 Five questions a narcissist simply cannot answer when you are in a relationship with someone It's good to take an interest in them. It's good to want to know more about them And it's good for them to be curious about you There should be a sense of openness There should be an acceptance of or receptiveness to change or new ideas There should be a lack of secrecy and concealment where you can share who you are and They can share who they are and do you combine combine your resources To encourage your interest and enthusiasm in each other as time goes by That is how a relationship grows into something healthy and functional But narcissists do not want to be involved in a collaborative effort They don't want to work with you to complete a task or achieve a goal They want you to be under their authority and control They want to be the person who is admired for their courage achievements and qualities They want to be the person who knows everything the person who is always right So they cannot be honest with you They cannot collaborate with you They have to be superior to you. They have to have influence and authority over you So they cannot reveal too much about themselves They cannot disclose their true character or motives They always have to premeditate what they're going to say or do Everything has to be thought out beforehand So there is certain information that you will not be able to access from the narcissist Because it would require them to be truthful and sincere Which is something that they cannot do They have to simplify themselves to provide this false image of sophistication So they cannot be honest with you They cannot be open or vulnerable Which is why they would have difficulty answering one of these following questions one What has caused you the most pain in your life? If you ask a narcissist this question They won't be able to answer you directly They will bring up some situation where they didn't like someone They will act like it doesn't bother them They will make it seem like there was something wrong with that person They cannot admit that they've endured struggles or pain Instead they blame other people They have to portray this image of being strong and in control As though they have overcome the problems and difficulties that other people have presented to them They will present this narrative as though other people have wounds, but they don't Which really doesn't add up Because if they didn't have any wounds Why would they be so unkind, spiteful and unfair? Why would they be so vicious and aggressive? Why would they be so offensively impolite and bad-mannered? They would have had to have learned these behaviors from somewhere They don't realize that it means that they have been affected or wounded by something Instead they believe that to display their strength They have to deny any vulnerability They have to act like it's beneath them They have to act like you're the only one that has weaknesses When a weakness is actually a strength in a healthy relationship Why can't you admit any of your faults and mistakes? Why can't you admit your flaws and imperfections? When the narcissist makes a mistake They cannot own it They cannot accept that they made a wrong decision or judgment They cannot accept that they misinterpreted something If they cannot deny that the mistake exists They will just blame you or someone else They are so defensive that you will never get to know who they are on the inside They cannot talk about their faults and mistakes They cannot be open about their flaws or imperfections And they cannot be vulnerable Free Why are you so threatened by my differences? If you display a sense of individuality or free-thinking If you interpret things differently than they do If you have different ideas or preferences They see it as a threat They see it as something that is likely to put them at risk of danger or harm Because they lack empathy They don't understand that other people can have their own ideas and preferences They don't understand that other people can have their own way of viewing the world They cannot share your feelings or experiences They cannot put themselves in your shoes They cannot see life from your perspective They have no interest in your thoughts or feelings They have no interest in hearing anyone else's perspective So any difference of opinion or way of life will threaten them Because they no longer feel like they're the center of attention They no longer feel like they know what's right or what's best They have no interest in your differences Because they always have to be right They always have to be the center of attention They believe that there can only be one correct opinion Whether it's something to do with politics or religion Or how you dress or where you want to travel They have a fixed opinion for every situation And they never take an interest in your opinion They believe that their opinion is the only one that matters They believe that they've got it all figured out They already know how life is meant to be So if you have a different opinion It must be wrong It must be unrelated to what is being discussed or considered For In what ways do you need to grow and change If you ask the narcissist this question Their answer would probably have something to do with making more money Or buying a nicer house or car They can't look at themselves And see that they need to grow or change anything about themselves Because they see it as though That would mean there's something wrong with them They are shame-based people who do everything they can to avoid reflecting on their shame So they have to see themselves as being perfect As though there's nothing they need to change They might tell you that they've already changed many things in the past But if you try to explore what it is That they've actually done to work themselves You will never get a direct or honest answer They don't feel the need to change or improve anything about themselves They expect everyone else to change to accommodate them Five If I cause you so much distress and annoyance Why do you want to be around me? Whenever the narcissist is around you You will notice that they're constantly under so much mental and emotional strain They're always angry or frustrated about something And yet they're always around you They're always there to criticise you And the reason for that Is because it makes them feel better about themselves It makes them feel superior They need conflict They need constant arguments and disagreements Because it gives them that opportunity to feel superior These are questions that the narcissist simply cannot answer They cannot be open or honest with you And they cannot be vulnerable So no matter how much time you spend with them You'll never really know anything about them All you will have by the end of it It's a long list of things that they don't like Thank you for watching I hope this video ends with you Please like, comment, share and subscribe If you would like to donate My PayPal link is in the video description Coaching inquiries You can email me at coaching.narchsurvivor.uk Thank you for watching and I'll talk to you soon