 Kreispin mwe regi kethendi I'm a born again Christian I love the Saazas, my lord and savior Why not him who was on my side I could have died wrong time ago So I always thank him because he saved someone like me I was lost but I'm fine today I was dead but I'm alive So I came from Meru County Na Ndimenti Constituent Tima East Ward na village Kondikachanka. I have a family that I love so much. My father and my dad and my mum, Paul Kidinji and Rosemary. I have three sisters, Freda, Karen and Maureen. I'm also blessed, married to one beautiful wife. I have a little baby boy, Kondelanda Motweri. My journey growing up was interesting. I was so curious about life and so aggressive. I got an opportunity to go to school. My parents were so supportive and they really wanted to see the best out of me. So I went to primary level. I studied in quite a number of schools because of some issues here and there. During my primary time, especially when I was around class 5, class 6, there were some behaviors because of bad company and peer pressure from my fellow students that I got at that age. Things that really affected me even in the future and really affected my self-esteem as I was growing. There were some young friends of mine who were coming to school with some pornography magazines and we couldn't have a view of them and they affected my mind in one or another. But God was faithful because they did not really affect my studies though it affected to some extent. But because of the support from my parents and always having tuitions and what a view, I managed to continue to stand a hand and I finished class 8 and I went to high school. In primary school, the class 8 that I finished with was our lead of visitation primary school. Then I went to high school. In high school I went to St. Pires Seminary. In form 1 I was focused, very aggressive in studies. I went to form 2. In form 2 because of peer pressure again and banned company also. I got into some weird behaviours during entertainment times. We could have some students skiving out of school. They could come with some mirror. We could chew. Some could come with some such as of alcohol. We could drink. And it's only that the display of the institution was tough. Actually I could not have finished my high school level. But I thank God because the display was so high so you were displaying. I remember that day after being more of a liar I could trick my dad, get some money from him, go to school. One day he followed me up and he realized that the money I had asked him for was not for that purpose. So I remember the deputy prince put it a slap to me before my dad and since then I stopped lying. And after that I was able to complete my secondary school and by God's grace I got a good grade. I got a B plane and went to university. I joined Eagaton University back in the year 2009. When I joined Eagaton University in first year I was determined leadership was found in me and when I signed for a position of the student leadership I was given a chance. I became a congressman and when I was a congressman in first year it was something that had never happened before. So that gave me some pride and fame as well. So many students knew me and when I was in second year I was overwhelmed by the being famous everyone wants to associate with me. I had so many friends. Some were alcohol, some were drug addicts, some were Christians so now they all want to interact with me. But at that time there is some knowledge I didn't have about life. Knowledge that many young people are suffering today. I didn't know how to say no. So the friends that always came to me when they told me let's go for hout I could not say no. We go hout in Kuru town, have fun. At that time I was not abusing any alcohol so they could buy their drinks and I could just use sodas. But with the time because of peer pressure I ended up using alcohol I started chewing mirror I started smoking cigarettes Someday I could go out there and find them smoking weed or bangi. They could say that they are chained. They are giving, they are doing chained. So when I meet them they are in a circle they are smoking I didn't know that there is no spectator. I thought I could just go and spectate them smoking. But when I went there they gave me they passed it over and I was not able to say no again. So I took it and when I took it I smoked the past path I did a cough and they laughed at me they mocked me that you don't know these things so now I have to show them that I know and that's how I got into bang and as time went on I got addicted I got addicted to a point that now I started the boycotting classes I could not attend classes lectures were not very much necessary to me and as time went on I thought of quitting studies In my second year the first semester the second semester I was already addicted because every time in the morning the friends that I was hanging with could smoke some weeds then go to the lectures now for me I didn't have self control so I could smoke and when they want to go to the lectures I could just feel like I don't feel like going to lectures I just relaxed the determination, the zeal to do studies was now coming out of me just relaxing I couldn't take a nap even the whole day just sleeping and in the next same now actually I was just thinking about money how can I get money how can I be a millionaire I was just thinking about and I was wasting time so the drug, the habangi alcohol and everything I was using diverted my focus so that education is just a waste of time at the end of the day what matters is the money you have so that's when I was introduced into pendling I became a drug pendler I started selling bang in the university and I got a lot of money and during that time actually it was by guns grace by now I should be or I could be behind bars in prison because when I was at the peak of selling bang that's when a mind came that I should leave the university so I left the campus and went back home I could not stay at home because my parents could be curious why are you here where a lot of others are in school so I went to some slums around Merutown called Majengo and I hired a small house and that's why I started my business of pendling bang so I continued pendling, smoking and so many crowds of friends and I continued pendling, smoking I became so addicted that when I pedaled with the bang as a wait for the clients to come I could just be smoking and per day I could smoke over 20 rolls of bang that's where now my things started to go away I became confused I could not take showers I became dirty I could walk up and down in town sometimes even without shoes now the friends that used to hang around with when they saw the change of my behaviors they started to isolate themselves from me so I was not left alone addiction it's a brain disease it is a complex condition that is manifested through use of drugs and the substances despite their harmful consequences so now these things are harmful to me but I still want more the more I get the more I want it has come to a point there is none to use so that's a time now when I hanged and hanging means I can't reason anymore I can't think I can't do anything without having to get something to psych me to make me feel high after some time when the friends left me I had no one to take care of me I didn't have money to pay the rent I had to go back home because home is always the best I went home and there is one thing I always thank God for my parents they did something that changed my life when I went back home they didn't judge me they didn't chase me away instead they welcomed me I said nothing had happened I said I am normal and they gave me food I was so hungry but I was not having even appetite so I could just take a little then go they couldn't come and try to share with me or ask me what's up but I was at the social I could not say anything I could not talk to them I was just in my own world there is a time I contemplated suicide because of hallucinations I could hear people calling me saying Chris today we want to kill you we will cut your fingers one by one then we cut your legs then we cut your neck slowly then I could think should I really wait for this torture it's better I throw myself at the bridge and die asap instead of waiting for this torture so those are the hallucinations that I was experiencing so that night the hallucinations were so devastating actually there were men who were ironed to kill me in their hallucinations and they were given machine guns and they all came and surrounded my house and when they surrounded my house they started shooting when I had given up and my store was hover that was my turning point that is when God himself intervenes actually why it not divine intervention I could not be where I am today I could not be alive today that's when God took me and I woke up and went into my box and a box in my house and after opening the box there are 4 things that I found in my box that changed my life the first thing that I found was my adimation letter to Agaton University so I just took it and when I saw it I could not believe it Crispin Muirigi adimated to do bachelor of hearts in sociology and philosophy then I was like when? I was in the university the memory was gone about education and everything so I was like in the university so that brought some focus again it brought some challenge that you should not be where you are so when I looked at myself I was so untidy, dirty then I was like in the university look at where I am so those were two different people so the next thing that I saw was my transcript my first year transcript I performed excellently sociology and got an A's B's then I was like I was even performing like this so as I continued the other thing I saw was a photo a photo that you are taken with a student leadership from the vice chancellor the dean of student the registrars, the lecturers, professors and the student leadership you were in suits man and then I was like man was I sharp like this those things gone and purposely put them there so that they can bring me back to my senses and the fourth thing that I saw was a Bible I saw a Bible and not because I was discouraged I was hopeless I opened the Bible by the way I did not go in a rehabilitation center I was rehabilitated by the one of God any time the addiction it I opened the scripture I read two verses then prayed God helped me and that spiritual therapy did that difference in my life because that night when I got into the house the first thing I did I sat and my parents were like why have you come from because now I am shaped I am in a suit what happened so now I narrated to them they have been to Kobo and I want to go back to the university are you serious I told them yes I want to go back to the university first of all forgive me for wasting your resources your reputation even people couldn't always laugh at you saying that your son is western your son has become a drug addict they are self esteem was really affected because of my behaviors so I was very most full and asked them please forgive me because they forgive me and my dad asked me to plan for a day when he couldn't take me back to the university and I told him this week I'm okay and so it was like on a Tuesday so he told me prepare and on that day we shall go back so he came we woke up very early we went all the way to Nakuru in Joro we got to the university I followed up my registration he gave me 24,000 and I got a slip I registered and got in the system the form of friends I really had to come out of them I went to the band company that's what made me to succeed and God intervened I got a family in Nakuru a family that just hosted me so I stayed in that family for two years without paying rent without buying food and that's why I started and I graduated in the year 2015 the effects of drug abuse are so many the first one is that it will affect your health because of health effects the second one is that your dreams will become invalid you can never achieve your dreams anymore you live in a life of not a real life it's like a fiction you are just there the other thing is it affects your social life you don't interact with the people you become an antisocial being and when you are antisocial how can you succeed in life you can't because you have to interact with the people so now it will start taking you down and down and down the fourth is that it is a killer it will kill you it will kill you spiritually because it is a sin it is corrupting the body it is the temple of the Holy Spirit so it will kill you physically as well and socially mostly many rehabilitation centers they have the treatment aspect which I don't dispute it has worked for many but the spiritual aspect is very vital though in some rehab centers treatment is given the higher percentage but the spiritual is given a little percentage that is why you find so many after being distanced they go and relapse they go back to the alcohol they go back to the cigarettes they go back to the drugs because they are not surrendered to God they are not surrendered their lives to God to that higher power that has the ability to deliver so I challenge some rehabilitation centers that are only embarking on treatment passing that they shouldn't work out spiritual therapy because that is what for me helped me and that is what can help anybody because addiction is a spiritual problem it's not a physical problem it's more of mind, it's more of belief it's more of trust I've written a book I've been writing a book about drugs because for me to reach out to the whole country, to the whole world it may be difficult but through writing someone can read and can get some inspiration can get some hope that they can be able to change my journey out of drugs by Crispin Muiriki Kedengi when you look at this cover page it's our highway of life a journey, we are all in a journey and as you can see here they are bars that are old and captive by drugs but at the hand here there is light there is light that is Jesus Christ who is the son of righteousness so he is the one who gave me hope and removed me from these chains and now I'm free free now they can find it in bookshops it will be supplied in all bookshops in this country they can get it at the textbook center they can also get it at the national library and read from there with the time by God's grace I will also put them in the amazon they can read it from there I want to begin an initiative of reaching out to many young people whereby we will come together those that have been addicted and have been able to overcome so we can now move out to empower and to motivate those that are still into addictions to know that they can overcome addiction is the worst thing that can happen in your life and sometimes we get into addictions without our knowledge whether we are curious about drugs we try them and the first time you try them they get hold of you and every time I want to quit it becomes difficult for you I was there maybe you are watching and already addicted and you have given up my hand advice to you or my encouraging ones to you is that for sure you can change you can quit from drugs and substance abuse it is possible