 The first thing that we have to say is that too often when you and I look at certain deeds we do not understand all actions or rulings we do not understand why and in which way it should be performed and what happens also is that we are afraid of the reaction of the people. The mind goes into this phase of calculating what others will perceive and this is often the problem when it comes to public speaking for instance people don't like to speak in front of others because they're afraid how they'll be perceived. When it comes to the shaking of the hands you and I may have 101 assumptions about what the others think, what the others may judge what conclusions they'll come about with. I recall that there was an important story that highlights how you and I may be looking at this subject or this issue in the wrong way. Let me illustrate this by recalling this story that there was a man by the name of Sheikh Abul-Khayr living in Iran one day the king's son his name is Hassan decided to take the path of spirituality to study mysticism and this Sheikh Abul-Khayr was a scholar of mysticism of spirituality. He came to him he said to him Maulana sheikhna I wish to study and you I want you to be my teacher I want you to teach me how to get close to Allah and purify my heart can you do that the sheikh looks at him and says I can do that but it will cost you a lot this man who was the son of the king so don't worry Maulana I can give you whatever you want the sheikh said no you've misunderstood what I meant it's not money that I'm looking for he said what is it he said I'm going to ask you to do a number of things can you do them he said yes of course I want to be your student sheikh said to him I want you to go to the marketplace and buy some meat for me this Hassan who had never left the palace always has servants says sheikhna please can I get one of my servants to do it he says no you have to listen if you want me to teach you have to listen to me he said okay what do I have to do again he said go to the end of the marketplace in the city and buy some meat in front of others this Hassan walks out the prince goes to the market his head is down he's thinking people are looking at him and saying what is this guy doing he's the prince why is he walking in the street in such a way there's no one with him why is he in the market it doesn't befit him he is red he's embarrassed his head is down quickly he gets to the market store where meat is being sold he says to him quickly give me some meat quickly the meat is given to him he rushes back towards where the sheikh is staying he presents the meat the sheikh says to him now what I want you to do is go back to the other side of the town go to the river and wash this meat this man said sheikhna now you're really crossing the line what do you mean I have to wash this meat can I get somebody he says no this man now reluctantly Hassan goes across the other side of the city once again wary of people's eyes upon him goes to the river sits down thinking in his head people are saying how is it that I'm washing the meat in front of others he washes the meat with water in the river he stands up brings it back now the sheikh looks at him and says now I want you to do is what I want you to cook this meat for us prepare some stew for us Hassan says now I can't do this this is now you've crossed the line I have never cooked in my life sheikh says to him do you want me to be your teacher or not he says okay I'll go and do it he goes outside he gets a pan and he starts cooking the the meat preparing the stew in whichever way he can when he presents the stew to the scholar and his students the scholar looks at the students says today I want us all to eat the stew of Hassan's pride they said what he said I wanted to teach this particular individual to crush his ego to crush the idea that others are what looking at him and what he's doing is inappropriate that today he has passed the exam meaning what he looked at him and says now go back to the market and ask people did you see me earlier what did you think when you saw me he went back to the marketplace throughout the way he looked at the people he said to them excuse me did you see me earlier when I came head down to buy some meat they said no we didn't pay attention to you you were here really we didn't really see you he said didn't you see me then what about when I went to wash the meat he said no we weren't paying attention at all the sheikh was trying to inculcate the message in the heart of this particular individual and it's a lesson for you and I too often we calculate and we have assumptions about other people's opinions that stop us from displaying our beliefs and our practices we think people think oh it's rude it's inappropriate it should not happen here yet indeed with the right way we can get confidence