 Welcome to This Sister 2 Sister. It is going to be a great show. We have a question that goes like this. The end of the world as we know it. There's a song about that and also money, money, money. How do I help my adult child with money? Do I, do I not? And what if I need to break up with a friend? I'm not breaking up with you, ever. Ever. Stay tuned. Hello and welcome to Sister 2 Sister. We are so glad that you've joined us. We are five opinionated women and we bring the questions and problems of the world to you with answers from our heart, mostly from the Bible. So you send us questions all the time and we really respect that and admire and need those questions. But this one is very interesting. Hear what we have to say. Oh, oh, Roxanne, I'm going to come to you. This is, this is for you. What is the one thing that is destroying the world as we know it? You know, as soon as I read this, I thought of James 1. The anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God. And since the beginning of the human race, Cain and Abel, Cain killed his brother Abel who was a righteous person. Cain did not repent. His anger, his jealousy rose up to murder and they were so close to God and His will, yet they allowed their emotions to get the best of them. So it starts with an individual. It starts in the heart and mind. It's not just nations. It's not just groups of people, but you, a person, we individually need to take responsibility for that emotion anger. So anger is destroying the world as we know it. That's how I feel. Individually and personally, and it begins there. Well, I didn't have anything about emotions. I had, this is what destroying the world, cell phones. But we all have them. We all use them. But I'm serious. Cell phones and social media destroying the world. So you're getting rid of yours? Do you see mine? No, no, no. I'm the only one here without a cell phone because I'm technologically inept in the group. What do you think? I was thinking about, you know, we just came off a week where, you know, the state of the union address, which was a political thing or the Grammys, which is media music thing in the arts industry. And I thought, boy, I could just pick out about anything and say that's destroying the things that we're seeing, the things that we're listening to, the divisions politically. But then I thought what I think is really destroying our country is the lack of value for life. Damn. Unborn lives, other people's lives, people that are different than you's lives, the sexual exploitation of girls and boys' lives, the, you know, puberty blockers for a third grader, that's a lack of a value of life. And I think that if we don't value life, where do we go from there? I like that. What do you have, wisdom of flow? I was just, I was really wanting to hear what my quarry had to say first. Okay, we'll all go to quarry first. Okay. Quarry. Well, I took it back further from Cain and Abel, back to Adam and Eve. Oh. Because I was just trying to think, I'm like, what is it? And I think it's the same thing from the beginning of time. What is destroying the world today is the same thing that has just been destroying the world since the perfection of Garden of Eden and it's sin. Sin is what is destroying the world today. Now, sin looks different than it looked back then, but ultimately it's the same, you know? It just takes on a different form. And sin is what continues to change the world. Now, Satan knows that, so he exploits that and he uses tools that are neutral like the cell phone. This cell phone is not sinful. This cell phone is neither good nor bad. It's how it's used. And so Satan takes that as a tool and says, how can that be used? And that's when it becomes sinful and how it's used, so. Okay. Well, do you have anything to piggyback your sister? Yeah, off of all of my sisters, you know? And I was taking notes as they were talking, you know? Cory, of course, talked about sin and Roxy so eloquently addressed us about anger and being mad, and of course, I'll admit your name and went on my head. I'm sorry, I'm on Benadryl Zertec, y'all. I can't fake it, okay? That's Amy. Amy? I'm sorry. Just wait, a zoop? I'm like, can't fake it. And Amy needs some. I'm back, I'm back. She's back, okay. So, the lack of value of life. But for me, it all boils down to, I can put all these together and say this whole thing about your truth, you know, my truth, my truth. Versus the truth. And so, I wanna leave us with that and just the fact that let's spend a little more time on being concerned about being spiritually prepared for the time that's coming. Cause there will be a time that we are not gonna be here and the world will come to an end, one way or another. Whether it's as you know it, like I knew it from back in whatever year, somebody knew it back in the 20s, the way somebody knew it growing up in the 50s, 60s, 70s, go on, that's chronologically. But there is an eternity piece to this. And I'd rather spend my time focusing on being prepared for that. And I have hope and having hope in the Lord. So this question, here's another question, this is gonna be really good. How do, I'm not crazy about this one, but how do I gracefully accept a rebuke when I don't believe it's true? So I Googled the dictionary for rebuke and it says stern, sharp, disapproval, reprimand. I have none of those in my vocab. Corey, what do you say? Gracefully accept it, I would never rebuke you. Oh gosh. How do I or how should I? How should you? Okay, well. Okay. Yeah. Do you get rebuke? Oh my gosh. I mean, I try to put off vibes so that I don't get rebuke. Yeah, come on. But I, how I want to is get the behind me Satan. Okay. If I'm being honest, this is a weakness in me. Okay, I am not good at taking rebuke or criticism or any, and especially when I don't think that it's true, this is really hard for me to be gracious about it. Like, have you ever seen the gift with the guy who just blinks and he just like is like that, that is my response. I'm just like, okay. But in Stephen Covey, some, the seven habits of a highly, yeah, highly, Successful. Effective people. Number five is seek first to understand and then to be understood. And so I think that's the best way to handle it when someone is rebuking you and you don't think it's true. It's like, okay, let me try to understand where they're coming from with this. Then try to be understood. Cause I think so often we jump to, no, no, no, you don't understand me and the defensiveness. Let's understand where they're coming from first. Cause maybe they're hurt, maybe they're offended, maybe something has happened. So let's understand where they're coming from first. Then come to the understanding. I think where we always need to go is the wisdom of Proverbs when it, you know, we're looking at these things. So Proverbs 18 to fools find no pleasure in understanding but delight in airing their own opinions. Okay. So that, I mean, that's me. Like I'm always like, I need to get my opinion out there. I need to, you know, I need to air this. Then the opposite Proverbs 16, 24, gracious words are a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing to the bones. So let me use my gracious words. These are two Proverbs I need to remind myself. So who else has rebuked? I'm in a different place where I'm almost constantly receiving corrections and I'm continually giving corrections. It's what we have to do as a growing church, growing leadership. If we don't correct and change, it could hurt a lot of people, including myself. If I don't correct the change. So I have people I'm always asking, I'm like an open book. Please tell me what I need to do to change. So what we, what we have taught our staff and it's really hard is that if we're all having a discussion like this, right? Kind of picture yourself with your hands, palms up under the table, kind of like I'm listening and I'm open and I'm hearing. It's not like I just shut everything down and get defensive. That's so easy to do. That's our flesh nature. I mean, we're just like, don't ever think about me like, don't ever correct. But what if reproofs and corrections were a way of life? Just like we love our kids. We correct and not to hurt them, but to help them. Maybe you foresee something or that's something that's really hindering their life. So anyway, that's my quick take. I'm blessed by both perspectives because they're needed. And you know, my key word is always balance. And I really believe that the whole aim of rebuke is not to shame or embarrass or to undermine. In 1st Corinthians 16 and 14, reminds us that everything should be done in love. And he talks about especially rebuke. And rebuke is a necessary part of our growth. He who the father loves, he chasens, right? And truth heals. So I think it is the way that, it's just like when we talk about criticism, we usually associate it with something negative, being condescending, being, but there's nothing, but we critique stuff every day. You critiqued your outfit before you came out. We critiqued our makeup. We critiqued, you know? So it doesn't have to be something negative. It can always be for the better, but it's how the person who is receiving it, hopefully it has been done in such love, the person giving it, that they are able to receive it. And I know that there have been times that I've gotten rebuked, and I'm not gonna lie. I didn't, it's not like I did some cartwheels and oh, thank you, I'm running around. You know what I mean? There are times that I've heard it and went, I don't know about that or she got her own issues or he needs to deal with this. Only to go back into my quiet time with the Lord and have him put his finger on it. And sometimes it wasn't always right away, Roxy. It might have been months or even years later. It's like, I guess I do have an issue with that. Well, I just, I'm gonna move on to the next question, but I just wanna say one thing. Do not rebuke someone unless you're asked for your opinion. I'm just saying. Okay, this question is really good. I'm not about rebuking. Can you tell? Okay, this question is so good. I wanted to get to this for you. Someone wrote this, I may have told my adult son we could help him with his finances, but my husband is against it. Now, I'm really in trouble. Someone's gonna be mad. What should I do? This is called money, money, money. What should I do? I was thinking, I don't help my adult daughter with money, so I'm not sure I would help my adult son either. This totally depends on the situation. There are situations and times and seasons where an adult child will need your help. I mean, probably, I remember needing help at one point in my life at probably every adult child. Now, how long is that commitment? How much is that commitment? How dependent is that commitment upon me and am I hurting them or helping them? Because the goal is that you have independent children that contribute back to society and life. So, I made some hard decisions this year with Christmas and birthdays, and my kids are not happy about it, and I could care less. I'm thinking right now about retirement, I'm thinking about our future, and they're like, mom, our life is over. Jude is like, well, what's my budget for my birthday? I'm like, your budget for your birthday? Let me just tell you how much I've changed, and he was like, oh my gosh, mom. It's just, they have these huge expectations. And I said, you believe God for that, you on your own, develop your own faith for that. I want to go to you because you have five children. Yes, yes. How do you feel about this? You know, what hit me about this question is your husband is against it, and somebody's going to be mad at me. You know, are you manipulated by circumstances? By your son's failure to do what he needs to do, and your husband's failure to listen to your counsel? You know, the scripture says, I think it's James, that wisdom is reasonable, easy to be entreated, full of mercy and good works. You three got to come together and learn how to resolve issues. Not just money, but issues as well. And I would say yes, as Amy said, everybody needs help at some time. That's why you're called a parent. But do it in unison, you know, try to do it in unison, make your arguments. I'm glad she didn't just count out to her husband's like, oh, you're against it, so forget it. You know, she has to make her plea and her reasons why, and not worry about who is going to be mad at her. Well, you're shaking your head. I mean, there are so many issues here. We could talk about this for an entire show. Okay, well, this needs to be a discussion with the husband, okay, and they need to have a unified front. And I am sorry, but financially, helping your child does not mean supporting them financially. Helping them means not enabling them in that way and saying, yeah, here's my wallet, open it up to you. If you need a place to live, you have a roof over your head, you have food on the table beyond that, you need to figure this out. Like that is helping your child by cutting them off and saying, no, the financial flow stops here. I'm sorry, but that is not helping your child by opening your wallet to them. Well, to you that wrote to us, we appreciate you writing and just remember this, it is, and I'm looking stuff up in my scripture too. It's Matthew 12, 25, a house divided will fall. So get together and you stay right there and we'll be together to bring you more sister to sister. The here we go. This is really crazy. Whoever wrote this, how do I break up with a friend? What? Cory, what does that even mean? Okay, I've actually heard this before. I think, you know, certain friendships get so deep where you are spending so much time together and you just have such a deep friendships and something happens where there just is a breaking of the friendship, okay? Where something happens and there's this need where you feel like you have to like discuss like where there's this ending. I don't agree with that. I do not think you break up in a friendship. There are seasons and cycles to friendships. Friendships are not a covenant relationship like a marriage. And I think sometimes people put those friendships on a pedestal even higher than their marriages. And I think that's a problem. I really do. And so I don't, I don't agree with the whole breaking up and sitting down and saying, oh, we're breaking this off. There's seasons and cycles. And you know what? You never know if that's gonna come back around where you're gonna have a different season and you're gonna have a different relationship. And yeah, you might not be spending as much time together now, but maybe later you will. I just don't agree with the whole breaking up thing. Do I think you should communicate if there's an issue? Yes, breaking up, no. Well, do you have a scripture for it? Well, I kind of do in this way. Is the person a bad influence in a weak area? Cause the scripture says stay away because you will be drawn to that weak area also. So I think you need to speak the truth and love. If that friend is going down a path that's gonna be a bad influence, you need to speak the truth and love and tell them, look, you're not a good influence right now, but I will always love you. I will always be there, but I can't spend that time. Or is iron sharpening iron? Amen, amen. Is that person saying things to you, as you said before, that you don't wanna hear, but you need to hear because the word says, life giving reproof, rebuke, brings life, brings wisdom. Is that friend doing something that causes you alarm? But it's good for you, it's bringing life into you. But do you say that to them? Do you say, I really can't spend time with you because you're making me make bad decisions. I just feel like, I don't know. To me, that's like, but if you love your friend, you're gonna rescue them from doing something wrong if they're truly your friend. I mean, I guess it depends on the relationship. We gotta have to keep in mind. I mean, you both bring a good point. I'm a little more leaning towards Roxy because that's my personality. I'm gonna talk with you. We're gonna have that conversation because I take friendship very intimately. See, there's a difference between acquaintance and friendship and to the point of covenant, just humbly suggest the studying out of the scripture because there are covenant relationships outside of marriage, such as Jonathan and David to give you one. So it's identifying what this friendship or relationship is. Some are for a season, as we hear them say. Some are for a lifetime. One of the things one of my pastors taught me is healthy things grow, growing things change. What I've found in my true friends and think about it, those people that you have become, they might, it might be somebody from elementary school. They went their path, you went yours, but there's still that connection. I still, I have one friend that comes to mind right now and going to school together, we both got married, went off and had our children, kind of lost contact, but yet still any momentous occasion in my life, anything, she's there, you know. And so that to me is just, that's a true friend. Now I have some people who are just acquaintances and yeah, they can kind of fall more in that category. But I think any relationship that is toxic, you need to take a look at. Can I ask you something while I have your attention? Okay, because I wanna get to this question. Okay, good. I wanna get to this last question because. Oh, by the way, this is Kathy. Thank you. This is a really important question so I didn't want to gloss over it and I do want your wisdom on it. Does God wait for us to pray to make things happen and move in our lives? This is a really good question. Oh, but I am so grateful we're having this question because you know, the word of God says, what about his house? My house shall be called what? A house of prophecy. A house of worship. A house, he says, a house of prayer. But what is the thing that we do the least in church? Think about your Sunday service. How much time is really given to prayer? So why did I start with that? Because when you think about how prayer works and why God set it up, it is to legislate the heavens. What did he teach us in the Lord's Prayer? That what's in heaven would be manifested, we're here on earth. How does it get manifested? I must take dominion, all dominion in Genesis 21, I mean, Genesis 1, 26, 28. I have dominion. There's a way that God cannot, can he do it by way of his power and all of that? Absolutely. Will he do it by way of his character? He can't because he gave that to me. So what's in heaven? As a believer, I must legislate the heavens and bring it here on earth so that it can be manifested. You were talking about Daniel earlier. I can't wrap it up real fast. You were talking about Daniel earlier and I thought it was excellent because you talked about how Daniel prayed and the answer was released that day. So we're not talking about philosophies and what we think about stuff. What is the biblical answer to this question? Yes, I believe that when I work in conjunction with God, that brings to manifestation. Now timing is a whole another thing. That's right, that's right. Pastor, what do you tell your people? I do, to piggyback off of you, I heard a quote and it's from some famous evangelist that God can do nothing except man pray. So there's something about ask and it will be given to you. Seek and you're gonna find, knock and it shall be opened. It's like, whosoever shall say into this mountain be thou removed. So there is a level of, if God was going to do whatever he wanted to do, the whole world would be saved, the whole church would be tithers and givers. Everyone would be healed. There's an element of we're his kingdom, kids on earth saying thy kingdom come, thy will be done. And we're bringing it from heaven to earth through our prayers, through our request and through our asking. So I would say be relentless with your prayers but not like in fear, but in faith. Believe God for that kid, for your finances, for your health and you just hang on like a dog would hang on to a bone and don't let go. Right and I know that Roxy probably has a scripture for us on this but I do too. So I'm gonna give it to you right now cause it's really, really important. And it's in Luke 18, one day Jesus told his disciples a story to illustrate their need for constant prayer and to show them they must keep praying until the answer comes. And it's the story of the lady that goes to the judge. Help me, help me, help me. The judge said, ah, just do whatever she wants. So people say you don't need a laundry list of prayers but God needs to hear from your heart on a regular basis. And stay right there. We're glad that you're hearing from us. We can't stop talking. We all have answers on top of answers and opinions on top of opinions. I wish you were sitting at the table and we could hear your thoughts on some of these questions. We always like to end sister to sister with the scripture. Thank the Lord. Today it is from Hebrews 4.16. Let us then approach God's throne of grace with confidence so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need. Listen, whether it's dealing with money and your kids and finances, maybe it's with friendships and do I break up or do I need boundaries or it's in a marriage or life? We need mercy, we need grace and he is our very present help in time of need. So if you need help today, if you need prayer today will you give us a call at 888-665-4483. We're here for you. We'd love to pray and really hook up our faith and believe God with you. Oh, that was so good, Amy. And we have another scripture we end with all the time and it goes like this, as iron sharpens iron. So does the countenance of a man or a woman or a sister sharpen the other. You see family, these girls make me a better Kathy. See you next time.