 So Marie, what do you think is the number one frustration I hear from women when it comes to dating mating or relating? Probably they want more from men. Okay, like what kind of more? More commit bit more time. Yeah I don't know. I think a lot of men out there just don't know what they want so they Well, I think part of the problem is divorce, you know divorce has caused men especially in the last 20 years To become gun shy when it comes to relationships and since my audience is those in midlife after baby making years before Retirement roughly 75% of people who are out there in the dating marketplace are divorced. I think they're really gun shy Never thought no Well, I just want to make sure I don't cut you off because everyone says I cut you off so so So it occurs to me that a significant percentage of relationships are Situationships they're casual and they're friends with benefits I mean, I'll agree to that. Okay. In fact, I would say it's probably 80% of the people Okay, excluding people are married excluding people that are living together I'd say the bulk of the relationships out there are either friends with benefits situationships or casual Yeah, and I think well my opinion is a lot of people don't even know where they stand in a relationship Yeah, like men and women alike. Yes, I would agree I think and the hard part is it's not just about getting to know someone and Getting to know if you're compatible with one another, but really are you a good long-term fit for one another and If you're not fully engaged in the process right from the beginning, it's gonna be really difficult Well, let me give an example and you tell me what you think so For those who watch Marie and I watch this show called love is blind we watch married at first sight It's re solve her research It's research for me. What I like about these shows though in the sense is it really? Highlights the fact that many of these people are getting together in They're with each other 24-7 and in many cases for two to no For almost two months, but first they get to know each other without seeing each other So now they've gotten to know each other emotionally. Yeah, but not they haven't seen each other physically and that's when The disconnect starts after that. Well, okay, so you which is good You're actually seeing if you can connect at an emotional level But however at the same time we do need that physical attraction because chemistry is an important piece Yet what I'm really getting into is after that initial meeting They actually spend time with each other in each other's lives to see if they actually work together I mean if they when I say work together, I mean that they're they work compatible compatible with thank you for for that clarity so compatibility is something that couples rarely really talk about in The early stage of dating they just kind of go at it dumb dumbfoundedly or blindly How did they do it back? Like, you know, my parents got married in 12 days Like well, okay, that's how to figure it out. Well, the difference though is they made that commitment to one another They didn't go and get an annul three days later or they didn't the person didn't start ghosting and disappearing You know six weeks later. Yeah, they were in it in many cases. They got pregnant and they were really in it. Okay You can get pregnant for a while, but still, you know, 12 days. That's pretty crazy No, even well for my mom that was pretty crazy because she wasn't a risk taker So, okay, so with that said let's dive into what it takes to really get more out of a relationship That's really what I want to lean into and let me just say this For those watching, this isn't you know, I know the title is if you want more from a man This is really if two people want more from each other and they're approaching the relationship from a healthy place Because as you and I were talking about beforehand, you know, we're really dealing with a wounded population I said earlier that men are gun-shy. I think women are just as gun-shy as well I think women have it have it of getting more attached to men Sooner rather than later and they don't even know if the guy is into them now. Yeah, you know other than but the hard part is in the Initial stages. There's all the lusts. There's the limerence. There's the infatuation stage You get all excited and then you have sex together And then you have no clue if you're compatible with one another in many cases So we're gonna talk about Listen, I said that this is true for men and women alike, but if you really want to establish a really healthy Relationship from the get-go. Okay, and let me just say this this is this title isn't for those who are married or already in a relationship Those are for those single looking for love And by the way, if you need some support with that check out a link right here to a free discovery call with me to See if working with a coach is right for you. It's in the description below If you want to speak to me and talk about learning how to develop compatibility You have something to share Yeah, you know when you say that it for people that are in or not in a relationship But there are a lot of you out there that think you're in a relationship And that you know, that's part of the problem, too Is it not being on the same page and they don't know well that goes back to what I said earlier, you know Many 80% of what I see out there are Situationships those are ones where they might see each other on a regular basis They might have some You know monogamy and I say maybe you know they might be exclusive with one another But there's no real clarity on it. That's what the situation ship a casual relationship is usually those people that want companionship connection and sex Without any real commitment and friends with benefits goes without saying what that is, you know That's just an agreement that we're gonna have sex together whenever we want and but there's no commitment But you're right When you enter into the process with ambivalence, then we refrain that without clarity without clarity It's gonna create a ton of confusion And this is what I want to lean into and then I'll share what those six things to do with a man if you want more from him so We started our relationship with something we call radical honesty laying our cards on the table and I call it the rules of engagement. That's establishing your standards So the first principle this is something you want to do with every man is radical honesty and what that means is in and part of that is Laying your cards on the table means unpacking your past experiences Why did was that important for us to unpack our past our past relationships? I should say well from I can only say for me It was because I I wanted to know when you didn't know who I was and You know what I've been through in life and and then and I wanted to hear from you Why was that beneficial for you to hear my side like what value did you get out? I wanted to see how you handle breakups in the past how you know all those things that that are important and You know taking ownership for some of the things that that you did in the past. Yeah a Lot of things that we talked about was gratitude because even in the worst relationships. There's something you learned. Yeah It's just like travel. There's always something to learn in the worst places Okay, so let me ask you a question. How do you know I wasn't lying to you? Well, I didn't but you know, some of it is a leap of faith. Okay, but you know You ask a lot of questions so by asking a lot of questions of each other by sharing a lot of we do other I think it's like the way a detective tries to trip up a Criminal suspect if you do enough people are going to reveal themselves And yet a lot of men and women are reluctant to talk about their past Relationships fact some men will even say oh, I don't want to talk about that's the past I don't live in the past anymore Like what would you do if a man did that or did that ever happen to you? Let me refrain that Well, once I I actually you know started crying And this is the gentleman that said he wanted to take it slow But then he proceeded to tell me how everybody's cheated on him and everybody's this and everybody's that and and in the end it he had you know serious trust issues and Something I wanted to be a part of so in that fact-finding mission for yourself You kind of gleaned he had trust issues and would you say he was honest with you and transparent? Well, he was honest about the things that happened. It's just that it yes I think in telling me his story as far as I know it might have been a lie Who knows but at least he told me these things and then I started realizing that he had serious trust issues when You know little things would happen and I Was okay You are telling him your you are being honest and transparent He was being honest and transparent and in that you recognize that you weren't a fit for one another correct Okay, but the value of doing that is part of the process where someone will either lean into you by doing it Or they're going to push away because it's not a fit for each other. Okay number two Men want to be accepted for who they are. I think men and women both want to be accepted for who they are, right? Yeah, who doesn't want to be accepted. Yeah, you know the challenge is if you want something different You either okay first off you can't change a guy's height. You can't change a woman's, you know Wrinkles or whatnot. Well, maybe you can with plastic surgery, but But my point is you can't change things about a person But if you want something more emotional, you can certainly guide a person but if you want more from a man and you've guided him and By if you haven't accepted him and you want something different you either guide him or you move on I think a lot of times we don't I think in many dating scenarios. We don't accept her people Fully and that's part of unconditional love. Okay, but how do you accept somebody that you don't know yet? like when they're You don't know the person you're you're just taking it at face value what they're telling you That's why you have to continue to ask the question Well, I think by accepting a person if you constantly well, let's go back to trust issues I suspect that man you were speaking of he had trust issues. He didn't accept you on face value He already had a predisposition for Expecting the worst to happen and if you're expecting the worst to happen it most likely will have it Okay, so accepting a person through there also means not prejudging them I think women do that as much as men do that. In fact, I think more so in some ways Well, that's no, I think it's it's equal Okay, yesterday we were talking about dating with some with some people we were at an event and You know a lot of people do meet on dating apps And one lady was telling me that she met her current husband on her 66th date And I thought to myself gosh, I never kept track, but you know, she knows it was the 66th date Well, she also said she had given up by the I think she gave up on the 65th date She wasn't going to go out with anyone this guy's profile or Doug's profile was in her inbox And she thought you know what? I'm done with the online dating But I'm going to give this one person the chance because he lives close by and what do I have to lose? They had a great first date turned into a second date and 10 years later They're now married. In fact, we went to a wedding this past weekend With the couple who had met on match.com two and a half years. No almost almost. Yeah, almost Yeah, yeah something like that. Yeah, they got it and my point of bringing this up is this wedding There were so many couples there who had met their partner on a dating app because there were a lot of divorcee Is there that we're married the second time around they met on a dating app Marie and I met on a dating app And so I want you to everyone to know something while you might feel frustrated with the dating apps while you might feel like Ah, you want to pull your hair out? It still happens to be the number one place people are meeting these days for those of us in midlife Yeah, well the other thing is like at this point in my life. I didn't want to hang out at bars Except when I was going to go win those shoes I Okay, so number three Men want clear communication Ladies, I'm here to tell you men are not mind-readers And one of the things I appreciate about you is when you have something on your mind, you don't sugarcoat it Well, let me reframe that it's not about sugarcoating. You're not passive about it. You're very direct And I can't at the moment think of something in particular unless you can That you shared with me. I can't look I'm very easy going and if there's something I don't like I To me, it's it's really easy to say, you know, it's something we do that can we do it this way instead of that way So all right. Do you mind sharing really quickly? I know I'm putting on the spot here You're telling me a story right before we started about a man who pushed his chair up against you I don't want you to tell the whole story. Just share tell quickly what happened and share what you said to him Because that's what matters most these this was one of the very first states I ever went on from a dating app and And I got there first and it was just sitting at a bar and he came in and Right away. I you know, I'm like this is not my type of man But you know, but I can talk to him for a little bit no problem And he pulls up his chair and pulls me in between his legs on the bar stool And I thought okay, how am I gonna handle this one? So I said, you know, Bill whatever I Just have a question. What am I doing that makes you think that this is okay with me? I Love that by the way, what am I doing to make you think this is okay with me? What did he say? He says well, why wouldn't it be okay? Is that what he said? Yeah, well, I ended up not Staying very yeah. So what I appreciate this is where a lot of you ladies. I just want to say something to you It's okay to be direct if something's uncomfortable You don't have to worry about hurting somebody's feelings. You are not responsible for someone else's feelings You are Responsible for maintaining I would say your sovereignty your self-worth and most importantly your self-respect So in this particular case, you didn't you know brush it off. You were very direct. This wasn't okay for me Well, and it was also my safety because you know, I don't know kind of tough and rugged I don't know what I would do if this guy gets mad. Well, you were in a bar though, right? Yeah, hopefully you can scream but the point is is honest I mean, I was talking about clear communication in relationship I mean that was a circumstance where there was a crossing of a boundary But the point is clear communication is also expressing your needs wants and desires in a way that's seen heard and understood And again, we man can't guess what you're thinking. I Don't get it. Why not One of the mysteries of the world, okay, just like anyway, all right number four Men want to have fun. Okay. Why I'm bringing this one up And by the way for the record Marie plans all of our travel arrangements because that's like your part-time job is a travel agent These are some fun things. Why I'm bringing this up is I speak to so many women who are having relationships with men that are strictly On their smartphone. It's just text message relationships. That's not fun No, I mean, that's therapy That's hate that might be a replacement for therapy But that's not fun real fun is doing stuff together Social activities hobbies mutual interest spending time with family and friends This should be an integral part of a relationship is and I don't mean fun in the bedroom per se. That's next Well that when you said fun, I thought that's what you were referring to. Well, that's okay I'm the next one men want physical and emotional intimacy. Let's say what women to initiate. I Hear a lot of complaints from men saying they wish women I'm not complaining. I'm very happy. Okay, but I said emotional intimacy The fact is Okay, so I was with the group. We were at a wedding I just shared with you and there was dozens and dozens of dozens of couples and many of the men are part of my men's group I'm involved in one of the key things they said that made a difference in each one of their Relationships was the women they were with it wasn't just a physical relationship. It was an emotional relationship In other words, these are women that they felt safe enough to share their truth with And I believe many couples don't cultivate True emotional intimacy. In fact folks, I want to recommend a book for everyone Do not familiar with the book emotional intimacy by Robert Masters. I highly recommend checking this out folks Many of you don't know how to cultivate emotional intimacy many most men are clueless at it But I'm here to say as much as you want to just sit back in your feminine energy and let a man lead I'm saying you're giving the job to the wrong person because men do not know how to lead emotional intimacy I mean, I'm a uniform but No, no, no the emotional intimacy like some men just just don't they just don't know how to do it They don't know how to talk Then don't know like so you have to ask them ask them questions And sometimes they'll be uncomfortable now if he's not that into you and he just wants a physical relationship He's not gonna want to answer anything mostly. Yeah. Yeah So no, but you bring up a good point and and again man It's it's not just in the asking of the question. That's the invitation to which is the same thing It's being inquisitive. It's the invitation to go deeper than just the surface Marine knows like she hears me joke You know what I'm gonna say these days most really how's your day going? Did you have a good do it for it? No Did you have a good day? I hope you had a good day. Did you have a good day? You know you were you briefly dated a man that that was the extent of his messages to you that the momentous dishes Yeah So I'm here to say if you want to go deeper then you have to cultivate not just the physical the emotional intimacy and last but not least Men want to be respected. They want to be respected for their choices. They want to particularly their choices. So Marie knows this story. I was in a relationship with a woman who literally I couldn't pick a restaurant that she liked I mean it wasn't gluten-free. It wasn't the right atmosphere that wasn't this or like I could I was like I Constantly was on eggshells because I couldn't make her happy and I realized later I compromised myself by making her trying to always make her happy and I realized I wasn't respected for my choices Do you respect me for my choices I just make all the choices I Think we do it together Well, I appreciate that so I want to just Rat put a bow on all this folks if you want to change your narrative if you want more from a man and again What I shared is true for men and women alike. It begins by starting a foundation early in the dating process Radical honesty, okay? That just means being honest and transparent laying your cards on the table That's being really Transparent about your past because I feel like that's an important piece in getting to know a person and most importantly the rules of Engagement, what are your standards? What is your standard and what I mean by standard? um What did your dating profile said you wanted a? deeply committed relationship Deeply emotionally committed relationship that would lead to mutual trust and admiration. Okay, so that was part of your standard Okay, that was the other day. We found that list Oh, yeah, Marie had a list of all the things you wanted in a relationship when we reviewed that I found it recently in an old Notebook and well when I'm also talking about in the rules of engagement is how often you see each other How often you communicate with one another how often you're physically intimate with one another it's important to have these conversations Rather than be passive or cavalier because you have a greater chance for success When you have clarity up front Yes, I'm gonna say That's true. However, oh, you're gonna go on these meet-and-greets and you're gonna figure out like that guy that pulled it me into That this is not somebody that you're gonna want to even know what their life is about So it's not everyone is you're gonna be able to do that with but if you find someone and you connect That's at that point where you I think you should start asking the questions So something interesting because you brought up Cheryl who had gone on 66 date before she met Doug. I Think we have to get past this Fantasy that finding a mate is easy. It's hard We're dealing with a dysfunctional population of human beings and as I said given that the significant percentage or divorce We have gun-shy people. We have big people that have trust issues. We have people that are Unstable in their lives, and I don't mean mentally unstable I mean, maybe they're financially unstable in their lives or maybe other aspects or lives are in chaos It's important to weed people out. This is why I created my private coaching program So you learn how to we it's when I say weed people out I call it bedding screening and filtering because you want to put the odds in your favor and a lot Of times you can do this even over the phone before you ever do a meet-and-greet That's great FaceTime We didn't FaceTime though. No, we didn't I think we knew what we'd each other look like based on the thousands of pictures We've seen I mean we're Facebook friends too. So there is something that I wanted to say Okay, sometimes when when you go out and meet somebody you have this idea of who they're going to be And you have to that's one thing you have to like stop do it like I had it came to the point Is that I got to stop doing that I have to just let it happen Some of these men also if they've been in long marriages They are even more clueless Like it happened to me because I had been married my whole life when I got thrown into the dating world So met you know for men I think it's even worse because they they just relied on So, you know, it's interesting. I've heard women. Sorry. I heard women say, you know, how can this be a 60 or 58 year old man and be so clueless Well, he got married when he was 20 age or 22 Yeah, he probably has terrible social skills and and poor relationship skills and poor emotional maturity Maybe he pays his bills on time. That's a sense of responsibility But to assume that just because someone's older that they have emotional maturity and relationship skills, that's naive on your part I Know someone that's 65 and it's still a child. Yeah, let's not get into that All right, we're gonna take questions now for those who know the format of my channel If you have a question write the word question then post the question there after or you can purchase the super sticker Super chat all the monies from the super sticker super chat Those to a scholarship fund in the name of my son Connor as late He's my son right there who's passed away and in his honor I've started a scholarship fund to donate to causes like the Hoffman process Insight Institute Just to name a few and I want to give props to someone who's already given us a super sticker Sarah Thank you so much for the 99. What's that symbol there? Is that English pound yeah British pound British pound. Okay. Thank you so much Let's see if we have any questions I know I saw a question oh here was Allison by the way, thank you for being a member of the group as well Allison Member of the YouTube channel. Okay. I want to give you your props question My dad won't meet my partner until we're both divorced my divorce came through this week But my partner's ex is absolute nightmare. How do I make him aware of how it's making me feel? My dad won't meet my partner until we're both divorced You can't control what your dad wants. Yeah You know it makes may make you feel bad, but he's just looking up for you Like he wants to make sure the guy really is divorced. That's what I would think so Okay, there's a reluctancy, but not the same token if my dad if okay if my Parent knew that someone was important to me. I would want them to vet that person too I'm just putting that out there. Yeah, you could say dad. I need your opinion on this I need to know if you find this person worthy of me. I need you to be my protector here That that's at least a possibility you could put out there. I'm just yeah, what do you think? No? I think that's a great. Okay. I didn't think of it that way. Okay, Allison. Thank you so much for that I really appreciate it. All right, we really appreciate it Let's keep swimming Allison says what about starting with writing down your standards rather than expectations and stick by that? Okay Well, that's okay. So going through some old notebooks I found a list of all the things that I wanted in a partner. Okay, and I you know to me that was I called it core values Well, here's the thing that those are things that were You know, that's what I wanted. No, and I know that and so I'm gonna make a criticism No, no, I'm not gonna it's not gonna be what you think. Okay, so in your core values You wanted honesty. You wanted respect. You wanted responsibility. You wanted Affection integrity. Well, these are a lot of great words. Okay, and there are important That's why I had so many of them. Okay The challenge with all these words is how do you evaluate the person? See, it's great to want those things and I think by to some degree Everybody wants the same thing Okay, but but then the expectation like when she's asking, you know, the expectation is How is this guy gonna gonna work for me in my life? Okay, now that's different. So that's what I call Okay, so there's the qualities you'd like in a person Those are all the things you want to feel in relationship what I'm here to say Standards are the nuts and bolts. Okay. I want to see three four days and nights a week together doing shared activities Hobbies mutual interest spending time with family and friends traveling together Teamwork building skills both in your personal and your professional life intimacy both physical and emotional intimacy that leads either moving in together getting married Why that's a standard. There's some nuts and bolts there It's not all these flower and words of like responsibility and respect and Integrity but I like well, I know and it's good to be attentive. Okay, so let me give you an example of a value Punctuality. Yes, that's a value. Now. That's an important value to me Okay, interestingly enough I've dated a lot of women who are habitually late to everything. Thankfully Marie isn't back. She's Back, you're shockingly like when you say an hour, you're 59 minutes Or 58 minutes, you're not an hour and 10 minutes. You're not now, but okay So punctuality is a value at the same time. That's not a deal breaker for me That value, you know what for me it would be a deal breaker Habitual versus the occasional lack of punctuality. Yeah, well, and we have everybody has a phone you could always text and say You know traffic's bad, whatever. No, but about what I'm getting to though And I agree that to you have to know which those top values are to you versus ones like travel was a Adventure we'll say isn't it a value. I wanted an adventurous person You if you had your druthers, you would travel every month. Okay Well, you know, I can't do that. I would be a nomad But you accept me even though I don't live up to that particular value But my point is it we have to be careful not to make these some values so rigid What are the core ones but coming back to the point of standards and this is critically important folks If you don't know what you want your relationship to look like and I mean day in day out You should grab a calendar right now grab an old-fashioned paper calendar Imagine you're in a relationship. What does Monday look like? What does Tuesday look like? What does Wednesday look like what does Thursday look like what does Friday look like what does Saturday and Sunday and do that for an entire year to visualize what it would actually look like But Jonathan, I'm in a long distance relationship and all we do is text and I'm not met him and it's been six years Ladies you guys are batshit crazy sometimes when I hear you say you're in a relationship with someone whom you've never met and then Furthermore being in a relationship with someone where you don't have a clarity on Where is this relationship going? Okay? I went on my rant Well, but do you understand why I go on these rants, yeah, but okay, so for me Okay, that list that I made is basically I Wanted a good guy, but You know, there's a lot of good guys or appear to be good guys So that's why I thought you know if he checks enough of these then Then I would want to move forward. It's just a good guy. Okay, however now I'm gonna do a however You've got to ask the questions to see if they fit into that. Okay, right? All right, DD writes question Do either of you believe in reincarnation, how do you explain when you have just met someone but feel like you've known them forever It's kind of an irony with that question. Didn't we have this conversation today or was it last night? That was today we watched the Ten Commandments last night and we were talking about we were talking about the Bible and resurrection and Did you say you believed in reincarnation I forget no I didn't say that Well without getting into religion I When I was doing my soul searching and my healing and stuff I had a past life regression because I had read all these books by Dr. Brian Weiss. Yeah, Brian Weiss Yeah, sure and and so he he talks about all that and so it was very interesting It it was worth doing if it really happened I will never know but it was worth doing do I really believe in reincarnation I you know, I don't know. I'm on the fence for that one. I know you do. Yeah, I actually believe that When we pass on whether it's reincarnation or that our souls Live another experience in a new body if you while I believe in that I believe to some degree we are soulmates and I've shared this with you I do believe the fact that we had We didn't have instant chemistry when we met it wasn't chemistry But there was this absolute comfort with one another and our relationship to this day is incredibly Comfortable, it's very peaceful. It's calm. Is that because we have done this a couple dozen thousand times before It's a possibility. I I don't exclude that possibility I will say this though When you're in the right relationship, it shouldn't feel like butterflies. It should feel like calm At least that's my opinion. Yeah, I think so, but you know back to the reincarnation like there I am like fascinated by shows that show little kids that are remembering previous lives and talking to Parents and telling them where I lived and this guy Mateo. They were watching. Oh, that's a different He's he's reliving how he lived in Atlantis and aliens and stuff. It's fascinating. So anyways, go to the Gaia channel Matthias, I can't remember his last name This is all the silver. So anyway, you might want to check that out. Okay. Thank you Matias to Silva. Thank you for that question Monica writes question. I Met I have a meet and greet this week You said speak on the phone start betting him or small talk, of course, how was your day? Okay? I am a big believer the first phone call is the first date That's actually the time where you could do a lot of question answering in fact You remember our second telephone call. I had my list. Oh Yeah, so he has this list of you know box What a woman had to you know, well, there were questions like I wanted to know where you stood on well, especially because of politics With I mean, it's really on the forefront here in the United States Especially yeah, yeah, we met in 2001. I mean we met online 2021 excuse me Vaccines how you felt about that I wanted to get a sense of that how you felt about Spirituality how you felt about finding out some information. We had us our second phone call was four hours long But you know what it was COVID. We had nothing better to do. She lived in Chicago. I lived in LA It was like, you know something to do And I'm I think we're both honest with each other We're just killing time in some ways, but we got to really unpack a lot of stuff right before we ever met Yeah, so I believe the first phone call is the first date All right Our one Warren says question. I've been seeing a guy very nice guy. We have a lot of similar interest He tries too hard. It's a turnoff. I don't know how to handle it any suggestions Well, you I'm gonna ask you this one because you're good at handling if someone was trying too hard with me You know what it's tough because if you're being turned off by it Like I mean, do you feel comfortable saying something to him say? Hey, you know, I really like you and I like what we're doing But can you know, let's Can we calm you down? So, okay when well, I'm to the extent that I Related to our relationship, you know, I felt like we had a good balance But once we were connected with one another I got rather excited And I'm just gonna share with you ladies when a man gets excited We try too hard. We're partially because we're territorial. We don't want you dating other people You know, we like to that's is why some men like to pin you down. Well, not literally figuratively But it's just most of the time it's just a It's a reflection of his excitement. He feels good about you and he tries a little bit harder. I Know you're good at communicating you I'm sure you have something in your well That you would say if someone was trying to art, I know you just said what you did a moment ago, but Well, actually something different came to mind Okay, some women are not used to a guy treating them well Hmm, and then they think he tries too hard like in the show Love is blind Jackalina. Oh, yeah, the guy Marshall. I mean a nice. We're watching love is blind, but she likes, you know, the tough guys She likes the jerks the asses the bad boys Yeah, the players the ballers and here's a nice guy and because he's effusive because he's demonstrative because he's Communicative she feels like it's overwhelming. So I only bring this up I think why you brought this up is our warrant is look inside. Is there something inside you that says this person feels Too much because you're not ready for too much. I Mean, I'm just putting that out maybe maybe it's time to say, you know, I really like you But let's take things a little slow, you know, I get it I've been there to it in some as long as it's not love bombing But, you know, like I am a terrible texer and when people would text me and you know all these emojis and stuff and it's like oh god now I don't know what to do with this and I'm driving and then I forget And they get upset because I didn't respond right away Well, thankfully you don't have to worry that because we don't text each other anymore or barely All right, let's keep swimming here. Deanna said thank you for that question our warrant question Message Message for 11 wait one and a half years finally met three weeks ago. We both enjoyed it. I don't Want to always be the one who said wait, I don't want to be the one who says I want to see him We message daily should I say I really like to see you this weekend You know, you've been messaging for a year and a half. Okay I I would hope you built a sense of rapport with one another a sense of friendship That you would want to mutually see each other. So the question is You can certainly bring it up and say hey, you know, I really like you. I'd like to see you this weekend And you could do that just to see how he responds Why were you messaging for a year and a half? I'm going to guess that there's long distance. Yeah Well, probably not though because they said like to see you this weekend So that means they probably are closer. There just might be an hour away I'm just going to guess that it's not long distance like us. It's just probably, you know car right away And that's well things went well and how do you feel? Does he like you? Do you think do you think that he really wants to continue this? Well, then you should be okay with seeing you And again if a man likes you he's going to want to take he's most men want to see you if they like you So here's the thing You've been messaging for a year and a half. That's a weak form of communication It's a lot of attachment based on a bunch of characters on a screen 26 letters in an alphabet and nine or 10 numbers if you will So here's the thing have a Honest conversation with them open an honest conversation with them Ask them where he stands and then go from there create a dialogue Invite a conversation. That's my suggestion deanna All right, let's keep swimming. Hey leave good to see you in the house one of our members here All right, one of our facebook group members Do you and marie believe in the law of assumption? Do you and marie manifest each other? I'm familiar with the law of attraction. I'm not familiar with the law of assumption I don't like to see we manifest each other. Okay. Here's an interesting thing So when I first went to his apartment, uh, when I first, oh, yeah, yeah, this is a good story He's got this vision board And and in his vision board he had a picture marie osmond because and i'm like, oh So you like the name marie And and for me marie osmond was always You know like I I wore my hair like her a lot in my life because that's why I like that picture. I just love the hair Yeah, so I don't know. I guess you manifested me did manifest you. I think you manifested me I didn't have a vision board Well, I'm grateful All right Thank you for one of our midlife love mastery members By the way, if you want to find out about the group check out the link below to my group called midlife love mastery Also, if you want to join the youtube channel as a group member and have a Stick a badge all to your to yourself. Check out the join button to join the membership. All right, let's keep going Hey manusha question should we reject a guy right off the bat because of std and furfies So if I told you I'd herpes, would you have rejected me? Well, because I've been in the medical field herpes is just a skin disease It's like a note They don't even test for it now when they do std panels. Oh, they don't you have to ask for it And you know, I mean by at some point uti eyes are common for women, you know Lottery and all that kind of stuff is common. And by the way a penicillin shot makes it go away, but but yeah, but um I have a friend that freaked out because she got furfies and I you know, I gave her the literature and I said look Yeah, I I would be honest and I would use protection but But I don't think it most well. I know most guys could probably care less about it I mean getting it but I think from a woman's perspective. I think doing an std test is prudent You know, um, we didn't but I I feel like in our and I'm just being transparent with everyone I just felt like we were both I Before me. Yeah I had one maybe well, I had blood work and I did have one maybe six months before I met you How soon but you did a lot of stuff in six months. No, I did not do a lot of stuff in six months in fact A month before I just oh, yeah, that's right But you did whenever I got blood work and you know, okay No, I had six seven months before we met I had one so okay. That's transparency from us Hope minutiae. I hope you feel happy with that question. Oh, what am I? Let's see. What else do we have here? Kristen says minutiae you should not reject for that herpes is actually a skin condition spreads from the skin to skin contact He can have you can take antivirals to reduce the spread. There you go. Great. Thank you for that Uh, Kristen also writes question I'm dating a guy who may move overseas to be near his kids. Do I end it because men choose their kids right? Well Is he asking you to move with him? I think it's going to be difficult to carry on a relationship Your distance is it's one thing to be 1600 1700 miles It's another thing when you're 3000 miles and certainly another thing when you're 5000 miles from right Um, is he asking you what did you say? I said well if he Would you even consider moving as well? I mean if you're if you're not considering moving and he's going to move Then I would suggest and Or have a real. Well, you should have real serious dialogue about the relationship and how this would even fit If if you did take on this move at the same time Again a relationship only works most of the time folks when you live in the same place Yeah, I was willing to move anywhere. I didn't you know, I'm an adventurous person I would have moved international well in our particular case It wouldn't have worked if you didn't move Because I wasn't ready to move away from my son and you have two children to live here We hang out with them more than you hang out with your other kids All right Sunny pie says question I'm madly in love with this guy who isn't interested in me. I want to chase him because he is my dream guy I think it's okay to chase someone who is perfect to me Why not? You're certainly welcome to do whatever you want, but the fact who isn't interested in you Now has he clearly said he's not interested in you if he has said that What's the definition of insanity folks? Doing stupid shit over and over again expecting different results. That's not a smart move on your part Okay, you can make F. Would you have a different opinion? No, I I just He's telling you He's telling you that he's not interested. The other thing listen when people tell you that I think it's okay to chase someone who is perfect for me Believe me. We've been together for almost a year and we're still not sure if we're perfect for each other And I'm being tongue-in-cheek here It you until you actually physically have a day-in-day out relationship It is a fantasy to believe someone is perfect for you. Trust me There the bodies are buried from here to the moon people the hot that they were perfect for each other Only to find out it didn't work out that is a naive And I'll be quite frankly Fantasy thinking on your part sunny pie and I'm being blunt here because you need a little bit of a wake-up call from your big brother So I wouldn't recommend chase. Listen, you can do whatever you want, but I wouldn't recommend chasing anyone By the way, anyone watching this right now. Do you agree? That's a bad move post a comment Um, you have something to say. Yeah, okay. You had somebody that was chasing you. Oh, yeah What was her nickname? No, I once had someone chasing me. She I called her stalker Ladies when a guy doesn't want to invest in you. You should be really clear and choose yourself Over him. That's my invitation for you All right, let's keep swimming uh Let's see I can't even figure out how to pronounce that name question. What do you think a nice man? What do you think a nice man but don't know how to talk romantically? What do I think about my nice men who do not know how to talk romantically? You know character matters more than romance in my opinion And sometimes okay What's something I do for you every morning? Oh, at least my coffee out With the creamer and all that stuff everything ready for me Okay, because he gets up earlier now. Is that romantic? No, it's just sweet. Okay. So but it's I don't do overly romantic things in our relationship. We But we do nice things for each other all the time Why i'm bringing this up is doing nice things for each other is a hell of a lot better than expecting grand romance And i'm being a little you know, uh And you know in flowers and all that, you know I'm a romantic but not like those kinds of gestures are They're okay. They're sweet. They're nice But it's not something that I would want from someone I just met I think no, but it's not this let's take this beyond just met. Let's talk about Listen, I think nice gestures Outway romance every day of the week and twice on sunday when two people can be considerate to one another They can be teammates with one another They actually invest in the nice things instead of romantic things has more value at least by the way That's my opinion take it for what it's worth All right. Thank you Question my guy is still friends with his ex we keep running into her as we are in the same circles I feel awkward but trying to fit in help Where did we spend this weekend? We stayed at his ex-girlfriend's house after this morning that we went to Okay. Oh, wait, wait. Who did we visit before? An ex-boyfriend of mine We visit my ex-boyfriend of yours hung out with him He's now my financial advisor for does some work for me We stayed at my ex-girlfriend's house because the wedding because we run in the same circle of friends folks It's only unhealthy when someone has a romantic attachment to a past lover or they have emotional Sex with their previous lover and what I mean by emotional sex is it's their conversations have an element of Well, I know you talk about intimate things with your With your ex-boyfriend By the way, this is a boyfriend when she was 16 years old Yeah, when I was in high school. It doesn't you know, it almost doesn't count. He's been my best friend ever since But my first But my husband. Yeah At first he he did not Like I there were years where I couldn't talk to him because it caused Well, and if you were having emotional conversations about your relationship with a former lover I don't think that's healthy. That's what I meant by emotional sex emotional conversations About your partner now you fast forward all these years He's friends with my ex-husband and my ex-husband does favors for him and when he's in town He takes everybody out to dinner and stuff. So, you know what living in harmony makes life easier. Yes, I agree All right, I hope that helped Kathy uh Let's see. Let's get a lot of comments. Yeah, I agree. Oh by the way, sunny pie says, oh, thank you. You're very welcome You needed some top love there Um, one of our facebook members says yes, that's a bad move to chase him. All right Oh Wait, someone put it all in caps Apologies for putting this all in caps, but star shine asked a question at the beginning. Please. Can you answer it for her? I don't know what it is. Uh, can someone whoever finds star shines question and post it so we can find it with the words question Yeah, we get a lot of comments. So it's hard. It's not easy to find folks. That's why I need the word question in front Here's a question How do men respond to detached energy from a woman a mindset of not having any expectations from a man while still Desiring a progression How do men Okay, so I think they're talking about you I was gonna say that really does sound familiar. So I don't I don't attach easily actually your lack of attack lack, well, it's not It's not so much attachment. What it is is a level of I don't feel a sense of desperation or neediness from you well Again, I did a lot of personal work and development and stuff So I I just learned that whatever is going to happen is going to happen and for me to worry about it or it's just Well, we man assume that you guys are all into us and we're going to hurt your feelings if we end it I knew somehow with you if it didn't work out you'd be like, yeah, okay I think maybe because we impact our past relationships so much That I got this a sense that you weren't you weren't desperate. Yeah And believe me. I wasn't always like this you know when you spend I was married my whole life up until I was like what? 52 no like you I thought you were 48, but anyway But yeah, so it's like when you just you have to do work on yourself And then you start realizing yeah, this is a no I'm not going to so but I but the real question is how do men respond The fact that you don't invest more in the relationship than I do The fact that you aren't I don't feel desperate, huh? Well, you don't invest more In the in the relationship. No, I think we invest equally. Oh got it. You're not in other words. You're not chasing me You're not desperate. You're not needy. It makes me try harder No, okay. Okay. Well, that's how I feel. So when a woman is in a state of neutrality A man is most like so long as he doesn't feel you desperate or needy or chasing him like sunny pie was considering doing We're probably going to invest at the same level at a place of Go ahead. But wasn't the question about About how do men respond to a woman that that doesn't seem attached Detached energy detached energy I I don't think we need we need encouragement Yeah, you look you you have to push it along if you're interested otherwise if you're just going to sit there and be Sitting your feminine energy No, no guy is going to put up with someone that just sits there waiting to be you know, like, yeah, you know It's just all about well some guys will but those are looking for trophies. Okay. Okay Let's keep going Personal question from alaina Jonathan, what service do you use for your photos? I'm loving the different photos every time you do a video or live Uh photo those those pictures. Oh you're talking about these pictures Here's a sample of one These are mixed tiles everyone. This is called mixed tiles You can see the back. They're all over social media. Yeah, just type in mixed tiles mentioned my name But I I bought this for my old place where I had them on the wall Now I just changed the pictures in the back And including the ones of the children. So thank you so much for that question Uh, let's keep swimming So sonny pie was saying maybe fantasy. He's perfect to me Again until you're in a relationship, you don't know if someone's perfect Oh, here's star shine question How do you deal with being in a relationship and both your parents don't like the guy Don't approve because of arguments between my mother and him, but you love him Does it ring a bell that we're talking about these last few days? um That's a tough one because Whether you like it or not If you're going to marry someone you're marrying a family. Yeah You know, it's just the way it is and some people are not going to be the best but That's a tough one. Like well, I'm going through a situation right now My ex's mother passed away and we had a complicated relationship But she was good to me when she was good to me and not so good to me when she was And I I loved her at the time, but it was it was hard. Um, I would have much rather lived in harmony So this is a case where Her parents don't like him Her parents don't like him. Well, because they're your parents and they're trying to protect you. Yeah, exactly. And uh arguments between my mother and him Um, yeah, well, he arguments between her mother like the in-laws Yeah, it would all you would always have in-law problems unless you clear that here Yeah, that's I'm not okay I'm gonna say that this is outside of my area of expertise. So you're talking about maybe counseling is required I would certainly talk to your partner because what's most important is you and your partner are on the same page Particularly about your you know, your parents maybe chill if there's if you're go ahead Well, the other thing is that you know, he needs to be on board too To try and win her over You know, that's a good point too because You know, unless you just want to write off your mom that and I would not recommend that you mean mother-in-law No, her. Oh her mom. Oh, that's right. It's her parents. It's her mom. So Because if they don't get along and you decide to get married then he's not gonna want to go over there or if you have kids It's that's gonna affect a lot of people down the road if you guys stay together. So I I think he needs to Help Men that relationship if you guys are gonna move forward. You know, I was thinking of the indian matchmaker You know what I like about the idea of the way those Oh, it's the families they actually it's the two families that meet with each other And evaluate the children. Yeah, so that's a tough one. I I think Marie's advice is spot on there. So good luck with that starshine um Miss sweet says jonathan, thank you so much. I've listened to you for two weeks And I finally found a truly genuine man who is very committed orian and we both want commitment. Yay I'm happy to hear that Love hearing success stories. Oh, here's a big one. Here's a good one question Do you do you there wait? Do you there is a Okay, is there is a is there a generally optimal time frame to start dating after divorce? I asked because I made a conscious decision about five years post divorce To make effort to meet a new partner within two months. I met a good guy and dated about a year Then within two months after that ended my current wait met a current great guy It's interesting when some have been online for years and have been on countless meet and greets. I wonder why I've been fortunate I can answer them. Okay um When I got divorced I I decided that I wasn't going to date because I was devastated I didn't want you know, I didn't want to hurt and So I thought it wouldn't be a good idea for me to meet anybody And so it was like five years before I got into a relationship. I don't Everybody's different um You don't want to bring baggage into another or you know, we all have baggage But you want it to be what is it fit neatly under the sea in front of you Yeah, wait, wait You wanted to fit in the overall in the overhead bin instead of having to use a sky cap to Put your bags away So I after my divorce I was on a I was online dating, you know habitually and I realized that's what you did just to keep Well, I wanted companionship. I wanted connection. I wanted sex I had no idea how to commit to anyone and after one year and a hundred internet dates I realized I was the problem um I still was I still took me another half a decade Before I had any clue of what I really wanted so The question is Should you date before you're ready? That's a question, okay? The question though is how do you know when you're ready? A lot of times we think we're ready when we're not ready And this is the risk you take dating for both parties. This is why I'm a big proponent Interrogate people And I say this chung and cheek, but I mean it in the sense is Ask really deep questions to determine their capability of actually being in a relationship But you know what what if you just want to date Or go on meet and greets just you know just to keep your Your mind occupied just to meet someone someone they have well, is that fair to the other person? Well, but that's where transparency comes in. Well, you but how many people are going to say, okay But guys said to you, you know what? I don't want anything serious. I just want something casual on the first meeting Well, I'd like to have sex with you, but I'm not nothing serious but I went I went on on meet and greets where You know, I ended up just friends with him Again, I'm not saying there is anything wrong. The problem is Transparency is a tough one because why are you wasting my time? Well that actually I'm thinking of a specific guy that he's he's a friend of mine and he said that he knew right away You just got the worst No, and it was just me trying to my girlfriend set up the The thing for me and I thought I'd try it out, but well, I know in the beginning. I told women I was so ready for a relationship I was so ready for a relationship then three months in I'm like I'm not ready for a relationship Because you don't know until you experience but the same time All I'm saying is this It's a risk Dating is a risk putting yourself out there is a risk and what I mean is this is why Folks if you haven't read my book What the heck is self-love anyway a journey of personal development self-help and spiritual work By the way, you can get all the books I recommend here at let's see Jonathan recommend books You can join my membership group here Uh, I know this is brand new. I just added these banners You can get a copy of my dating vows here And you can uh find out about the divorce Naked divorce and naked recovery here mentioned my name to Adele All right, let's just keep going here. Isn't that new? Isn't that cool? Yeah, that's cool Okay, uh, thank you Jonathan and Marie For helping with my question too. I'm in a tough spot because of this Well, we're sending you a big gigantic Jonathan bear hug. Okay um Melanie writes guys will tell you anything so they can Say what you want to hear but have to see actions backwards and there's no guarantees. So the work So so do the work so that if it does not work for you, you're still going to be okay. Amen. Melanie. Well said Oh, oops, how did that let's put that banner back Uh How do I take that off? I got it Okay, here we go. All right. Go back to the comments. We had one right here I had a guy said he just wants friends with benefits. I had to google it. I have more respect for myself So I said pass way to go net detective I like Michelle says I love your book recommendations You know, we've been on for over an hour. Oh really? Yeah, it's an hour and six minutes Oh impressive Jonathan. Thank you so much. This will probably be the last one zen gal question. We've been dating Six months and he mentioned marriage. I'm not sure how to address financial and medical topics You just ask Um, hey, let me see your bank account and let me see your doctor's report folks It's important. You just said something just ask Like if by the way, I'm not going to use the p in the v word Okay, ladies, if you're having regular sex with a guy, you can ask any question you want Let me repeat that if you're having regular sex with a guy You can ask any question you want. Just be straightforward. You know, we're talking about Marriage. I need to know this information Well, we weren't talking marriage, but before I moved here we talked finances We talk about I mean I had some medical issues. We talked about about that I got some medical issues um Heck he would have me a doctor here for Well, we talked I needed a cortisone injection in my shoulder and he found me a doctor here so so folks If you're in midlife and you're taking any medications, okay? I take hypertension medication You have your progesterone and all that stuff that you take this is part of life Okay at this age most people know we've got some medical shit going on so you can ask about that In fact, well quite frankly. I was a little worried. Is okay if I share about your Oh, yeah, so marie has what's known as essential tremors And one of my girlfriends who I mentioned that to her Wanted me to find out about that was I going to be taking on a person with a gigantic medical problem? And I googled it and I did some research and I found out it's hereditary. It's very but it's called benign tremors Yeah, it's a tiny little shake and you take a little medicine for it Um, but we had these conversations that we talked about money. Remember, I think you're in the jacuzzi You're in the jacuzzi. It was the second visit you had here and we laid our cards on the table We shared how much we had in the bank how much we made and make sure that this would work because if we were gonna Move in together. We need to know this stuff. So don't be afraid to ask the deeper questions I'm a big proponent of that Especially if you're having regular sex together All right, there's a question Yeah, I saw that but I want to get this one first My boyfriend and I are both in our early 60s We're both widowed for the first time in years. We both agree that we finally found the one a week ago I discovered he's in the porn cool I'm Joe. Okay. So now into porn. Let's be clear about that. Um Well, we watched porn once I don't think there's anything wrong with that as long as it's okay If he is addicted to that's exactly what I was gonna say Then I would I would find it to be a problem. Okay So let's face it men are visual creatures. We might need some visual stimulation to get the equipment going Okay, and a lot of men use pornography The question is is it a habitual problem? Is it a need? Is it for some men? That's the only way they can create an erection for themselves I would want to ask deeper questions because you discovered he's in the porn What does that mean? What does that mean? Is it that he you know is always watching porn? Or is it something that you do together in your The intimacy of your own room I know a guy that when his wife goes out of town, he'll put on porn just to occupy himself while she's gone Is that bad? I don't know, you know, I mean to each his own but again an addiction a real You know a real dependency That's a problem and that might be a tough conversation. So guess what you do you say Well, how would you bring up the convert? You're the pro at bringing up conversations. How would you frame? Just to start. Well, I get the feeling that it's already been addressed or she's already found out about it. Okay I Just be straightforward. I I don't understand why What it is that you're doing is it because of this is it because of that would you like for us to see it together would you you know There's many ways of saying stuff like I By the way, when we did it was more like I let's just do it for fun. We're like not serious about it Yeah, because I haven't looked at we couldn't agree on anything Anyway, I hope that helps Anita. Thank you so much. Let's just keep are you okay with keep going? I Question Why would a man or jenine says why would a man contact you on a dating site when he's when he's working sometimes 80 hours a week? And sometimes you haven't met because of work and he says he's got to make more. He's got to make money so Why do you care? I mean of ladies and I'm going off on a rant. Yeah, well, why do you care? Why does it matter? Why does it matter what really matters most is What matters to you jenine if this man doesn't fit in your lifestyle? There's a simple four letter word you can adapt What is the word? What is it next? Oh, yeah If he can't fit into your life, it doesn't matter Why was he on the dating sites because or why would he contact you because he wants companionship? He wants connection. He wants sex Very limitedly, but he wants someone for a booty call. He wants someone at his beck and call His lifestyle doesn't fit into yours. You say thank you so much I'm going to talk to somebody who does have the lifestyle that can fit in the mind You know, I think some guys just It's just to occupy their time. Oh, I think women do that too. I think people are lonely human beings are lonely They're thirsty for attention. They use the dating sites to connect It's it's better than going to a bar because you can do it Instantaneously on your phone at any given time. This is part of the risk. I talked earlier about risk We take in dating. This is part of the risk. Oh, by the way, I realize why I I always wipe my glasses so much Why because I need a new prescription. I keep thinking my cleaning it is going to make the pursuits make it stronger Anyways, genie gene, I only say this because You shouldn't care why a guy does anything. You should care why you're Why I would ask myself, why do I care about it? Why am I interested in it? But I would really go say hey his lifestyle doesn't fit with mine next Yeah, I think a lot of women though when Somebody that they find attractive context them and then they're not They're not there and they they're not ready to meet and You're like, why did you bother me? Why did why are you bothering me? Yes, if you're not interested because humans are dysfunctional. They're stupid You know, that's the why I would but the why is almost irrelevant is my point. That's what I'm trying to say here Next all right Leaf says thank you both very much for sharing your time and insights Marie and jonathan stay safe and love and respect yourself everyone great advice and support offered here tonight Thank you so much. Thank you. Thank you. She's one of our members here All right, michelle says next Leap goes on to say move on next exactly All right, you know what Elena says jonathan. Thank you lol All right folks I think this would be a great place to wrap up. This was fun tonight. Yeah, it was yeah I hope you got value. I know I love having you on she's gonna be on She's gonna be out of town going to a funeral So you're not going to be online for a few weeks Maybe we can shoot a pre-recorded one All right, wait, wait, wait one more question. I just saw one come in. I was going to wrap up But I want to keep going Question. Do you think most women want a provider type of man? You're a woman I can't speak for most women. I mean, it's ideal to have a provider type of man I think but I Take pride in Being able to take care of myself And I think, you know, like my daughter is the same way Like I think new generation there. Everybody's a lot more independent. So But then there are men that they want to be You know the providers they want. Well, okay, so we have a great we got a mixed bag here You've got some men who have the financial resources to be the provider. Okay They have some men who are devastated after divorce. They want someone that they can partner with in their lives I think some women Instinctually want providers in their life. It's an instinctual thing or maybe it's an egoic thing. They want that But ultimately you can never count on someone. You can only count on yourself. Okay. So with that said, what's most important I believe is being in a position where you don't need to be dependent on anyone for your livelihood That's an important place to be in your life at the same time Two incomes are better than one two assets are better than one So there's a benefit of commingling once you're in that place in your life. However Not to be a drain on the other person either All right, um, thank you for that question. I just wanted to point out someone says stephanie said Marie that color looks great on you. Thank you. What color is that? It's like a fuchsia It matches the flowers. Okay See, thank you for that. Okay. Thank you so much. We're gonna keep going. There's a couple more question How long dates someone you're not interested in? Uh, next well, okay, if you're not interested in someone let me give someone three chances Well, first date sometimes someone could be off. You have a meet and greet I'm like, you know what? But I like some things about them. You see them a second time You like how I like some things about them, but I'm just not interested If by the third time you haven't developed some romantic interest this person That's the time to say next but only say yes if there's some qualities with that person. That's worth exploring. Okay Um, stephanie says you guys are great. Thank you so much Leaf is saying good night. If we've lost leaf at this point, then I think it's time to wrap up Uh Wow Wow folks, uh, wait a minute Folks again, we want to thank you so much. This has been a blast I hope you found value if you want more from a man do these these these six things if you found value Please hit that like button. Please share this video. Please subscribe to my channel You need some support check out the links below to a free discovery call and all the good stuff To learn about my work. All right. I'm gonna wrap up by giving my sweetheart a big gigantic Johnson bear hug Hmm I get one back. Of course Thank you All right, everyone. Have a great evening. Be well by now Oh, I want to thank michelle and genie and deedy and stephanie and our facebook members and alayna and leaf and anita and stephanie and jennifer and roller girl and alayna and sarah I probably it was stars stars starshine A lot of Lisa patricia everyone. Thank you so much. Be well. Bye now. Bye