 We're so glad you joined us. We're going to be talking about feminism. There'll be no bra burning, though. Kissing and fighting. And that's just some of the topics. It's all sisters all the time. Sister to sister, so glad that you're with us today. I'm Kathy, our sisters. Corey, Roxanne, Flo, and Amy. We tackle the tough questions, real questions, from a biblical perspective. So you're going to love this. Girls, you ready? We're ready. We were born ready. You are born ready, Miss Amy. Listen to this question. Because I think you all are going to have something great for us. Feminism, Flo alluded to that. But does that devalue motherhood? Has the feminist movement. Duh. I really think that there is common ground with the feminist and the Christian, especially in Peter, when it says that women and men are equal heirs to the grace of God. And his spirit has been poured out on all flesh. And there is a part of parenting that's called attachment parenting that biology and psychology has embraced, which says that the female body was made. The biology supports the fact that child bearing and the psychology supports the fact of bonding with the child early in infancy. I think in the end the truth will prevail in triumph. What's interesting, have you ever heard feminism and Christianity put together like that? I haven't. Oh, absolutely. That's good. I think somewhere along the line equal rights turned into sameness. And I don't think that's what it's about. I think that we can have equal rights but still have very different roles as men and women. Are there crossovers? Yes, but I do think feminism has devalued motherhood. I do. For the very, I mean, just the very fact that women are getting married later and our bodies are only made to make babies for a certain amount of time. So that's why we're having so many fertility issues and women are having to fight their instinct, not all of them, but to want to be mothers because they have these careers and climb the ladder and fight equality. I just, I think it has devalued motherhood. Who's the movie star that wrote, I'm looking for my prince charming, every woman needs a prince. Okay, well, she's a big time. Yeah. I think, you know, growing up, my mom and dad were like, Amy, the sky's the limit. You can do anything, anything that you put your hand to is going to prosper. And so to have that down deep on the inside of you and then to grow up and be like, well, you can only be a stay-at-home mom saying that that's only success or just going into business's success. Why can't we be a great mom and a great business girl? Why can't we be whatever God has called us uniquely designed to be? But Amy, one group, one group honestly fights with the other group. It's terrible. When I, and I'm sure at home, you've experienced this or maybe you're identifying with what we're talking about. When I was the shop and save lady and I was in a grocery store at one time and a little girl was doing some homework on the bench and I said, oh, let me see what you're doing. And then the mother said, oh, I wouldn't think you would even know about homework because you're on TV. No, really. So I believe that women that stay home deserve the out of boy and deserve to be raised up and women that work go for it. You know, I think that a lot depends on you. Your perception is your reality. And so depending on what your perception and understanding about feminism is, it's going to be how you process it and how you walk it out. And so I really like how God just used Roxanne to bring some insight into it. I never thought of that. Yeah. And seeing how the two can coincide. But I also believe that my other sisters bought up some valid points and so I really think the perception of it is key because that's going to, it'll manifest in your walk. And it's important that, as the word says, this you ought to have done and not leave the other undone. And so we do need to not allow the spirit of oppression to come on us as women and define who we are according to the world standards. But we do need to not allow the world to dictate to us who we are. And I really feel that as women, that's a gift that we have. And we don't want that smothered out by the world. No. I was thinking about my daughter when she was like three years old and she was playing in her little house outside and she was serving us food and we said, oh, thank you. What a great waitress. She was, I'm not the waitress. I'm the girl that owns this place. That's right. And I was like, you know, it's in her to be a leader. But it's also in her to be a great mom. I have a picture. I have a picture of my daughter playing office. Now she did play house, but she loved to play office. Where'd she get that from? We play teacher. We play teacher, but I didn't want to be a teacher in no way. But what I would like to teach our children is to not use such foul language. What in the world is going on? The foul language on television that's permitted. That's the terrible, terrible part. So how do you think this has had an impact on our world right now? I think there's no question that we have been thoroughly desensitized. Oh, it's awesome. You know. And whether you do it in your home or not, it's penetrating their eargate via the media so many different ways. Television, music, all of that. And so, you know, my father used to have an expression, and it was an ignorant man's way of expressing himself is through cussing. I love that. That's the wisdom of flow. Yeah. Nice, nice. The flow zone. So when you lack vocabulary, you lack the ability to express yourself. You will resort or retreat to that manner of conversation. And it's certainly not becoming of us as Christians. And the Bible says, bad company corrupts good morals. That's right. So if you are exposing yourself to bad language, what is going to come into play? It's inescapable. It's in the movies. It's in the movies. It's on the TV. It's like on our normal family TV channel. It is. What they're allowed to say now that they didn't say when our parents were, and I was little, it's big difference, big difference. Life and death are in the power of the tongue. And they're really, they're designing their world with their words and these words of hate. And I think about my little son, Judah, he's six. He said, mom, I said five cuss words this week. I said the S word. And I said, what is the S word? He goes, stupid and shut up. I was like, I was like, what are you doing? Those bastard's kids. Those bastard's kids. Those stupid and shut up are okay. But not really, but kind of, you know, in this weird way. Oh, and you have to be so proud. You have to be so proud. I'm so proud of my children, too, but what do you do when your children move in together? What if you have a son and they move in together? And what do you do? The world is saying that it's okay. How old is too old to spank? I'm going to step in the middle of that as much as I can, because that's just a path that's probably not the healthiest path for them. But look at what's happened in the world. God talks about Jesus. The God says to us in Isaiah, come let us reason together. There's a point in your child's life where you do have to use a fair amount of reasoning with them. And I read an article at Christchurch, and it says, the American sociological review, which some people live together don't want to read. Disillusion rates of those who cohabit prior to marriage are nearly 80% higher than those who do not. We have to show them the facts, the statistics about what they're setting themselves up for. Failure? They feel like they have to live together to get to know each other. Right. We have to show them the facts, the statistics about what they're setting themselves up for. Failure? They feel like they have to live together to get to know each other, sleep together before they get married. Right. That mindset. I believe the world has prioritized things differently. And so even though we have the word, see we're committed, we've given our lives to the Lord and we are allowing the Lord the opportunity to work in us. We're yielded. But your children are still shaping. Their wills are still being shaped. Their spirit is still developing. They are influenced by the world a little more. Right. But they're seeing how they need to know each other before they get married. The thing people do not realize today, I think, is that we're all imperfect. There are going to be problems. Right. That's why the divorce rate is so high. As soon as a problem comes in, it's like, oh, we're not compatible. Do you want to agree with that? Does the audience agree? This is why. With applause. This is why. Thank you. This is why the divorce rate is so cuckoo. Out of way. The second man runs out. The seventh commandment. Do not commit adultery. Right. I like what Julie Smire said. She said, living together, sleeping together before marriage takes the wow out of the marriage. I like that. I like that. That's true. But I'll have another question for you. Marriage is a wow. Oh, Blake, this is our wow girl. Everything is a wow. What does it mean? This is a really good question too. Because to be in the world, but not of the world. I think about the verse in the Bible that talks about us being salt. Salt and to be a seasoning. Salt doesn't have to become the food. It is seasoning. You add the salt and it changes the food, not the salt. So that's what we're called to be. Cory, did you write that? I did. I love it. Yeah. Write that down. Write. Wait, they're going to applaud again. I thought of that in the car. I thought of that in the car. No, seriously. I just think that we can be, we are in the world. We can't hide. We're in it. And good flavor. But we are a good flavor. We are the flavor that God gave us. And we're all a little different flavor. Yeah. This old hymn or old gospel song I sang when I was little. Like, this world is not my home. No, no, no. Let's hear it. I can't remember it. Yes, you can. This old world is my home. Like, we're so journeying to get to our ultimate home. And while we're here, we're going to make a huge difference for Christ. And we're going to be His hands and feet on earth until we get to our ultimate destination, which is home in heaven. And we're not going to hide ourselves from the world. We're going to be out there in the world because Jesus loved the world. He gave His life for the world. So we're going to be in that world. But we're not going to let the culture penetrate us that it changes us in a negative way. Right. And I just want to be what Jesus is for. Not so much what Jesus is against. Right. And I know I've said that to us before. And yet, as Christians, we have a challenge. Flow. Well, I believe that we are ambassadors passing through. And I think an ambassador represents well where they come from. Right. And I agree with everything that has been said. I really believe that we cannot afford to lose our flavor. No. We cannot allow for our oil to go low and our light to go dim. That's right. Good. I like that too. Audience loves it. Audience loves it. I hope that you like what you've been hearing here on Sister to Sister. And don't go anywhere because we have some more great questions for you with great answers. Women, real from a biblical perspective. So stay right there. We'll be right back. Good to see you. Good to see you. Good to see you. Good to see you. Good to see you. Thank you for the studio audience today. They are fantastic. Yes. Love this next question. And I'm going to read the whole thing because I want you to understand it. Okay. Now this is about kissing before marriage. Flo alluded to that one too. Everyone knows the Duggar family, right? Okay. They're famous for their reality TV show. They have 19 kids and counting and they have great Christian faith. In a recent article, here's what they said. This is their dating rules. Okay. This is really tough. No kissing till marriage. Texting is okay, but you have to include your parents in on the text. Dear, dear, dear. And is this realistic? Is this realistic? What are your ground rules for your children dating and what is the best dating advice that you can give to anyone that is watching us today? I'm going to take those for my dating. For my kids. For your kids. My glorious chapter at all times include me in that group text. You and your boyfriend. When I looked at that article, it wasn't so much that the parents espoused that the children adopted it. And the parents permitted them to adopt it themselves, which I think is counterculture to what's going on. I do have a scripture for you guys. First, Timothy 5-2. Men treat older women as mothers and younger women as sisters with absolute purity. I love it. I'm putting it on my kids wall. Somebody tell Jimmy more about that. About the older women. Right, right. What is she? I think there is scriptural grounds for them to have this counterculture of what they believe in. And we as Christians can be supportive of what they are espousing because the girls themselves have adopted this. They're dating with a purpose. The purpose for marriage, not the purpose of performing sexual acts or appeasing their own desires. We're all saying good and right, but I just wonder what you're thinking at home. Because this is a situation, you're saying a counterculture. What is it realistic? Is this a question? When I was in high school, there was this book that was really popular in our youth group. It was called I Kissed Dating Goodbye. And I hated it because all the boys were swearing off dating and I'm like, come on, what are you doing this? Our audience knows that book. Do you guys know that book? Okay, so I hated it, but now that I have kids, I'm all like, give me the book. Give me the duggers' rules. All right, we're on that. Yeah, but come on. Didn't you like kissing? Yes. I liked kissing. I thought it was ridiculous. If I was a teenager, I would think these rules were ridiculous. I did too. But now I'm like, they're awesome. Some women whose bodies have been exploited or permitted their bodies to be exploited really need that confidence that a man is not after them for their own sexual desires. Well, all girls need that. Right. You know what? I don't think this is a debate as much as it is a discussion. And the thing of it is, is that we as believers, and that's what this real life, we're all Christians here. And of course, we want the best for our children and we want to give them the biblical principles and boundaries. And I believe that that's what the Duggars are attempting to do. I also, we also have to understand that, again, people have a free will. And so as a parent, my job is to help train my child and to train their will. I want them to be willing to be willing. You know what I'm saying? Right. And so I think, you know, we can set rules and boundaries and I think everybody, every decent parent does. We try. We try. But how to implement them, the children, the child has to be a willing participant. And I think you want the child understanding the value. Even some women don't understand the value of themselves. Right. And it's, my saying is always, if I'm a good thing, God's not going to give me an anything. And I don't have to settle. That's another. That's another. That's another. That's another. I love that. I love that. Even if you don't understand that, you become a bait for anything. So it's like, when the pressure is on, that let's go for, because a kiss stirs you. Now I'm not saying that, you know, I'm 100% in agreement with not kissing, but I understand the principle behind it is what I'm trying to get across. I'm kind of in love with the musical Oklahoma and Ado Annie saying a song. I'm just a girl who can't say no. Kisses is my favorite sport. And that's good. But when you're married. But when you're married. You just practice it. I say it's possible. Wait, your first kiss was like on the altar. You got married? Yes. Really? She told me that. I agree. With my own husband. How did it go? Oh wait a minute, wait a minute. That is a big, big applause for that. That's really good. But you know what? You just kissed me on the phone. I say, if you pay for the cell phone then you should be in on the text. That's all I have to say. Oh yeah. Okay now, what is the best parenting advice that has been given to you? Or that you would like to give to you? The best advice that I ever got was, I remember thinking, oh my family is too strict, they're too this or too that. At 18 I can move out and I can remember my grandmother looking at me and going, just remember you can always come back. Trust me, about two years later I was right back. But you know, I think that's really important, that they are shown we bear the ministry of reconciliation because they're going to mess up. I'm being tapped to stop so the other sisters can talk. First of all, that is my little secret. Oh sorry. I say this, children learn more from what we do than what we say. That's right. That's right. And I mean I have to bring a Bible verse in. I have to, Proverbs 27. Love it. I'm sorry, Proverbs 22.6 I'm cheating. Train up a child in the way should go and when he's old he won't depart from it. Amen to that. That's a good question because it's it's my secret tap. I am, I'm going to do more than tap. Next time. Here's what I want you to, here's what I want you to talk about. AYS adulteress. Oh my God. I love my sister so much. It was a love, it was a love tap. Love, love. It's going to be a love punch. Here's what I want to talk about because it is so in the news and so important. It's about the recent school violence. We experienced this in a big way. Your school district, Cory. Okay, so what do you tell your child if they're being bullied and do you fight back? Should you tell your child to fight back? I think this is such a hard question. It's a hard question because we've got to turn the other cheek verse but then you know my husband I've talked about this we're not, I don't think our kids are meant to be punching bags either you know and I don't know I want to know I need to know I don't think you teach your child to fight but you should teach them how and what I mean by that is all fighting all fighting is not physical right so and we're living in a day and it used to be you know it used to be in my time that you know if you fought somebody on the playground or whatever whoever got the best of whoever and that was it you were done now they're taking lives they have and words they have done away with that and so when that happens now you really need to get authorities involved whether it's the school principal whether it's the counselor maybe you can maybe you can sit down with a reasonable parent if you can find one I love what my son did and he came home he said hey mom I was saying who are you sitting by at lunch and he said who are you being bullied and so I was like how about we raise the kids that are going out to sit by the bullied kids and that's actually what the bullying programs in schools they teach the children now to support the person being bullied telling them that you can help someone else and children have to be careful parents need to know what their school policies say because it's a physical violence what's interesting and what I want the studio audience to know and our audience at home is Roxanne is an attorney but she is also on the school board of her local school but before we before we get out of here and get home you at home I want our girls to tell you what is the best gift that you've ever received and I think hanging around with pastors kids would be a great gift what do you think what do you have a superstar producer if I could share this poem my best gift was a poem from my husband for my valentine this is from Alan you left your home for sook your dreams you even changed your name but through the years I am the one who's never been the same you showed me how to laugh and cry you helped me learn to share and opened up a world of joy I never knew was there love must be blind it has been said for faults it should ignore and love me all the more. If my heart could reflect your soul as a mirror does a face, the world would marvel at the sight of beauty, truth and grace. Oh God, how I remain amazed that I should have this life for only I am blessed to claim Roxanne to be my wife. Oh my gosh. Oh my gosh. That is unbelievable. That is unbelievable. Beautiful. And so that's my favorite. That is amazing. I don't think that anyone could really top that particular gift. So I'm going to say we're going to be right back because Roxanne is coming again. Sister, sister, stay right there. Much for being with us here today on Sister to Sister and we never end without a scripture from Amy. Because the word is the most important thing, Romans 12 to in the voice that says, do not allow this world to mold you in its own image but instead be transformed from the inside out by the renewing of your mind. And as a result, you will be able to discern what God's will and whatever God finds good, pleasing and complete. I love that. Did you love that? I did. I love that. I hope you enjoy what we do here on Sister to Sister. And if you would like to contact us, it's very easy. S2S at ctvn.org. Facebook us, we're on Twitter, we're all about it. We have another saying here. It goes like this, as iron sharpens iron, so does the countenance of one woman sharpen the other. See you next time on Sister to Sister.