 Oh my god. Oh my fucking god. Loading up the game is Is it an ordeal? It's an ordeal. There's little boob jiggles Let's get right Oh my god. Why are you looking at me like that? Jesus Oh no, when you turn his head kind of follows you Yeah, but jiggle him around you can see his nipples just Slightly wiggle Also this guy has a chafe marks under his armpits My guy's changing this This little dance Oh he does have weird chafe marks Incredulous Pouty Oh, double pouty I like incredulousness I just wanna do this I don't wanna actually play the game Let's jump into it Alright Oh, here we go Okay, here we go Oh my god You just explode into it Hey dude I don't know how to do anything What are they gonna do? How do you do anything? Whoa Holy shit How do you do anything? I have a rock, come here Hold on, how do I throw? Wait, can I do it? All I know how to do is pick it up and put it down He's not How did you do it? You have to hold it Oh, you have to hold it, okay I love how we just explode out of rocks Where did you, where did you spawn? I'm right behind you Shit, shit, shit Oh, yeah, it spins around I can't do it too Yes Oh, this is good Come here Let me punch you real quick Is this what the whole thing is? This is the entire game? Wait, wait, wait Let's see who can hit each other from the other side of the map Okay Okay, I need to pick up a rock Don't try it on again I got one foot up like a power pose right now Hit me, come on, hit me You just slightly moved your body up Punch All right Boy, you want that punch? Here Oh, yeah That's what the punch is about, baby Sweet, tasty cheeks There we go I want to be able to grab it I remember sandwiches I remember sandwiches in big rocks And shaved armpits Give me that thumb I want it Ow I think so Here I am, bitch Where? Where are you? Oh, there you is I came back out of the ether You've only got 40 seconds left to save the world Grab a boy and grab a girl Oh, you're so sad This is my fate Oh, no! 30 seconds left I've got so much reach I'm about to... This is my fate What face do you have? Do you have a pouty face? I have a pouty face I want a bottle, but mom's not listening Oh, mom Whoa That's what you get Oh, it's a draw Bummer, dude, I really thought I had that one I feel like I whooped ass in that one Oh, wait I'm not against you anymore I just fought somebody I'm fighting somebody else I'm fighting somebody else He has the icon of the puffer fish That's being force fed a carrot And then they kill him Alright My guy has a Metro Exodus picture It's a lot less intense Yes! Did you fuck him up? I fucked up my guy once already I fucked him up Dude, I fucked him up Eat shit, bitch These rocks be hitting different I was standing behind my guy And he didn't see me And I just fucking put my hand out so fast And just grabbed his neck I was about to be like, should we back out And just fight each other But I feel like it doesn't even matter Nothing matters Nothing matters We're all gonna die anyway Is this the entire game? I don't know, I'm fucking this dude up It's 4-1 right now So good Yeah, mine's 3-2 3-2 nothing right now This guy's terrible Come on, dude I thought you were a fucking gamer Come on On gamers? Oh, yes I'm 7-1 right now Oh my god This guy He mined as well Who is dead anymore? Is that why he has a pouty face? I don't, where are my dad? Where are my dad? Oop I think my guy backed out I'm the winner This is a great game This is the best game Are you fucking kidding me? I lost? How did you lose? I hit him 10 times He hit me once Then it's sudden death I beat the shit out of him He hits me once and I die You know, that's kind of life, dude You know No, it's not, life is bullshit Are we? Okay, what up? What up? Oh shit, dude Exploring out of Aurora This is how baby's made Oh, hell yeah Got him Fucking downtown Can we go all the way up the mountain? No Are we sparring? Are we dueling? And what is the difference? We're wasting our time Yeah, this is all I hope this is what Heaven's like Just big song wearing men fighting each other Just running around I hope this is what I get reincarnated in Come here You can't catch me You and your fucking angry face Just chasing me around Two naked men chasing each other How do I kill you? I don't know how to do anything Come here, come here, come here Oh, there he is What? Bye bye Oh no God, I love it I love it I spawned it and it was like wrong way This is game of the year for sure Stay there Yeah Put the mountain on, you can get me Okay Oh wait, I am on the mountain I'm the rock on the mountain Can I emote or something? I want to be able to be like hey Yeah, right? Okay, all right Yeah Yeah This is what it's all about My training is complete This is all this forearm training was for Wait Oh shit Wait, let's see if we can hit each other At the same time All right, ready? You go all the way up there I'll go all the way down here God, the camera is just like Okay Okay All right, ready? And we Okay, three, two, one and then we hold Okay, ready? Okay, three, two, one, hold Oh Yeah That was sweet I love how he spins into it Oh, it's so good Yeah Get some real fucking reverse momentum going Come here Your back is so red Yeah, they've been taking fucking rocks to it, dude Come here Oh, pups All right, there you go Next, let's go sports There you go That's how we do it Isla, bitch This is what it means to be isla This is what it means to be Green, white, gold Hit me Hit me Hit me Green, white, gold All I'm hitting is that fat block, dude Oh, salt, dude Oh, so close Oh, my God, that was close See those dukes? I'm breaking ankles over here, dude Look at how fast I can move You're such a big sweaty baby Certain death, dude Look how fast I'm going, dude You ready? This is where the speed really picks up Going downhill Watch this Whoa I can do it, too I can do it, too This is better than the last season of Game of Thrones Oh, yeah, it is Oh, you have a blue one now Yeah You have a blue This is a fucking running animation yet What up, what up, what up Okay, hold on, wait Can you throw bolt rocks at the same time? Nope What happens if you pick up the rock that I become Like, kill me and then I'll quickly tell you what rock I am I don't, I've just realized Okay, okay, okay Uh, the rock that I am Is over, oh, yes Oh There, there, there, buddy There, there Friends Friends forever I've found my thumbnail Oh, it's all in Yeah, you died There you go You're the good You're the big man You're the good one Oh, you Dude, dude It wasn't worth it, bro Hey, stop back I love that we just You Hey, she's not worth it, bro Back off, bro Back up This game is incredible I really doubted the quality of it for a while God It's worth it This is so worth it 30 seconds left What do we do? Okay, yeah, we'll try a kiss Here I am Coming in Oh, I missed you I'm sorry I didn't mean to Kiss me too hard, bro I also realized that there's no I've been clicking to try and punch you That doesn't do anything You just punch automatically When you get close to each other Wait, come kiss Happy New Year Happy New Year Happy New Year This is a draw I think that's it Thank you For watching us play a game We had no idea what it was And then it turned out to be Even worse than that It turned out to be One of the best things I've ever played It gave me one of the biggest laughs That I've had in a long time So thank you, Ponch Thanks, Ponch Save our marriage