 The automatic image of childhood is often populated with sunny images of laughter, playing, and safety. Unfortunately for some, the darkness of depression marrs these memories with a heavy smear. Support, love, and reassurance from parents are crucial at this time for a child. Sadly, whether it be due to denial, lack of understanding, or misattributed blame, parents' responses can actually make it even harder for kids to deal with depression. As such, identifying false beliefs and spreading the truth is necessary to take back that childhood. Let's see if we can help clear the air. Number one. Children can't get depressed. It's adults only. Superficially, it looks like children don't have enough life to build up the worry and jaded outlook that is associated with depression. No bills, no worries. Right? Well, not exactly. Remember depression isn't a one-off bad day. According to data from the 2019 National Survey of Children's Health, 22% of the children tested had some sort of an emotional problem, with the youngest participants being only three years old. Depression is a psychological condition that has no age requirement. Research has shown that depressed children's brains react the same way as adult brains to stress hormones and to the happy chemicals, serotonin, and dopamine. To help with perspective, consider too that a child is still developing their identity. Peasing at school to a child can be as crushing as a publicly cheating spouse to an adult. We tend to forget that just as children don't get adult stuff, adults have to make an effort to see through the child's eyes to understand them as well. So although depression shouldn't be a children's illness, unfortunately it can be. Number two. It's just a phase, it'll pass. Harmless phases from your childhood. An obsession with one color or only talking about one particular cartoon are not the same as depression. Sure, kids get upset, but for depression, this isn't one tantrum after not getting ice cream. The behavior is an inexplicable ongoing sadness or anger with no obvious provocation. It's tempting to hope it will pass, but since depression doesn't go away on its own, ignoring these signs will let it fester, increase in severity, and possibly develop into adult depression. The fallout then includes poor health, increased anxiety, criminal behavior, academic decline, relationship issues, and most frighteningly, increased risk of suicidal ideation and actions. Depression is an illness that requires appropriate treatment. You would never let a child walk off a broken leg bone, so you shouldn't let their broken mental health be walked off either. They're glued to that darn phone all the time. Today, regardless of your age, you've heard or seen something like this. Kid has a sore throat? It's because of that phone. They're hungry? It's because of that phone. A kid's depressed? Is it that phone again? Well, it could be, in a way. But context is needed. Recently, researchers at the University of North Carolina found that the phone use and depression connection in teens and younger children is corollary, not direct, meaning variables associated with phone use may be the culprits. As an example, with kids, risks online tend to mirror risks offline, so schoolyard bullying means a greater risk for cyberbullying, which can lead to depressive symptoms. If the child feels negative overall, they're more likely to seek negative online content. Social media can also provide unrealistic expectations, which leads to feelings of isolation and loneliness. The takeaway is, a phone acts as an easy open portal to information. This is not bad in and of itself. It's how the information is absorbed and used that brings controversy. Using a phone isn't an instant depression curse. Parents can help mitigate the issue by positively reinforcing phone downtime with family bonding activities. Associate the blue light break with goodness. Number four. It's not depression, they're just lazy. As if depression didn't suck enough on its own. The symptoms also tend to masquerade as stereotypical laziness. Since laziness is an easier concept to swallow than my child has mental health issues. Parents are tempted to assume the child is crying wolf, or crying depression. They think the child just scored a free ticket to the lazy extravaganza. Take a ride in a messy room, visit the rats nest hair booth, and whoop it up to the dirty laundry coaster. Reality is, the brain is messing biologically with this child. Let us explain. To do anything, energy and thought are needed. To get and use these power pellets, our brain needs a particular chemical balance. If that balance is messed up, so is the ability to think and do. Now, remember a day that wiped you out, you were so exhausted you barely made it home and threw the door? The shoes even stayed on when you crashed into bed. Take a shower, that's not happening. Lucky for you, this was just a one timer. When a mind is depressed, this run down, living in molasses feeling and the zeroed out energy is a constant. But wait, there's more. Yeah, depression has more physical symptoms than these. When observing a child, if they're constantly unable to do the basics like cleaning their room or playing with friends, this might be a red flag. Look further than laziness. The child is aware of what it looks like, they just can't do it. So their lazy assumption and getting angry may be unfair. Ask why and assure them that you're on their side, let them know you love them no matter what. Number five, therapy means my child getting stuffed with meds. The initial and immediate response of therapists stuffing a child with medication like a turkey is a myth. Child psychiatrists will often initially recommend non-medication therapy through a psychologist. The most popular and effective being cognitive behavioral therapy, CBT. CBT is a talk therapy, not medication, that helps improve both thought and behavior. It works on improving communication, emotion regulation, and coping skills. Also, symptom reappearance has been shown to be lessened by 63% after CBT. Depending on severity, medication may be needed if talk alone isn't enough. Rest assured, the psychiatrist will, as professionally obligated, take precautions and consider several factors, like the level of depression and the preferences of the patient or guardian. The starting dose is set as low as possible and the entire process is closely monitored by professionals. As a parent or legal guardian, you will be kept apprised of treatment and included in the final decisions. The goal is to help the child, so all possibilities should be considered, as well as taking the professional's advice seriously. And number six, if my kids depressed, it means I'm a bad parent. In some cases, parents actually can affect their kid's mental health, but those cases are fairly extreme and not the norm. If there isn't an abusive household, a messy divorce, or other poorly handled, abnormal situations, chances are you are not the cause for this depression. Also depression develops due to multiple reasons, including biological ones. You can't have control over biological brain chemistry, so that can't be your fault either. What is key is understanding your child's struggles, and even if you don't know how, that you're trying to learn how to help them. That effort and caring, not taking the easy way out, is what makes you a good parent. Hopefully this is something you watched out of curiosity and there isn't a depressed child in your life. However, if you watched as a parent who suspects or knows your child is depressed, we sympathize and encourage you to seek professional assistance. It can get better.