 Living with a needy and nagging spouse can be quite annoying. And what it tends to do for us is to help is actually provoke us to go the other way and to react. Of course, the problem is that when we react, we actually provoke our spouse to feel even more needy through actually perpetuating the cycle. So while we can help our spouse understand why they might be needy, one of the best things we can do to help them and to stop the cycle is to actually work on our own reactivity. Work on the way that we react to them and respond when they're expressing their needs. So instead of pulling away and not listening to them and not giving them time, it's important to be able to find some inner calm within ourselves, to be able to hear what they need and to be able to help meet their needs. Because otherwise they're going to keep pursuing you and they're going to keep nagging and whatever is annoying you about the neediness is going to actually be compounded. So become aware of it. Why does it bother you that your spouse is needy? What about neediness bothers you specifically based on your own history in your own world and begin to understand that and also begin to have a little bit of compassion and curiosity for your partner trying to understand, well, I'm wondering why they're feeling needy, what's going on for them in their life right now that they're feeling extra needy and what can I do to help meet their needs as opposed to pull away and reject them, making them feeling even more needy. If you have a needy spouse and would like to work on your relationship together, be in touch with us and we'd love to hear about your unique situation and see how we can be of assistance.