 What is up you guys got a little bit of a different format decided to film myself in the car a little bit I had a very interesting topic That one of my students brought up to me And he said Lloyd Why is it that men have to get rejected so much more than women do? And I thought about that for a little bit because it's a question that I used to fucking have when I was younger You know like it sucks dude you go out you talk to but hey, how's it going? And you know I have a boyfriend, you know, I need to see my friends like see you like you get a lot of rejection Men get rejected way more than women do when it comes to romantic situations for sure I think in general men get just rejected more in life. I don't know if you can prove me wrong in this area Take a look at how the things usually go down guys asking for the phone number guys asking the girl out He's trying to make plans though. It's the woman's position to either say yes or no That's her story And so a lot of guys when they hear this they get frustrated they think oh well It's not fair like why do women get to have all the power? Well first of all if you think they have all the power just because they're not getting rejected as much as us You're sorely mistaken Women have power, but men We are pushing ourselves that that is your job as a man if you're doing your job You should be pushing yourself if you never get rejected in life. You're not maximizing your potential Anyone who has started a business anyone who has tried to do something or accomplish a goal you get rejected When I first started jiu-jitsu I was getting tapped out by everyone man. I was failing Constantly now when I walk into the gym the same people that I was rolling with one of the same people but like new people come in I'm tapping out most of the people there now But it didn't happen that way at the beginning and you have to try you have to fail And that's how you learn and that's how you better yourself And if you continue to live in a space or live in an environment where you're not doing that Then you're just not maximizing your potential and this is a pretty important line that I I think I read this in the rational male And that's which is a freaking awesome book yet. I think the rational male should be mandatory reading for all men and that's Rejection is better than regret if you've been in life and You walk around you've been rejected a lot It's a lot better than living with someone who regrets not taking the opportunities that were presented to them Regrets being in that relationship for that long that regrets not doing not talking to that person that they really liked And then you've probably had this dude You probably had the situation where some girl in your class or maybe there was some girl that you saw in the street or whatever She was really interested in you. She's make an eye contact with you. She's following you around and you did nothing You probably went home and you're probably super pissed off at yourself. I've had those situations so many times Regret is worse than rejection to illustrate this point even further I'm gonna tell you a couple stories the first story that I'm gonna tell you It's a story about when I was when I was younger. I had a girl do this is actually like when I was real young I think I was a freshman in high school First there was this girl her name was uh, I think her name was Desiree She was kind of interested in me and she really liked me There was like a few like a month period where she was really freaking into me And I was not a popular kid I was hanging around with kind of the nerdy guys and I did this performance for the talent show and just afterwards Everyone was like wanted to talk to me everybody was interested in me And she was really interested in me, too And I remember she would come and talk to me at lunch every single day And she would call me on call me up on the phone every single day, too We talked for like an hour or something About freaking nothing man I was just happy to talk to a hot girl and I had no idea she was interested me and I did nothing and then I later Found out a couple years later that she was actually that she really liked me She had a huge crush on me and Ever since I found that out I was like god damn it like of course I would have gone with her like she was so fucking fine, dude So obviously there was a lot of regret in that position second story I Was out I think I was a junior in high school when this happened and I had a huge crush on this girl This redhead in my class We'll just call her D So D sits like right across from me and I would just we sat together in Spanish class And I would just stare at her face the whole time. I was like super in love with this girl That was back when I was like a butt super like hopeless romantic, right and I remember I was like this yet as carefree attitude. She was like, you know Very independent and I was very into that. I thought she was so hot So eventually I worked up enough courage to ask her out to junior prom and miraculously she said yes miraculously she said yes and We went to junior prom and I was so nervous the whole time I remember I was like trying to be myself trying to act like confident And I just I was so nervous and it was so obvious that she just saw me as a friend And I tried to kiss her at the end and she just kind of like patted me on the back and just like left And I later found out that she started dating this like 25 year old guy And the way I found out was I had made her a mixtape and I went to her place after that. It was like a week later I went to her place a week later, and I brought her this mixtape and she the whole time She was just like complaining about this other guy, and I was just like sitting there listening to her like a total little bitch and So this happened now fast-forward ten years later I Just come back from traveling and she hits me up out of nowhere. I had a freaking nowhere And so we start talking for a little bit We eventually go out for drinks and I remember her showing up and she did not look like the same girl that I remember her You know when she was when she was 16, I think she was 16 or 17 When she was at that age man, she looked good. She was like she had an awesome body She was still the same independent carefree attitude and at that time that was really appealing that was like rebellious because she was Not conforming to what people were doing in school, but now it just seemed like she had no direction in life She didn't know what she wanted to do She didn't seem ambitious or motivated and on top of that she was like really out of shape She I was just not attracted to her at all But like my 15 year old brains telling me look like you gotta like at least do something with this girl because it's like You were so in love with her in the past. So we had drinks And then I gave you know, I gave her a kiss on the cheek at the end actually No, she gave me a kiss on the cheek at the end. That's what happened and I Just remember leaving and I didn't talk to her after that man I think I texted her once just to say hey, I think we should just be friends but that's how it went down and I Think about what she was thinking how she felt at that moment, you know Do you think she lives in regret? Do you think she regrets not getting with me? Maybe she might maybe she's so totally happy with the way she is But I know how it I how I feel and if I passed up the opportunity like I did before previously I would feel a lot of regret man The different the thing about women and men is that men tend to get better with age and then women kind of peek at around 21 22 and Then they can maintain that if they're taking care of themselves for sure but in terms of Their their mate value That goes down and guys tend to get better with age so Don't be scared if you're if you're getting rejected man. Remember Rejection is better than regret at least you're pushing yourself at least you're going out for the stuff that you want And then later on when you do find that special girl You know that you found the right one because you pushed yourselves to achieve your potential. I Want you guys to get the best thing for you And you're not gonna get the best thing just by sitting on your ass waiting for that magical girl to come to you You have to experience hardship You have to go through failure if you don't go through that you are never going to achieve your potential. I Don't want you to sit there in regret and to think that oh I could have done this I could have done that if I had just pushed myself if I had just tried if I had talked to That girl I don't want that to happen to you guys so remember these stories that I told you because If you think it's uneven if you think the dating market is skewed where it should just be you know It should be totally equal or men and women should be getting rejected at the same rate Well, men and women deal with pain, but it's just in different flavors And I honestly think we got the better end of that deal