 Hi, Paras. Thanks so much for joining us today. I'm Steph Lundgren from ESU 8, and we are going to join Sanya Suckup, one of our new licensed mental health practitioners, in session. And she's talking about trauma in the classroom. So we're going to talk a lot about the brain and how it functions and how it responds to trauma. Some of our kids who've lived with a lot of trauma in their lives, and some of our kids who haven't, how all kids deal with that trauma. And then, today, Tammy Cheatham will offer some great tips on self-care, so how to keep you away from trauma, right? So here are Tammy, myself, and Sanya, and our email addresses. As always, we're here for you, and we would love to hear from you, and hear how we can support you better. So if you have anything you need, just let us know. And again, we'll join Sanya in session. Brain. And when I'm explaining the brainstem to children and parents, we talk about the brainstem as being that part of your brain that does all of those things we don't have to think about. So if you can think yourself about the last time that you had to remind yourself to breathe, or remind yourself to digest your food from lunch, it doesn't really exist because our brain does that for us. Thank goodness, right? If we had to do that, remind ourselves, I would have been dead a long time ago. And that's why that that area of our brain exists, is to keep us alive. And you notice down below it also says it's the primitive brain, that being because it's the very first thing to develop. And it's the thing that your brain will always go to when all other things are not working. So when we start talking about what children are like when they've experienced trauma, I want you to remember that that when all else fails, the brain will always go to the most primitive forms, and that is survival. That part of the brain is also responsible for sensory motor input. So when we start talking about understanding our environments, and how our bodies respond to our environments, whether that's the fight with senses, whether that's needs within those senses, that is kind of that secondary development alongside the brainstem. The next thing to develop in the brain, again, the first thing is survival first, we want that to develop. But the second thing to develop is the limbic area of the brain. And the most important thing to know about the limbic brain, when we're talking about children trauma, is it is the part of the brain that deals with activating the fight, flight or freeze mode, which kicks in, do I need to run? Do I need to fight? Or am I so overwhelmed? I don't know what to do. So my body and my brain is going to freeze to try to keep me safe. Coincidentally, the limbic area is also where we experienced those big emotions. This information is going to come in handy later on in the presentation when we talk about the handbrain model in responding to children who just kind of lose it. Chances are that if you are working with a child who has just lost it, they are in their limbic brain. And this is also referred to as the downstairs brain. Another thing that happens in that limbic area is attachment. And that means attachment to people, caregivers, that love and meet needs of children. The final thing to develop in children is the cortical brain. And that is this really, really important part right behind our forehead. I know Tammy and Stephanie have done really great work with executive functioning in promoting that. And when we're talking about executive function, it happens in the cortical brain. So when you're working with a child who can't reason, has inflexible thinking, gets stuck a lot, it means that that cortical brain isn't functioning like you need it to. Sonia, you said something to me the other day when we were talking about all this that really just made sense is that's the part of the brain that we can actually control. Yep. When you think about all of these functions, again, you're really not in charge of what your brain does when you're in danger. But the cortical region of the brain is the one thing that we do have control over. We're not in control of digesting our food. We're not in control of those fight flight freeze responses. But we are in charge of thinking, learning, language, inhibition, impulse control, all of those things, which I think is fascinating. Like the brain truly is the smartest thing ever because it has developed a system for allowing us some control, but then taking over when it gets to be too much. So those kind of basic areas are what we're going to be working with today. And I want to offer, if none of this makes sense to you, I want you to reach out to me and ask questions. I love engaging in conversations with people about the brain and how it works and how that goes hand in hand with education. Because I learned from you, gosh, like 20 years of experience, 30 years of experience, like I need to be talking to you guys because you've seen it, you've seen this happen. So just want to put that out there. If you have questions, please, please, please reach out to me. So the next thing to kind of tackle on top of brain development is that genetics, so what we're born with our DNA, and what we experience are the two factors that influence a child's reactions or responses to trauma, as well as their resiliency to trauma. There was a fascinating documentary that came out not that long ago called Three Identical Strangers, and it talks about how three triplets that were born were separated at birth into three separate foster families or adopted families. And they followed these children until they were 18. And it was crazy how they found out that they were related to one another. But they followed their story. And the whole premise of the documentary was, is it nature or nurture? And at the end, it's left with kind of this idea that it's both. You are born with what you're born with. But also, you are greatly impacted by your environments and how and what and where you experience life. And know that if you have even a set of a brother and sister, and they both experience a traumatic event, being from the same family, both of them can have very separate responses and reactions to the event or whatever has occurred. So that's also important to keep in mind when we are talking about resiliency and helping children recover from trauma. I think that a sort of judgmental thing I hear say, hear people say sometimes is, well, look at that family. That one turned out okay. What the heck happened to this one? You know, and I think we're all unique individuals. And we have to know that we all have different responses. And yeah, we have the same genetics as our siblings. But you know, we're going to respond differently to different situations. So absolutely. And I talk a lot about, I talk a lot about templates too. So as we grow, we all have these memory templates of situations and experiences that prepare us or help us navigate our world. And I have two sisters and our templates couldn't be more different. But we grew up in the same family. So again, it just, it really depends. And I think those are important factors to honor when we're working with children who experience trauma. All right, I'm excited about this. So if there are three names that you would like to write down, if you are, if you're wanting to know more about how trauma impacts the brain or how trauma impacts children, the three names that you need to know are Bruce Perry, Dr. Bruce Perry, Dr. Dan Siegel, and Bessel Van Der Kolk. Dr. Bruce Perry is a neuroscientist. And a while, while ago, I would say maybe like six or seven years ago, I had the privilege of watching him in Lincoln. And he's just incredible in terms of the research and the advocacy that he has done for helping us understand that trauma is, is a brain response to horrible situations. Dr. Dan Siegel, who we're going to watch here, is also a neuroscientist, deeply, deeply embedded in helping others understand how to help children who experience trauma through intervention and understanding the dynamics of the brain. And Bessel Van Der Kolk, he's an incredibly boring guy. I'm sorry to tell you, I tried reading his book and it took so long because his, he just has such a dry writing style. But he has a book called The Body Keep Score. And it helps us understand how trauma is not only working in the memory networks, but also works with our bodies in sensory integration and all kinds of really wild things. If you would like names of books that they've written, let me know. And I can recommend some really great books. So let's watch Dan Siegel here. We're only going to watch a little bit of this. And I will then explain further, because unless you've kind of gotten the rundown of Dan Siegel handbrain model, it might be a little confusing. So we'll watch the video and then I will, I will take a moment to explain further. Hey, Sonny, refresh my memory. Where am I stopping this? I want to stay at four minutes and 30 seconds. Okay. But I will, I will let you know if it's. Thanks. The upstairs brain can control what's happening in the downstairs. That's why it's over top of it. That's why it's over top of it. That's right. Yes. That's the reason it's there. It's actually the reason we can all sit in an auditorium like this for two and a half hours rather than looking for berries or something. So we have this cortex, right? So, so now what happens is if this thing is firing enough, this downstairs brain is firing enough. Here's what happens if fires, fires, fires, fires, and pretty soon it's going to make it so the ability of my upstairs brain to maintain the coordination and balance of the downstairs brain gets a little on the edge and think of the experience of someone hanging off a cliff, right? You're hanging on. You're still hanging on. You're still hanging on. You're still hanging on and you can feel yourself shaking. But what happens when you let go? Yeah, eventually. When you let go, you are going. It's the same way with the upstairs brain. It holds on. It holds on. It holds on. It's holds on. There's a bunch of parents smiling. So you know what's about to happen. This is not always talking about our brains. It's holding on. It's holding on. It's holding on. And suddenly the firing from the downstairs brain is too much. The grip is lost. And watch what happens. This is why it happened so quickly, you guys. This now no longer is coordinating and balancing it. That's the first thing. So now this is now erupts out because it's no longer contained, which turns this way way off. So within two, three seconds, you go from kind of being a reasonable human being to flipping your lips. Okay, so I didn't want to I'm going to go back to it, but I didn't want I just wanted to pause it for a second and say to reinforce that that thumb area he's talking about is that survival mode. So it's when survival keeps having that threat, having that threat, having that, you know, he said that fire, and then that all those parts that you can control just flip. And you can't control anymore. I'm sorry, I really can't stop there. That's actually perfect. So I'm going to do the handbrain model. And I want you all to do it with me. So this is the easiest way that I can remember the brain functions as well. And it's kind of fun. So your wrist right here, this is the brainstem. And again, this is responsible for our survival functions, making sure that our heart is beating, making sure that our blood is pumping, all of those survival functions. Okay, and then we move up into the brain, your thumb right here is that limbic area. And this is where we experience big emotions. And this is where that place in our brain called the amygdala, which is responsible for keeping us safe. I always tell kids, it's like you're brave warrior in your brain, it's constantly scanning for danger and making sure that you're safe. That is where this is located. And then right over top, we have that cortical region, which is the smartest, most logical place in our brain. So to tie this all together, I'm going to give you an example. So I have a nephew and I love him to death. But sometimes when he flips his lid, I go crazy. So I had him staying at my house, and he loves pancakes. And for breakfast, we had pancakes and lots of syrup and all that kind of good stuff. Well, then when it came to be lunchtime, he wanted syrup on his turkey sandwich. And I said no, because that's gross. And then his his little brain, he was he was escalating and I could tell because he was arguing with me, right? And instead of being smart and Sonia and knowing, Oh, he's giving me warning signs, because he's he's on the ledge, his little his little smart part of his brain is kind of slipping, because he's arguing, he's breathing more heavily. Okay, so I still said no. And then boom, lost it. Okay, he was kicking on the floor, he was crying. And he was he was just his limbic area was activated. His downstairs brain was going wild. Okay, now the important thing to know about this is if you're working with a child who has lost their cortical region, they flip their lid, and their limbic area is going wild, do not try to use a cortical region response. So for instance, my little buddy is going wild, because he wants he wants syrup on his turkey sandwich. I'm not going to use a logical, rational reason to help calm him down. I hope that makes sense, because he's flipped his lid, his ability to understand what I'm telling him is gone. So if I want to help him, I'm going to meet crazy with crazy. Okay. So this happened. I realized my mistake. He was kicking and screaming. And so I got down next to the floor with him. I established eye contact. And that's all I did. I stared at him. All while keeping him safe, you know, because when kids kick and flail, they don't care what they take out. Got down to the floor and started staring at him. And then I started doing funny stuff. Because I needed to make sure that his limbic area was connecting with my limbic area. He was angry. I needed to be silly. I needed, I needed to match him in his limbic area. Okay. So then he laughs and he says, yeah, Sonia, you're being silly. Why are you doing that? And then all of a sudden, our lid goes back on, we have calmed down enough and our lid goes back on. And then at that moment, I can have a conversation in saying, buddy, you get to have syrup on your pancakes. But it would not taste good on your turkey sandwich. And I want you to eat good food. And I want you to have a full belly. And then we eat the turkey sandwich without the without the syrup. So the next question is, well, Sonia, how do we know when kids are in this limbic area? And my, my response to that is, you just have to practice, you just have to practice knowing what some of those signs are with your kids. And I'm sure some of you already know, you're like, Oh, I know, I know when their limbic area is going to get wild. I know the signs. And then the next thing you do is on on the screen here, you can see, these are brain based strategies to help children who are struggling. So I have a question for you. So we know younger kids tantrum a lot like that. What would it look like in an older child like a high school or junior high age kid? Oh, yeah, get this all the time. It's, it's refusal to do things. It's getting into arguments with parents. It's being really distant and withdrawn. That's a very common one. And defiance, just blatant defiance. No, I'm not going to do that breaking curfew, those types of things. Another thing to also note about older children is as they get older and their brains develop, their cortical regions are growing also. So they're getting a lot smarter about how they manage their limbic area. So this is where you're going to see, say kids are really struggling emotionally, they're going to engage in more regular, more reckless behavior. So again, I worked with parents before where they'll come into my office and, and like start freaking out because their kids smoked pot and they caught them doing it. And what do we do? And the world is coming to an end. And well, first of all, I have to calm their limbic area. They're so activated. They don't have they don't have the ability to think logically and reasonably about what it was like when they were a teenager. Being a teenager sucks. But we have to calm the limbic area to then get this this rational area of the brain. And then we just talk through things. So I do have to say that the number one predictor of helping children and adolescents and even adults work through this process of getting activated and getting our lid back on is relationship. If you have a close relationship, and if, and if that other person can trust you, you will get through it. You will get through it together. There is resilience through relationship. And the research supports that. So in all of the research that I've ever done in all of the in all of the therapy modalities that we've ever done, they say if a child or person has one safe loving connection in their life, and that person can meet their needs 30% of the time, that child or person will turn out okay. Think about that 30%. That's not very much. But it's important to know that in those moments of struggle, you got to match a mean and where they're at. I cannot tell you how many times I have been working with with a limbic activated downstairs activated child, and parents use their cortical region. And the most common thing I hear is what's wrong? What's wrong? Kids don't know, they don't know what's wrong because they're so activated in their limbic area, the area of their brain that can help tell you isn't even there. Right? How about when parents or teachers say you need to calm down? Yeah, you need to calm down. I with most certainly I can tell you in all of my life of doing this work has never worked ever. It's made it worse. Does anything make you more upset? When you're really upset and somebody tells you to calm down? Calm down. Well, no, it doesn't work that way. Well, and Sonia, you know, like on this whole note of trauma, obviously, we have some kids who might be forced to live in their limbic area a little bit more than others, right? Kids who grow up in homes with chaos or homes with on drug or alcohol abuse or homes with physical abuse and things like that. They're kind of forced into that area longer, their lid is flipped open for a amount of time. Yep. Thanks for bringing that up stuff. So that is such an important thing to note. In the fact that the brain is use dependent, it's a muscle. So think about if you were to go to the gym every single day, and you were to do some dumbbell curls, okay, your arm would get really strong, and you'd get really good at doing dumbbell curls, right? The brain is the same way. It's used dependent, it gets stronger, and more neural connections get stronger where it's used most. So if you have a child living in survival all the time, and they come into your classroom, they will see anything as danger, they will see anything as an opportunity to get what they need. And so I've worked with a lot of kids before, where when they come into my office after experiencing trauma, we can't work in the cortical region. We just can't because they they have very minimal experience of actually being there. Because again, the brain is used dependent if we're in the limbic area, we can't access the cortex until we've calmed the limbic area. If a child has just been in survival mode, like not even getting basic needs met, you're in the brainstem. You're helping children learn how to breathe normally. You're helping them learn state regulation, meaning, let's just calm your body. Let's just help your body know that you're safe and okay here. We can't learn. We cannot learn when we are in the brainstem or the limbic area. Because memory and learning and learning new skills that all happens in the cortex. So Paris, I'm sure that your brain is going nuts with, you know, identifying certain kids that have flipped their lid, right? Do we all know a kid who slipped their lid with us at either at home or at work, you know, and I think about their life and their stimulus and what's happened to them to get to that point. You know, whether it's my very well taken care of nephew, or it's, you know, I worked at a children's home with, you know, foster kids who were removed from home and and they had probably lived in that limbic area for most of their life. So it's just interesting to see, but I'm excited because Sonya has a lot of techniques that we can use with these kids to help them calm back down. So yeah. So before we go into this Lego brain game, which I think we'll help tie it all together for you all. There's just a couple more things that I really want to kind of make note of when we are working with children who've experienced trauma and who may struggle. The number one thing that I've already said is relationship. I have done in the past, something called reflective consultation with teachers, where we simply sit down and explore how that teacher really feels about that child. Because when you have when you're working with a kid who's refusing to work, and says no, and kicks at you and spits at you, it's really hard not to take that personal. It's really hard to not get burnt out. And so having the space to be able to reflect on how that impacts you and be able to continue to build a trusting relationship with children is very imperative. And I mean, some of you that have been doing this for a long time, I'm sure you have your own tips and tricks and ways of being able to build relationships with children. But again, know that that relationship building is the number one factor of building trust and helping these children who have experienced trauma. The second thing to remember is calm is contagious. So I've done a lot of consultation in classrooms before where children are throwing chairs and and just truly escalated. And one thing that I always notice is if the child is throwing chairs and running around the classroom, generally, there's someone following that child. And you walk into the classroom and it feels intense. And it feels scary. And I will challenge teachers when it gets like that, you have to you have to be calm. You have to know that it's your job to keep the child safe. Keep all the other children safe and maintain your calm. Because calm is contagious. We have something in our brain called mirror neurons. There are actually things that help us learn new skills. If you can remember watching watching babies do something for the first time, it's generally they're mimicking what you do. And that's mirror neurons. Well, those never those never go away. And so if you can maintain your calm with a child in their escalated state, eventually, it is contagious. And if you're a really calm person in nature, you may find that people in crisis always come to you. Because they know that you can give them that sense of calm or reassurance. Think about Mr. Rogers. I mean, a lot of press on Mr. Rogers lately, but calm, even keel trustworthy personality. It's what you know, people, people and kids need that. Yes, absolutely. And then finally, my last thing that I really want to kind of just make a note of is that people, people, individuals, you yourself, change people, not programs. I have so often run into this kind of ethical dilemma of when to hug clients and went in that, because that's kind of a, it's a icky, icky weird thing, being a therapist. But the truth is, when someone is struggling, it's only a person that can help that person. It's not a program. It's not a curriculum. It's not, it's not something that you pull out of a binder. It's, it's just a person. And I have seen how hard you all work. And you are those people. So I need you to walk away today, knowing that in the thick of it, when it feels like nothing is going right, you are doing something incredible. And it's people, you changing things. So before we move on to the brain game, are there any questions? Okay. So everyone should have a sheet that looks very similar to the one that's on the screen. And what we're going to do is we're going to reconstruct, oops, I have to turn around, reconstruct the brain. So I have a little helper received that handout. Yeah, I hope so. If you did not, it is in an email to your principal. So just check with your principal and they can get it for you. But for now, we can use the screen too. Yeah. So I had a little helper that was helping me reorganize my Legos, and they changed out one of my green blocks for a yellow one. So this is green. So pretend that this yellow block here is green. All right. So here's the name of the game. I have provided Stephanie and Tammy with a list of adverse childhood experiences, things that would be deemed as traumatic, and also a list of resiliency factors, things that combat trauma. And I have compiled them, and they're kind of in a jumbled list. And what we're going to do is we're going to see if we can build a whole entire brain, see if we can have a resilient brain, based on those experiences. So I earlier today, got a random number generator. And so I'm going to call out the letters and then Stephanie is going to tell us what that experience is, and how many Legos we get to add or take away. So we get to start with the brainstem because we're that's the first thing to develop. And that's guaranteed. Okay. So the first number is 12. Okay, I've heard that when I was an infant, someone in my family enjoyed playing with me, and I enjoyed it too. One Lego added. All right. So as you can see on the screen, we just had a piece of our Diane Cephalon added. We have not talked a lot today about the Diane Cephalon, but it's a really important piece of this. And it's really sensory integration. So kiddos a struggle with sensory integration or those kiddos that never stopped moving in their seat, who are always chewing on their, their coat strings who are constantly covering their ears or seeking out sensory things. So this is the Diane Cephalon. Okay. Next number is six. From infancy, mom had untreated depression. This resulted in disruptive, disrupted attachment in a poor relationship. Zero Legos added. Oh, bummer. So again, relationship and attachment is in the limbic area. And that is very, very, very vital for developing safety in our world is attachment. Okay. Next one is four. Witness domestic violence since age four. It got so bad a neighbor had to call 911 and the police showed up. Zero Legos added. Okay. So they've done research on how domestic violence impacts the brain. And they say that a child witnessing domestic violence of a caregiver loved one is actually worse than them being physically, physically assaulted themselves, which is pretty serious. And so now we've had two adverse effects to the limbic system, right? So yeah, right now we just have a brainstem and part of our Diane Cephalon. All right. Next number is 25. All right. 25 says spend time weekly with a trusted and connected person. One Lego added. All right, our whole Diane Cephalon is together. Yay. I just think that one reminds me of but they got a teammate's mentor at school. Yes. Once a week or they get to see grandma once a week or something. Yep. Okay, next number is 19. Capable and could get things done. One Lego added. All right, guys, we're in our limbic area. This is good news. Next number is two. Left alone in crib. However, when turned eight months started going to daycare and getting these needs met, add one Lego or moving right along. So that one is really important because it talks about how early on not getting any needs met. You're a brainstem. You're not getting anything here because all of the interactions that you need when you're a baby help build these structures. But if you're in a crib all the time, you're just in survival mode. Okay. Next number is two. Oh, we've had that one. That's eight. Eight. When five dad was arrested and then sent to prison for selling meth. Zero Legos added. So not only does that present a risk factor for meth exposure, but it also represents a loss of appearance, which that support system can be vitally important for meeting needs of children. Alright, next one is 14. Neighbors or friends, parents seem to like me. One Lego added. Guys, we have our limbic area. This is good. This is so good. So what this means is, we are now ready to learn. We are ready to go to school. And we might be really, really successful if we can get some of our cortical region on. So number three, little little every time upset. Oh, I might have messed that one up a little maybe a little every time upset a caregiver would yell or one little every time. Okay, when little, every time upset a caregiver would yell for crying zero Legos added. Yeah, because if a caregiver denies your your ability to feel in your limbic area, then you shut down. And nobody's up here making sense of those feelings and what we do with them. And then those patterns continue, right? Because we learn what we learn when we're little, and it follows us forever. Okay, next one is 16. Someone in family cared about how school was going one Lego added. All right, we have some of our cortex now. That's good. Number 30, mom and dad hit frequently in response to behavior they did not like zero Legos added. That one's not good at all. That's no one's helping us make sense or they're teaching us what to do when we don't know what to do. Alright, last one. This is our last chance. Number 28 neglected, exposed to domestic violence, and were sexually abused. Negative three Legos. Oh, guys, we were so close. We no longer have our cortex we're left with just a little bit of our limbic area. So again, this activity was was kind of meant to explore what can happen to the brain with kind of chronic trauma but also the ability of resilience in terms of building back those brain functions when children can get what they need and can resolve those traumatic experiences. So I know what you said about the 30% of times they have their needs met. And heck, kids spend a lot kids spend about 30% of their time at school, right? They do learned their days at school. Yep. And so if we can meet their needs 30% of time. I think that's that's so important to remember. And parents have that one on one time with them. We always emphasize this in the summer with you and your relationships and you get those quiet moments with them one on one. And that they are so lucky to have you in their lives. Yep, I was just having a conversation of the teacher about how school has changed even since I've been in school. When I was in school, school was a place to go and learn. And now I've seen the shift of where school is a place where children go to get their needs met. And that puts a lot of pressure on you all. Because now you're not, you're not just teachers, you're your caretakers. And so I think even just kind of exploring this piece of it of how trauma impacts the brain and and solutions for helping them recover. And hopefully you can see some some resilience in those children. And I, Sonny, can you talk just a little bit about of how to kind of help kids through those areas, some of those intervention pieces that you have? Yep. So on the screen, you can see that each block has some type of strategy or skill in it. So use this as a cheat sheet. Again, this is a pretty rough draft. So as I go along, I'll try to make it prettier. But we look down here at the brainstem. And things that you can do to help regain control of the brainstem are deep breathing, which kids hate. And so my advice to you is if you want kids to calm down, you have to do it with them. And if they refuse to do it with you, it's fine. Just just take some deep breaths. And eventually, hopefully they co-regulate with you, which means that your deep breaths and your calm presence helps calm them as well. Regained control of the heart rate. I carry around a pulse oximeter with me to help kids look and see what their heart is doing. If kids' hearts are above 115 beats per minute, generally they're not in their learning range, they're in their limbic area or brainstem. And so I will like physically get that out and help kids see it. And even just seeing what their heart is doing is sometimes enough to help lower their heart rate and get them to breathing normally. And then also establishing safety. If it has to be you saying you're safe here at school, for kids who don't know what safe is, you have to explain it. You have to let them know what safety is. Then you're in the diencephalon region, again, this is sensory integration. It's offering fidget tools, offering adaptive seating, offering self-regulation strategies. So that being my kind of tip is anything repetitive that kids can do, whether it's chewing gum, walking, jumping, can help bring kids down from an intense state. I had certain students in my classroom, I had a boy who chewed up all the shirts. Instead, we cut up straws, drinking straws, and he could chew on those all day. And also we put some velcro on the underside of his desk. And just that sensory, you know, being able to feel that when he got kind of fidgety and nervous, he could just have that sensation. Yeah, absolutely. Offering calm down strategies. So things that you have seen be successful for other children or even yourself having those available, offering chewing tools like Steph had talked about. And then organization strategies. How do I get my papers organized? Do I need a planner offering those types of things to help role model for kids and get them in the practice of doing it? So again, that limbic area, again, that's our downstairs brain when we lose it, offer co-regulation. Again, regulation is going from a state of I'm not okay to I'm okay. Co-regulation is you do the activity with the child until they're okay. And generally it's something repetitive. It's deep breathing. It's something that you do together. If that's really interesting to you, I have an entire list of things that you can do with kids to help with that. Be present and calm like we talked about support with self regulation. So again, you're doing it with them, but helping them be able to do that on their own, reassure safety, remove triggering stimulus or have student move. So if something in the classroom or the hallway is triggering them, get out of there, move. Because whether you know it or not, they're a little limbic areas firing and they're thinking of ways to get out anyway. So you can go with them and make sure that they're safe. Name the feeling or sensation the student is struggling with. Dan Siegel calls this the name it to tame it principle. And it's if you know a child is feeling anxious, and you say, I wonder if you're feeling kind of anxious or nervous. I see you kind of moving around and how your heartbeat is really fast. Sometimes even helping kids identify their feelings helps calm them down and get them back into that cortical region. So now we're up to the cortex. This is the crux of what you guys do every single day. So it's helping support develop impulse control. This is I see this happen a lot. I see this happen a lot where kids come in and they just have their impulse control is not existing. So it's giving them opportunities to know that they're being impulsive and try again. All right. Okay, try that again. Remember you're being a little impulsive right now. Let's try to slow down and do it this way. Flexible thinking being told no, and I can be okay. Not things not going their way. And I can be okay. Practicing working memory learning new skills reading. You guys do that on a daily basis. Supporting development of problem solving skills. I was just reading some research on problem solving and they say if preschoolers can come out of their learning and knowing their emotions, problem solving and how to navigate difficult situations, that probably be all right. We'll turn out okay. Rational thinking practicing that over and over and over. And then the last two, these are so so important is positive descriptive praise and encouragement. So you can say good job, but you can also say excellent work on that writing assignment. Because their brain stores that in a very different area. And it's a motivator because the brain remembers that the next time it goes to to writing, like, Oh, that felt really good last time. Let's do it again. And the more positive descriptive praise you give, the better and more improvement you'll see in those kind of negative behaviors that may be exhibited, related to whatever that the issue is. So those are just some strategies in that shell. If anything on here pops out to you and you're like, Oh, I want to know more about that. Please let me know. And I will get you resources or shoot you videos or whatever I can do to help expand your knowledge of that because I want you guys to find this useful and helpful. I'm sure I've ate up all my time. Thank you so much, Sonia. I just think we want to keep learning from you because you're just a wealth of knowledge. So we're probably going to just book you for August right now. Cool. We want to know more. So I think that our hearts go out to kids who have looked through traumatic situations and for kids who maybe haven't, but are having trouble with certain areas and flipping their lives a little too much, right? So we can help all those kids in Paris. You're so awesome for doing that job every day. So Tammy's going to give you some tips on self care now so that you don't flip your lid when working with kids. Buzz out because I have a three o'clock kiddo. Again, if you guys have any questions, please feel free to contact me. Thank you so much, Sonia. Bye. Okay. So what I had again goes along with what Sonia was saying with that calming down and that's what I was thinking about. You know, if you just remain calm and I think too, like when she says when they're freaking out and when you can maybe do something silly, you know, and so I thought that's Spider-Man breathing. You know, regular breathing is fine, but I think if you make it like it looks silly a little bit, that Spider-Man breathing was that, you know, you breathe in and breathe out with your hands. You're throwing that web. The Spider-Man breathing because I think that will get kids attention and you're still being remaining calm. The butterfly breathing is when you spread your arms out, you breathe in, in and out. Again, I think kids will, they'll catch their attention because they're used to just that deep breathing, but this is a little bit different. And the alligator when you breathe in, opening your hands like it out of your mouth and out. So I just picked those three to make sure that you can do that too. Again, when you're trying to get kids to calm down for you. And again, it helps you. And I thought around, again, around this time of the year, when it gets crazy hectic for adults and for kids. But again, mine's more focused on you as well. That, you know, when you think about Rachel and friends of any of you who watch that, you know, why is everything always happened to me? I think sometimes we can get in that frame of mind where things aren't going right. So, you know, just take a little piece of paper or take sticky notes, write down, you know, make a list of the complaints, little stuff and big stuff. You know, if it's whether this weather is crummy, you know, all weekend when we had the crazy weather with Thanksgiving, you know, write that down. Whether it be, you know, something happened that you broke your heel in your shoe or something as big as, you know, a parent or somebody had a stroke. So I think write down all those lists as a complaints and it's fine to have that. So that way it's there, you acknowledge it, and it's over to the side. Then I think it's important to remember, again, the bull's eye. And this helps you to remember that inside most circle is what you can control. Okay, you can only control you. Okay, you can't control other people as much as we want to. I think that goes along with those kiddos when they get to be out of control. Again, you can only control what you're doing and how you react. Again, then the next ring on the outside is what you can influence on what you can go ahead and influence. The next thing is everything else is outside of your control and the influence. Then I think it's important to remember that four principles to help manage that change, you know, slow down, take a minute just to slow down, evaluate, maybe analyze that situation, you know, find the good and the bad in that. And use your energy where it counts, you know, if right now your energy is to be with your family member because there's something going on there, then, you know, think about that, take time to honor that and to give your energy there. And, you know, be open to outcomes. Oh, I see I have five things there. I think it's right there. I'll get that changed. Be open to the outcomes, you know, whether it be good or bad. Share it with somebody else, you know, find that work companion that you can do it with or your significant other, a good coworker, be something like that. So I just always want to give little tips for self-care because it's important to take care of you. If you can't help kids, then they don't benefit from that. So that's really important to focus on those things. And especially this time of year, I think I saw something on Facebook the other day that said steps to surviving teaching in December. Number one, peel the kids off the ceiling. Number two, repeat. So the kids get a little antsy, we get a little burnt out. And so it's important to remember to just take care of yourself, slow down, do these things. And, you know, just to make you your best self for the kids too. And then I did go and I one time I think I gave you a list of apps and so it's just easy to throw that out there. But I did actually go and download this one. Stop, breathe and think. It's on, I have an Apple phone so it was on the App Store. You can also get it in Google Play. And right now it looks like it's free to me. I've been using it a little bit and it just has you go answer some things and then I give you different quick trip tips. And even if you take five minutes a day to do this, you can do something on your phone because again, we have that with us. So I just put this on there because I think it's a really good app and right now it is free. So it's just something to help you maybe just do a quick check in just to kind of keep yourself in true to what you're what you want to commit to and about being doing self care. And the other one, oh, I didn't put that in the other one up there at the calm right here. If you click on that it'll take you out just to a website. I did find out that you can try it out for 30 days for free. So again, it just it talks about doing certain music, different meditation type things, you know, and I'm not a big meditator. So I go for more of the breathing type things and listening to calm music. So I'm not trying to promote anything that you know, have you just say answer or anything like that. But it's just these are two ones that I've been trying out. And so I'm trying this for 30 days and I haven't found it yet what the price will be. But again, I'm not advocating anything. I just think do something that's free and for you. And I have to say I'm I'm a I'm the meditator one because I've been accused of having a monkey mind in my life. And one time my mom said, well, just stop thinking. And I looked at her and I said, how is that possible? And I didn't even it didn't ever even occur to me to stop thinking because my mind was always running. So that kind of thing has really been a benefit in my life. So so thank you, Tammy, for those tips. We want to remind you that all of our resources are here at the pairs of ESU eight website. This is a link here and you'll be able to go to the zoom link. And from today's recording and also get get our presentation, get email addresses and that kind of thing. Get the agenda for the year. And we'll see you on February 4th. Holy cow, that seems like so far away. And we're going to work with Heidi Rethmeyer on assisting with the inquiry based science that is new to our schools and our state and how to assist kids when they're really supposed to be figuring things out for themselves. So we just want to say have a very merry Christmas and draw your family. Enjoy your break. Holy cow about two weeks off this year. Are you ready for it? I think we are. So just enjoy. Thank you so much for being here with us, Paris. You guys are just awesome. Thank you. See you.