 Colgate dental cream to clean your breath while you clean your teeth and help stop tooth decay and Luster cream shampoo for soft glamorous Carasable hair bring you our miss Brooks starring Eve Arden Once again for another comedy episode of our miss Brooks under the direction of Al Lewis Well in the years our miss Brooks has been teaching English at Madison High School Her principal Osgood Conklin has made his own appraisal of her worth now whenever a position of responsibility Is open at Madison miss Brooks is the first name that pops into mr. Conklin's mind that so he can pop it right out again Oddly enough though He did put me in charge of Madison's Christmas Drive for second-hand clothing I discussed my new duties with my landlady over breakfast last Friday, but Connie Christmas is only ten days off Why did mr. Conklin wait until now to start his clothing drive? I guess he couldn't make up his mind about one important item. Mrs. Davis What's that whether he should organize the teachers to get clothes for the needy or organize the needy to get clothes for the teacher? But it is a good cause. What are you donating Connie? I'm giving an old dress of mine, Mrs. Davis, but you're the head of the drive is one dress enough I was going to give two Mrs. Davis But I remembered a board of education rule that says a teacher can't appear in public in a slip Well, I'm going to help out too Connie. I've got my donation right on this chair. Oh, that's very nice of you Mrs. Davis I couldn't decide whether to give my old bathrobe or my old overcoat to the drive But I finally made up my mind here you are dear say this bathrobe isn't pretty good condition That's the overcoat Well, I better get ready to leave Walter Dentons picking me up soon Before you go Connie. Do you still plan on doing your Christmas shopping this afternoon? Oh, yes indeed, Mrs. Davis I've got the 25 dollars I saved up this year right in this envelope Good. I made out a little Christmas list of my own I figured that with you being downtown anyway and me having so many things to do around the house You wouldn't mind making a few simple purchases for me. Oh, I'll be glad to Mrs. Davis. What do you want me to get? I've got the names and the presents all itemized Connie and here's 25 dollars I've saved up how many presents do you want me to get just for the immediate family My sister Angela my brother Victor a couple of cousins. It only comes to 12 gifts altogether Are you sure you don't mind doing my shopping for me Connie? Not at all Mrs. Davis. I just have one problem What's that? Who will I get to do mine? It was very nice of you to secure these old clothes from your friends and neighbors Walter You must have put in quite a lot of effort into this drive. First sweet charity in you. I'd bust a gut Please the word is burst But how do you like my contribution Miss Brooks? It's lovely Walter. Some old lady will be delighted with this lace shawl That's my old sweatshirt I guess some lots took a taste of it some laws left a taste of it Thanks for the contribution. Well, that's not all I'm doing for your drive. Miss Brooks Wait till you see the headline in the school paper today the monitor. What does it say? It says Miss Brooks needs clothes desperately Does that sound urgent enough miss Brooks urgent sounds like I was caught backstage age at a burlesque show And I appreciate your interest in this drive Walter and if there's ever anything I can do to reciprocate There is miss Brooks. You see I haven't bought Harriet Conklin her Christmas present yet And I thought maybe you could make a suggestion. Well, what kind of a present do you have in mind? Well, I want something that appears luxurious without being excessively opulent There's something steeped in gentility rather than touched by famboans In a word, it should be a gift that conveys to its recipient all the ardor and sincerity of its meticulous donor How much do you want to spend a buck and a quarter? Why don't you just send her your description of what the gift should be like? I'll try and help you out though. Walter. I'm doing my Christmas shopping this afternoon. Maybe I'll get an idea Miss Brooks, did you say that you're going shopping today? I get the feeling that yes would be a fatal answer here But yes, Walter, I am. Well, what a fortunate coincidence. Now, what could be simpler than to leave the selection of Harriet's present up to you? But Walter, I've got so many- You'll be passing the store counters anyway, Miss Brooks And who has a finer taste than you have? Who has a better sense of values and eye for beauty? Walter, you ought to know me well enough by now to realize that flattery will get you somewhere I hope you can do it. Oh, I can't think of anyone. I'd rather have select presents for Harriet and my mother Well, I figured, wait a minute. Who raised? It'll be a cinch, Miss Brooks. Well, my mother is very easily pleased That's obvious Those women and their desires better than you do. And while you're there, you can get my father's present too Why, Walter, you're implying that I know men and their desires too Do you know men? Oh, Miss Brooks, when it comes to men, no one even comes near you Don't rub it in Here, Miss Brooks, take this five-dollar bill and put it in your bag. All right, Walter Oh dear, I forgot my bag. I'll just put it in this envelope with the other money I'm sure grateful for this favor, Miss Brooks. I know you wouldn't do this for just anybody You're right, Walter. This year, I'm doing it for just everybody Hi, hello, Mr. Boynton. What brings you to first-year English? Miss Brooks, I've got something for you. Well, it took you long enough to find it out Oh, he has clothes Yes, I brought some things in for the drive Something of mine in a suit of Mr. Conklin's. He asked me to bring it in before your first class starts Oh, we've got minutes yet, Mr. Boynton. Just put them down with the rest of the thing Okay Hey, that's quite a stack you've got there. I know I've been dieting Oh I wish I could have given more to the Christmas drive than I did, Miss Brooks I think you've made a splendid contribution, Mr. Boynton. You do? Some shivering derelict will be tickled with those tennis shorts Those are slacks, Miss Brooks. It's just the way they're folded I'd like to have given a suit like this one. Mr. Conklin donated This still has plenty of wear in it. It does seem to be in pretty good shape I'll say it does why with a little fixing here and there a few alterations, a good cleaning and pressing Get that look out of your eye. He'd recognized it on you in a minute By the way, where's your jacket? Well, this bundle was pretty heavy. So I left it in the lab I can work better this way if you'll forgive my shirt sleeves Now can I help you sort these clothes? Oh, no, thanks, Mr. Boynton. They'll do that at the mission They're sending a truck for the stuff around lunchtime. At least I hope it gets here by then I don't want to get tied up this afternoon. I have a lot of Christmas shopping to do Oh, I see. Miss Brooks, could I ask you something? I do. I mean, why, of course, Mr. Boynton You say you're going to do your Christmas shopping this afternoon What in the world gave you that idea? It just said so Me in my big mouth. Well, I am going to shop, Mr. Boynton, but I don't I'm a fortunate coincidence. I've got to clean up my lab today and well, if you're going to be downtown anyway What would be simpler than to leave the selection of my parents' gifts to you? Mr. Boynton, I simply won't have time. I'm sorry Miss Brooks, you'll be passing the store counters anyway, and who has finer taste than you have Who has a better sense of values or an eye for beauty? Well, who indeed. I can't think of anyone who would know better what my parents and my Aunt Maddie and Uncle Fred would like Aunt Maddie and Uncle Fred They're cousin Liza's parents. Oh, she's on the list too right after Mike and Danny, my twin nephews Well, what about your boy scout troop? Don't you want me to get presents for them? Will you have time? Sure, I stay open late during the holiday Look, Mr. Boynton, I'll get as much of your shopping done as I possibly can. Oh, fine Here's the list, Miss Brooks, and and here's twenty dollars Oh, I'll just slip it into this envelope with Mrs. Davis's and Walters and my money Walter and Mrs. Davis have money in there too? Yes, they've also subscribed to the Brooks shopping service Now I've got to get over the home economics room. The kids in there were supposed to collect some stuff for the drive too I'll give you a hand, Miss Brooks. I'll take it First I'd better put this envelope in my desk Oh dear, it's locked and I've left the key at home in my bag Would you mind putting the envelope in your trouser pocket, Mr. Boynton? Well, this is a trifle embarrassing, Miss Brooks, but I'm afraid I've got holes in all my pockets I'm still a batchly, you know I know, I know I mean, that's easily remedied, Mr. Boynton Of course it is. While we're in the home economics room, you can sew up the pockets That's not what I had in mind, but it's a start Meanwhile, I'll just put this envelope in the breast pocket of Mr. Conflint's suit on top of this pile It'll be safe here for a few minutes. Well, it's safer than carrying it around, I guess All set. Come on, Mr. Boynton. We're off to get domestic I hope they've got a nice batch of stuff in there. Mr. Conflint expects us to pass But there's no sign of Miss Brooks. I guess the people from the mission got here sooner than she expected I guess so. Well, come on. Let's haul this stuff out to their truck But Walter, don't you think we should consult Miss Brooks before we take it? Why bother her about it? She knows where it's going Besides, we're saving her the trouble of carrying this stuff out herself Well, if you think so, Walter Believe me, when Miss Brooks finds out what we've done for her, she'll thank us till she's blue in the face Wash your teeth with cold gate Water toothpaste While it cleans your teeth Coal gate toothpaste Change your breath Water toothpaste While it cleans your teeth Coal gate dental cream cleans your breath while it cleans your teeth And the Coal Gate way stops tooth decay best More than two years research showed the Coal Gate way of brushing teeth right after eating Helped stop more decay for more people than ever before reported in dentiferous history Yes, the Coal Gate way stopped tooth decay best Better than any other home method of oral hygiene No other dentiferous, ammoniated or not has proof of such results And you should know that Coal Gates while not mentioned by name Was the one and only toothpaste used in the research on tooth decay Recently reported in Reader's Digest So always follow the Coal Gate way to clean your breath While you clean your teeth and stop tooth decay best Brush your teeth with Coal Gates Coal Gate dental cream it cleans your breath Water toothpaste While it cleans your teeth And the Coal Gate way stops tooth decay best Well when I got back to my room and discovered the absence of Mr. Conklin's suit Containing 75 dollars belonging to Walter, Mrs. Davis, Mr. Boynton and me I was fit as the old expression goes to be tied The suit itself wasn't worth it anywhere near 75 dollars In fact no suit of Mr. Conklin's is worth that much money even with him in it But my problem now was getting it back And in my first free period I headed for the biology lab to consult Mr. Boynton Good morning, Mrs. Brooke Oh, oh it's you Mr. Conklin You startled me Really? But I addressed you in quite a well modulated tone I guess that's what startled me That is, I didn't see you sidle out of your office I don't sidle, Ms. Brooks There's absolutely no necessity for me to pussyfoot through the halls of Madison Oh I know it's not a necessity Mr. Conklin It's sort of a luxury I'm a little upset this morning, sir, about the clothing drive But I understand you've done a splendid job In fact I stepped out here to congratulate you on vindicating my confidence in you Well that's very nice Mr. Conklin but I really It didn't take me long to select the right person to head the Christmas drive, Ms. Brooks The moment the idea of old clothes hit me I thought of you I was a natural all right Of course I gave other members of the faculty my careful consideration too But it wasn't long before I said to myself Osgood, Ms. Brooks is your man Isn't it funny that's how Mr. Boynton feels about me too Look Ms. Conklin, there's something I've got to do when I Of course I wouldn't keep you from your work for the world Especially such charitable work, Ms. Brooks If more of us could realize what genuine satisfaction the spirit of giving evokes The world would be a brighter place Well I'm brightening my little corner like mad This is a great thing we're doing, Ms. Brooks, giving to our fellow man This is the true Christmas feeling And we must all give, give, give until it hurts It hurts, it hurts Please Mr. Conklin, you excuse me I wouldn't think of detaining you another minute Oh before you go, how did you like my contribution to the drive? Wonderful Mr. Conklin, it's a very nice suit I'll say it was nice, and it still had several years' wear in it I just bought it in 46 1946? I mean, you can tell it's quite new Outside of a few battle scars it hardly looks secondhand Battle scars? Yes, it's like the time you spilled a bottle of ink on it Not all of the ink could be removed Oh but that wasn't even noticeable Mr. Conklin No, no it wasn't After I had the suit dyed from brown to blue However that suit always held something for me It's loaded for me That's what I've got to find out about Mr. Conklin You see, I left something in the pocket And well I've just got to get back that suit But you can't do that Ms. Brooks Once I've made a donation I never take it back How would it look to the folks at the mission? But there's no way for them to tell your suit from any of the others Oh but there is, my name is stenciled into the lining Not that I wanted anyone to know I was giving, of course You just didn't want anyone not to know Oh Daddy, there's a call for you in your office, will you get it? I'll call them back Harriet But it's Mother, she says it's urgent With your Mother it's always urgent Probably wants me to bring home a paper You'd better talk to her Mr. Conklin I'm going in to see Mr. Boynton about our predicament Very well Ms. Brooks, but remember It is better to give than to receive That may be Mr. Conklin But if I may show off my background in English literature There's another famous parable which goes As good as it is to give It's better to get back that which ain't yours to give What a fuss to make over a few dollars Some people are just mercenary I guess Hello Yes Martha, what is it? Have I had your necklace repaired yet? I don't remember you're giving it to me What? You put it in the pocket of my blue suit Wednesday night Martha, was that my brown dyed blue suit? It was, but I donated that to the Christmas clothing drive today And that necklace had a genuine opal in it I've got to get it back I'm not excited No I No Now don't give me that bull about charity I'll get that suit back if I have to rip the mission apart with my bare hand Glad I caught you before you went to lunch Mr. Boynton I was just cleaning up the lab Ms. Brooks, what's the trouble? Mr. Conklin's suit has been picked up and delivered to the mission That's nothing to get excited about, it's supposed to go there isn't it? Yes, but the money is still in it, I don't know what to do No no, take it easy Ms. Brooks, what money is still in it? The shopping money, mine, Mrs. Davis's, Walters and yours I must have tripped over the stool What time are they going to distribute this clothing Ms. Brooks? This afternoon Mr. Boynton, we've just got to get down to that mission and get the suit back Well are you sure you could identify Mr. Conklin's suit? With the things I've spilled on it, if I can't identify it, it'll identify me How are we going to go about getting it? Well we'll simply park outside the mission and watch every person who leaves the premises In that way we're bound to see who walks out with Mr. Conklin's suit on The rest is up to you What do I do? Pick his pocket while he waits for a bus? Please Ms. Brooks, we'll devise some sort of scheme on the way downtown and meanwhile let's let's be calm about it, it isn't the end of the world even if we fail to recover the money Heaven for fend Look through this mission window for 10 minutes now Ms. Brooks, have you seen Mr. Conklin's suit yet? No, but I spotted the dress I donated and I've been following its progress What's happened to it? It's been rejected three times Say, isn't that Mr. Conklin's suit heading for the door? Alone? Oh you mean on that little man? Yes, I think it is, you better get on the other side of the door Oh don't worry Ms. Brooks, I'll do my part to help get it back, good luck Pardon me my good man May I speak with you for just a moment? Yeah It's about that suit you've got on, are you quite satisfied with it? Yeah Yeah? Yeah but look at the way it fits, if I were you I'd take it back at once Well do you want me to do go around in my underwear? Yeah, I mean you could get a better one Now there's no reason why you shouldn't do every bit as well as this man coming toward us now I'm sure he got his suit in the mission Pardon me bud, but did you get that suit at the counter inside? Yeah It's contagious You say that's a mission suit you've got on Well sure, I just got it Boy were you jipped What do you mean to say you wouldn't like to look like he does? If I wanted to look like he does I wouldn't have turned in the suit they're burning Well I didn't want to mention this but I guess I'll have to Do you know who wore that suit before you as recently as last Wednesday? Who? I don't want to come right out and say but Well the fellow had his hands crossed on his chest with a lily in them A stiff, huh? Let's just say he wasn't very active Now don't you think you ought to trade that suit in for another one? After all its last owner might not like the idea of you're wearing it he might come back after it Maloney, I don't believe in that kind of stuff Miss Brooks, Mr. Boyden, I've got to talk to you at once Oh Mr. Conklin, what are you doing here? Well I've had a change of heart about my donation I'd like to get it back Boy what an Indian giver I don't believe I know you my good man Ferguson's the name Cosmo Ferguson How do you do? But Mr. Conklin why do you want your suit back? Because of something that my wife put into a Ferguson you're wearing my suit What do you mean your suit? I happen to have worn that garment as recently as last Wednesday Holy cow it's a stiff What's that? This lady said the suit was on a dead guy last Wednesday I must have caught you while you were dozing Mr. Conklin Look look I've just got to have that suit back it has a sentimental attraction for me Be a good fellow and return it Nothing doing I was handed this suit and told it was mine to keep Wait I'll get you another suit please Mr. Ferguson be reasonable No Oh come on Cosmo you don't want that old suit Of course you don't Give it here Take your hands off of me pompous or there'll be trouble That's the idea you and him fight I'll hold your coat I'm not gonna fight I'm just going Oh wait wait wait I'll give you five dollars for that suit I'm staying I'll give you six dollars for it Ms. Brooks why are you bidding for this suit? It's got a sentimental attraction for me too I've spilled more on that suit than any of your others I'll give you 10 dollars Well 18 19 Gee and I always thought they just sang songs admission I'll bid 20 dollars 25 30 Mr. Conklin did you bid 30 dollars for this old suit? Yes I guess I did Let's make that 27 22 17 11 Wait a minute now I accept the lady's previous offer of 25 But how do you know she has the money to pay for it? Have you? I will have as soon as I get that coat Just a minute just a minute I'll give you 25 dollars and the suit I've got on for that one It's a deal Let's go inside and change We can do that later Let's change coats immediately Okay You know I might parlay this mission business into a clothing factory Miss Brooks Hi everybody Walter Well I'm all through helping out in the mission How'd you like the way I handle things? Oh you were divine Walter But I can't talk to you right now There's a matter of 75 dollars I've got to recover Mr. Conklin now that you've changed coats Would you mind looking through the pockets please? That's just what I am doing Miss Brooks and I'd better find It's not here But it was in the inside breast pocket Mr. Conklin No it was not It was in the side pocket Oh you're both wrong Harriet and I went through the pockets Before we turned it into the mission people We found Mrs. Conklin's necklace and all our shopping money Miss Brooks What? Ferguson Give me back that coat Not a chance I'm getting out of here You people are all deaf But my 25 dollars The new suit Ferguson wait Mr. Conklin Why is he running after that bum? You tell him Miss Brooks All I can say is It's definitely better to give than to get Especially where Cosmo's going to get it And there's our Miss Brooks returns in just a moment But first Dream girl beautiful luster cream Tonight? Yes tonight Show him how much lovelier your hair can look After a luster cream shampoo Luster cream world's finest shampoo No other shampoo in the world Gives you K-Dumit's magic blend of secret ingredients Plus gentle lanolin Better than a soap Better than a liquid Luster cream is a dainty cream shampoo Leaves hair three ways lovelier Fragmently clean Free of loose dandruff Listening with sheen Soft Manageable Even in hardest water Luster cream lathers instantly So gentle Luster cream is wonderful Even for children's hair Tonight? Yes tonight Try luster cream shampoo Dream girl dream girl Beautiful luster cream girl You owe your crowning glory to A luster cream shampoo And now once again here is our Miss Brooks Well Cosmo didn't get very far Because Mr. Conklin Hit him with a flying tackle Recovered his coat and the money and left But Mr. Boynton and I felt so sorry for Cosmo That we chipped in and gave him two dollars Gee thanks folks Oh you're very welcome Cosmo Merry Christmas Now if you'll excuse me I've got to get on with my Christmas shopping Oh are you going to do your Christmas shopping now Miss Brooks? Yes I am Well if you're going to be in the stores anyway Would you take this two dollars and get something for me? Well what do you want Cosmo? A set of brass knuckles and Mr. Conklin's address Oh Why I'm surprised at you Cosmo Spending two dollars for brass knuckles For forty nine cents you can get a hammer I'm gonna get a tune in next week to another Our Miss Brooks show Brought to you by Luster Cream Shampoo With soft glamorous caressable hair And Colgate Nettle Cream to clean your breath While you clean your teeth and help stop tooth decay Our Miss Brooks starring Eve Arden Is produced by Larry Burns written by Al Lewis With the music of Wilbur Hatch Mr. Boynton is played by Jeff Chandler Mr. Conklin by Gail Gordon Others in tonight's cast were Jane Morgan Dick Crenna Gloria McMillan and Polly Bayer You want a beauty soap for a beauty bath And your bath becomes a beauty bath When you change to proper cleansing with palm olive soap While bathing with this beauty soap Brings you the full beautifying effects Of palm olives mild and gentle leather Proved by doctors to bring most women Lovelier complexions in just fourteen days Bath size palm olive is designed to give you Everything you need for all over beauty care Fragrance for daintiness Mileness for loveliness Purity for gentleness Big bath size for thriftiness So get big bath size palm olive So mild so pure so right for all of you If you like mysteries that are as full of Chuckles as chills Be sure to hear Mr. and Mrs. North Every Tuesday over this same network Don't miss the exciting and laughable adventures Of these amateur detectives Hear Mr. and Mrs. North every Tuesday night And be with us again next week at this same time For another comedy episode of Our Miss Brooks Bob LeMond Speaking Stay tuned now for Jack Many This is CBS The One of the Most Casting Systems