 Love is beautiful, but love alone cannot sustain a relationship. Being in a relationship with someone is a choice, and with such a decision comes commitment. Most couples never realize how unprepared they are until it becomes too late. When next you consider starting a relationship, you must be sure that you are ready to love without holding back. Also, you must be certain that your partners share similar ideas about love and commitment. In this video, I am going to show you 9 reasons why most relationships don't last. 1. Lack of understanding. When you love someone, doesn't make you understand them. You probably think so, but this isn't true. It is one of the main reasons relationships don't last. You and your partner have to understand each other. This is especially important as it relates to work and finance. If your opinions are different, challenges are bound to come up. Understanding your partner needs is crucial for the long-term sustenance of your relationship. Many people in relationships do not even know each other's long-term goals. This is a mistake. It means that when your partner decides to invest all his savings, you will put up a fight. You need to understand what each of you wants to do even before you agree to enter into a relationship. Relationships are serious and can affect your mental health if it is stressful. Stress in a relationship comes from trying to understand why your partner is acting the way they are acting and arguing. To avoid all of this, have long conversations before you enter into the relationship. Try to understand your partner as best as you can. 2. Trust issues. This is also a problem for most couples. Trust is an essential factor in a relationship. Relationships often lead to marriage. When you are in a relationship, the tendency is to open up about your background, your past and your present. To deal all that you need to be able to trust the person you are dealing with. A great way to do this is by getting to know your partner's friends. Try conversing with them often to know whether your partner has discussed anything you have told them with them. It is also a good idea to know what your partner's friends think of you. Friends are very influential in people's lives. If they like you, they will certainly give their approval. Try asking personal questions every now and then to know whether your partner trusts you. We'll let you know on time whether the relationship is heading anywhere or not in many relationships. Men are the problem. They make the women insecure by hanging out often with other women and this breeds mistrust in the relationship. It is sometimes difficult for women to imagine that a man may have something with another woman if he hangs out with her, even simply as work colleagues. Trust is something that requires effort from both parties to build. One party alone cannot build a trust in a relationship. 3. Differences and Values This is another reason people often overlook. What is his religious background? Does he have any domestic expectations simply because you are the woman? Is she of the view that only men should spend in the family? Does she tolerate smoking? These are some of the questions you should consider when settling for a relationship. A person who doesn't share your ideals is unlikely to add a lot of value in your relationship. It is so important to know this on time because when you eventually realize, you would have wasted all the time you spent working on the relationship. Find out what your partner's money values are. Also find out what they would prefer doing during a vacation. If all your partner wants is sex, it is a big red flag that they are yet to really figure themselves out. A relationship is a commitment. As such, before you commit, you must find out if your partner wants to do it long term. Done is you. List them what their dreams are and what they are currently doing to accomplish it. If you are a hardworking and ambitious woman, you wouldn't want to be dragged down by a lazy and hopeless man. And show you know what your partner's values are before you commit to a relationship. There are more profitable ways to use time than in a pointless relationship. 4. Immaturity Some couples are usually not ready for the relationship. They enter relationships immediately because they fell in love at first sight. Are you among this category of people? If you are, you should probably give the relationship a lot of thought. Relationships should not be based on sentiment. People can manipulate sentiment to suit their advantage. An abusive man can use sentiment to maintain his marriage. A cheating wife can use sentiment to keep her marriage and vice versa. Always enter into a relationship after carefully evaluating your options. Most couples who don't do this usually end up fighting in the course of their relationship. To fight over authority, over forgetfulness, cheating, nonchalance towards each other's interests and poor phone culture, immature couples are usually less likely to stay together as well. To avoid constantly fighting in a relationship, find out what your partner's interests, likes and dislikes are. Things like remembering your partner's birthday is a great step. You can also remember your anniversary, call back often and not complain about everything. 5. Lack of romance When the relationship has gone on for a while, the couple needs to constantly find ways of doing things to keep the relationship exciting. A boring relationship is a recipe for a breakup when you are young. When you are young, your priority is not to get married. It is to have fun and exciting relationship with a man or woman you love. This means that when the relationship does not meet your expectations, you are likely going to call it quits. People should try as much as possible to not get too used to each other so that they can continue to do exciting and fun things to spice up their relationship. Send her flowers at work every day, even if you guys have dated for over a year. Send her love messages at night and always remember to call during the weekend. 6. Wrong motives for dating Some young people date because of the financial benefits they can gain from the other person. Sometimes they date a person for the emotional security of knowing they can call someone theirs to show off to their friends. Are you currently dating because of this? It is wrong to date someone simply because of what you stand to benefit. Relationships are a two-way arrangement. You should give value and get value. You shouldn't date a lady simply because you want to sleep with her. You should only date someone you like and with whom you are compatible. 7. Abuse of empathy and tolerance Some young people in relationships have no empathy and tolerance towards their partners. This is a very bad idea. Having no tolerance in a relationship can make you abusive. People who have this problem shouldn't even enter into a relationship in the first place. Learn to empathize with others and tolerate them first. When you have learned, then maybe you can think of a relationship. 8. Character flows like pride, lying and cheating One of the worst things you can do in a relationship is to tell lies. Trust is the foundation of all relationships. If your partner can't trust you, there is no relationship. Avoid lying and cheating in your relationship. It can destroy it. Pride is also not desirable. A proud person who enters a relationship will never apologize. This can be your problem. 9. No commitment If you are not ready for a relationship, don't enter into one. Going into a relationship with someone is a commitment. It is unfair on your part if you ignore the commitment. If you are not sure whether you are ready, don't do it. In conclusion, everyone in a relationship needs to work on themselves, for both your sake and that of your partner.