 Craft presents the Great Gilder Sleeve. The makers of parquet margarine and a complete line of famous quality food products presents Harold Perry as the Great Gilder Sleeve. Craft brings you the Great Gilder Sleeve every week at this time, written by John Whedon and Sam Moore with music by Claude Swedon. Here from the Great Gilder Sleeve in just a moment. First, a special message. This summer, four million emergency workers are urgently needed on American farms. You can help by devoting your spare time and energies to the task of cultivating and harvesting these vital crops. Plan now to be a victory farm volunteer. And now, here's good advice to everyone who's working extra hard these days. Help replenish some of that energy you use up each day by spreading delicious parquet margarine on bread, toast, rolls and crackers. Parquet, you know, is one of the very best energy foods you can eat. And it's fortified by craft so that every pound contains 9,000 units of important vitamin A. So for delicious, satisfying flavor, and for good nutrition too, serve parquet at every meal. Tomorrow, ask your dealer for parquet, P-A-R-K-A-Y, parquet margarine made by craft. For the Great Gilder Sleeve. A thing that's always puzzled Gilder Sleeve is how Birdie, working as she does in the back of the house, always knows what goes on out front. Yesterday morning, for instance, the family was sitting quietly at breakfast. Gilder Sleeve with his mind on his troubles, Marjorie with her mind on hers, Leroy with his mind on a cinnamon bun, when suddenly Birdie came charging in from the kitchen. Mr. Gisley! Mr. Gisley! Don't scare me like that, Birdie. What is it? Yeah, what? Look there! Where? Across the street in front of the bullets. Well, I'll be. It's the undertaker's wagon. We don't usually call them wagons, Birdie. See, there's a man getting out the driver's seat. By George, you don't suppose. I mean, I wonder, I wonder who? I mean, I hope nobody knows. I don't know where that Leroy is. Leroy, come back here. What's the matter? We don't ask about things like that. Now, sit down. Okay, gosh. Man wants to find out something the only way is to ask. Now, ain't that a shame, and the bullet was given a party today, too. A party? Oh, here comes Judge Hooker. Maybe he knows something. It's a slim chance. He stopped to look. That man's opening up the back of the wagon. That's not a wagon, Birdie. I don't think we should all be standing here staring out the window. What's that he's taking out? Chairs. That's all it is. They've rented chairs for the party. Chey. Gold ones, too. I got to get over there and talk to Lily B. Scarbell. I'm coming. It's the judge. Good morning, Judge. Come in. There seems to be quite a bit of activity across the street, Birdie. Yes, and you was watching it. This girl sleep is right there in the diseased room. Good morning, Gilday, Marjorie, Leroy. Hi. Hi. What's going on? Going on where? Across the street. Is something going on I hadn't noticed. Don't tell me you haven't seen Luther Peabody's hearse parked over there. I am not my neighbor's keeper, Judge. And I don't go running to the window every time a hearse drives up. Huh! From the looks of things, however, I should say that the Bullards are planning some sort of social affair. Oh. Were you invited? Were you? No. Neither was I. It can't be much of a party. kids isn't it Martin? Don't ask me. Marshall Bullard's giving a dance for the kids in his class. Martin knows all about it. Oh, that's so my dear. You haven't said anything to me about it. I really couldn't say Uncle Martin. The whole thing is a matter of the greatest indifference to me. Yeah, she just couldn't sleep last night. That's all. That is not true. Why don't you mind your own business? Now children. She's just so because Marshall wouldn't go to his old party if he came crawling to me on bended knees. He seemed to have stirred up a hornet's nest. No, they're contemptible. Oh, punch her right in the nose. You do nothing of the kind. You go upstairs to her and apologize. What? Go up and apologize to your sister. I don't know. Go up and see if you can't make her feel better. Make her feel better? How do you think I feel after what she called me? Go, Leroy. Okay. I'm sorry, Horace. Oh, these little squabbles occur. Poor girl's upset, I'm afraid, and I don't blame her. Who do the Bullards think they are anyway? I suppose my niece isn't good enough for him. Maybe they just forgot to invite her, Gilday. Maybe it was an oversight. Oversight my eye. Bullard probably decided he didn't want his son seeing so much of her. Well, I don't want her seeing so much of him. Hereafter, let him keep away from here. Let him just keep off the property. Tell Marjorie to come on down, too. Judge never have any children. I wasn't planning to. Constant worry, particularly girls. Leroy, try and be a little nice to your sister today. Yeah, try and be nice to her. Well, she's upset. Let you and I see if we can't cheer her up. Oh, shut up, Leroy. Marjorie, I've been thinking. What would you like to do this evening? What do you think would be more fun than anything else? I don't know. Well, think anything you'd like. Just name it. By golly, Gilday, that's going to be quite a party. Look what they're carting in now. Judge, would you do me a favor? What's that, Gilday? Go away. Well, I guess I can take a hint. No, Judge. I guess I know enough not to stay where I'm not wanted. It's not that horus, but right now. I need you good day. Oh, good day. Now, he soar. No wonder you're never invited anywhere. Oh, good. Have you decided yet? What are we going to do for a good time this evening? I don't know. Anything at all, anything you'd like. We'll show those Bullards we can have a good time without them. What'll it be? I don't know. Don't just sit there and say you don't know. Think. I tell you, I don't care. I know something, Uncle. It's Marjorie. We're trying to cheer up, Leroy. Not you. Oh, Marjorie, love this song. She'd be crazy about it. Well, what is it? What do you say we all go out to Nippersink? The Schultz's Park. You mean go on the shoot the shoots? Sure. They got one out there that's a pimp. Well, I don't know, Leroy. Marjorie, love it. Wouldn't you Marjorie? I guess so. I don't care. You see, what did I tell you? Can we go on the shoot? How about it? Can we go? We'll see. You see, you hear that, Marjorie said we can go. Did I? Gosh, you don't get up in town. Who's not going to take them to Schultz's Park? They're far away, maybe, but not their uncle. All right, Leroy. We'll go. Tell me. Now, Marjorie's all right, aren't you, my dear? Yes, sir. We're all going out to Schultz's Park tonight and have the time of our lives, aren't we? Sure. Then you're not going to the Bullard's Party, Throckmont? Are you? No, I decided not. Neither am I. As a matter of fact, I wasn't invited. Well, I'm glad neither was I. That's what I came over to talk to you about. I think it's a perfect outrage. I mean, I don't know them terribly well, but after all... I understand they're just giving the party for young people, Leroy. Well, gracious. I may not be 14, but that doesn't mean... Now, don't get upset, Leroy. Marjorie wasn't invited either. I was too invited. What's that? I said I was invited. I'm just not going. You didn't tell me you were invited. I give up. What's this all about? What are we doing going to Schultz's Park when you could be... Oh, she loves Schultz's Park. She'd rather go there than go to Marshall's Bullard's Old Party. Wouldn't you, Marjorie? Leroy, if you please. Well, my dear? I wouldn't go to Marshall's Party, but we're the last party on Earth. Why, Marjorie? Because when a girl you formerly thought was your friend, turns out to be nothing but a wolf in sheep's clothing. She's talking about Francie. You keep out of this. A thousand pardons. Who's Francie? My best friend. That is, she was my best friend. Frances White. That mousey little thing. Do you really think she's lousy? Some of the boys seem to think she's kind of attractive. Gracious. I don't know who'd look at it twice. Well, forget Francie. That's water over the dam. That's the end of a friendship, that's all. But Marshall. What about him? Well, I thought it was kind of funny when all I got was a regular invitation in the mail. What do you want him to do? Drive up on a gold limousine? Oh, will you keep out of this? Leroy, I think it might be just as well if you stepped outside. What did I do? You too, Throckmorton. Both of you. I think this is something we can talk over better if it's just between us girls. Well, I... Madre and I have some secret things to discuss. They're not for yo-ey as now. Run along. Please, Uncle Maury. All right, my dear. Come on, Leroy. Wait a second. Now, if you won't get anywhere by staying away from that darling, what should I do? Go and make him suffer. Yeah. Throckmorton, you're listening. Get along, Leroy. Where are we going? Out on the porch. And by the way, my boy, while you're resting. I only said I'd mow the front, remember? Three strips. But it's hard. It wouldn't be if you'd mow the way I tell you. Now, you bend down and throw your weight behind it. You didn't tell me just what to do. Leroy. And I could hardly wait. Madre, I don't like that look in your eye. What did she tell you to do? Don't you tell him of. I won't. Oh, push. I'm going to the party after all. Yes, Leroy. Our little Cinderella is going to the ball. I guess that means her poor old uncle will be spending the evening alone. Unless I can persuade the fairy godmother to keep me company. How about it, Lila? I'd love to. Hey, wait a minute. Wait a minute. What about me? You? What about Schultz's park? Schultz's park. You promised, remember? You promised. Well, it wasn't exactly a promise, Leroy. Not a promise on. Well, Marjorie that I promised anyway. Now Marjorie's going to the party instead. And besides, I... Now, don't you start crying. There's no for... Gracious, I shouldn't. They don't want to be the cause of it. And I thought... Hold on, everybody. Hold on. I know what we'll do. What? I don't know. The Great Gilder Sleeve will be with us again in just a few seconds. Six letters, P-A-R-K-A-Y, spell parquet, and three little words tell why your whole family will like it. They'll like it because it tastes so good. And that's plenty good enough for the millions of families who daily enjoy parquet. In fact, millions prefer parquet to any other brand because it tastes so good. Try it, discover for yourself how good parquet tastes when you spread it on bread, toast, and rolls. See if you too don't prefer parquet's fresh, delicate flavor to any other brand. And don't forget, there's wonderful nourishment in parquet, margarine too. It's tops in food energy value and craft fortifies every pound of parquet with 9,000 units of important vitamin A. So buy this nourishing spread that tastes so good. Ask for parquet margarine made by craft. It's preferred by millions to any other brand. Now, let's get back to the Great Gilder Sleeve. We find him partaking of a coal supper in the company of his nephew, Leroy, since Bertie is off to help Lillie be at the Bullards. Well, my boy, this is just like camping, isn't it? How would I know I've never been camping? Oh, that's right. I guess you have. We'll have to go on a camping trip one of these days, just the two of us. Pass the catch-up please. Well, I suppose we'll go to Schultz's Park someday too. Now, Leroy, a decision has been reached and we'll stand by it, won't we? See you here, young man. Well, look at Marjorie, long dress. You'll be the bell of the bullet ball, my dear. Do I really look all right? Oh, beautiful. Doesn't your sister look nicely, Leroy? Yeah. Gosh, she looks grown up or something. Leroy, what a sweet thing to say. I don't suppose you meant it. Yeah, something looks different. It's my hair. This is the way Greer Garson wears hers. Do you think it's too early for me to go over? I suppose so. Francie's father dumped her over there about five minutes ago. Francie, I've got to get over there right away. You don't have to worry with Greer Garson's hair. Goodbye, Auntie. Goodbye, Leroy. Goodbye. Have a good time. So long. Well, my boy, you'll be going to parties like that pretty soon. I have to send you to the dancing school one of these days. Oh, me? Marge must have forgot something. You sit there and finish your beats. I'll go. Ponce Craig Bullard. That's the excitement over at your house today, isn't it? I want Leroy to play with me. Yeah, I heard you. Is it true you're going to have an orchestra over there, Craig? Hi, Leroy. Hi. Why, George, if he was my kid... I've got five dollars, Leroy. What was that? I've got five dollars. Well, well, where'd you get five dollars, my boy? He's kidding. He's always claiming he's got a lot of money. I've got five dollars. I put digit. I didn't have to. They gave it to me. Oh? Who gave it to you? My father gave me two dollars. My father gave me two dollars. My brother gave me one dollar. He stinks. Now, Craig, that's not a nice thing to say about Marshall, is it? He's my brother. I guess he's got me there. Hey, I have to happen to give you all this dough, Craigie. They gave it to me for staying away from the party. They thought I wanted to go. Hey, he's getting something out of this party about me. Craig, Marge, are you... I told you, Leroy, some other time. Can Leroy and I go to the park? No, Craig. Leroy hasn't. I think Craig was all from to take me, honk. Aren't you, Craigie? Nope. This is not a financial question, Leroy. I don't want you going to the park without me. Oh, gosh. I don't see why everybody should get a reward but me. I'm not made of money, and I'll not have you squandering it. Oh, squandering it? I'll spend it on something worthwhile. I know. I only need around two dollars to fill my war stamp book. A dollar sixty, I think. We've discussed this some other time, my boy. You and Craig think of some nice way to play. Okay. Say, Craigie, you know that magic trick you liked? Which one? Where the penny goes into the matchbox. Come on upstairs. I'll show you how to do it. Okay. Come on, Craig. I think you'll like this trick. Okay. Wait a minute. Mr. Gildersleeve, would you hold my five dollars while I'm up there? Simply don't understand why there's never any hot water in this house when I want to shave. Simply don't understand why there's never any hot water in this house when I want to shave. Simply don't understand why there's never any hot water in this house when I want to shave. This marjorie must have taken a pretty long bath. What the... Can't be Lila. Leroy! My kid never hears when you want him to. Mr. Gildersleeve? Peevee. I was for disturbing you when you were shaving, I see. What? Lather on your ear. I say I much apologize for disturbing you. Not at all. Come in, Peevee. Oh, I can't stay in a fractured diamond. Is that for me? What were you saying, Peevee? I just delivered some ice cream across the street. Now I can't get my car started. Oh, out of gas? No, it seems to be in the battery. I just thought if I could use your phone. Well, let me try pushing you first, Peevee. Oh, no, I see you're all dressed up. Must be a woman in a template. Well, maybe there is, and maybe there isn't. That's what I'm saying. Come on, Peevee, where's your car? Right out front here. Let's go, huh? Peevee, sounds like quite an exclusive affair. Oh, no, I wouldn't say that. There's all kinds over there, including riff-raff. Oh? You don't say. True, for instance. Well, I've got to be discreet. Must go to sleep. Some of my best customers are riff-raff. Well, I'll have to hand it to you, Peevee. You're pretty cagey. No, I wouldn't say that. Oh, yes you are. Is this your jalopy? This is my shining chariot. Yep. All right, get in your shining chariot and turn on the ignition. I'll shove. Well, Mr. Goethe, I don't know how to thank you. Don't thank me until she starts, Peevee. I'm afraid that'll be too late. When this car starts, she starts. Well, never mind. Just get in and steer. All right. Ignition on? Yes, sir. Put her in neutral, like at a rolling, then put her in the high. Sad? Well, why should you feel sad on a nice night like this? Oh, looking across at the boys and girls circling around over there and laughing and flirting. I declare it just seems ages since I've been to a party. But, Leela, what's the best part of a party? Isn't it sneaking out with somebody and looking for a hammock? Well... Well, we've got the hammock. It's not the same truck, Martin. We haven't had the fun of sneaking off. Oh. Well, all right. Let's pretend then. You pretend your lady, whatchamacallit, and I'm Lord so-and-so. And we have a rendezvous. Now, you're here waiting. I don't like that idea. You should be waiting for me if you're any kind of a gentleman. I'm a Lord, Leela. Oh. Well, okay. I'm waiting for you. I'm pacing up and down, then, anxiously awaiting my lady fair. Oh, this is fun. Well, hurry up. I can't pace all night. I got flat feet. Silly. Ah, but hark! Me thinks I hear the footsteps of my love approaching. Tissie! Leela, my darling. Rock, Martin. Come here, Leela. Now, Rock, Martin. Leeroy, it's nonsense. Music will put you to sleep in no time if you'll just let it. I did. Then it stopped and woke me up. I packed a bed, Leeroy, and go to sleep. Oh, I didn't see you. Hello, Leeroy. Well, good night, good night. Good night, Leeroy. Now, where were we? Goldstruck, Martin. Got to start all over. Would you like me to tell you a story, Leela? Hmm. All right. What kind of a story? A true story. Okay, let me see. Once upon a time, there was a handsome water commissioner. And one day, he met a beautiful lady named Leela. That's more like it. She was the most beautiful lady he'd ever seen. She had blue eyes and lovely, silk and blonde hair and a beautiful, smooth, white complexion. And when the water commissioner saw this beautiful creature, he forgot everything. And then, Leela, she said, she said, she said, she said, she saw this beautiful creature, he forgot everything. He just took her in his arms with Leela, please. Leeroy, I told you to go to sleep. I can't. There's a fly in my room. Well, kill him. And put your head under the covers. I'm afraid I'd snother. Wait a minute, Leeroy. I'm over here for a moment, young man. I'm sorry, Yunk. I just can't seem to get to sleep. If I gave you two dollars, do you think you'd be able to doze off, Leeroy? Sure try, Yunk. Here. Gee, thanks. I'm not going to spend this money, you know. Yeah, I know. Now go to bed. I'm going to use it to fill out my war stamp book. Then pretty soon I can get a bun. And you know, a bun by 750 machine gun bullets. That's finally right. Or a bun to fly a B-29 in 15 minutes. Or a bun by two tires for a G. Or a bun by... I know, Leeroy. Now go to bed before I take back the two dollars. Okay. Good night, Yunk. Good night. Good night, Mrs. Ransom. Good night. I don't like the way that boy said good night to me. Huh? He says as if he thought something was going on. Oh, no. Leeroy is just a child, Leeroy. Besides, there's nothing going on. That little devil. Oh, I just love that sound. Yeah. So do I. Good night, sweetheart. Sleep will banish sorrows and party. Make us forlorn. But with a dawn. Good night, sweetheart. Though I'm not beside. Good night. Still my love will go. Well, a nice night in June with a pretty girl is easy to forget there's a war on. But the Japanese are a long way from being licked. I suppose you've all seen the pictures of the Saratoga. And you know what a terrible pasting she took from those Jap suicide bombers. We've got to realize that the Japs are going to fight more and more desperately as we close in on them. That's why our men need every advantage in material and equipment that we can possibly give them. That means bonds. Let's see that no American is left fighting with his bare hands because we didn't dig down in our pockets for the money to buy guns. It's not a question of how much we think we can spare, but how much they need. Nimitz and Marshall say $14 billion. Let's give it to them. Good night, everybody. Scarce, do our American homemakers take it sitting down? No, ma'am. That's when many resourceful women are right on their toes, reaching into the pantry shell for some tangy, golden Kraft salad mustard. While there are dozens of appetite-rousing ways, you can serve Kraft salad mustard with whatever foods are available. Kraft salad mustard blends with luscious smoothness into keen-tasting cream sauces for hot-cooked vegetables. Av's delicious flavor to cheese fondues puts an extra tempting tang into French salad dressings, gravies, pickle relishes, and barbecue sauce. So perk up your meals with the zestful flavor of Kraft salad mustard. Get this other delicious variety, too. Kraft mustard with nippy horseradish added. Buy both kinds and please the whole family. Ask for Kraft prepared mustard.