 Hi everyone. So yeah I think most of you would have thought why I fucked up was because I have so many hyphenated words in my profile but that's not the reason why I fucked up. There are a lot more other reasons. I am good at multitasking so that works in favor. So today I'm just going to share about my all the fuckups almost that I've done my life very short and sweet and this is actually my second event that I've attended and I came here I think the previous one and then I said I have to share my story people have to know what are the stupid fuckups that I've done so that actually shows the light of the end of the tunnel there is light definitely and I'll tell you why in my last life because I can see light now and I'm actually in that light so my story is a very very Hollywood film or a Bollywood film story so I was born as a princess was raised as a princess everything was my dad and my mom and our family and then one fine day everything came crashing down my dad just passed away we didn't have any money I didn't have a house for a while and so on so I've been through all of that and I was 15 so all of that went there my mom and I pulled through that and all that kept me going was education because I was really good at what I did and I love science so from the time that I know that I was aware of what I wanted to do in my life I wanted to do something in relation to science wanted to be a doctor it didn't work out fine that's the first fuckup and then because we didn't have money first thing okay so that's the first fuckup and then I said okay let me go on and do something else in science and life has always been like this it's been rollercoaster ride up down sideways thrown here into the ditch up and then suddenly down it still keeps happening every day of my life so this is how it's been and like I said education is the only thing that kept me going and I very well remember this quote when I was about 15 years old I read this and from Nelson Mandela and he said education is the most powerful weapon which you can use to change the world I didn't want to change the world per se but I at least wanted to change the life that I was living in and it kind of changed when I met my now husband when I was 15 so it's been 20 years since we know each other and now you know my age as well so actually I'm only 32 so I met him when I was 12 actually but we fell in love and we're 15 so we are married we have oh yeah well there are a lot of fuckups there as well so yeah so like I say science is the air that I breathe and in the air that you breathe it's in the room that you're sitting in it's in the food that you're eating it's everywhere so science is everything so based on that I went on to do a bachelor's and then a master's and then a PhD in Singapore and 2009 when I moved to Singapore was when I was a rebirth like a rebirth like life started becoming better I could bring my mom here I started earning a bit to support ourselves we had a stipend I got a degree which is a PhD I got a doctor in front of my name even though I can't do a surgery or save your lives but I can save an animal's life so that's how it started off with and then went down the traditional path of being a scientist researcher lab rats staying in my lab code living in the lab doing all the experiments it's not as nice as you perceive it to be the way they show it in YouTube and everything it actually sucks so so then in 2014 my my friends two of them who we did PhD together we all get frustrated with life we were like now we finished our PhD we've been through all the hell that we can be through and now we have our full-time jobs but what are we going to do what else shall we do we're capable of doing other things so for me business startup was like a new feel like I had no clue about it I for me it's like having a job getting my paycheck every month I'm happy I love traveling I love shopping I'm gonna do that and live life happily and 2014 was when my son was about nine months old and I had a fuck up there as well because my son was really sick once he was born so that was very bad nine months my pregnancy was great but after he was born it was like why did I give birth to my son it was like that so that was a very down time for us and my husband is a businessman so I always kept thinking that businesses for my husband you mean you he's on the phone all the time he's on the internet all the time he's he's working like 24 hours I don't want to do that I love sitting in the lab and working 24 hours but then he kept always telling me that you know be your own boss stop complaining about your boss be your own boss do something on your own that's what's going to keep you sustained you throughout your life I said well okay let's see so friends and I were like just sitting and chatting and then we said let's do something together start it instead of so easily but then yeah we had a few ideas that we came up with all of them were like we did all of it and then our friends husbands are actually like my husband is a businessman her husband is a businessman as well and they said well it's not going to work so ditch that and then the next idea ditch that and then finally we came up with this idea which is actually a news website to talk about health news in simple English for everybody to understand it doesn't have to you don't have to know science or you don't have to know the jargons of medical terms to understand so the next question was okay we have started off the website we started earning a little bit of money here and there we started getting ads we got good traction initially and then the next question was investment so we went on to talk to some investors and the first question was well you have a full-time job so we don't want to invest in you and I said well I don't think that should matter because our team is there and we're doing a good job and they just kept telling no we are not gonna unless you leave your job we are not going to spend money on you so that's when the question came as to whether I want to the risky startup or I stick to my job so like I said in my life I've had times when I didn't have a roof over my head I said that's never gonna happen to me especially with my son and my husband and everyone there so I said no I'm not going to give up my job I can do this as well at the same time so let's go on so we went on put in our own money and that's the website by the ways it's called biotic in Asia so the main reason we started off was we felt that the media was feeding people wrong health can use so we said okay let's make the wrong right not the best idea at times because people love clickbaiting you know you love reading headlines that are awesome like oh cure for cancer and then you go click on it and then you find some bullshit under it you know so we started saying you know stuff like if you down regulate this gene cancer will be cured nobody wants to look at it you know what gene what down regulation like what is that so along the way we learned how to market stuff to people but without doing clickbaiting and we still don't do it the business is still going on the website is very much there but I'm not a part of it anymore I'm still right sorry I'll still write that's another fuck up anyway I still right but I don't manage the company so you know there's this gut feeling that you have in your in your stomach that's when you start something and I had I have this feeling anytime I do anything because with all the failures that I've had my life it's like if I'm gonna start something it's going to fuck up I know for sure and I know I can get through it as well so when I started off it by taking Asia itself I had a feeling that things are not going to go down the right way but I kept pushing for it and these are the lessons that I learned from it first thing never start a business with your friends especially if it's your best friends yes never do it I'm never doing it again never start a business with your husband or wife as well unless you want to have a divorce so yes so if that's your end goal then go ahead that's the best way to have a divorce actually instead of fighting other ways next thing never do a 5050 partnership that's the worst thing that you can do you're in a deadlock situation each each of you have different opinions or I mean I mean don't do an equal partnership among partners never do it I never knew nobody told me all of this by the way so you know 50 50 partnership you're in a deadlock she wants another thing he or she wants another thing you want another thing you're just stuck there your company is going down and you're like nowhere to go the next thing is please do hire a legal representative okay that's representative sorry for the type of but yeah do hire or at least get a person who can help you I know legal fees are extremely high in Singapore that's the main reason we didn't go for one and then we ended up you know getting advice and I wouldn't call it advice but whatever you call it I you know those pointers from people who think that they are lawyers there are people like that out there so you know those people come to you and then they are like you know pushing you and you kind of like okay he's you know he's probably done an MBA from a very you know big institute okay let's listen to him don't do that and the next thing is when you go for the registration so Acura is like a place where you register your company in Singapore it's actually a one-hour process you can do it online from your home that's that's what I love about this country be sure of who your partners are who how many shares each partner holds and what they do yeah you can understand where effective for that so yeah so that's how I kind of felt but I still kept swimming up and up with that heavy ball and then you know eventually two years down the line I you know started feeling that okay there are different visions we're going either ways and then you know we're going opposite directions and each of us had different passions our passions took over everything and we started you know looking at how we can be amazing in our startup sorry rather than how I can be amazing in our startup rather than we can be amazing and then you know started becoming like one of them were getting the fame the other one wasn't and all of that happened and this is exactly what happened so we eventually I decided to divorce and get out of the relationship from the startup but it was quite amicable in that sense because I didn't want nothing to happen to the company basically so the company is doing great it's still there the websites that's going on it's right for it but the thing is like I said the business was like that and then the personal was exactly like this and my husband told me one day I think you and I will split if this goes on so better you split from there so I said okay I can't lose you I know you for 20 years so yeah that's where we kind of decided but a good thing that happened is like you know my husband keeps telling me this that change is the only thing that's permanent which is perfect because that's the only thing that's there and what I decided to do is step down so I said okay I'm gonna step down it was hard it was really hard I mean you know I started off with such passion to talk about people about health and awareness and all of that and I had to give it up but then I like I said I still write so it's okay for me but then what happened is I am this kind of person like if I need 10 people I'll have hundreds of ideas from that like from one conversation that I've had with you and my phone is like my notepad I just keep writing down all my ideas and I then I go back and then think about it and then look at which would make sense to go forward with and so on so I had these set of ideas that I wanted to incorporate in the previous company but that didn't happen so I just opened another one of those ideas so I had hundreds and then came down to five so for people who are not from the science might not understand this but it's just a community website it's a community building website where scientists and people in the science can come together and learn from each other and what I do is coordinate with other education companies to see how they can bring science into the curricular on students and so on and like I said in my PhD like all of us doing PhD we have had a lot of fuck ups so basically we share our kind of stories here and then we have like ratings of the laboratories that we have worked in and so on which our professors aren't happy about but anyways but the good thing that I was telling you that I can see light at the end of the tunnel is I just got some funding so yes you can clap and the investor was not bothered about all of us having full-time jobs we are four people in the team all of us have full-time jobs all of us are in different parts of the world none of them are in Singapore like except me and they're not my friends first now they are friends but it started off like that and just received minimal funding so keeping our fingers crossed that it would do well and just wanted to leave you with this message saying trust your gut always yeah that's all