 Hello and welcome to all of you new recruits. I'd like to take a moment and say that you have made the right decision that the chaos insurgency is now your home. Most of you are former foundation employees, either agents, doctors, or even D-classes just managed to escape, but the important thing is that you are now free of the tyranny of the SCP Foundation. What does freedom mean to you? Freedom to me is the ability to go about my life in the way I see fit, without having to worry about the control of some overarching shadowy organization. Don't get me wrong, we are something of a shadowy organization ourselves, but we allow you to do what you want. We allow you to make your own mistakes. Everyone in this room is going to be a part of a single organized cell. You will not have contact with other parts of the chaos insurgency. You will do your jobs independently, with no connection to leadership. Each of you will be tasked with doing what you think is best for yourself and for the organization. We're just a coalition of like-minded individuals. With that said, there needs to be some limitations just from a practical sense. Yesterday, about 20 miles south of Albuquerque, an SCP Foundation site underwent a containment breach, and these three Mensa candidates to my right are the only people left from the cell of the insurgency that attempted to take advantage of this. Now don't get me wrong, we do reward personal initiative here, and there is something to be said for taking advantage of the SCP Foundation at its weakest, but you gotta be smart about it. That's why you were recruited, not just for your ruthlessness or your attitudes towards freedom, but rather your ability to make the right decisions at the right time. These three individuals, private stupid, private dumb and corporal idiot, are not just all that's left, but also brain dead morons at the moment. They were exposed to some cognitohazard or another, whilst they were infiltrating the site. Now this is fine, and they were evacuated before the disaster that befell the rest of their team, and normally would just send them off to, well, take a full dose anti-mimetic agents and hope for the best, maybe even apply some amnestics as much as we hate those here. The only thing they did wrong was going in half-cocked. They did not understand the situation they were getting themselves into, and as a result, they and their entire squad was destroyed. Now what does that mean? The SCP Foundation as a whole might be an organization of lackadaisical morons with a stick up their ass bigger than a flagpole, but the thing is, some of the things they keep in containment are incredibly dangerous. We can go out there and steal whatever we want to from them, but it had better be something we could use, and not something that's going to take up resources for us to keep. This little base outside of Albuquerque really only had two or three anomalies in the first place. One of them turned our friends here into idiots, and the other, well, went up with the failsafe nuke that went off. Thankfully, it was just a tactical warhead, and I don't think it made the news, but their entire team's gone, just because they didn't plan properly. So I want you to understand something. Now we may push you towards freedom, and we may push you towards independent action, but if you think your job is to just fuck up the foundation because you got some sort of a vendetta to serve, then you need to unfuck yourself right now. We are not defined by our opposition to the SCP Foundation. If they were to go away tomorrow, we would still exist, and in the end, we may exist after them. Yes, we would like to see them disappear, but at the same time, they are an endless resource for us to recruit from, for us to steal from, and for us to become more powerful off the backs of. The SCP Foundation is not our enemy. They are our victims. At least three slack-jawed idiots right here are the lucky ones. Their friends went up in a blaze of nuclear glory and will not be remembered. Now these men here will be taken care of. Their families will be taken care of. They will be provided with as much help as we can provide, but in the end, their failures are their own, just as their successes are their own. Take heed of this lesson. It's seldomly right there in front of you the way this is now. Usually I just have to rant and rave. I don't usually have freshly lobotomized idiots to stand by as object lessons. But remember this and understand it. These three men could be you tomorrow if you do not respect your prey. And that is what the Foundation is. Make no doubt, but they are dangerous. When you hunt down and kill a man, you do not let your guard down for a moment because a man is a vicious, terrifying animal. And yes, I can see from your faces. I will admit I have some personal experience in that venue, but we're not here to talk about that today. Maybe one day you'll be well off and successful enough to have such experiences. I can tell you that it was not a fun time for me. It was not something I would like to do again, but it is something that needed to be done. The O5 Council, the Ethics Committee, the SCP Foundation as a whole organization are corrupt from the top to the bottom. But it is not our responsibility to rip them out, root, and stem. The thing is, corruption on the level of the SCP Foundation is merely an opportunity for people like you and me. An opportunity does not knock every day. You don't turn away opportunities, but you do need to evaluate them properly. Use your knowledge wisely, or you will end up like our friends here. That's it for right now. I want y'all to check your packets, make sure you have all the documentation you need, and if you want, you can shake hands with these fucking morons right here, but I wouldn't bother with it. But don't worry, they're not gonna remember you. That's it. Get out. Well, that was interesting. I'm trying this new thing. I did this last week, I think it was, where I just pick a character and kind of a voice and just go and tell a story in an improvised sort of setting. I don't know how well that worked out, but thank you very much for listening. If you enjoyed it, scroll down and hit the subscribe button, and then head on over to patreon.com forward slash de-sumerian and pledge at any level. It's nice to know that I'm not alone out here and I will see you all again on Tuesday.