 Hey, Psych2Goers, welcome back to our channel. Your support helps Psych2Go and our goal to spread awareness about mental health and psychology. So, thank you. Now, to the video. You are unconditionally and irrevocably in love. Not with a vampire. But how do you know if you're mistaking your attention and desire for someone as love? Maybe without realizing it, you're only focusing on your needs and fulfillments. Perhaps it's not true love after all, but a selfish relationship with so-called selfish love. Well, whether you think your partner is the culprit or you suspect you may possess selfish tendencies, here are six signs of selfish love to help you out. Number one, they talk over you. Does your partner constantly interrupt you? Do they often talk over you while you're in the middle of explaining something? A partner who is self-centered won't bother in getting to understand your point of view. According to psychologist and couples therapist Deborah Campbell, in a discussion, when you disagree, your partner is more concerned with defending her position than acknowledging your point of view. Feeling heard is a vital part of feeling loved. So, the result is usually to feel emotionally sidelined when a partner consistently doesn't listen well. Number two, they don't ask about you or your day. Hmm, so your partner often loves to talk about their troubles and joys. But when it comes time for a you to vent, they're simply uninterested or don't even bother to ask. They don't even ask how your day was when you arrive home from work. It's important that both couples in a relationship take the time and energy to listen to each other. And that means asking how they are, so they have someone to turn to if something is on their mind. If instead they dominate the conversation, that's a red flag. Pay attention to see if your partner asks about you and your feelings. And if you recognize you aren't doing that, it's never too late to start practicing showing your empathy and speaking kindness. Number three, it's always their way. When you and your partner discuss things to do or important decisions, it's always their way or the highway. You may not realize this is happening too. You could think it's a fair discussion about where to go eat or what friends to invite over. But at the end, nearly every decision, they conquer. All you wanted to do was invite some friends out for Taco Tuesday. But instead, it's a pizza party with his friends. Do you often have to beg them to do things you want? Hang out with your friends, visit your family this time? There should be equality and a healthy balance in any relationship. Otherwise, you may resent them. Pay attention to how often your choices or opinions are heard. Do you eat tacos more often or pizza? Number four, they control you with their rules. They are always the one making the rules, but never following them. It can be healthy to set boundaries in a relationship, but if you notice your partners often breaking those boundaries and giving out orders, this is only toxic behavior. Many individuals with narcissistic personalities will have high expectations for others. If those expectations aren't met, they can judge you harshly. Often, when a narcissist wants their partner to meet their expectations, they'll set rules. They'll demand you take certain steps in the relationship, but then they go off and ignore the rules for themselves. Number five, they don't listen to your opinion. Couples in a relationship need to think as a team. They're in this together, but if you notice your partner never takes your opinion or point of view into account, you could be caught in a one-sided relationship. To them, they're always right, while you're always in the wrong, and they may even make you believe this all the time. If they always valued their opinion over yours, it's best to reevaluate your relationship. They may just have a selfish love for you. And number six, they're always taking, but never giving much back. It's Valentine's Day. You put the most thought into your gift for your partner. They had briefly mentioned that they'd take you somewhere special, and you want to make sure you show your appreciation by giving them a present that's thoughtful and something they'll enjoy. They finish unwrapping their gift and you reach out your hands, eyes closed, for yours as the smile spreads across your face. Oh, uh, I forgot. They say sheepishly, but it's Valentine's Day. And you reminded them last month and last weekend yesterday. And that romantic destination they said they'd take you to? McDonald's. Drive-thru. Although their burgers and fries are delicious, but they didn't even think of you. If your partner is always taking while you're the only one putting forth the effort, you likely have a problem. It doesn't even need to be Valentine's Day presents. If you often give your attention and energy to them and they don't do the same, well, it looks like their love for you may just be selfish. If you find yourself caught up in a one-sided relationship, there are some steps you can take. Selfish partners often don't like to be confronted and can get defensive quickly. So if discussing these issues calmly doesn't work, here are some other tips. Invest your energy into other areas of your life, not just towards them. If you find your love for them is still strong, take time to think and recognize whether you actually love them or if you desire them in a different way. Perhaps you've developed an obsession with other ways they make you feel. They could also be doing the same. Or maybe you're only in love with the idea of them rather than who they truly are. If you decide to continue the relationship, when you talk with them, bring out their strengths and discuss their insecurities. They may be due to insecurities they may possess. But if you know you are truly unhappy, or if you're not in love after all, it's best to think about what's best for you. Perhaps you should break off the relationship and instead find someone who focuses on your needs as well. Trust me, that's not selfish. So, do you relate to any of these signs? Are you a little selfish in your relationship? Or do you suspect your partner may be? Which signs do you relate to? Share with us in the comments. If you found this video helpful, don't forget to click the like button and share this video with someone who might need it. Subscribe to Psych2Go and hit the notification bell icon for more content like this. And as always, thanks for watching.