 First video of the year. I'd be lying if I Said this was the the first video of the decade I thought I was going to make and I wasn't sure if I wanted to kick off the decade and this year on my channel this way But the more I thought about it the more I realized there is no other way I wanted to kick off this year then to try and help more people Before I really get into it I want to say that all the revenue from this video all the revenue from anyone that may buy this book and we're gonna get to That there is an Amazon link down below for this book. I just want to say it now very important book to me There's an Amazon link down below It's a referral link and I will take that money and I will donate it to charity and then the video that is Releasing today right now at the same time as this one on my brand new channel Which I is is the first time I'm even mentioning this all the money that video makes on my new channel will also be donated to Charities what charities you may be asking? The same charities that I donated to in my live stream last year to raise awareness towards mental illnesses like depression and anxiety And so many others those charities being ones such as the American suicide prevention Foundation and the Trevor project you can find links to all of them below those where that's where I'll be Donating and what is this? Can you guys see this? This is the cuddle you want to give me right now you look ridiculous. Okay. You look sweet It was a very spur of the moment live stream where I wanted to raise $5,000 We smashed $5,000 in the first 30 minutes and we went on over the next 12 hours to raise $42,000 which equaled about $10,000 after fees and everything for all the four charities We were raising money for it was amazing. It was therapy for a lot of us I got to share a lot of my stories and hear a lot of your stories and help each other And I wanted to do more with that this year Obviously I was gonna do it again be stupid for me not to do it again But I wanted to do more I wanted to do something bigger and grander and what I have done is something I feel is really cool. You guys might remember if you watch my channel I reviewed super lucky tail recently where I got to go to playful studios and meet the people behind the game Well, a lot of those people actually connected with me and showed so much appreciation for everything I have done for mental health and shared their stories and when I told them I wanted to do another live stream They showed me this really awesome live stream set up that they have and they Suggested they asked they pleaded even for me to hold the live stream at their studio next time and that's what I'm gonna do because it is a Wonderful incredible studio. There's so much room. It's so spacious So I want to invite you into this stream Whoever you may be I am looking for content creators If you're watching this and you're a content creator with a platform where you would like to spread this awareness for mental health Please connect with me send me messages And if you're just a viewer a watcher someone that knows a content creator or follows someone just anyone That that spreads this awareness and is a voice Get them to message me or tell leave their comment down below with their names I want to get as many people that share this passion to join this live stream with me to all meet up at playful studios And do a 24-hour live stream where we raise as much money as we can for mental health for people who suffer with depression and anxiety I have a lot more planned. It's all going down this time. I'm gonna give more warning It's all going down on May 8th, and it's gonna go 24 hours into May 9th I'm gonna make sure that for at least some of it There is going to be an actual real therapist on hand that you can ask questions to We might have a system where you can call in or text in and talk to an actual therapist because that's a big thing I feel a lot of people are either too afraid to go and see a therapist or people just can't afford therapy It's expensive. So this could be a way of getting free therapy I'm going to pay out of my pocket for a therapist to be there to help you and to help people and we can And we can still share our stories But also just have a lot of fun people hanging out and having a great time while spreading this positivity and these messages that you are not alone that you are never alone and I know last year when we did this I was so down and depressed and when you were donating I feel maybe Possibly you were donating the show support to me and the situation I was in as much as you were donating to show all these people we were helping support So I want to implore you that even though I am in a better place this year and it's going to be a much more fun and positive event in itself There are still thousands millions of people out there that are doing much worse than they were last year that are doing as bad as I was Doing last year or worse definitely worse People that are suffering people that need help people that don't know how to get that help and just this Livestream might help them let alone the money that we raise So please we raised 42,000 last time the audience my channel You guys have grown and become an even bigger community We can crush that and I really want to crush that together and do something truly special together So yes, I need your help once again. Hey, is it my turn yet? Can I? Cut in there. Can I worm my way into this video? No, no, it's not because it's my time to talk about Supermarket as I said a book that's very important to me So you're gonna have to wait after you're done watching this video Make sure to check out the hottest freshest new youtuber on the scene with zero subscribers right now good to see you Not me. Oh man. What an amazing opportunity for this channel Which currently has zero subs to be shouted out by this channel with almost a million Wow that Never happens Yeah, well, this is awkward I cannot recommend this book supermarket enough the book is written by Bobby Hall who you might know is logic the artist who wrote Saying made the song one eight hundred two seven three eight two five five, which the song obviously Tackles suicide and depression in itself I mean that number that is the title of the song is the number for the national suicide prevention lifeline I think it's just brilliant too because that song has billions of views from people connecting with it And if they have me to remember that number They just have to remember the song title like Bobby slash logic is such an advocate for mental health And has become an inspiration of mine over the last year I actually didn't realize how much of an advocate he was until and this is a little bit of a humble brag after my Video I made last year. He inboxed me on Twitter and offered to send me his book which again tackles depression anxiety and mental illnesses And I really wanted to read it. Unfortunately. I saw his message like two months late if you're watching this one Bobby Sorry, it went to my message requests and by the time I replied Bobby had moved on with his life, which is fair So I just bought the book myself and I loved it from front to back I haven't read a book since my teenage years, but I couldn't put this thing down The book is mind-bending it says on the back that it's compared to fight club like someone else compared it to fight club But it definitely the whole time that I was reading it. It's hard to not make those comparisons But at the same time it's completely its own story. It's its own trip to experience the book follows a character called Flynn who is writing a book and that book that he writes throughout this book ends up being this book Following along with me and this character is dealing with a lot Emotionally experiencing his first panic and anxiety attacks and not really knowing what they are But for all the dark themes that does deal with it still manages to be a very exciting story And that's what I love about it so much if you have depression if you've gone through these things I feel like you can really relate with this book And if you haven't you can honestly learn what those things are like what it's like to experience having an anxiety attack A lot of it breaks the fourth wall to like because he is writing this book that you're reading Sometimes he will trip himself up as he's writing it and start thinking about what he is going to write in the book That you're reading and then he'll even apologize For reminding you that you are reading a book and taking you out of that experience But at the same time it adds to the experience Especially when you start thinking about the themes it deals with like these mental disorders like talking to yourself like Schizophrenia like that whole fourth wall breaking really works within the confines of this story that he's telling and yet As dark as it is It's really fun and obviously being compared to Fight Club You can kind of maybe gather the theme of that before you even go into the books like what is real and what isn't real while reading it I was loving it, but I kind of thought that I was predicting certain things I really thought I had it figured out and I really didn't have it figured out Flynn is a writer writing this book He wants to base his book in a supermarket So he gets a job working in a supermarket and the characters that he meets there are the characters that he starts To write into his book. I'm not gonna read it out I actually tried to do a whole video where I read out parts of the book But the video ended up being so stupidly long that I couldn't even edit it down to a normal amount for a video But on page 36 is where he really has his first big breakdown But then reading Bobby write these words on the page and it happens multiple times throughout the book where he writes something And I'm like that's me. That's I'm not that's not just me And I think that's why this book is so therapy to me It also taught me something about myself I didn't know and that's that I have a very hyper attentive mind this character of Flynn His mind is always racing all over the place and he can't chill out He's always thinking of a million things at once which is why he gets distracted and that ends up reminding you that you're even reading A book in the first place and in this book this character struggles with that and trying to be present in the moment and That had really taught me that I need to be more present in the moment I need to enjoy moments more. Yes, there's a lot going on. Yes. YouTube is going well for me Yes, I want to start a new channel. Yes There's a lot of things that I need to be done and can be done at any given time But there are just moments where you need to turn that off and just chill and learning that I had like and I never even thought about it Either I never thought about the fact that I always have a million thoughts in my head I just assumed that's how things were and I was able to try and control that over the last couple weeks By just taking a break and spending time with Kim again It's an incredible book that has a lot of twists and turns and I feel like a lot of you are gonna end up grabbing it So I don't want to ruin any of it I will say that the very first scene of the book like the very first thing you read the very first chapter is Essentially what happens right at the end of the book the main character Flynn is standing over a body of someone that he had Just murdered and he doesn't really seem to care and as you start to learn about Flynn that Situation makes no sense like why why that's not him So what got to that point is really what drives you forward in this book But there's so much that happens on each page that you just want to keep going this book aside I just want to recommend like Bobby Hall appreciation day logic in general as a person to be inspired by Because again his book obviously he's very passionate about spreading this awareness, but also through his music I mean that one song he has is incredible of course doesn't just stop at that song so much of his music reflects this too There's a song called wannabe which tackles depression and social media and getting likes and follows on your stuff And how that affects your mental health and if you don't get as much likes It's this guy or your friend it affects yourself worth his music is really freaking great So I can't recommend enough him as an artist, but listening through a lot of his songs And you might learn something about yourself or it might just be therapy for you read his book He's he's he's become an inspiration of mine again link below anything I earned from that affiliate link will be donated to American Suicide Prevention Foundation Again, this video will be donated and then that video that you're about to watch right hello, right? Hello, click on that video now that video will be donated if it even makes any money because I don't even know I think I'm monetized. I'm not sure. I think I have to get a thousand subs first To end this as I said, I already tried shooting this video a few times and I edited one completely and the end of that video I edited was very real and very raw and I'm gonna end this by playing that Finally, finally, and I've been putting off really been putting off this. Oh My god, this is why I put it off. I can't even say it Hmm This live stream this time will be dedicated in honor to Edgar and I talk about that more in that video. I Love you guys so much. Thanks so much Before I took my little break the channel had just hit 800,000 subscribers and I was like cool That's a good place to end It's a good break for a while and then I came back after not looking at the channel for like over a week and It had like 825,000 so If you're new if you're one of those new 25,000 There's a video might have been a bit much