 I remember each phase, approach anxiety. Who has ever had approach anxiety? Raise them high, I wanna see the armpits. Approach anxiety, okay? Still have it, but it's manageable. And I remember what that felt like when it wasn't manageable. When I see you guys in the clubs, training or otherwise, and I see you guys look at that set. And I see you guys look at her and want to approach and then you start fidgeting. And you don't know what to do. And you look back at your friends, and I'm across the room and I know what you're saying to them. Oh, she's not my type. Oh, she's not hot enough. Oh, you know, she's talking to her friend. She's busy to give herself all these excuses. Don't get me wrong, I gave those exact same excuses. That's why I know what you guys are saying. And I remember what that's like. There were times, for all of you guys that feel bad, every time you don't approach a set, there were times when months at a time I would be out three to four nights a week. Three to four nights a week. Four hours every night. What is that, like 16 hours, can you believe me? 16 hours a week. And not one set I opened. Cause I couldn't get over that fear. I looked at the set, I psyched myself out, and I could not get over that fear. So I remember what that's like. I remember stalling. Who has ever stalled before. Ran out of things to say. I remember that. I remember how long that took. How painful that was. When you walk up to a set, you say, whatever your grand opener is, and then she says hi, and you say, ah, what's your name? Where are you from? And you bombard her with questions. Best scenario, worst scenario, you just stared her. And then you turn with your tail between your legs, and you walk back, hopefully to your friends. I remember what that was like. I remember being in that friend zone. I remember being in that area where I could finally talk to a girl. I could finally make conversation, which she only thought of me as a friend. Every single set only thought of me as that friend cause I didn't know how to get sexual. I didn't know how to flirt with girls. I didn't know the difference between having a regular conversation and having a flirty conversation. Every phase that you guys will go through, I've been in those phases, and more importantly, I remember what it's like and I remember how I got through it. How I fixed it. And you know what? I even remember the times when I lost faith. And some of you guys, hopefully not in this room, but some of you guys have or will lose faith in the process. You'll go through it and you'll go through a plateau period where you're not getting better. And you'll say to yourself, maybe this isn't real. Maybe we're just fooling ourselves. Maybe no one can actually get better and all these guys on this stage have already been good. Or have all this talent that they just hadn't brought out. Maybe that's what it is and I have no shot. I remember that. I remember losing faith multiple times. Remember this is back before there even was a 21 convention. This was back before there was the game. There weren't a whole lot of role models out there and there certainly weren't any Asian role models. And we all thought in the back of our head the thing that everyone thought but no one wanted to say was what if? What if this is all a sham? What if the community was all a bunch of scam artists? Just trying to take my money? You can't actually get good. I remember what that felt like. I remember going through those things. I remember those thoughts running through my head. I remember dreaming about pickup. Has anyone ever dreamt about pickup? Few of you guys, I dreamt about pickup. But the bad thing is I didn't dream about epic pickups. I didn't dream about grabbing girls. I dreamt about going into any social environment and just being able to get a kiss. Not every day, once, once. Cause it had been years since that ever happened. I wondered if it happened if I didn't remember how to do it. That's how bad that got. Every step along the way I remembered. I remembered thinking I don't know if I will ever be able to choose who I want to date. If I will simply have to get out there enough times, and maybe this is how the gurus did it, they just get out there enough times until a girl that likes you, you just escalate on her. Maybe that's how the, and there's been plenty of books on exactly how to do that. Maybe that's game, which is great if you're six foot tall and a good looking white guy. Not so great, five foot four in Asian. I remember all of those things, but I kept at it. Every time I lost faith, I looked back six months ago, and I said, where was I six months ago? If I've improved in the last six months, then I'm going somewhere. And that might be slow, but it's steady. And I kept at it, and I had that faith. And you know what, I'm not a religious guy and I don't have faith in a lot of things but I put my faith in this, and I kept at it. And someone once said something that really resonated with me. They said, anything worth being good at is worth being bad at until you get good. Write that down. Anything worth being good at is worth being bad at until you get good. I eventually found mentors, and I found coaches, many of whom have spoken at this event, many of whom have guided me along the way, some of whom are in this room. And I found those guys and they changed everything for me. Now yes, it took a lot of work on my part. It wasn't an instant gimme, but they changed things. They showed me what was possible. They expanded that reality. And the first thing I did is I kicked myself. I kicked myself because in every area of my life I have invested in myself. And all of a sudden it came to pick up. I said, oh, society says we should just be ourselves. Therefore, I'm not going to invest in myself. I'm just gonna be myself and I hope that that works with maybe some tactics sprinkled on top. And I kicked myself for not doing it early. One of my earliest coaches, a guy who has spoken at this event, at this convention, I remember training with him and I remember him telling me, what took you so long? To get help. You're not getting the results you want. You're getting some results and that's awesome. But what took so long? It took 18 months. 18 months of grinding through the trenches. And I said, I wanted to get over my approach anxiety first. I wanted to do, I wanted to get over certain things first before I wanted to training. He said, that's admirable because you did do that to some extent and you got some results to some extent. He said, the problem is you now have 18 months of bad habits. You now have 18 months of unlearning before you can actually learn more. Today, my students get better way faster than I did. Every successive generation of students gets better faster than the previous ones. That's because of these advancements and because guys like you are here. Guys like you are investing in yourself and I applaud you guys for that. A lot of guys think that once you become a coach, it's all over. Now honestly, if I could go to pick up seminars today, I would, but nobody will let me. Okay, all the legal, nobody will let me. But what I do go to are public speaking seminars, marketing boot camps, sales boot camps, boot camps on how to connect with people, boot camps on how to coach, boot camps on how to connect with your students so that you can make a difference. So when I tell you guys to invest in yourself, I'm not saying do what I say and not what I do. I'm walking the walk and I'm telling you guys, this is how I got here and this is how you guys can get here. John Wooden, the legendary UCLA basketball coach said, it's what you learn after you think you know it all and that counts. Write that down. It's what you learn after you think you know it all, that counts. I read that quote every day because it is printed out and it is taped to my mirror in the bathroom. So that despite being a coach, despite being a speaker, I continue to learn. Today, I still consider myself a student. I am still on that journey. I'm just a little bit further ahead. I still break through those waypoints. I still push through those sticking points. Gentlemen, goals are not finish lines. Goals are waypoints, remember that. You achieve a goal and then you move on to the next goal. And if there's one thing that separates me, pretty much any coach out there, it's that I remember all of these things. I remember every piece of this journey, what it took to get here and more importantly, what it will take for you all to get here. And that's precisely why I'm standing in front of you today. Because I'm here to talk about your journey. In an area where almost everybody fails, everyone who even tries this statistically will fail.