link them down below and I would super recommend checking them out because they're also really affordable. I've looked into blue light blocking glasses before and oftentimes they're like 50 or 100 bucks and I don't have that kind of money to spend. And so this company, it's a lot less than that. You can find them on Amazon and they're actually based here in my city. So I was super happy to find them and work with them. And I would honestly recommend this if you guys have issues with headaches or eye strain or work at a desk all day long starting at a computer. So if you wanna try them out, I'm gonna leave a link in the description. There are four different styles currently. They've been an awesome company to work with and I super appreciate them sponsoring this video. So as long as we're talking about staring, maybe get yourself some cute glasses to a not stare or stare at people with. I'm not gonna tell you what to do. So what do you guys think about staring? Maybe I'm not being the best advocate for disability or anything like that when I suggest that people don't not look. But I get that it's hard not to look at people who look different than you. But the caveat is don't stare too long. And if you have a question, maybe just ask if it's okay to ask the question instead of awkwardly continuing to look at them because that is super uncomfortable. So let me know what your thoughts are on this subject. Should people just get over their curiosity, force themselves not to look at people who look different and go about their lives or not? Let me know what you think. I'm interested to hear your thoughts down below. A huge thank you to all of my patrons. We are almost at the second goal where I'll host two live streams a month that are scheduled in advance so you can make it. So thank you guys so much for being a part of my Patreon team. A big thanks goes to our patron of the day today who is Natalie Davis. Natalie, thank you so much for your help and your support. It truly means a lot to me. Thank you. If you enjoyed this video, I would love it if you would hit like and then subscribe to this channel that would mean a lot to me. And I would love to hear your voice in the comment section and see you back here in the next video. Thanks for listening guys. I love you. I'm thinking of you and I will see you in the next video. Bye. And her from the sky.