 The fear of love, because that doesn't make any sense to the human being. In fact, people that are on the spiritual journey, it makes even less sense. It's like, why would I be afraid of love? That's the most illogical to someone who's advancing on the spiritual journey. That just seems completely illogical to be afraid of love. I think the more you just consider it, it's just absolutely baffling. Just absolutely baffling. She obviously was afraid of that light. She didn't know what happened. She was just holding on with her fingers and fingernails to not be sucked into it. And yet, I remember many years ago when I asked Jesus, what am I so afraid of? Jesus' answer was love. And I remember, I said, right back, very quickly, I don't understand that. I don't understand that. It doesn't make any sense to me. And so then, I said, can you help me with that? Can you help me understand or help me in some way with this? I don't have the clue what you're talking about. And then I said, okay, how about, okay, just assume that I am afraid of love. Because I'll assume you're right. So we'll take this tact. Assuming you're right that I'm afraid of love, then if I'm afraid of love, what is it that I'm defending and what is it that I'm protecting? And Jesus said a self-concept that was made to take the place of the love. And so that's what the defense mechanisms are about. In this case, holding on, literally holding on to the edge of the door or the wall to keep from being sucked into the light. In psychological terms, you could think about denial and repression and projection and on and on sublimation and all of the defense mechanisms that they have in psychology and psychiatry. But basically, the most important thing to start to realize is that what is being defended is a false identity, is a self-concept that was made to take the place of truth, made to take the place of love. And that, I said, well, thank you. That, I can, I have an inkling of what that's about. I don't fully know what you mean, but I can relate to that. Because this identity that I've clung to, it definitely doesn't seem to be totally loving or created by God. And so that gave me inroads to kind of say, okay, now I'm going to be shown by the Spirit how to expose and reveal what it is that I believe I am and what it is that I'm identified with. And I read in the Course the line, whenever you feel the need to become defensive about anything, you have identified yourself with an illusion. So that was helpful. That was like, oh, now I have an inroads. Identified yourself with an illusion. And from what we're talking about tonight, then the goal is to simply uncover and expose everything that the mind is identified with in this world with the goal of seeing it as all the same. Not seeing it as different, just seeing it as all the same. Yeah, that's everything. That would be a good use of this seeming six weeks. It's just, if you just spent every day, just a small portion of every day just pondering, what is it that I am identified with in this world? That would be a very, very helpful use of time. Defensiveness. Would that be the only clue? Yeah, that would be the clue. Which is great because with a group of us here, you can just then watch whenever any defensiveness arises around anything. It could be seemingly a compliment. It could be a criticism. Maybe there's a compliment. Somebody says, I like your hair. And you feel just a little awkwardness around, I like your hair. Or it could be anything. Or it could be criticism. I don't like your hair. Or something where you feel that little niggling of defensiveness. Then you have an inroad. Then you really have a great opportunity for true forgiveness because you're getting in touch with something that you still identify with as real that's not. Yes, we'll probably still be singing Beatles songs. All you need is love, love, love, love. We do that a lot anyway. But I'm just saying if you just even use part of the day, just part of the day to ponder, and the best parts are the times when you notice a little defensiveness. Now that's practical. You can go, actually it's kind of fun to go through the whole day, la, la, la, la, la, live for today. La, la, la, la, la, live for today. And don't worry about tomorrow anyway. That's actually how you can live your life. You can live your life in the la, la, la. But if you notice some defensiveness coming up then, sneaky ego. That insidious ego. Gotcha. Then you got like a thread. You can follow it in. I'm noticing some defensiveness here. Like Sherlock Holmes. Here we go. Got a little thread there. So that's good. That's what I did. It's all nice to love, love, love stuff, and all this God, all this love. I mean really, it's like if you could just accept that, then you wouldn't need a spiritual path. Certainly wouldn't need a course of miracles. If you could accept that. So then you actually look at it. It's more like the eastern neti neti. Not this, not that. But how do you know what the not is, where the not is? Until you find a little defensiveness arising. And it's like... It's not that much fun also. It can be like Sherlock. As soon as you get on to that little niggling, then it's like, Watson, come here. This doesn't show you can choose to see it like that. Yeah. I think that's the best way to see it is that it's a journey of discovery. And you're discovering everything that is not the truth. Truth is approached through negation. You know, anyone who just thinks that I'm going to affirm myself back to the truth, it's actually approached through negation. You have to see everything that the truth is not. This is just what the ego is. That's another way of saying you must expose the ego. You can't keep part of the ego hidden and part of the ego exposed and expect to be free of the ego. The part that's exposed is like, hmm. And then the part that's not exposed is the ego is laughing down there. Still gotcha. But it's the total exposure, the total netting netting. So, how do you know when the total exposure, isn't there always more hidden? Well, it has to come to an end. That's the smile untrument at the end before he goes out the exit door. There has to come a point, you know, where there's the metaphor of right mind, wrong mind, which is, of course, metaphor finally has to dissolve as well. In fact, I had a woman at the conference came up and she said, I've been involved with non-duality for like 30, 30, 40 years. And she said, I've got a lot of non-duality friends who, every time I talk about a course of miracles and choose again and choose to be right minded and choose the atom and everything, they go, no, no, no, no, no. Choice is an illusion. And she said, hmm, who is this? This came up to me when I was in RML's group that time. I think they recorded it. All these, this course group was going along, working with the course. And then one of the women came and brought a different book in a date of Adanta book. And it was just dispelling, dispelling everything, dispelling choice. And so she said, we've all been fooled by this course. There is no Holy Spirit. There is no right mind, wrong mind. There's only the one. And we've been fooled. We don't need 365 lessons and a mind training program. It's all one. Right here in the book, I read it. The book told me so. And they all went around and they said yes. So the group had basically rebelled against the course. Or they might say we have transcended a course in miracles, everything. And I just kind of sat and listened to them for 25 minutes. I said, how do you feel? They said, what do you mean? I said, how do you feel? I don't know. Things aren't real either. Yeah, but how do you feel? Wow. They said, do you have perfect happiness? Well, no. But that's why we're studying this new book. So we had a whole discussion about how do you know it's when the metaphor of right mind, wrong mind, experientially it dawns on the mind that healing is all-inclusive, all-encompassing. It doesn't have an opposite. There's not an aspect of the mind that's healed and an aspect that's not healed. You can't have partial healing just like you can't be partially pregnant. You know, that's the recognition that this is all about. Is it a feeling? Oh, yes. Is it a state of mind? Oh, yes. Is it a perception? Yes. Do you still see the world? Yes. Is there anything... Are there any opposites? No. Are there any parts? No. Is there an inner and an outer? No. Mind is all-encompassing. Is the world outside of your mind or the mind? No. Is there anything outside of the mind? No. Krishnamurti was a beautiful teacher and one of his teachings was, I am the world and the world is me. He was just teaching that experience. There aren't separate... The cosmos is not separate from the mind. It's all consciousness. That's unified consciousness. It's probably a better way of saying it. So when we come back to Truman Show, that's the example of him, that big grin on his face. It's like he can't hold it in. And that's what it's about.