 Welcome back ladies and gents and guys I'd like to start by giving you another Opportunity to ask some questions because I know there's still some more at the end of last session So if anybody has a question, they want to ask now is a good time to do it. I see a see a hand See a couple of hands Thank you It's Should a man hold more power in a long-term relationship, I mean I'm single I don't have any kids So I'm not really like the best person to ask about long-term relationships because I don't give a fuck about them. I think I Think people should do whatever they want. I did speak to a lady yesterday. I've spoken to three Goals in the last 24 hours told them about this convention told what I'm doing and their response Wasn't neutral. It was to paraphrase. Mr. Johnson. Fuck. Yeah All three of these goals ones raised Eastern Orthodox. She's Serbian ones in Malaysia She's Malay. She's Muslim and the other girl is from Romania and now they were like, well, what are you talking about? What is this thing? And I said, well, this is it. This is what these guys believe these are some of their ideas and They were like giving me responses and I was laughing and I was going I think your responses is what these guys call Tragic on and now not the these goals The Muslim goal lives in a Muslim country Malaysia I mean, it's it's there is no separation of church and state that is a Muslim country for Muslims And if you don't like it off you go, I lived there for three years And and she says she's she's smart goals. She's got degree in psychology. She's educated in the UK She says she's under so much pressure there to be a wealthy entrepreneur At age 27 and all she wants to do is get married and have kids and she feels like that's become a thought crime in Malaysia in a Muslim a devoutly Rigidly nationalistic and Muslim country. She is a 27 year old Muslim goal. So she's she's late to get married She says nobody's pressuring me towards that, but everybody's pressuring me to make money So I had a similar conversation with her with the Romanian goal her situation is a bit different the Serbian goal said what you just said which is and That this goal like she flipped on me. I wasn't expecting this at all She said in a long-term relationship. I believe the man should have more power And I'm like, okay, and she said what do you think and I'm like, you know, so I was like what you know answering as a psychologist. I Think what I've observed is that there are there's like culture-bound expectations But also we know from the research that when The man there is a correlation between if the man is older more experienced and higher status Then the relationship has more sustainability What I've observed in my private life is when you have two people who are exactly the same age and the woman is earning More than the man has more status and more power than the man I know I'm they're in my extended family both couples the guys are happy But silly and boyish in their fifties and the women are miserable. They're better as fuck Do I assume from these observations that then if a woman is in a long-term relationship with a man She needs to feel that he's more powerful than her Yes, I observed that do I have scientific evidence that proves it conclusively? No I was a big follower of I still am of Patrice O'Neill. He was a stand-up comic He sadly passed away years ago now And he made the point a semi scientific point that in the mammalian world where there is a big weight disparity between the sexes that we can track that men sorry males and females are polyamorous for example, so if if Amongst say dogs male dogs are bigger than female dogs or there's a disparity then you're polyamorous So I was like well That would suggest then that there must be a biological root for certain preferences and behaviors We are bigger than women. So we are fall into that category of mammals where between the sexes. There's a size difference There's a size difference. I immediately in order to be a man. I'm bigger than The woman so then it is it within her hard-wired non-cultural Instinctive drive to experience me as being bigger than her more powerful than her in every area of life Possibly humans aren't that complex. I mean we're pretty in terms of symbolism We're quite crude like if you're bigger than me here Then you should be bigger than me there if you're like the reverse right you get guys who don't want to get with women Who are making more money than them because you should be smaller than me Physically and maybe financially as well. So My observation to answer your question in a more concise way would be it seems to be the case that that is what women want Make sense to me. There was another hand that went. Yeah Hey Richard. Hi. I'm trying to switch from mindset of scarcity to mindset of abundance. I'm Right now in my work environment. It's a very It comes from mindset of scarcity. There's a lot of time pressure It doesn't have a long longevity and it's basically a zero-sum game for me to win to make money. I have to beat somebody Mentally not physically and Life doesn't work like this. I think that life is abundant for you to succeed You can succeed while helping other people and they're like pay you for that Basically what I'm looking to dip in my feet into but somehow is I'm trying to get from this scarce environment to the abundant I Don't know how to get there because I have these mental models from the scarce world and I can't apply them Into the abundant world to succeed. You're conflating mindset with environment So you said you're looking for an abundant mindset, but your environment is scarcity Mindset can be divorced from the environment It's hard. It's a discipline and it would take very very strong internal boundaries But if you're in an environment that's telling you there's not enough there's not enough for you Psychologically to say there's more than enough for everybody would take a lot of strength and good boundaries You'd need strong internal boundaries and strong external boundaries So anytime you get a message of scarcity, you'd have to be able to unconsciously reject it without ever thinking about it but don't conflate the internal with the external and a mindset with an actual environment at your age It will be very hard for you to fight The environment and the culture and the tribal norms because at your age You're supposed to be following them So if you're in a tribe where everybody's like the scarcity the scarcity every impulse in you will be to do what they're saying So part of your maturation process if you set that intent you'd be like no matter how scarce the environment is I'm going to maintain an abundance mindset. It would serve you very well But we will be talking in like five to ten year sort of phasing for that. Does that make sense? Cool Hello, you mentioned People dealing with abandonment issues. Yeah, and if you are and you're trying to solve that puzzle box Can that be something that you'll? reasonably expect to be solving the rest of your life or Is there some method of self soothing or autonomy that can overcome that and And The well with this particular course That you guys will get access to what once we've shot it and edited it and I've had it I'm going to put other courses of mine in this that would help So I have a course to help people stop emotional flashbacks that you'll get I mean you guys will get this for free You'll get all of it free and but I'll also give you access to a course that helps you to develop emotional literacy If you're not flashbacking and you're emotionally literate, it's unlikely that you'll be at the mercy of strong Feelings of abandonment that are just emotional flashbacks. They're not based on anything real you brought up self soothing one of the things I hypothesize that having a strong present male role model in your childhood Equips you with is a couple of pieces of source code in the software One is the sense that no matter what everything is going to be okay and No matter what I'll be able to handle it I think that's what your father is supposed to give you a sense that everything is going to be okay like a baseline of A sturdy stoic optimism and the sense that no matter what happens. I will be able to handle it These things you mentioned abandonment anxiety, but I actually think that those two pieces of source code Help a lot with abandonment anxiety No matter what happens. I'll be able to handle it. Yeah, it's on my own that I can handle it on my own and Everything is going to work out. Okay, so the The way the methodology for handling it I think would be through developing emotional literacy a little bit more Which is not always pleasant and it takes time like there's a course I can give you guys to do It really really helps it massively helps, but it's not it's not a joy ride It can be a bit heavy sometimes Was there another hand that went up? Somebody at the back No, cool and so One of the things I wanted to raise with you at the beginning of this section is Trying to answer the question. How should men protect themselves from toxic relationships now? You can't really answer that question without looking at where we're up to culturally and historically again, I'm a newcomer to the Manosphere and red pill psychology or philosophy rather so if I'm repeating anything I apologize from my perspective speaking psychologically what I can see is that we're stuck between different modalities between Chivalry and this idea of equality you raised equality before sir. Just just to be clear When I say equality, I obviously don't mean literal equality Nothing outside of mathematics and physics is equal These are concepts from mathematics only numbers are equal as a Philosophical concept that we can aspire to Probably better off using the word fair Nobody really wants to equal like Nobody wants to equal would be so fucking weird. We'd all look exactly the same Identical twins I guess are equal in that sense what we want is justice and what we want is fairness and we've got this awkwardly Implanted idea from mathematics and physics, which is equal so That Concept I actually think Whilst it was well-intentioned has become toxic because we're now striving for something that is totally unnatural and totally unattainable You cannot attain equality in the same way that you can't attain total justice It's it's a concept to be moved towards so we're stuck between a toxic idea of equality that basically wants to smash everything down and make everything horizontal which sounds horrifying to me and chivalry Chivalry also has toxic elements to it because I personally believe Now available exclusively at 21 University The all-new CPTSD masterclass by Richard Granin This is the world's most advanced educational course on healing from complex trauma as a man Learn more at the link below or visit 21 University comm