 Good afternoon, everyone. I'm The Pretty White. I'm Jon Snowman. I'm Alex Godfrey. And so the idea of this topic came up, because some of the group of us, I'm in the movie. My god, it's like almost 11 months. And it probably wasn't until like a few weeks ago that I'm in the Adelaide, and was able to have someone else to bounce ideas off. It was like being a new mom, had a bound to schedule. And because it's comms, it's directed towards tech. You're using it in any people in the game. That's me. So it's definitely helps, I feel like, to share our experiences, so that you're still kind of being a parent, that sometimes you don't, like, oh, hey, we're going to go here and bounce, and you're bringing the both of them together. So for myself, I'm a digital marketing strategist. I also work at a general assembly. And I'm also open to some of the, these guys are like hard for a head. He's an engineering, even, like, you know, a parenting standpoint, and how that's worked for you. Perfect. And as I'm explaining, I am a assistant director, private and economic solutions, a global architecture and web development. My family, I think right now is four children, eight to 20 boys or four, and maybe they're only to just turn two to zero. So it's a lot to joke, but for the most part, yeah, they're right. But it's cool, you know, being able to handle that, I actually finished, just from an activity standpoint, I finished both of my master's degrees at the general award, so I was a little bit at an angle and doing the things at the same time. So it's possible to do the job that I managed. I was in the software engineer or curricular, technically, so I was also the manager of the curricular. And I'm working on my master's degree in computer science, so I'm doing the general research on my computer science degree, which I think is fantastic to know about work and life and the extent that you are working on at the same time as I was there. And then I also put in the software engineer. So I'll start off with you, John. I just want to ask you, why did you define being the biggest challenge that I'm saying, you know, or is this a lie? So you're in my direction of caring. Well, the first thing is that you have to manage your expectations. For me, the biggest thing was managing not sort of a failure threshold. So, you know, I guess it's the thing where you don't put the technology in a lot of people that you're probably staring at. And some of the time, I thought you wanted to grab the SK, you want to put it in, you can see what you're doing with it. And that was me, I was just teaching and I put all the back on all the time. So just a little all on the money and technology is going to be proven and out of the vets of the public releases. But as soon as those kids stood in, my formula changed. It went from being heavily weighted towards DMI back in college, being the sole source of my happiness and success to being more of a weighted average across, you know, four kids and eight, fourteen kids, eight, fourteen kids, so. And then I know what we're teaching in three days or three days or so. But the bottom line is that you have to, to manage your expectations, you have to come a lot more particular about what you're into. You know, not every technology, not every endeavor is going to have a return. And so as a parent, I've been in a lot of particular about what the opposite is going to be. So in no kind of opportunity to version and I say, I don't want to get back into this. I want to get into an active formula that has to tell me and I don't want to get into it as well. Also I'm going to be very tolerant of the fact that they're curious about stuff. Maybe they have no idea what they're doing but if I show them a cool picture or show them something that's happening with it, I'm going to look like a great rock star in their eyes. I'm not sure what the opposite is. I don't want to get into the other split or anything but you have to be in conflict and understand you go out and be very human with them. You know, it's on the catapult and you're kind of right with them. And I know what the book of stuff is and I work on it, but as long as they're using something that's cool, then I can say they're great. And then Aletha just asked this to you with the rest of you. Can you make an existential or a lack of support in what, how have you been able to manage that? Regarding it, to go back to school is sort of a long-term goal. We might, then we're kind of like, you know, we had a key guidance in the teaching program at second and I got the protection owner software and you know when it happens and stuff and we took a good five, two years to finish that PhD we put all people back to school for, you know, another year, another year, another year. So finally, congratulating people who aren't doing a lot of kind of doing anything. So, when Aletha was born she was, I don't know, I didn't know what it was like. It was the value of the food and the meat. It was the value of any other way. So I was actually before I went back to get a master's degree I had other kinds of lives trying to figure out what was the biggest deal. If technology wasn't the health support of my wife fortunately I have a good job and the one I do is that I really do enjoy technology and I really do love programming. So the new program I go to tech was to just literally bring it and actually bring something that I love but also announced that that I don't know what it was like. And I think for myself kind of being able to have my own schedule and putting like, okay, that's kind of what I got but then also planning is like I'm actually going to be planning is everything. And I think I realize that I work so much, she you know, she's still a little bit naughty but that like once she did that and teaching kind of that was great, so I got her a little computer to kind of distract her and then I could be able to then go and spend some time coding and one of the resources that I find great are the online program so I'm not necessarily able to go out to different classes but then I can still show my skills and what I found also that would be there is the opportunities like not missing those opportunities for Hackfond. So last month Sears did a retail Hackfond at ATV and I kind of challenged myself like, can I do this and have my little girl with me and I wrote a lot of photos of like how she came over the night and I think I had all these looks of like she's here with her daughter so someone was like, wow, she's a rock star and others are like, hello there, she was making noise and I think it was like the VP product development and my guy was like, ah, ah oh no but not to be ashamed of that because you had later on I think it was the next day, people came up and said thank you so much because we don't see women with their shades there, there were a lot of eyes and a lot of eyes at all there were guys there with their kids, like of all the women I think there were other like 17 women that came no, sorry, it was 12 of them at 4 5 actually stayed and then they went with the child you know, seeing those visually that helps it become more a part of the culture like family, it's okay it's okay to have them here and I had two of us share with me at Hackfond so it was kind of a huge job I went up over to Hackfond and you know, my first Hackfond, no it's not the first one the first one, I worked in a very small project a long time ago the first Hackfond that I really had to see then I kind of had so much jail because I was doing so great with the work that they were doing and I was staying, staying, staying also it was like 2 am you know and I missed my time, I missed that and I missed everything I was way too tired that I couldn't like I just truly put the Hackfond in front of what opportunity it is that doesn't mean that I'm off so the next Hackfond I worked with the team and just at 7 o'clock said I'm happy to go home I don't even know earlier in the day like at 7 o'clock I believe that's when I got out and I was just really looking forward to getting it to work but it really helped our team focus and just we could focus on our M.D.P. to give it a little amount of product like, most of the work we were doing before I left and we had a policy and all those other little nice things that we could do together and that worked out really, really well it was very important to me and also remembering you know that I really helped focus on this team and that it's up to Hackfond to have it done those are the ones that I'm on where I put my family as part of Hackfond and then I came here to it now the next question I have for you guys is just how are you able to how do you vibe in scale development for me it's really it's a mixture of things so sometimes I so we need to go with time to get started we need to learn or we need to go overrated so for me I'm a little bit more with Swift and what not you know there's a time where you may want to actually come to the goal you may want to be able to adapt or you may want to fight between controls and reviews but the bottom line is that you can set other conditions up front so that you won't violate them when it comes to the contracts so as a man in the house I have a lot of patience but when it comes to the development I have to make sure that you guys basically it's the evil that's going on and I don't want to print it out I don't want to write and see what it is and do something that has no meaning or purpose but bottom line is that it's all set in the middle of the night or any night or whoever waved or gave it away because I was doing it to people so the bottom line is you just have to sort of subdivide that time up and set those expectations as a percentage I mean probably about 50% of the time that I'm home it would be spent doing both it's contracted quite a bit it's actually good because I like to look because I know I'm a clothing too my computer doesn't love me my code doesn't love me the people I work at code 4 pay me but three months later they look like I haven't even been doing anything so you have to keep the value system intact understand what the value is going to be on the outside and then just keep it in perspective it's all done it's just technology, there's no reciprocation that's going to happen I agree and we're going to kind of shift now to the industry and what we see and are here as it lives to to have the kids and one of the things that some of the people that I spoke to is the importance of talking to like your manager what kind of negotiations do you possibly have as it relates to making sure that you still build what you needed to be more alive so then also being able to kind of be around and how, what would you actually like so like I'm ahead of the experience of working at a corporate, you know, you're licensed to support the workplace and then an hour a day your work, your yeah, your work is just so the first thing is it was very much a you know, you need to be here from 9-5, I know you're going you need to be here from 9-5 I don't care you know you need to be able to work extra you know, 7 hours a week when I was getting started I was kind of like um it would have been more than nice when I was able to talk to my manager and get things out of there what works is I honestly didn't do it then but you know getting it out of my mind is not always feasible you know it's a very flexible arrangement and so the better manager training on how you can work with someone who doesn't have to be unpredictable so I can't really predict like I need flexibility in there I need flexibility if everybody is able to sleep I need the possibility just being able to have a conversation um fortunately I work out a little bit to realize I could have said I'm going to work for an hour come in this is what I do I could have said I'm going to work for an hour and then everybody gets up work throughout the day sometimes I believe they're really good looking up to day to day I'm going to talk to my manager just being able to talk to my manager about this is how this is what will work for me just jumping into being able to talk to the one you said for myself during my pregnancy I hate a lot of people looking up stuff on the Facebook page because of that stigma of that I wouldn't be able to do work or that they had to ease up on me so much or you know missing opportunities so in hindsight I would probably be a lot more affront and not try to do everything because ultimately I think you can believe pregnancy was everything went well but that was a lot of unnecessary stress that I didn't have so definitely I would just share that with everyone in the future down the line don't worry about those those statements like I don't have to worry about those opportunities and also so talking to the students first I was in a planning meeting in an area where we were talking about something cool and of course the manager was going around to setting signs and talking about tasks and everything so we just didn't need to go alone we just had as little plans and so we were able to let y'all look so you know I would appreciate it first off I'm in command so I don't need a manager who doesn't know my situation to decide in front of a room full of people about my availability for work that I signed up for so you don't want to have a competition but you pull it aside and you set any purpose to put it in check and you say look I tell you when I'm with you don't allow people to use your children and their family as a weapon to eliminate where you are in your career because they will try, especially if they got in the gym but the bottom line is that you've got to say look I tell you when I'm off you're not the other way around second you have to be very upfront with you know one of the things I really hate about the city is that as a father it's very rare for a father to show up in the middle of an ice cream party that their kids have in their daycare so when I show up everybody starts looking around like what is this I'm feeling comfortable because I'm in the olden diet and the room is full of moms but I want to be able to do that I want to be able to just probably leave for no reason and just go and participate because the stigma is that fathers don't need work to go see what their kids is doing I want to be there because I want to know my teacher's names I want to know their full names I want to know what kind of history I want to know what's going on but yes I want to know the flavor because I love them but the bottom line is that there are stigmas I don't think you ever reach out around where there won't be a stigma of any kind of gender it could be racial it could be parental but the bottom line is that when you see and when you recognize it it's your responsibility to yourself to get used to the front you may not succeed but when you stand there and you let it happen it basically all of the purposes give them ammunition to keep going over and over again next thing you know you'll be the person who, well if I guess it's working 80 hours you're working 40 they may be considered 40 and that's not the best way to proceed and there are a few opportunities that you would otherwise you may want to but they are taking away from you so in like 15 seconds each so resources or some tips for people just thinking about it and that's the road that they're going down and we'll help them to continue to develop their career as well I can start so there's what's called the launch shift and while that's not only and it's by Riva R-E-V-A Smith it's not just technology but that helps me because when we talk about remote working like so much like the way you plan things up and that kind of just helps me prepare these are the options that I have and to know so that I can go and negotiate so I can negotiate and know that you have a voice so it's really really important I'm going to ask you two so the first one is a website called Common Sense Media World it's a website that has lots of information on movies, TV, video games things that your children or future children will be into and since they're going to be able to check everything they can do is they're for you to tell you what they need to know about privacy, child advocacy everything you possibly want and even if you don't have children, I would advise you to go check it out the second source is Inferioria Priya and Laka I don't know if you paid those I'm sorry there are a couple of times where you'll get frustrated and shake your fist and and you know I'm totally serious the bottom line is find an outlet you could be coding or you could be dating I wouldn't say you're living legal with a dream it helps to bruise yourself I think the thing that I'll leave the most just telling you know advance my career is taking care of myself and talking to other people talking to other women talking to other moms really taking care of myself and finding you know just peanut in that my heart you know this is a call of mental health program in defence without myself and my kids and do you have any kind of advancing of my career Any any questions? Can we want it for the trans vraiction? Are you really curious to give your advice and if your situation I just want to ask about the facility in general, and I'd like to know if the facility is, you know, it could be for any reason, but that's what I wrote. I think it could be on in the morning. One of the situation is, there are many reasons that I want to possibly work it. So just starting that because of value around me, but also asking about it, and asking, you know, people operate. And I know for myself when I did submit an email that I asked about the order, like, the balances, like, just the time I gave you that broad question, because if you can't see too much, you feel a little bit like a family. I think that's one of the real points. So just asking that, and I think that I kind of see to the things that I'm feeding at home is more meaningful. Okay. And we're done. Thank you, everyone.