 Welcome to the session and with no further ado, I would like to tell you to talk to you about leadership. My vision is that anyone is a leader. Any one of us is a leader. And my mission is to reveal the leader that is in everyone of you. One of the questions I want you to ask to answer, it's in the bottom of the poll, what are the qualities of your role model leader? If you care to answer that. And that was the first one. Think of a leader who is a role model for you. And then answer to the poll, what are the qualities of that role model leader? Is it authority? Is it great listening? Is it protection, inspired creator, aligned exemplarity or supportive for people? So the answer is supportive for people. Great. Thank you, Sanjal. Can you move to the next slide, please? Now think of the best manager you had in your professional experience. And you are invited to answer the second question of the poll. So the answers are the same. What are the qualities of the best manager you have ever crossed? Either it was your manager or another manager. So what were the qualities you admired? Authority, great listening, protection, inspiring creator, exemplarity, supportive for people. So you have one, four, three, four, zero. I hope the poll was... And can you share the results? Share the results with you? Yeah. So the results are great listening. There's a problem with the sharing of the presentation. No, that is fine. Okay. It's there in the discuss tab. Nareesh has shared this. Okay. Okay. Great. Brilliant. So thank you, Nareesh. So what we see is that as a role model, 54 of you answered that it's supportive for people. 33% majority of great listening. And there's something about protection. So the qualities supporting, listening, great listening, and a little bit of inspired creator, what we perceive as the qualities of a great leader, and it always works like that, is can you share the next slide, please? Great leaders are at the service. Great leaders are always at service of other people, of their teens, of the customers. And that is why, for me, really the leaders for tomorrow, we need to shift the pyramid. To shift it in the way that you can you put the next slide. So they put the greatest leader at the button. Flip the hierarchy pyramid. And really people, if we don't flip the pyramid, we won't have a customer centering organization. If you just look at a traditional organization, what is happening? Frontlines have managers. Managers have directors and they're the C level and then the CEO. And in a traditional organization, the front line is at the service of the line managers because they depend on them. And the line managers are the service of the directors and the directors are at the service of the C level people and the C level people are at the service of the CEO. Where are the customers? The customers are forgotten at the bottom. Who cares about the customers? In the traditional, my truly belief is that in a traditional organization, customer and user centric is only wishful thinking. And the way we can do it is to flip the pyramid. So the people that are the most important people are the front line people. And line managers, front line people that serve the customers are in direct contact with customers. The line managers are serving that teams. Directors are serving the managers. The board of directors are serving the other levels of director and the CEO is at service of anyone. So I truly believe that this is the answer for customer centric organization. And there's a problem with this because it's very hard to flip the pyramid. And why is that? My experience with leadership and coaching leaders is that actually when we serve our managers, we serve our ego. It's our ego who needs some protection. And that protection comes for the hierarchy. The goal is to go and really grasp the leadership that we have all in ourselves. And for that, what I would like to work with you now is work on the ego to access leadership, to get a bit out of our ego. But that's not that simple. We say, let go of the ego. That's not simple. We have a very long story with our ego. And actually it is back from when we were children. Can you put the other slide? Thank you. The next slide. So let's go back when we are kids. So I know this is a little bit scary, but still it's the path we need to embrace, I think. The inner self is how we get on the world. We are born in the world as children that we are open to unconditional love. We work by being linked to each other. Of course, the first thing is our parents. The first ones are our parents. But also the other ones. So we come into this world open. And what we think, well, the therapist, and this is a model by William Schultz, is that what we are here for is to share love and have love back. Now this is the plan we have. But the reality doesn't stick to this plan. Can you put in the next slide? Thank you. The plan is that everything is all around us that is not exactly very open for love. And there is the emotion of fear that is the first one that comes in. Just to re-relax about fears, fear is good for life because it opens up what is the first signal of a danger. So fear is for survival. It's a very, very healthy emotion. Can you change the slide? Thank you. So why we become fearful? Because we have at the beginning when we are children, we have five fundamental wounds that transform into fears. And the first one is rejection. If you remember as a child, sometimes as a baby, our mother just says when we want to play, it says we don't have time for that. So I would like to do something else right now. This is not a big thing for the adults, but for us as children, this is the first wound that is stamped on us, is the rejection. Parents are rejecting us. Can you change the slide, please? The second fundamental wound we carry in our life is abandon. Imagine that mom, when you are a baby, you are sleeping and she went to the neighbor to grab something and she chatted a little bit with her about five minutes and then he heard a huge cry. Of course she comes back and when she comes back, you are crying. Of course she hugs you and she assures with all the love. But in our system of beliefs that is very ancient, this second wound is pasted on us. It's the wound of abandon. Can you change? The third one is betrayal. You know that your mom and my mom, all moms, tell to their children, I never ever lie to you and the child believes that. Of course mom is there and parents are there to protect them and if they say that they will never lie, that is true. And one day the child realizes that Santa Claus is a lie told by the parents. And in that moment, it's too late. We have in our luggage and our legacy the wound of betrayal. People that we trusted most betrayed us. Can you change the slide please? Thank you. So the fourth one is the humiliation, the wound of humiliation. If you were at school and something happened, someone dropped something on the floor and it was broken. And the teacher tells you, you have broken this and you are so messy. And that's the moment where another wound of humiliation is packed in our legacy. So we have four. The fifth one, thank you, you can change the slide. The fifth one, imagine a sister, the older sister that has a cake or a toy. And the younger brother, actually it's his toy but the older sister wants to play with that toy and wants to take it. And maybe the younger brother even doesn't really like that toy so much. And there's a little bit of dispute and mom says to the older sister, this is his toy. It's not a toy for you. This is the moment where we bring in our legacy of wounds, the wound of injustice. The younger brother doesn't even want to play with that but because he's the younger brother, because it's his toy, mom says that he will play with it whenever he wants it and you can't. So what are they doing all this fundamental wounds so that's rejection, abandon, humiliation and injustice. With all these ones, what we do, we create a system of adaptation. Can you change the slide, please? Yeah. So these are the fives, rejection, abandon, humiliation, betrayal, injustice. Maybe you can just take a moment here with me and feel what is the one that you feel the most for you. What was the most important, the deepest for you? So I don't want you to share it because all is personal but just think which one comes up. Ten seconds. Right. I hope you have it. This comes from a model that is called Human Element from William Schultz. This is for you to know if you want to know more about it. So all these fundamental wounds, what do we do with them? We have them in our legacy baggage and we create beliefs. We create a system of beliefs. Then we adapt to what we think the world expects from us. So we can be loved by parents and then by other people that we cross, including colleagues, managers in our professional lives. Can you change the slide? So we create this adapted system. And this adapted system is our ego. And what are the behaviors that we build in? So we can somehow heal those wounds. The first one is control. The first one of them is control. When we have the wound of rejection, we want to control the world so we will never be rejected again. Power over people. So when we have power, no one ever, ever would humiliate us anymore. Recognition. The others recognize us and because we are linked with the others and we see recognizing the eyes of others, we will never, ever be abandoned. And self-protection or self-justice. I'm just putting in some examples that it's not that linear. It doesn't mean that control is exclusively linked to rejection. So I think it's a helpful way to just see how that works on creating the adapted system that we carry in life and that is called our ego. So you can see, I hope, that letting go the ego, it's not such an easy task. We have the ego from our early life and ego protects us. The way that we deal with fear is with our ego. And we arrive with this adapted system of ego in a new environment. Can you put the other slide? Thank you. The next slide. We arrive in the professional adapted system, which is also an adapted system with its own ego. And we create another layer that I call the pro-ego, the professional ego where we have the same behaviors, control, power, validation of other. We seek for social status. So you see, you can have this. We are here, the true self, the inner self. We create an adapted system, which is the ego. And then in the professional life, we put it another system, which is the professional ego. So we walk in life and in interaction with our teams, our managers and our pairs like that, armored. So very much armored. These are not good conditions for leadership. Can you change to the next slide? Thank you. So to become a true leader at service, as we've seen at the beginning of the presentation, you all said that a true leader, a great leader is the one that supports other people, listen other people and help them grow, is inspirational. So to go back and create a true leader, what I like to invite you and us all actually is to go back to the true me and bravely face our fears. The fears that were created by all are called the fundamental wounds. Can you change the slide? So the fear, we fear we carry in our professional environment. Can you change the slide? It was just to say that we carry our fear that we have from here. We carry it in our professional environment and we behave accordingly. If you can change the slide, thank you. So do you remember, fear is good for life. So the rest of the session, I will invite you to work a little bit on your fears, on our fears. And I wanted to remind it as a gentle reminder that fear is good for life. So there's no problem with fears. Can you change the slide? Fear is not the problem. The way we respond in our environment to fears is a true problem. And can you change the slide? So that's okay. That was that rejection is a way that we carry it also in, it's just an example. Rejection in the pro field, we also can be rejected and feel exactly like the baby that was rejected. There's no difference. There's no difference. The inner self is that baby or child that wanders and is connected with everyone else. So can you change the slide? Also, thank you. So remember, professional adaptive system, control validation power, social status, pro-ego. Let's try to move them a little bit away. Can you change the slide? Because in today's business world, the main source of fear is ego. Exactly. If you go back to one slide, Sonali, the one with the adaptive system, yeah. So everything that in this professional adaptive system, what is really the source of fear is our professional ego. So go further on the other side. Okay. The idea is to how we can, in a very gentle, compassionate way, work with our own ego. As we said, ego is very strong and he knows, or it knows, it knows how to manipulate us a lot. The way to work with our ego is the first thing is to recognize that we have it. This is the first act of vulnerability. The second one is to recognize that it was helpful. It helped us, protected us through our life. So one thing that I can invite you to do is just a brief moment, five seconds, thank to your ego. Okay. But now let's try to something else. Try to go to that fundamental for wound and fear and work around it. This is what I invite you to do right now. And to make, I hope, the thing a little bit easier. So these are the questions, what is the fundamental fear and ego? Sorry, wound or fear, you think it's most important for you. And what is your ego behavior? If you try to reflect on that for 30 seconds, while I'm giving my own example, my fundamental wound and fear, the most important because we all have it. And this is not a question of having unhappy childhood. We all had a very happy childhood and had some little things that happened. So my wound is humiliation. And the fear I developed because of that is the fear of disappointment. I'm bloody freaking out to disappoint people. Even right now, you know, I'm looking and I said, how many thumbs up do I have? So this is a fear of disappointment. If I don't have enough, then maybe I'm not good enough. So I disappoint you. What is the way that I've worked my ego behavior, working with that, dealing with a fear of disappointment, was to create for myself a behavior of a rescuer. Always be at the service of people even if there was no help solicited. I won't enter into that model, but that was my ego behavior. It was not my true self that said, hey, maybe I can give you an advice on this and I can give you an advice on that and maybe you want this. It was a way for me to make myself seen and to make myself seen and to make myself protected by the disappointment. We'll come back. I've just seen in the discussion fear must be replaced by love. Yes, absolutely true. Now, what I think we need is to have that power to deal with our fears because fear is a fundamental emotion I'm telling you once again. It keeps us alive. So it has a very high priority in our brain. If there's a danger, fears come up and it's a lot of work to do on that. Can you change the slide? Thank you. So access self leadership means dropping the armor of our ego by facing the fears and by facing the fears, I think we can reach love to answer the comment that was in the discussion. So can you change? So to face our fears, which is scary just saying it face your fears is oh my God. We're not want to talk about that. I would invite you to change the perspective of fears. Think that when you're afraid of something, this is good news. What if the fear was a lighthouse that tell us what is really important for us? We never fear something that is not a stake. Something that has no meaning for us, no importance won't rise fear. So the first thing is to think for a moment that fear is a lighthouse. It's not something to oppress or overcome or hide. But on the contrary, turn and look at it and ask what does it want to tell us? Can you change the slide please? Thank you. So this is very quickly because there's a tons of material. But this is a way, a model that I created to shift perspective on fears and access the selfless leadership with Theory U by Otto Scharmer. You state the current situation. So I said, what's the current situation? What am I afraid about? Look at them. Redirect the attention and say what is important behind that? Letting go of different beliefs. The ego might melt down. And face the chaos that is the moment of true fears when we've let go of our behaviors. But we feel so vulnerable that we just want to go back and the other say this. Letting come the new ideas saying what is truly important actually for us? Crystallizing a new behavior and prototyping the new behavior when we are more vulnerable. By the way, being vulnerable is also an act of generosity. People usually answer to vulnerability in a much better way than in front of armors. So a little exercise for the next five minutes. Can you change the slide? The little exercise to stay with your fears and transform your fears. Remember a situation that you'd like to change. Probably a professional situation might help. And try to see what is to think of what is stuck there. I will leave you for one minute or maybe less to write that down. Okay, okay. Can you change the slide now that I hope you have it? You might maybe in the discussion you can put it. It's fine for me. I have it just a way to track that there's advancement. And now I would like I invite you to do this exercise. Answer these questions in that situation that you feel stuck. How do you feel? What would you like to change? And if you were to change that, what are your current beliefs? You know, the beliefs are our armored ego. How does that belief relate with your fears? Then just let's have one minute of presence, everyone that is. We are all here and we know that we are all here. Stop thinking. We are just together. Just breathe. Just feel that we breathe all together regardless of what time is with you all around the world. Late morning, evening, early. We breathe all together for one minute. Right. Now I hope you have the answers to the first two questions. And I invite you to answer the fourth question. What is your need behind that fear? What is truly important? No, we have we've made the journey belief fear and behind the fear. What is truly important? And if you find that try to write down how you can otherwise serve that need. Or that thing that matter that is important for you. That matter that matters. And how you can be better realigned with what is important for you. Okay. If you can put in the discussions just some comments saying I'm done or not. Because if not, I hope you this this question is worth more than three minutes to go through. But you can take them and try to reflect more on them on them by your own. What I appreciate or I said that we are here together. And while each one of you reflects on this theory idea there your own answer to these questions. There is a holding space where when we are all together. Thank you. Can you change to the next slide, which is the last slide. I hope you've got some good answers. And with this exercise know that you can empower yourself. When we talk about empowering, no one can empower someone else. You can all only empower yourself. And you have that choice to be a leader to be a leader from yourself. And also what you can do is to support other people as leaders to empower themselves also. Thank you so much. I think we have three minutes or so for questions. And you can join me talk to me on Twitter, my mail. There's a ton of other material on leadership. I'm passionate about working on. I don't know if they're okay. I'm going to the discussion. How do you distinguish between ego and self-esteem? They're a very good question. So the self-esteem is the way that you appreciate yourself. And when the people that are self, when we are have a self-esteem, we are kind to ourselves. We know that we what we bring is value. Ego is an armor that it's always wants to do some avoidance behaviors that will protect us from being confronted to a world that is hostile or threatening. So, for example, my self-esteem is I'm very passionate about this material and what I've brought to you. As I said, so I really, I really bring it as a gift. And so this is the way my self-esteem, the ego in me would ask you the question, did you like it? Can you tell me what did you like about it? It's a way to have a recognition. For example, by the way, in retrospect is our feedbacks. Actually, I today I ask more the question, what was helpful for you? What did you learn? It's not about how give me a feedback of what how well did I do? Did I perform? Or so what did you learn? What what did you wanted to learn more and you didn't have enough, you know, so to but never really a feedback about about how well I perform. This is my example. I hope it helped as a as an answer. So there's another question. How do we help people understand that sometimes our reaction of behavior is driven by self-respect dignity and not because of ego? Oh, this is this is a passionate topic. This reminds me of a protocol that is called nonviolent communication, by the way. When you if you want the people to understand that you act by respect, the idea is that you put boundaries. And it's to be very clear about those boundaries, what is OK for you and what is not OK for you. And if you have a specific situation, you can say that in this situation, this is what happened, you know, the facts and then say that this facts made you feel in a way that was not OK for you. So this is also the difference between boundaries and ego. If you are explicit about what your boundaries are, this is not ego. The ego is really the the biased behavior we have to protect ourselves in while in the same time we are fully adapted to the system that is that we interact with. The self esteem and and the the dignity is we are who we are in the system. We don't really adapt to be to please the system. Ego always please the system. So so to satisfy the way we look for external comments and probably external good and satisfying comments. Yes, this is only an example. It was an easy example for me and because we are in a conference, it was also a way for me to show up in vulnerability. But there are other examples, you know, the people that don't I mean, I don't want to be judgmental, but it's another example. If I don't say something something that I think it's wrong in a meeting. And I then I say to myself, well, I don't want to show up too much because I I'm a humble modest person. This is the ego that tells you to that you are modest and you want to show up. This is a way to be protected to protect yourself. So one, I'm sorry to interrupt you but running short on time. So guys, you can take your questions to the VIP section. Okay, of course. Okay, so thank you so much for this session and sharing your experience with us today. So I would request everyone to read the session by clicking on the poll section, which is there on your right. And one of the people for next one hour in the VIP section. So you all can join over there and continue with the questions over there. Of course, of course, I will be more than happy to ask the questions I didn't ask. I wouldn't have time for us. Thank you for being here for me with me. And let's keep the conversation going. Bye.