 In 2007, Frontline broadcast a film called Brewing Up Online. You need to have dinner and talk to your friends because everybody uses it. Good morning. Please welcome Chairperson of the Community-Wide Parent and Collaborative Committee of Davis, Karen Langslam. The topic for today's event came about when all of the reps from the various schools back together talked about what was most concerning and what was most on our radar screens today as parents. And Parenting and Infirmation Age came up for everyone, whether you had elementary school, preschool, high schoolers, anyone in between, because it hits all of us almost every day. I know just this morning I got emails from some hobo hotel online, some of one of my kids is playing online, put my email address in, and everything that they... There's something like that going on for all of us. So we've got someone for you today, some local experts on this topic. We'll speak with us about what's going on out there today, and I know that when I met with a few of these folks, I was shocked at some of the things that are happening out there and some things that we didn't do as parents to be more prepared to address them. Our moderator for today's panel discussion is Ms. Pamel Lyb. Pamela is a broadcast journalist who worked for several years at Channel 3 KCRA in South Minow and is currently the UC Davis Law School Director of Marketing and Communications. Pamela continues to work in broadcast journalism. You may have heard her recently on Capitol Public Radio, and the NQR affiliate in Sacramento as she does a documentary show in there. In addition, Pamela sits on the National Board of Directors of the Asian American Journalist Association. Pamela is mom to 15-month-old Eric, who does not have my iPod and my iPhone just yet, but I've told he's very proficient at swiping the screen to get to where he wants to go. Without further ado, I'd like to introduce Pamela Lyb. Thank you very much, Karen. Good morning. It's great to be among so many Davis' parents and caregivers once again. As Karen mentioned, I am mother to a 15-month-old, and since Eric is of the age where his favorite activities are banging on pots and pans and squishing mud between his chubby fingers, you would think that technology's reach would stop short of his everyday toddler existence. But you would be wrong because of the pot banging and play-doh pounding and mud squishing comes to a screeching halt whenever he sees mommy or daddy's iPhone because it is captivating. And without my having to teach him, simply through observation, as Karen mentioned, he's learned to scroll through the photos. Did you know that they have more than 1,000 apps designed for babies and toddlers? They have names like Wheels on the Bus and I Go Potty. So you cannot deny the ubiquity of technology if smartphone apps are marketed to someone who still wears a diaper. So from privacy issues to texting while driving to cyber-rolling and concerns about health effects, the phenomenon of technology is a concern for doctors, psychologists, and parents the world over. So today, we're going to hear from a panel of experts on technology and childhood development. But first, let us briefly recognize our Davis Joint Unified School District administrators. When I call your name, please stand or raise your hands so you can be recognized. With us today is Winfred Rogerson, District Superintendent. I'm the Lady Counselor for Emerson, uping ten counselor for David C. Jr. High. For today's panel discussion, we will be talking with local experts about the developmental, behavioral, social, and even legal implications of kids on technology. We're going to have about a 45-minute discussion and then we're going to take a Q&A from you, the audience. If you have a question during the program, please feel free to jot it down in the index card that you were given when you arrived. If you'd like, you can also write down the name of your name, your school, and the age of your child as well. Now, let us welcome our four expert panelists. Pamela Maury is the Executive Director of Student Services and Secondary Programs for DJUSD and was the founding principal of DaVinci Charter Academy. She is a nationally recognized family online safety expert, mother of five DJUSD students, and founder and president of YourSphere Media Inc. Her company focuses on the family and publishes the Kids Social Network at YourSphere.com. Mary Kay is also an ABC 2020 contributor and has been profiled on CNN, the BBC, and Wall Street Journal. Dr. Stephen Nowicki is a developmental and behavioral pediatrician with his own practice right here in Davis, as the Davis Developmental Pediatrics Group. Steve is also a medical director for Southern Developmental Clinic and a board member for the Yolo County Maternal Child and Adolescent Health Advisory Board. Hime is the supervisor and attorney for the UC Davis School of Law, Family Protection and Legal Assistance Clinic. She supervises law students in various projects as they gave practical legal experience. And one of the projects that Professor Hime currently supervises focuses on raising awareness regarding the legal consequences of cyberbullying, sexting, and sex distortion. Please welcome Dr. Hime. Thank you for the information, age. Technology, of course, surrounds us everywhere. And so there's one thing on a parent in this room who doesn't have a child engaged in some kind of technology device or internet access. So let's begin with where we stand today. How children are benefiting from technology? When you work with UCM, why is technology in our schools? What's the role of technology in our schools? What are you seeing these days? The trending that we have in technology is, I think, can you characterize it in a couple of ways, which I'll teach you more in detail there. The daddy's thing is a constant test, a constant balance of rating, the advantages, the opportunities, the expansion of knowledge, with what is developmentally appropriate, what is safe, and what is right. And those degrees are not nearly as simple as we thought they would be. We're dealing with technology issues that are not even happening at school. They are also then trying to manage the technology and the environments in the classroom simultaneously, and all of that is in the framework of some very challenging liability and financial concerns. Okay, we'll go more in-depth into that a little later on in the conversation. Mary Kay, talk to us about what prompted you to start your company, YourSphere Media. The impact of social media in our lives, and to give you some perspective, if you compare how long it took radio to reach 50 million people, it took 38 years. It took the television 14 years to reach 50 million people. It took the internet four years to reach 50 million people. It took the iPod three years to reach 50 million people. And it took social media a mere nine months to reach 100 million people. None of us had the opportunity, as we were surrounded by a landslide fuel of social media technology around us and our kids. You see a blue F, you see a bird, the four of them, it seems, the four of you, look. We have not had the opportunity to be educated about the power of pitfalls, the rules and the ramifications. Kids obviously are immersed in technology, but we as parents need to help find a solution so that our kids can have safe and positive experience and a balance that the one woman from MIT said, we need that balance. So as a mom of five, I found in YourSphere Media to be able to focus on the family. I was deeply concerned when my daughter was 12, she's now 18, about what was going on in social media on the social networks that kids are participating in. This is now six years ago, obviously social media is part of all of our lives, but I was absolutely deeply concerned about the privacy issues and some of the things that we'll talk about a little bit later. So as a solutions and education oriented company, YourSphere is designed to provide kids all the great things that social media offers them, but while teaching them the importance of why their privacy matters, digital citizenship and providing an age-appropriate environment. YourSphere for parents is your information resource so that when you go home and for all of your parents whose children either have an iPhone or an iPad or an Android or an Xbox or a Wii that you know how to activate the safety settings and you don't really have them on your home computer, but you likely don't have safety settings enabled so that your kids don't see the inappropriate content. And finally, our education non-profit, the Coalition for Internet Safety Education Reform is designed to give schools, communities and families free education resources. This year is a good year, that was when MySpace was a big deal. We use this MySpace, I mean. Yeah, I was just going to speak to how quickly things are moving. Dr. Wickey, as a practicing pediatrician, talk just about how technology plays a role in your practice in the patient play you see. Well, technology is a really big area to talk about. I think there's a lot of benefits that come from technology and there's a lot of tracks for families and for kids. And we tend to talk about kids in terms of a block and they contain all ages of infants. You mentioned you were 15 months old and what to do at certain ages throughout a child's life and prepare them to be successful as young adults and adults. And as the video showed, the things that we might be thinking of is preparing them for concrete is not going to exist in five years or years. So how do you do that? In a way that allows them to, when the new thing comes along, they have a framework to actually adapt, be thoughtful about it, be critical of it and actually be successful with it. So in developmental behavioral pediatrics, there's an explosion in terms of technology to help kids with autism, with developing social skills. There are computer programs that are used to help support working memory or computer programs and interactive software that help children with anxiety disorders. So in terms of treatment approaches, there's an explosion in the scenario. However, it's probably 0.001% of software. So there's a lot of opportunity for kids. I'd really like to kind of back it up a little bit in terms of your pots and pans. Because if you look at children under the age of two, there's zero data that anything that has blinking lights or anything on a box that says, this is the software to help your infant develop faster, better, smarter, there's zero data for that. Most data, 0.002% pots and pans, unstructured, laying, laying with blocks for laying to build, laying with their families face to face. If you look at data for small children in terms of technology versus just with people, people, laying with people is actually more important. Now that doesn't mean that that continues through the adolescent period. So you have to actually help build those communications more quickly. So it's really about communication, really about early childhood support and development. So they have to be able to do that. I'll keep encouraging him to bend on those pots and pans so he might be responsive. Professor Jaime is my colleague at the UC Davis School of Law and the Family Protection and Legal Assistance Clinic has been putting on a lot of seminars in our community. Some of you may have attended one or more of them on cyberbolic, sex day. Tell us what the Family Protection and Legal Assistance Clinic at UC Davis became involved in these issues of technology. Historically our office is represented knowing from victims of domestic violence. But students look for opportunities other than traditional legal litigation to get involved in assisting individuals with legal matters. Quite a few of our students are really interested in working with families and teens. So I asked my students to come up with a presentation dealing with issues related to teen dating violence issues and technology if they found any and immediately in less than a week they came back to me and they said cyberbolic and sex day. And I said run with it. What we started finding out is that this is an emerging area of the law. The ramifications for teens particularly is huge in just opportunities to have a potential criminal record to school discipline being on your record having to impact your college application to job choices and just in general your reputation in the high school community. However as we started looking into it the thing we started realizing is that this is a huge legal issue that dating violence issues are only one small aspect of it. Education code and the ability of the schools to discipline on one side free speech issues on another side civil liabilities for the schools on one side civil liabilities for parents. I think a lot of parents realize that if their children do something online that is actually considered criminal conduct they can be held liable from the monetary fines and the restitution and the other fees that the child might have to face as a result of that. This is an issue it's developing and just as we can't predict what the technologies are going to be the laws are trying to keep up with that the legislature is working very hard at trying to really draft laws that will deal with these issues but with the understanding that the technology of today, the Facebook and the Twitter may not be the technology that everybody is using two years from now and so they need to have something to address these issues but at the same time make sure that the technology changes. I think I'd like to get a show of hands and we have an idea of how old your students are so that we can hear our conversation. Who here has children, kindergarten or younger? And then how about an elementary school? A lot of elementary school parents are middle school and high school so now we know. Pam, why don't you talk to us about schools for the top concerns regarding kids and teens these days? Kids and teens, those three different categories there are there some things that of course go across both of them but our top concerns are number one lack of it we school districts in a time of the forced funding in modern history can't begin to stay current so there's an expectation of the community, there's an expectation and there are four goals related to these things which in, this is just a harsh reality that to expect the public school system or any school system to actually be able to prepare students for their future not right now and not our past is a monumental monetary challenge an example that could go a life back to minimum so on the one hand there are kids and there are other kids who have access to just basic accessibility this is an enormous foundational question further we some folks may be aware and that is essentially to consider how many hours that a child who has access to technology has already spent doing that before they ever arrived at school those of you who had that very young children your kids are already probably aware of technology access if you just compound that and realize that our research indicates 10,000 hours to be an expert or something well some kids come to school with 10,000 hours or some kids that collect 10,000 hours whereas students who do not have those options then come to school without that foundation is it the school's responsibility to provide that foundation for everyone and that is a very important trend in freshman education right now how do we equalize that how do we make that equitable how do we ensure that every child has a pathway into the future technologically there are very important issues about what is developmentally important there is a second area where we just struggle and struggle now if you can say well there is a fundamental arc and you should be able to figure that out not necessarily so we find that let me take two names for example consider how incredibly suited technology is for teenagers it's fat it's a little risky it has no upward limit it is secret it is independent on one hand and it is highly social and high connectivity so all of that is wildly student connected I guess to the development aspect and every one of those things every one of those things would be a reason to say it's not simple for that child it actually enhances speed, impulsivity pressing the limits and then we're back to that balance issue those two trends are very important I think the third one that has to be mentioned is that there is a raging argument going on in the education community nationwide, worldwide about what exactly instructional technology is so are we having technology for technology say? are we having it because since it spills or are we having it in because as the video mentioned it's bells and whistles that are hiding stimuli to students you saw a picture of a brain on Google well it looks a lot like a brain on meth that doesn't necessarily need to be an idea so what exactly are we doing with the tech smart board but we use it like a white board we care we buy everyone iPads but it's the same as a pen and paper who cares on the other hand we invest in robotics and it's hands on, mechanical, spatial it promotes math and engineering you probably have a good idea there so we are ending the throws truly of making sure that we are spending those tax dollars appropriately to enhance education so what you said about the the research can't keep up with what works and what doesn't before there's something else and we have to do a lot of things by the sea of our hands and keep that student-centered focus at all times it's not necessarily popular but what we hope is right about two or three years ago there was a study that came out that said that students were having more time concentrating and even staying awake in class do you still see that? we absolutely see that and parents will loom in but they cannot get their child to school because they're staying up late until late at night um there's solutions we'll get to that but the solution is shut it off and it was in charge of this house anyway the tremendous amount of peer pressure social media and we also don't see um a very curious thing we can address it because we don't understand it in terms of brain development yet and that is that students have a sort of avatar mentality that is very hard to grasp um I don't know where I live there I have set in terms of how we are interrelated we say but I don't like that and we say this is your phone this is your phone and this is what it says and then there's tears and anger but I'm not like that you don't understand that's not really me you hear this and you hear this it's like our ultimate existence and how beautiful for a child to be able to be able to express and impress new identity and new identity limits particularly in the future and that is where the clash that's going on outside of what's going on in school and if it's not school can that's where I live in I can't get in the home door and I was thinking of courage behind the keyboard but I think in addition to that when it sets all of this up if you will regarding and we have slides but there's a top concern that really set this up and it's number one it's lack of parental involvement parental involvement parental education and parental supervision with these devices whether it's a laptop or a phone and at the end of the day we need to teach personal responsibility and a lot of the pitfalls I can tell you can absolutely be avoided when you're digitally educated when you're involved in what your kids are doing because the consequences can be dire and dire ranging from exposure to of course inappropriate content we all know that kids see porn they stumble upon it and secondly you have safety and digital advice they can certainly type in a few words and see what you're protecting from seeing on the computer sites like Facebook it's against a federal law called the Children's Online Privacy Protection Act for any child under the age of 13 to be on Facebook or Twitter my yearbook the culture in Facebook is adult intended it's a very different experience that you have as a parent on Facebook than your child does no, every child isn't going to go play for example SimSocial on Facebook SimSocial allows your child to have a car to get naked and have sex with their friends you're not playing that game smash your past one of the most popular groups in Facebook the goal of smash your past I learned this thanks for the daughter who told me you want to have sex with someone so you put your picture up in the smash your past group an adult man 20-something year olds will comment on your 12 year old daughter whether or not they'd smash her or pass her that's not a reality of what's going on on Facebook that I will argue is unhealthy for our kids in terms of their digital participation privacy, huge, huge issue the fastest growing segment of identity theft is among the children they're signing up for sites asking them that are asking them when they should not be for information such as first name middle name, last name, date of birth, I am email, exact physical location this camera on your child's phone has something in it geotagging geotagging nearly tracks the coordinates of where your child is so your child takes a picture they upload it to Facebook they upload it to Flickr and or snap snap not snapfish but that goes to Instagram and there's an exact digital coordinate to where your child is and people can see that so if your child snaps a photo of check out this new poster in my bedroom someone can find you in two feet where your child lives guess what, you don't have to worry about it you go home and turn off the school that enables those coordinates to take place but you need to understand that we're talking about privacy issues we're talking about content issues we're talking about your kids participating on Facebook find by the FTC for deceptive privacy practices we talked about sex scene I have this conversation with my three boys Phillip Albert, 17 years old being a 16 year old she sent him naked photos they break up, he's 18 senior in high school, he gets mad he chooses to send those photos to a couple of friends, grandma and grandpa guess what he's now registered sex offenders to an age of 43 years old felony distribution of child pornography the laws cannot keep up with the technology 14 year old girl uploads her naked photos to her Facebook profile and he's charged with felony distribution of pornography a young girl in Ohio, 17 years old she sent her boyfriend naked photos he showed them with over 300 different high school students she told herself because of the names that she was called for the mistakes now, when I talk to my kids about you will never get in trouble with somebody else does something stupid with their technology but you need to tell me you need to understand that picture that your friends might take posing a certain way sends their own message it can very easily get another child in trouble and those are things that we as parents need to be able to understand and certainly deal with and then the last two items I want to share with you regarding texting and driving maybe you heard this story just two weeks ago in the Bay Area 17 year old boy he drove his car while texting and killed a father and daughter by driving home if you text and drive you are over 400 times 400% more likely not to be focusing on turning around the wheel there are tools mom and dad that you can use to turn texting off take the elimination away and then sexual predation I know we get bored here for it's important to understand that one in five children are sexually solicited online 14% 15 and 18 year olds said yes although we human person I don't know you 75% of those kids have to be talking to your kids about who they are talking to online and if they don't know them in real life they should not be friends with them online and that's not something by just being a child's friend or social media account can prohibit that from happening because even though you made your child's friend unless there's a tool like you provide parents in your sphere you can see what your child 12 member has been doing on the site that you have no idea the interaction that's going on and the last point is guess what the FTC has made it okay for any school or organization to do the social media background check on your child on you they want to go to college that FTC a college can go and look and see 7 years working data that your child has been posting online my 7 is now 13 talking to him he's intent on getting a college scholarship wants to play in a digital art school I told him you know Jack what kids are doing in posting on Facebook can keep because it has kids from being able to get into the schools that they want so there's some of your consequences so maybe you can have a solution for we'll talk about some of those solutions to Mary Kay is going to give us some very specific instructions and tips that you can take home with you and put to use today you mentioned sex date and cyber bullying and Crystal has a lot of experience with this and maybe you can tell us about your work with cyber bullying and maybe give us some examples as well so cyber bullying they have parents think of it and they think of kids being online and calling each other names but kids from kindergarten and pre-school from high school are very sophisticated in their uses of technology but as sophisticated as their use of technology is a lot of times their judgment is nowhere near their sophistication and so what we're seeing a lot of is cyber bullying is really a myriad of issues so you have kids sometimes making up fake identities and then posting for instance creating a fake Facebook page and then taking photos that aren't that complimentary of that person and posting them and then basically using this page to pick on that person's spread rumors about them or even post things as that person maybe need comments towards another student that that person is best friends with to try and interfere with their relationship and these are innocuous examples of things that kids do when they make up fake identities online kids are also very ecstatic suspicious with their parents right but in their parent community it's no this person was really just trying to be my friend and so sharing passwords or very personal information that someone can easily guess your password or your login ID and then giving someone access to their account information that way chatting with strangers online one of the big things that parents also visualize with cyberbullying is not just the different types of cyberbullying that goes on with the different platforms for the cyberbullying so we've talked a lot about Facebook we've talked a little bit about iPhone but what about iPods I mean there's Wi-Fi and you can connect using Wi-Fi if your child has an iPod and so kids can access the internet if they have an iPod pretty much anywhere these days because Wi-Fi really is anywhere head to head gaming online, Xbox Live kids have been gaming for years I'm going faster than you I'm hitting harder than you whatever game it is they're playing but when they're online because there is a difference on their computer screen type persona they are escalating these types of comments to a much higher level to very violent threats sometimes really inappropriate comments about family members, about other friends and so cyberbullying is much more than just your traditional name calling or even I hate to say threads and it can really take on all of these different levels all of these different versatility and that's what the schools are having different plans you know you think you've seen everything and then you walk into a classroom and my students will talk with teachers and they'll be like we're having this issue and it's like okay we haven't seen that one before but I can hopefully see where that's coming from and this is what teachers are dealing with and it's taking up your children's instructional time as well and teachers are frustrated by this the sexting is another huge concern but in the now the danger the kids can get into we've talked a little bit about creditors being online and I think a lot of times when kids are sexting they really you can tell them but they truly do not process the long term ramifications and like Mary Kay was saying in California if a child is caught sexting if they take the picture of themselves they can be charged for creating child pornography if they take a self portrait for taking a self portrait they created a photograph of a child that was sexually explicit and they themselves can be charged if they forward the photo or even if they show it to someone without even forwarding it that's disseminating child pornography and the thing is in California even the mere possession of child pornography is a potential criminal charge now I haven't personally heard any stories of district attorneys who are charging kids because they innocently received a sex message because I'm hearing this is very common with Mel Roy but you get a child who's I was just talking with a public defender they're concerned if you get a child who's involved in some other kind of activity you're having difficulties and that child is going to be monitored much more closely innocently happen to them but the potential for those criminal charges is very, very real and the sex offender registration if a child is charged with something like that as a result of sexting is a lifelong obligation in those circumstances and now for juveniles that is also going to be a part of the public record available on Mayans law with some very rare exceptions so before it used to be that sex offender registry was a serious consequence for a juvenile but now it's even now much more serious and so we go into the classroom and we really try and educate the students on think before you press enter think before you click it is so easy it only takes two seconds to have a lifetime of an impact on legal consequences Crystal mentioned students sharing passwords can sharing passwords with one another that's like the new pinky swear we're best friends now BFFs we can share passwords from what I understand it's like oh my new boyfriend I really trust each other we're taking our relationship to the next level we're sharing passwords really dangerous for students kids to be sharing passwords with one another Steve the American Academy of Pediatrics recently published an article on Facebook's depression what is that it's really kids really falling into seeking out let's start with depression it's all the same symptoms of depression but it's basically kids becoming self isolated with no real support structures around them having the same clinical structure or symptoms of depression and really lacking a lot of social connection I mean one of the you know there was a recent really scary story about and it involves a bit of I guess sexy where college roommate that videotaped his roommate having sex and then it posted it online and talked about it the young man found out that his sexual activity had been posted online and had been suicide certainly one event like that as even as agreed just as that has not been a cause so much to commit suicide so also a young man who was posting online lots of comments about how he was feeling reaching out to this virtual world how he was feeling and this depressed symptoms and such that went into the cycle world and and he never got any help and then this one last thing was the big point or the depressed individual that then committed suicide so it's that disconnection it's immediate it's fast it's good you did better than trying to have a facebook so you posted a picture you get 14 people liking your picture liking what you say and it just you get to a buzz and then when you're in the real world it's not there for us we had that perspective that well yeah that's on facebook the same graphic the official despair I'm hearing a lot of scary stuff making it really scary making it really scary in that for couple reasons one is I don't want to say you're not doing this you can ruin your whole life over you can do all of this you know kids are biologically programmed to take this to define over time who they are and find themselves as an individual that is biologically in their become individuals the problem is is that they've been given the space where it's perceived to be safe and it's horrible basically but it doesn't seem to be so when you guys out here are the most powerful people to change that and it comes you mentioned teaching or going into a classroom and telling that I don't think it can keep it real doesn't it it's helpful but it's not as effective as from a very early age modeling how you handle your health how you handle your media how you engage it and how you refuse to not disengage your kids I see one of the most disturbing things for me over the last four or five years is moms or dads and they're strollers with small infants and they're strollers and they're texting on the phone and the kids like almost curling backwards over the top of this then trying to get eye contact and some interaction with them disconnected and then when they finally take something out of the crib and whirl it at someone and hit someone with it and then finally get some attention then they're like then they're punched and it was totally it's like driving while you're texting you're going to crash into a tree if you're parenting while texting the kids are going to throw something at you so staying engaged in the lines that are actually going to be up on the technology so and being sensitive to what they're doing being firm about your own family values where you want that to be and engage them and debate and engage them in discussions and have them talk about one of the most important things you said is that if you run into this I want to know about it and please tell me because I want to know about my 18-year-old driving program if you happen to be at a party and you're drinking oh, I'm not going to go to sleep I'm just going to come pick you up we'll talk about it the next day there's a timeline that's there and you model that if you have an 18-year-old driver or a 17-year-old driver you're home and you've gone to a party and you're like see I have too much to drink and you call your 18-year-old son you don't have too many beers can you come pick me up sure, yeah, I'll do it sure, mom, I'll do it and he's probably not going to do it until the next morning but you've just created a situation where he's like okay, that's right that's the way to do it so modeling is so important absolutely makes sense it's just like your developmental pediatrician will tell you that the best way to teach your kids manners is to say please and thank you but to say please and thank you yourself and to the child and to model the behavior I know that you were paying close attention to what Steve was saying because part of why I'm so happy to very case out the game which Steve said is that just as there's this separate avatar mentality that I'm calling you for the day there's a curious parallel to the parents such that, for example carefully putting play dates in nursery school and has made sure the language class has started at the proper age very very carefully monitoring sometimes associate the social media and the technology life with my child's generation it's sort of that hands off that's all you know they're like that it's what my favorite zits and I have a bunch of them laminated in my office about technology and teenage development this notion that the parents they watch they're amazed they don't understand but they are separate from that action that is my child's world that they're living in and I'm not being that they've never allowed them to run around cities they don't know or to just completely give up human interaction or to break laws just willy nilly and possibly so the message I think you're going to all hear today is that from the technology has rendered the past educating and parenting model obsolete we used to be parents were and what teachers were the arbiter of knowledge we got to decide what was the knowledge and what was bad knowledge and what you will be taught and what you will not be taught technology has rendered that obsolete neither parents nor educators can be sages on the stage anymore this is a collaborative process it demands collaboration it demands that the student is both parties the teacher is both parties and then from an education point of view I am a teacher where the parent as an educator does need to claim the final judgment because that is the adult position to take we do have experience we are charged with that final decision about how things will be used not used have to not happen which is part of what the tools are about but the process is collaborative it should be classroom we are struggling to make a new a cyber culture a positive cyber culture at the same time as we are making a classroom culture campus culture and so on so please consider that you will have to get your hand and you will have to save the child how do I open that show me what that does and be a partner in the learning so you just answered my next question which was exactly what can parents do today if they indeed want their kids to enjoy technology in a safe and positive way it is for parents to really get up to speed and get involved let's turn Mary Kane out for some practical tips about coming up to speed for parents who are less tech savvy than our kids what should they know when they are going to take some things off when they give their child a smartphone internet access and so forth and so on can I answer that in 20 seconds because I just wanted Steve touched on the fact that a lot of them get things I want parents to feel good about their kids use of technology feel good about social media when it's in the right context in the right environment because unlike any other media where radio you listen the songs are created for you TV someone keeps the shit and shows social media our kids are the collaborators they're the contributors they're the writers, they're the architect they're the content there are many wonderful things to be had from social media so don't feel bad about social media just make sure it's the right social media because good things can happen and our kids are picking up digital literacy skills whether it's learning how to upload a photo HTML, CSS those are things that as contributors either to their education or to getting into college or a job they're applying skills that they absolutely need so feel good about it it's not about my husband five years ago said Mary Kay our life was simpler when there wasn't a cell phone, there wasn't a computer let's get through it and everything let's go in the back there and dig a hole so you're ahead of me so please feel good about the use of technology just be involved so to answer your question what you should do is breathe then go home and make a commitment make a commitment that you will start the dialogue today you will continue with the dialogue you will talk about technology with your child as much and as often as you do about you know depending on the age of your child of course kindness how you are in the play yard what you do in school alcohol, safe sex all the topics that you and as a parent will talk about when it comes to the actual digital devices your go-to resource for information is your sphere www.sphaeryforparents.com you need to safety enable all of the digital devices in your home and that's not difficult to do it will take an initial in the middle of two hours of time I literally laid we have laid on our kitchen table we have three laptops an Xbox two B's an iPads two i-touches and a desktop you can safety enable those devices that's just the foundation that's the foundation because once your child is a digital participant they need to be learning and practicing with digital citizenship skills they need to be hearing from you and I'll share a story about what's not okay one of my sons went on his brother's iPod touch and texted someone and said something mean under his brother's name so we went to that family and we apologized for what my son said today I could use you know just be funny didn't really mean it he was really keeping his brother but that was mean so we need to take into each person really when it comes to cell phones I recommend starting slow for the parents who have kids in it depending when you decide to give your child a cell phone I recommend that you make it a cell phone or a social media site I'm sorry to interrupt I had this nicely organized let me start with social media your child's over the age of 13 they do not follow on Facebook they do not follow up it sends a message it's okay to live that's not a whole world with family message reports and there are the many inappropriate things we talk about there are age-appropriate alternatives when it comes to the gaming accounts my son doesn't like this but we don't buy the live version I know way too much about the things that go on in the live version and it's not a healthy culture if you want to play live get concerned about how something new cell phones start slow give your kids a chance to follow your rules you can download the technology contract all of my kids my two older ones are in college but at some point everyone in my house signs the technology contract there are clear rules about what's appropriate what's okay, what's not okay they break the rules and we had a discussion about they wanted to add some rules they had a box on during the week, 15 minutes a day wasn't enough for Xbox during the week but there always seems to be homework or sports so they had input on what some of the rules are but if you give your kids the clear boundaries that teach and tell them what's okay for technology use and the way to act and the way to use their tools they know what the consequences are it's a wonderful place to start you can go back to the contract you understand what the consequences are so do that I also recommend that you don't allow your children to use video chatting sites we only touched a little bit on sex distortion but unfortunately just tell your kids, you know what our family we don't do video chatting sites you don't need to tell them the names of the video chatting sites just say no video chatting sites what I said earlier make it easier for kids to follow the rules I've used this in my house AT&T smart limits allows you to turn off texting during the school day now end of the overnight hours and at night our rule at our house was the phone needs to be downstairs at night someone would come downstairs at the moment out of bed and bring the phone back upstairs or take out the SIM card and put it in another device after a lot of agonizing and this was now a while ago so thankfully some of the technology has caught up with some of the problems that we parents face it's so easy now I can just go type in the cell phone is off during school hours there's no texting you guess what my kids sleep at night they're not waking up and the bags under the eyes not able to get to school so it just makes it easy for our kids to follow the rules and take the cell phone by someone to wait until 8-12 and he knows that he can't bring it to school he knows it's off at night and he's excited to have the technology I'm excited because I'm not arguing with him I'm not worried so please use the technology that exists at your home for parents we list the free stuff we list the paid for stuff and then finally I recommend that on your kids cell phone and your computers there's some sort of momentary software I'm not talking about you may not have heard of spyware but there's something that literally you can see every single thing that your child writes I don't advocate for that unless you have a child that's proven to you repeatedly that they won't follow your rules and are engaging in very, very risky behavior that could end up with legal consequences but I do recommend and I've used this software that brings alerts for example there's a texting app the texting app allows me to see concerning words I want to know if my son broke her rule I even don't use profanity or someone that didn't know texted him and said call me whatever the words are there are alerts that you can get so that then you can have a conversation with your child and the same thing with the monitoring software on the cell phone and on the computer you want to have an alert I want to have an alert that comes to my my phone or my email that says these phrases were used so that if your child knows that as my kids do they're responsible for what they do and say they know that my involvement is about helping them make choices and me as a parent helping you keep them safe so all of the things that I've shared with you you can do today and over a series of weekends or at night and all of the information is free and available at NorthSphere.com right up there NorthSphere.com the final slide has resources only we'll hold it up for you shortly Crystal what do you want parents to know about legal repercussions or legal protections when it comes to online matters so I think the question about legal protections is a big one because so far a lot of people have just been trying to keep up with making sure that crimes are being dealt with making sure that individuals are protected and staying safe but the laws there are some legislators who are more on a cutting edge and they're starting to introduce legislation to protect victims as well so rights that victims have if you've been a victim of cyberbullying if you've been a victim of identity theft if you've been a victim of some kind of a cybercrime whether you're a school-aged child whether you're an adult and that's some kind of compensation that can be afforded to you this is another issue of the law that's evolving and I think Dr. Ramaki's point was exactly on point legal consequences are very severe and like I said your kids don't understand I go into the classroom I can educate them on it but what really really makes the impact is your discussion with them and we've done parent presentations as well and it's also, you know Yolo County is a very diverse county we have a very high educated community in Davis we have West Sacramento which is more of an urban community we have our rural communities there's a spardo that can sometimes be very mixed and what students are across the board saying to me is I don't know all the technologies my child are involved in I have no idea there were so many dangers out there and then they also want to know about the positive uses of technology and they're not engaging with your children on this platform and I totally root them the way to, you know is by being engaged with them communicating with them we can go in and give a one-time presentation outside of them you know a teacher can raise it in a classroom as it comes up a couple months later everybody forgets about it and this is what high school is like I mean in some ways it's kind of merciful that it can be so forgiving but it's also a dangerous thing you are there every day you are the ones who should be supervising and be involved with them and the best way to eliminate your child who will risk or significantly reduce them is to be involved with them be educated and that's a huge part of this you have to be really educated about two things you have to be educated about the technology your child is using and you have to be educated about the law because if you aren't educated about both of those your risks are still out there I mean some kids aren't intentionally using technologies that they're facing what was it a few years ago the legal issues that we have with kids in technology with all the downloads from Napster and other sites like that kids have all these civil judgments against them that's kind of a past phase now that's an issue that's working itself out in court and now we're talking about criminal issues and who knows whether it will be a civil or a criminal issue two years from now but you as a parent if you stay educated on what the trends are and there's actually a state office the California Office of Privacy Protection that has a great website where they have information about current legislation pending legislation and they also have a bunch of links to different social media websites very similar to your sphere with tips on helping your children get involved in technology risks and dangers that are out there we've talked a lot about strangers we've talked a lot about being educators but I think one of the things that we haven't talked about is the peer groups that your children are associating with online because sometimes that's very different than the friends you allow to come into the home or the friends that they associate with and being educated about who that peer group is a lot of kids are online with a range of people adults little kids kids their age individuals who are employed individuals who are in school and we think about the exposure that they're getting social media is about sharing your experiences and they are being exposed to all of those different experiences being aware who your kids are friends with online maybe sometimes having some limitations on those is a huge step because if you don't know have the conversation with your kids about you don't know what the person is who's sitting on the other side of the screen there's actually a really funny cartoon in Spanish the Spanish government came up with along these lines where this girl is sitting online and she thinks she's talking to this guy you know she's sitting on a beach and she's like texting live photos of herself and she thinks she's talking to this young kid because there's a photograph of you know these are all cartoon characters with this young attractive buff looking guy and you know they're having this conversation and it escalates and it escalates and finally he's like well send me a picture of yourself and so you know it kind of implies that she sends an inappropriate picture to herself and then the next screen shot is actually not just the screens but the screen and the very very lay of the heavyweight you know older gentleman I shouldn't say gentlemen we're sitting on the other side of the screen and this is the reality you know about what your kids are actually facing online it seems innocuous but you have no way of actually verifying a person's identity and you know just not being friends with people you don't know and being educated and the resources the state office of privacy protection okay so that and more spare for parents or two places that even go for some more practical tips Dr. Wickey from the perspective of a medical professional what practical tips do you want to look at today your kids talking with your kids that be collaborative with your kids you know there's no way that you're going to know you want them to explore things so that they become individuals but that's going to happen because as the technology changes you can be up to date on this website and your website is going to be updated it's going to be updated and no one else is going holy smokes dad did you see this site and you'd be like oh my god that's what you want to have is that they'll come to you and show you what's going on or you have a conversation so what's the scariest thing you've seen on here you can have a frank discussion for I'll ask those things when I see an adolescent in my office who's having some challenges I'm saying what's the nonliest thing out there what's our it's just to show that yeah I'm on a touch and as much as I want to feel like I am I'm not and say but I'm going to come to you and understand what your world's about we're going to work collaboratively on it I respect you as an individual and as a human being and I want you to be safe and I want to help you and all the data shows that you know even though you have a teenager that's arguing and saying and giving you that look of disgust and you don't want to do anything and you know who chipped you out of the starvation high school that really they are heavily influenced by your opinion by your thoughts and they may give you that look of and they even go let me pull that over and I think about it it plants a seed and it's incredibly important it comes up over and over and over again working together with your kids if that's something that's you're like oh I don't know how to I'm having difficulty talking about these things to my child there's a good website that has great vignettes it's a psychologist at Harvard it's called www.livesinthebalance nospaces.org and there's vignettes on how to families to come together on how to collaboratively solve problems when we talk about you mentioned arguing and I slide because the flip side of arguing is today and we want to get away from arguing with our kids where we're in a strong position it's my way to the highway as long as you're under my roof those things that's the paradigm it's going away the paradigm a teacher sitting in front of the classroom saying this is the knowledge I want you to take away from you have the guy saying we have the devil's people on the planet because you can't rattle off 150 art history values what's the use of memorizing all that stuff so you're on a new level or at least look it up and this is happening in medicine we can look it up in the room so it's a great thing as long as we know that if you read it once in one place you can't trust it you have to really do some research so talking with your kids solving problems you sort of under your breath said there are some things that helped me make some changes on the rules in the contract and that's hugely important that's the big part you want them engaged in the contract you want to say I could live with that rule we might have to come back and revisit it it doesn't work out but I'm cool with running with that one that's really the important part because the technology is the red herring it's going to change I think when they came out with a pretty crest it's the most rapid distribution of information in the history of this plant but it's going to change so much faster to give dates how fast it was 200 million people it's going to be millions of seconds and I love it I'm an artist and an inventor on YouTube I want to do the wildest craziest things and do power front suspension in what evening so it's incredibly powerful you have to understand I also have to wake up the next day for the work so that's what I think Steve what practical quick tip do you have for say parents in your practice who are asking for recommendations on hours of screen time it depends on the age and it depends on what it is you don't have a screen in my home until after kids do it I try to keep it as real as possible in your person no TV, no iPad, no DVDs there's really no benefit you want all that off you don't want that distraction you want people focused on faces I mean there are kids that most kids will do just fine with that type of distraction and kids who are really at this for having significant language delays and social delays who are more part of all of this and they can't figure out is this real, people are real faces are real social stuff and then as you get older the screen time changes is it a mind sync where they're just turning in to a YouTube video and really not engaged in it and you're coming up with the next brilliant idea and throwing things together I hear about kids the screen was saying 50 hours away that's what it takes you know I want to stay away from absolute numbers because I think it's something that is different for each family it's going to be coming together and negotiate that if I say it's 8 hours a week it's at 15 or 20 hours a week and you immediately come home and it's at 8 hours a week and it's like going to be a nuclear bomb and that's not going to help anyway it's not going to help you it's not going to help your child understand if you see where the screen time has interfered it's not going to work collaboration at work with that you have to say I see this as a problem what do you think? well yeah I do have sort of crummy days can we do something about that? well one you can go and shut down which I think is great when you start from a young age and that's sort of the culture that they're coming up in but if all of you go home and shut up all that stuff in the middle of the day there are going to be some nuclear explosions out there so you have to engage the kids we have to talk about what that project is what it's going to look like let them negotiate that that ideal place where it's going to work for your family so that when you leave school so if you have a very authoritarian thing in your home when they're AT and they leave for Berkeley or MIT or Stanford or Lincoln Tech they have their own department and then they take all this stuff they won't know how to manage it they'll have their own little mini nuclear bomb when they come home a semester later they won't doubt because I just I didn't know how to do it all the time so that's why I'm not going to give a number you know people will give you a number two out of five you'll know when it's too much isn't it like the rest of their life small or ancient? it's like exercise, bats doctors or doctors like any other thing that we can be easily compelled to possess and then it's starting to disrupt the positive expectations and the positive aspects of life when it's disrupting schoolwork against society when friends disappear it's too much I'd like to take some questions from the audience now if you have questions that you've written down in your cards or you need a new card please pass your questions to the volunteers that are walking around in the next minute or so in the meantime as those questions are being collected please join me in welcoming the co-chairs for today's program Karen Lake Sloan and Jody Lieberman to the stage to say a few words good morning community-wide period KQ12 who presents the period university lecture series is already working on our next program in the fall we'd like to continue the conversation I mean Clifford Nass of Stanford University to Davis Nass we just saw in the film Digital Nation has done extensive studies on multi-tasking and should be ready to launch his new book hopefully at our event so as you know these types of programs where was I we need, see that's why I lost my I was going to picture you guys at these types of programs it does take funding and we need to pay for the speakers the facility publicity so we do want to thank our PTAs and PTOs they for allocating annual funds for our KQ12 committee we're in our third year but we also need support today so we can continue to offer these programs for free to the community today we ask that each one of you can please donate a minimum of a dollar and if you can do that if you can do more that would be super for your convenience we have a ballot box outside on a table when you walk and exit out where there is literature of all of our experts up here they have left some literature some information so there are ballot boxes there drop a dollar or more in the air and if you'd like to read a check just make it out to YFRC which is our pastor account and just put parent ed in the memo I'd also like to one last note to recognize IRH Institute of Restorative Health it's a top-notch health wellness center here in Davis we want to thank them for not only being a former sponsor when we brought Madeline Lapine here from Stanford but they provide us the use of their office furniture for our stage show so Davis connections are important thank you for making parent ed a priority I'd like to thank our wonderful panelist because I think they've shared some really valuable information with all of us today and our fabulous moderator thank you for being here today I'd like to thank my co-chair Joe Newton who is without her this event wouldn't have been possible and all of the parent ed reps here and not able to be here these people come together once a month and create this programming for all of the schools and that's a very important job in our community to keep parent ed alive and well so with that we're going to move to the Q&A section and then we will adjourn thank you for the questions I want to just mention two things the Davis Parents Place website has a lot of links for today's program it has digital nation follow-up questions you can go online and watch the prior digital nation YouTube and the full show is great we had to take the very best excerpts but at parentplacedavis.com you can find a lot of other links and resources that are very helpful as you kind of work your way through this environment Davis Media Access is here today we're giving as well so this show will be on cable and available through them and then the last thing that I want to say is all three of my kids and my good kids they all had some mishap my 7-year-old spent over $100 in one day on children's on her iPod with that money and then my 14-year-old went on a public chat with her girlfriends and said hey let's go watch this movie at this time at this theater and they didn't know and so to know that we have these resources to help us when we get into these situations we can all be proactive we didn't know about we didn't know about it's good to know we have these resources available to us thank you our first question says my son is 10 he's had facebook since he was 8 most of his classmates have facebook accounts and they all chat in light of the 13-year age rule for having a facebook account should he stop using this account or is it possible to monitor that from a legal perspective can it remain legal if the user is 10 who wants to take it we can't change the law but I think you you have to deal with the situation that you're in right now and I think that's what they would address just is because I think if you pull the rug out especially if that has been a social platform for your child you're probably going to find out he's going to have access somewhere else and he's going to do it to you anyway and ultimately just like the television media I'm old enough to remember there was only ABC, CBS and NBC and now you have all these great kids in a specific channel Nickelodeon Disney what's happening in the social media world is exactly happening there are now kids specific channels if you will so perhaps your 10-year-old 20% of yours for your members also have a facebook account perhaps yours for your only player we believe in work there are other kids specific social networks that you can give your 10-year-old the opportunity to try a membership at your school or another kids specific network allow him to or her to continue facebook but you may pleasantly find that he or she may enjoy a kid specific network instead of adult one I would like to add on that we are already seeing many of the vaccine school from children under the age of 13 the intersection of developmental the child's developmental progress and the opportunity of facebook are in our minds incompatible so I like these suggestions I am just compelled to tell you that we have already had the experience of 8-year-old posting suicidal ideation and absolutely blowing up this is the process of the school following day children should have a bad age should be talking to human beings and not have a secret world in which they are functioning in our community and to follow that I think this is what we learned I know you had it you should be talking about what's going on kids don't have a difference if they are close breast symptoms or suicidal thoughts they feel that they are actually reaching out unfortunately it's falling on no ears that can help unless you tag it with something and suicide puts up on my head no what I was thinking in terms of monitoring what a site that does a body by law what a child you as a parent have a dashboard everything your child has posted so you should be talking about that of course but if someone posts you don't know that those sites that comply with the law why you collapse is to see if your child is posted and this is an opportunity for you to educate as well you came here today and you got educated if your child has maybe other friends that you know their parents online which I hope is the case but if you know some of those other parents going to those other parents I know that our child our friends together on Facebook I just found out that there's this federal law and you know I found two or three of these other posts I'm considering having my child join these sites where you think about moving over so your child has the people who are making that move with them as well to help have an adjustment and sit down and be like hey you know what I just talked to someone so it's a moment he's going to be okay and I'll put his account on your sphere or wherever and doing it kind of in a positive way to make that transition I have here are two questions and they're actually rather similar this one says you know are some things he knows everything because he's 17 he has 900 friends on Facebook and he claims there are protections for honors so I don't need to worry I see that his peers also have several hundred friends what to do and that's almost I mean it sort of ties into this question too that says what are your thoughts on eliminating a child's Facebook friends do you really accept true friends is there a way to limit the number of friends the answer is no there is no tool there is no tool to do so on facebook.com correct what do you think about someone having 900 friends I think that's a reflection of social media and how narcissistic and convenient and how our kids are losing sense of what a real friend is you know and it's it's a reflection of the reality that they met someone at a party or they met someone at a sporting event and they said hi and I was on facebook so it happens it's far too common but it happens it's only particularly concerning that they don't really know them and as we mentioned the culture and the experiences that they're exposed to so all we need to do is say hold on to all the 900 friends but as sitting on it going through your child's friends and asking them who they know how they know them once again this is a collaborative educational process between parent and child it is a values discussion it is a it is a phase to phase discussion it's intensely interpersonal it allows the parent to know much more about facebook and who these people are and it also builds trust between the parent and child that the parent can say I'm not going to take away your friends I'm never going to take away your friends I do want to talk about what a friend is what friends I friend and how I put my limits on and see if we can come to something that is going to make you to go and feel safe can't you respond astonishingly well to a question that is what do you need to do so that I can feel safe please tell me what you can do so that I can feel safe and they know and they will tell us they will tell us as teachers they will tell us as parents you just have to hold your case really still because the answer is not what you're going to expect and you have to be absolutely cool but if you say what time do you think you should come home that extension of caring that absolute unconditional positive regard for teachers, for parents we're all the same we're all teaching, we're all parenting so that unconditional positive regard to the degree that I will protect you and we're going to have to work together at it those nine different friends have found this conversation this question ties into that too you're talking about coming from a place of caring where you talk to them I have a 12 year old son and my son says how come you don't trust me how do I explain why the internet is being limited I think that this is an issue where I am as a parent I'm glad that I have the little training that I have because quite frankly sometimes I used to do my parenting it's very helpful and I think that last question and this question both reflect on the questions that our kids are answering sometimes it's well I'm authority okay here's my statement get ready for it but sometimes the best response is not always a statement back to them but another question do you really think that I trust you you know I've given you these opportunities do you really think I don't trust you and then if the child says yes but you know I do trust you can you think of other reasons why I might be setting this limit or why we might be having this conversation with other people what role do you think they play in my concerns responding to your child's questions not only is it not having necessarily from a place of judgment or being completely authoritarian but it's helping them to process and think so just to stop with what you said when they go off to Berkeley or they go off to Sanford or they go off to another college they're not just sitting behind a screen for a minute you know why am I doing this what if there are better options is there a better solution how do I respond to this and they're not just doing something automatically in regards to it I've said to my kids well trust has to be firm first of all it's just not legitimate and with the internet you know I've said to my kids the internet was in social media wasn't created it's a wonderful remarkable the great things that exist but unfortunately like the rest of the world there's all that other really bad stuff so with technology I need to you need to earn our trust and let's take it maybe steps I need an example I use to be starting with an iPod touch and texting there once my son is able to show me the text responsibly then he graduated to a non-smartphone and then the next school graduated to a smartphone and so if you explain to your kids that there are things content that will come to them that's there that they may not go out and seek that can put their privacy or safety etc if you explain to them that and that's why this is why we're limiting the things that you can do so that they learn along the way I shared with my 12-year-old son about you know the college scholarships or lots of PNCA athletes because of what the boys posted on Facebook and I said Jack before you post anything when you're in college he's going to be on Facebook I won't even say why don't I have that conversation with me you know maybe this is one of those times I should just not post so at least we've had the conversation they're involved with us they're understanding that there are consequences and they may still make that mistake and they'll be adults they'll need to like all of us learn from their mistakes we haven't been given the opportunity really to have that dialogue with our kids you mentioned one thing that trust is there and that's really true and it's gained through setting limits and encouraging them to be independent and building that the one thing that's not earned is respect a little bit on the first response you have is you don't trust me what do you mean? of course we don't we're just cutting them off and not listening to kids so respecting children helps them respect themselves and helps them respect others it also builds empathy so that if you actually listen to your child I hear you saying that you feel that I don't trust you and what's up with that? I don't that's out of the I don't that shocks me and I don't want to know why and so you're going to listen to your child building matter and that's empathy respect and then as they also you have to earn their trust to you so that's the other side of it is that they have to be able to trust you to be able to share something shocking or scary or something and trust that you're not going to fly off the handle as what they've said you'll make such a big deal about it so those are statements well I want to I want to understand and I want to understand where you're coming from and then we'll work on it together so then there's trust built the other direction then they can if they're honoring something that's scary they can trust that you're going to be here to help them be safe we've just a couple of minutes left to get through a few more questions so quick answer here this is Mary Kayer she's able to undo safety settings that parents put into their phones or other technology particularly the iPhone no so you're in charge once you've once you've set it and set yes and unless you give your child the passcode don't do that you know it's awarded to the passcode and we have set by set picture instructions step by step picture instructions on how to set the settings you know I'll just share with you I'll share with you that for example we don't allow our child to have explicit lyrics and of course he didn't like that idea but we had a conversation about why explicit lyrics you mean listen to music with explicit lyrics exactly exactly you can set the settings so they can't download anything with explicit lyrics or is there any I'm sorry that's my old mistake I'm sorry so some of the texting I wrote an article that was published on yesterday or they were on the apps to stop texting while driving the free one your kids for example could undo that application that would allow them to drive and text some of the paid for ones they can't undo it so so content filters on this knowing the controller as long as you keep the password and of course everything is age appropriate it's nice to know probably that you can set limits for apps for those nine and under fall one under and then 17 and above and as well as New York as well so there's a lot of room for customization there is how does the app know that you're actually driving is it sensitive emotion it's GPs for GPs okay so you can tell that you're moving fast yes and I would just add to that that is one way to help your child protect your child but that's only one and the dialogue and the conversation becomes really important because your child might have those security settings on their phone but do the other kids on the fifth grade playground who have the smart phones you know your child might not have the smart phone they might have a simple phone but what do they have access to through other people like I said I've gone into some of the more rural communities in Yolo County and the parents have no internet at all not because they're instant because they can't afford it or they just don't have access where they live they have a basic cell phone that they have with them that work all day like my child has a Facebook account somehow and so that you know this is why the conversation and the dialogue are so important because you can take those steps but taking them with your child becomes really important so that they're thinking about whether you can see other people's phones who don't have those same guards or filters on them here's a question about the front line show maybe Karen can answer this is that front line still available on the front line website online it is okay so front line PBS and then you can find the last line race see the entire thing and it also has additional links further conversations with some of the some of the experts and professors that were highlighting okay so if you go to the PBS it's probably PBS.org front line site the name of the program you can find that there yes it's really good but the same sort of one yes and another question here please give the name of the website that has laws regarding technology and social media again that was the state office California state office of privacy and protection it's the state office of privacy and protection it's through the secretary of state's office and they don't have this easy URL for you to come around so you need to Google it and you will get to it if you Google state office of privacy and protection or you know children's or laws or things like user friendly website I think someone from parent university was trying to help make it available on their website as well potentially so it would be a one more question this person writes I've just finished reading a book that ends on a particularly hopeful note of the power of the virtual world to organize her hope when it's hopeful about technology and having parents I've seen a lot of really great things so inspired by the kids for example a girl who started a group called lemonade warriors she's a member of yours fair and she's using social media and her blog to help educate other kids about she started selling lemonade made money of course donated it now she's teaching other kids about how to have colorful parties there's another girl her name's Katie she's Katie Katie's crops and Katie is helping kids in other communities girl girl garden she used tutorials and some videos and they donate the food to you know communities in need we have a young writer's program at North Sparrow we have over 60 young writers that have had the opportunity to interview celebrities we've had their work published so as I said earlier social media is a wonderful media participatory there are many good things that kids are doing and they're able to connect with other kids around the world be exposed to different cultures have different conversations and our education can extend beyond the classroom education is at the fingertips and I'm very hopeful because I believe that we're raising you know it's a very smart generation and I believe also that an open parent will tell you it was tough when I was raising you I believe our job is tougher because our parents have technology where the digital immigrants are kids of the natives but I'm also here to tell you the time is over for us to feel overwhelmed because there are solutions now but the exciting part is we're right on we're right in the middle of it we're at the top we're at the top we're at the peak and so many good things ahead we're critical with that I'd like to thank our panelists for being with us today and sharing their their wonderful knowledge thank you to all of you thank you for joining us Evan Reader is selling books related to the information page one of those really few you've heard of Good Night Moves which was called Good Night Eye Path Evan Reader will donate 10% of all book sales from today's program to the parent education collaborative so if you stop under table on the way out then that's good news for parent education collaborative volunteers are finding out flyers are competitive and they'll include an array of resources on parenting and the information page is being gave because the parent's place is website feel free to give your knowledge to the volunteers thank you