 This is why Narcissists hate your happiness welcome everyone to another Narc survivor live video How's everyone doing? Where's everyone from? Let me know your names down below in the live chat Let me know who you are where you're from Love to hear from you Cosmo Slotnik from USA Yvonne Flores From Fresno CA I'm guessing that's California John Tracy from UK Gaza from Melbourne, Australia Hannibal from Los Angeles Hannibal that's your actual name That's a very unusual name Reminds me of that movie Hannibal Lecter Norman from Canada Teresa from New York The Adventures of Kaz from South Wales I'm from there Majora from Nigeria Paddy from Africa So we've got people from all over the world in here today It's good to see it's good that my message Is reaching people all over the world It's great to see that So in this one We're going to be talking about Why the narcissist Hates your happiness But before I begin Please give the video a thumbs up down below As it will really help the YouTube algorithm To spread this message to other survivors But first before I begin as well I'm going to turn off this air conditioning Because it's been on for a while and it's pretty cold now So yes I mean as I've already said in the title The narcissist does hate your happiness They don't like it They hate to see you happy They hate to see you experiencing satisfaction or fulfilment They hate to see you enjoying a positive or a lifting experience Or anything that supports your progress And that just completely destroys their narrative off the bat already Because that's the thing I mean if someone's a problem They're banned, whatever it is You go to one to see that person happy Being successful, moving on So already that just doesn't even make any logical sense whatsoever But here's the reason This is why they hate you And they hate your happiness It's because Unlike many of us here Narcissists lack effective empathy Which means that they cannot Feel another person's emotions As if they were their own This is why When they're hurting you They're causing you pain and distress They can't feel your pain They can't feel what you're going through But they're high in cognitive empathy So they can read into your emotions They do know exactly what you are feeling It's just your emotions do not affect them So if you feel sad They don't feel sad as well Well if you're dealing with an empath If you feel sad They're going to take on that emotion straight away And they're going to try to make you happy As many of us do ourselves And it's not just with your native emotions But also your positive emotions as well So when you're experiencing happiness The narcissist is not feeling that off of you So when you're happy it doesn't make them happy It doesn't have a direct effect on them As it might for us Because when I see someone who's happy and joyful It tends to make me really happy as well That's why I love it when I hear from you And you tell me that you're moving on With your lives And things are getting better for you You find a happiness whether it's alone or with someone else Honestly nothing brings me more joy than that Than when I receive these positive emails Let's me know that I've made a difference in people's lives Which is what I'm trying to do That's what I have been doing And that's how many of us feel When we're around people who are happy, they're joyful It makes us feel good But for the narcissist they cannot share your feelings of happiness Because they don't have effective empathy But remember they do have cognitive empathy So they know exactly how you're feeling They know when your vibration goes up When you're experiencing happiness You're full of life, love and energy Yes they recognise that But it's not doing anything for them They can't share your happiness Which is why it may be very frustrating for you at times Because you may try to act all joyful Thinking that it's going to affect them But it just makes them more mad And it makes them more mad because they envy your happiness They can read into it, they can tell when you're happy But they can't share that with you No matter what they can never share your happiness So all it does is just irritate them And this is why they're always so contrary and adverse I mean you may look at the narcissist that you're dealing with And you may just scratch your head sometimes and think Why can't they be more loving, more affectionate, more kind Why can't they cooperate with me And we can do things together Why can't it be like that But of course it can never be like that Because anything they do for you to make you happy They're looking at it like, yeah, if I do this for you It's going to put a smile on your face You're going to be cheerful You're going to be happy But I'm still going to be miserable It's not going to do anything for me It's how they think And it's true Anything they do for you, yes, it might make you happy If they were to be more kind, more loving, more affectionate Which as we know is the opposite of how they tend to be But that's not going to do anything for them It's not like a normal relationship And it's never going to be I don't know, you personally of course I don't know how many normal situations Or relationships you have experienced But I can say that I have experienced a few myself That's just the most amazing feeling in the world Like when you give someone a hug And it feels all warm and fuzzy for you And it's like you can look in their eyes And you know, they're sharing that same experience But I hope this doesn't trigger anyone If you haven't got to experience that Of course I pray and I hope that you will If you haven't yet But I just wanted to share My experience with you To help you to understand Because it's so different with a narcissist They can't do anything positive For you or with you Because they feel like that's taking something away from them Because they envy your happiness They can't share it Because they lack effective empathy And that's why it's like No matter how much you try to make them happy You try to satisfy them It just doesn't make a difference It doesn't change anything Because they feel like that's taking something away from them It doesn't change anything Because they already know As an empath, that's what you want You just want to see them happy with you And they already know As soon as I act like I'm grateful For what you're doing for me As soon as I show my satisfaction Then I'm giving you satisfaction And then that's going to make you feel good And then I'm going to envy you And it will make me feel bad That is how they are thinking As crazy as that sounds And I know this because I've had so many experiences with narcissists I know exactly how they think And they think this way This is why it's like you're never on the same page No matter what you do It's like they never understand you They never want to understand you They never want to be on the same page Because they already know straight away If they do that It's just you, you're going to be the one who's happy You're uplifted They're still going to be miserable Because they can't share your happiness And they're going to envy you And that's why it's like an uphill battle Especially if you're dealing with a narcissistic parent It's like when you're younger They hold you up to these impossible expectations They want you to be everything That they fail to achieve But then at the same time It's like the more you try The more you succeed The crazier they get And then they even try to sabotage your success Because then they can see Yes You're happy You're successful But because they lack effective empathy They cannot share your happiness Or your success Your accomplishments And yet they have cognitive empathy So they can read into your emotions And then they just envy you Because of that So this is it This is the reason Why they hate your happiness And I know it sounds crazy It seemed crazy to me before as well When I was originally researching this And studying it many years ago Of course we have to accept That not everyone has the same brains as we do Not everyone thinks the same These narcissists Unlike us They cannot enjoy other people's happiness It's not like how it is for us Like when I'm with someone I'm typically in a good mood Most days I'm happy I'm joyful I've got tons of energy And yes of course I have this desire inside of me To make other people feel the same way And sometimes I'm successful in doing that But then if I'm dealing with a narcissist I don't know you would have experienced this as well It's like the more you try The more you're pushing them away The more angry and frustrated they become Because they just can't feel what you feel No matter what you do With them or to them I mean you may have noticed Even if you're affectionate You're giving them a hug A kiss, whatever it is It just frustrates them even more They pull away They turn away It's like they just don't even want to be involved Because they already know Yes that's going to feel good for you As an empath you want to give Your love, your affection But with them and the receiving end They can't be vulnerable They can't be intimate And they don't want to give you the satisfaction Because then they're just going to envy And hate you even more And this is just How it's going to be with narcissists And they know it's really sad It's like you're trying to treat them Like a normal person You're thinking in your head What's going to make them happy right now But it just doesn't work with them That's not going to do it And in fact it may even make them worse What the narcissist really wants Is for you to desire them For you to long and yearn for them But they don't want to give you the satisfaction Because they can't experience that And to see you getting it It just makes them envy you It just makes them want to destroy it Kill it, stamp it out Because it's just reminding them That they can't be happy That they can't experience the feelings That you do It's so easy for us We can be happy anytime we want But what we have to do is Just get away from them But for them It's like they have to be around you And then they have to keep you down They have to elevate themselves At your expense They have to hurt you Make you feel insignificant That's their idea of happiness That's what makes them feel good That's their idea of fun Keeping a person down Abusing them Making them feel like they're nothing So that they can feel like they're something It can't be the two of you Shining together, no way It's never going to work out like that with them You can't just both be happy together I've lifted A perfect world, yeah That would be great Then you could love each other Be together Have a happy ending Everything's fine Everything's good Everything's happy with a narcissist They're going to hate and envy your happiness And you're not even doing anything wrong You're trying to make them happy But they're going to take it as an attack And that's the only way they're ever going to see it You're trying to love them To them You're just reminding them Again why they cannot be happy And that's all it's ever going to do Anytime that they see you smiling Laughing You've got a cheeky little grin on your face Yeah they see you They see you're having a good time They have cognitive empathy They can read into it They know what's going on with you They can see when you're full of energy You're full of life They can see all of that But they don't have the effect of empathy So they can't share Your Experience They can't feel that same happiness As you do That's why they hold back on affection I don't know about you But I've experienced it before I've never experienced it with sex I mean every narcissist that was with They went to it two, three times a day They tend to use sex For narcissistic supply For validation But whenever it came down to anything More passionate or romantic Maybe I tried to give them a hug Tried to kiss them I'd look at them and it's like They were disgusted Like I was doing something wrong They would pull away And at the time I didn't really understand What was going on But now I look back and I can see It's because they can't be vulnerable They can't be intimate Because to be able to do that You need to have the effect of empathy Where you can share Another person's feelings and experience And it just winds them up Because they already know If they let you hug them Or kiss them That might feel good for you But it's not going to feel good for them They're not going to be able to partake And enjoy that experience Because they're going to see you You're feeling warm inside Comforted Safe and secure And they're going to envy you for that It's going to irritate them It's going to wind them up That's why they pull away But then when it comes to having sex Yeah many times they'll be all in for that Because then they can get their validation Their narcissistic supply And just because they're having sex They have to be vulnerable or intimate And I remember my sexual experiences With narcissists They felt so cold and empty It's like having sex with a robot A doll Not like one of those sex dolls Just a lifeless person And they're just not feeling it The way that you are They love the act of being desired They love the destination The orgasm They're interested in the journey though They don't care about the steps along the way This is why many people say Narcissists don't tend to value foreplay They don't really care too much for that Everything's just so robotic It's all about the destination The end goal What's happening at the end Because they just can't experience it Like you do They can't be vulnerable They can't be intimate And they envy you Because you can That's why you may find that Anything that you enjoy I'm sure many of you have experienced this as well Maybe you like Watching movies Reading books Even Talking to your friends on the phone Wherever it may be Whatever it is that brings you joy It brings you happiness You're having to hide that away from them It's like you have to wait for them to go out the house Just so you can pull out a book Watch a movie Talk to your friends on the phone They just want you to be all alone Just in your room on your own Talking to no one Doing nothing unless it's to serve them Because anything that brings you happiness Or fulfillment They can't share that with you And they envy you because of that When a happy person They're going to want you to be happy as well I know myself I can't stand it Being around unhappy people I mean fair enough if there's a reason Like when I'm dealing with my clients Talking to them on the phone Of course yeah I understand they've been through abuse Difficult relationships It's my job I've got to be there To comfort them to make them happy But with narcissists you cannot do that No matter what you do They will never be happy with you They're not going to give you the satisfaction Of knowing that you've made them happy And in fact they're going to put you on this hamster wheel Where you are effortlessly And endlessly trying to please them And in fact they're going to put you on this hamster wheel And endlessly trying to please them But you're getting nowhere They're never going to let you get anywhere with that Because they want to keep you thinking That something is wrong with you And they already know once you know That you've satisfied them You're going to be feeling good about yourself And they do not want to see that Because then they're going to envy you They can't share your happiness If this message is helpful to you Please do give it a thumbs up down below Very important It helps the YouTube algorithm I could see we have 72 live viewers But only 36 thumbs ups So it's very important Please hit that thumbs up button down below It will help to get this message out there Of course I'm sure there's a lot of people Who just don't understand Why the narcissist hates their happiness But this is it So it's very important that other people see this Let me know your experiences Any experiences you've had with the narcissist Where you were happy And it's like they just had to shut you down They had to find a way to trigger you And make you miserable So that they could elevate themselves at your expense Let me know about your experiences down below Faith says I am a healing Glad to hear that Faith And that's another thing as well They will try to stunt your healing They don't want to see you healed and happy Because they see that as a threat to their control They want to keep you down Infinite Divinity says Beg to come back She refused, was laughing at me on the phone And going about her life I slept in living room Not knowing who has my keys Yeah that's a typical thing that narcissists will do They want to leave you begging, longing and yearning for them Because many of us were looking at it like If this was the other way around I would be feeling pretty bad right now I would be running in To save them, to help them To make them happy Narcissists aren't thinking that way though We have very different Brains They lack that effect of empathy So they cannot share your feelings, your pain And in fact when they see you hurt and in distress That brings them pleasure To know that you're down RT3 says suffering since 22 years I'm so sorry to hear that I do hope that this video is helping to alleviate your pain Nancy Chevelle the witch Yes they want you to beg That's always a typical thing with narcissists We have to remember that Their emotional needs Were never met in their childhood So they're endlessly Seeking excessive amounts of attention and validation To compensate for that Because they can't regulate their emotions from within So yes of course they want you to get on your knees And beg them They want you to be endlessly longing and yearning for them They're never going to give you what you're expecting What they've led you to Once and desire for from them Because remember they lack that effect of empathy So they do not want to see you happy They cannot share your happiness And in fact they envy it They want to destroy it They want to see you completely broken down Then that makes them feel better It distracts them That's their idea of happiness To see you down Thank you lady Rhee I'm glad you love the channel Yeah this is it This is how it goes It's a typical thing with narcissists This is just what we have to look forward to with them It's what we should learn to expect It's their idea of fun The closest thing they'll ever get To experiencing happiness Keeping you down and making you miserable And honestly they're so delusional at times As long as they think they're getting to you As long as they think they're making you miserable And you can watch what they're doing And you can play along Pretend like it's getting to you It's like suddenly out of nowhere They just seem so happy As long as they think it's having an effect But what I want for you Is to find happiness in yourself Maybe other people that you trust as well Don't expect that from a narcissist Because you are not going to get it Not from them Maybe from someone else But not from them They do not want to see you happy But they're not there Whenever you're away from them You can engage in whatever Brings you joy Whether it is watching a movie Reading a book Just make sure they don't find out about it Because they will hate you for it They do not want to see you Partaking and enjoying in anything outside of their control And experiencing things that they can't Of course if they could be happy They could enjoy things the way that you do Maybe then there would be no problem Maybe then they would be okay with you But this is the root cause of it I mean of course there's no such thing as a happy Joyful person who doesn't want to see other people happy And doesn't want to be the source of their happiness And doesn't want people to share their happiness with them That's impossible This is what miserable people do People who are not happy And that is why they do this to you Because they don't want to see you experiencing things that they can't They don't want to see you uplifted Having positive emotions That's just going to make them even more miserable As it reminds them that they cannot experience that So that's the message for today If you found this video helpful Please give it a thumbs up down below Very important as it does help the YouTube algorithm And it will get this message out there So that it can help other survivors as well Also let me know your thoughts in the comment section down below I am reading your comments every day Very important as well Hit that subscribe button And click the bell icon So that you will receive notifications For my future videos when they are uploaded And if you would like to book a one-on-one coaching session with me You can do that on my website It is Narcseviver.co.uk And also follow me on Instagram It is Narcseviver YouTube I have new pictures and videos of my travels every day on there Again thank you all for joining me And as always I look forward to talking with you In another video very soon