 hi she was seven i'm back okay so lately i've been getting a lot of women especially women contact me about getting an old boyfriend back getting someone to be with them while they're with someone else um you know and this this whole thing about wanting to be with someone who's already with someone else it's kind of like you saying that you're not good enough to go out and get someone new okay you have to go back and find someone that you've already been with it didn't work out and you still want this person even though they have basically told you they don't want you anymore this is sort of like a slap in your own face like okay this guy left you for another woman he doesn't want you okay why can't you understand that and go find someone who does want you this is where a lot of women make mistakes they chase behind a man who does not want them now imagine if that power was shifted and a man a man that you didn't want was after you was chasing after you okay what could you do to that man what could you do to him you could exploit him for anything okay so basically you're putting yourself in a vulnerable position by just wanting a man who doesn't want you because they could give you false hope to get anything out of you they could say well i might get back with you let's see how it goes let's just spend a weekend together and he just might want some free sex for old times sake and then he's back to the other woman okay or he might you know he might need something from you like some money or you know just you're okay you know to be happy with him and be nice to him for a couple of weeks so that he can focus on other things instead of you blowing up his phone you know a lot of men will exploit women who they don't want you know they'll get them to run their errands for them they'll just get them to be doing stupid silly stuff okay so ladies when a man breaks up with you and they move on to another woman they don't want you anymore okay men are different from women okay the only time a man will want you back if they're with another person as if you get with another person and that other person is better than them okay that's the only time they'll ever want you back because they now feel like you've upgraded and now they're that boyfriend that you will always talk bad about so that ruins their ego okay if you upgrade on a guy and start dating another guy they'll be like back to you like this or trying to get back with you like this this is how it always goes okay if you want your man back start dating other people okay if you if you have a man who just left you now don't wait months and years okay because it's too late there but if this guy just left you start dating other guys and and let it be known put it on facebook do whatever you need to do to get that information out there that you are dating a new person okay even if it's just a first date or a second date or you're just playing the field and seeing what's out there let it be known because and make sure the guys are better than the last guy okay make sure they look good make sure they have money make sure they're like at least you know a couple times better than the guy you who left you okay so this makes him feel foolish for leaving you because now you're getting ready to have a better life okay with another person and he feels like a failure because he couldn't do that for you and now he's seeing your worth because another man with more than him wants you so now he wants you even more okay so ladies don't chase behind a man go get you a better man and watch the other man start groveling back and you might not even want the old man anymore i mean you might not the old man but the the x anymore you might not even want him anymore once you start getting out into the dating world and seeing what else is out there that's better okay um don't sit there and pine away oh my true love my true love men fall in lust women fall in love okay men fall in love later on in life when they have the urge to start a family when they want to become stable you know husbands and fathers that's when they fall in love they don't fall in love when they're young they're falling in lust they they like variety they want to be with someone of course you might have puppy love like when you're young and have like a little romance or whatever but they're gonna get bored and they're gonna want to go explore and see what else is out there because they're young okay and i keep telling women this if you want to if you're like young you want to stay with somebody from the time you're in high school up until forever to the rest of your life or through college through the rest of your life that guy is going to want to see what else is out there i'm sorry okay no human being it's not going to be curious as to what else is out there so when you're looking for a husband or you know a long-term partner you need to look when you're a little bit older maybe closer to 30 that's when people want to start settling down or for men it's even 40 because let's face it they don't want to settle down until they feel like they have no other options okay um so just keep doing what you do start dating other guys um and don't look back you might find someone better if i had to pine over my ex because look if i pine over my ex as to why we weren't together no more and i didn't go out and date other people i wouldn't be married now i wouldn't have what i have right now okay if i was that naive to sit there and talk about true love and oh why this and why me and blah blah blah i wouldn't be worried right now okay let's just face it if the guy left you he don't want you move on that's just it okay don't try to bring people back into your life who don't want to be there okay first of all because eventually they're gonna leave anyway because they left you in the first place for a reason okay um find one that is better suited for you find someone who is on your same levels find someone who's ready to settle down there's no point in chasing after something that does not want you that's like getting fired from a job and put it in your resume and application to the same company okay they fired you they don't want you okay get it through your head and sit no we don't want you the only way that company will ever want you back is if you go out and make a million dollars or um work for a company that's way way better and pays you way way more and then you go back to reapply for that company for a less or lesser salary of course they're gonna hire you back because they see what you're worth now but you're not gonna want to work for them anymore because you see your true value your true potential and you're not gonna want to go backwards in life okay if you keep going backwards in life you're not gonna ever get anywhere that goes for excess too um if you left you left her for a reason or he left you for a reason okay look at it as something positive say okay well good he's out of my life now I have time to go and and see what else is out there I have the time to go see what other kind of men are out there and you know who will like me and you know um I can experience something new and maybe my husband is out there maybe I had to we had to break up so that my husband could walk into my life you don't ever know why things happen you should not walk backwards you can't go backwards and things happen for a reason change is inevitable okay if nothing changes and everything is stagnant that's the same definition as death okay you have to keep changing and moving and evolving even in relationships that late or if that relationship is dead it's dead move on okay find one and and uh create a new one create a new life for yourself okay just because you've been stuck with someone for so many years it doesn't mean that's it because we have people that come in our lives all the time friends we might have a friend for five years and poof they're gone they disappear they don't talk to you anymore you'll grow apart that's just how it is you know you can't try to clasp and grasp on to someone who wants to move on okay that's very needy okay you have to learn how to be more independent um and confident in yourself that you can find somebody better okay not just somebody equal but somebody better this is your opportunity to find someone better okay all the things that he couldn't live up to or do you can find somebody to do those things now okay okay you will never you will never understand why certain things happen but you'll be glad in the future that they did believe me if if if you asked me 20 years ago or 15 years ago would i be happy about a breakup because uh it's going to bring me something better in my life i wouldn't believe you i would like no this was it this is my one true love this this is a and fast for 15 20 years and now i'm glad it happened okay because if i i keep saying this in my videos if i had been with the person that i was sad to um to break up with i would probably be homeless by now let's just put it that way or i would probably look a lot older and worn out and and and just a mess a hot mess that's how it would be if i had stayed with someone that really didn't want me or i really didn't fit well in that relationship okay so y'all stop pining over these idiots who don't want you they want they want to do what they want to do so you need to go do something else okay you need to go explore you need to go have fun you need to go see what else is out there you need to experience something new okay because you don't know what you're missing until you have it you don't know what you're missing until you go experience it and you could be like oh my god i'm so glad he left me this is you know this is the life this is the kind of man i should should be with this is the kind of guy i want this is the kind of guy i wish that guy was who left me you know you might find a whole new life experience just by going out and finding something new okay a lot of women are afraid to do this because they have a little confidence go get you a makeover get change yourself stop looking at the same thing in the mirror every day change men are visual creatures okay do something about it okay we all have a choice people have choices you can either sit there and pine away for somebody who don't want you to throw you away look the same every day think this is it have your low confidence or you can get up say look i i i still got it go get you a makeover get do some makeup do your hair get your nails done get a new outfit go out see what else is out there okay i don't get stuck that's the problem with so many women they get stuck they let a man determine their value and their worth when you are the only one that does that you are the only one that can determine your value of worth but how you treat yourself and what you decide to do okay all is choice there are no victims there's just choices that you're going to make if you want to sit there and be sad that your man left you and and try to figure out ways to get them back that's fine but to me that's like a slap in the face it's like oh he doesn't want me but i'm going to make him want me maybe that's why he don't want you maybe that's why because you are like smothering and he wants to get away from that and maybe he just wants to find something else and maybe he just doesn't want you anymore maybe you've had your time maybe it wasn't supposed to be forever okay so you have to think of it in terms like that it's not you can't change a man's mind to want you men are visual creatures men are led by their penis and men once they leave you basically unless you upgrade on them they're not going to want you back just by being you so you need to get that in your mind you need to move on you need to find someone better okay this could be a good thing for you it could be a wonderful thing to upgrade on your level of men okay so i'm going to leave it at that if y'all have any questions in the comments if y'all want to do a personal one-on-one advice session with me i do give out like personal um advice like via facebook um for um you know a very low price because i do readings all day long so i'm always on facebook but if you just instead of a reading if you just want advice i can do that too uh or if you want to do it over the phone it is a little bit extra and if you want the information i will put my email um address below you can contact me and i'll you know give y'all the information because i've had a lot of women contacting me about things like this for you know advice sessions and stuff and i want to tell them this but you know i just wanted to make the video about it so that they can understand sometimes the the answer is not getting the man back but it's you finding a new man okay so i will see you guys later thumbs up hit that subscribe button if you're not subscribed share this video to someone who needs to see it because i know y'all know somebody that needs to see this video because we all do and make sure you comment what you think about situations like this if you've ever been in this situation if uh some guy left you and you all you can think about is him put it in the comments you know get it out once you write it on paper and you read it or once you write it online and you read it you can actually see how how how desperate and sad you sound and you can get over it faster believe me okay i'll see y'all later