 垁                                                                                                                                                                                                engagements of schools  fuego of the fittest. to the other end of the spectrum parents are also being blamed for not paying much attention to their children's development process thereby unleashing both abusers and the victim in an unchecked and unforgiving system. However these These occurrences are avoidable only if some school authorities and parents can form a synergy to put this anomaly in check to prevent future fatalities through the following. The parents-teacher association is an essential part of the learning process of a child so it must not be eliminated. Unusual behaviors from students or pupils must be duly reported and addressed. Boding school facilities must be structured with an intent to curb bullying and unacceptable behaviors. There must be school disciplinary and correctional committee for bullies and victims. Parents should not be negligent to their children or world. If these steps are put in place, the school system will be less of a torture zone and more of a learning and development environment. Let's ponder on these ways by category, a world class, auto and chief. Bullying is killing our kids. Being different is killing our kids and the kids who are bullying are dying inside. We have to save our kids whether they are bullied or they are bullying. They are all in pain. Let us save our children from the menace of bullying, rest in peace with the aronomy and other victims of this evil. Sounds nice when you say that both children are in pain. Unfortunately only one set of children are dying, more often than not. I understand the empathy and the understanding for the child that is bullying the perpetrator. Because most times, like we have said, the environment has 90% to do with the child's development of formation, character of formation. I understand that. However, I also understand that more often than not, while that child has issues, the child has been bullied and gets the wrong head of the stick more often than not. Sometimes a bigger bully because they need to fight back, sometimes a child that turns up timid for the rest of their lives. Or dead. Or dead in some cases. Well, there is a case of the girl in the US, 12-year-old with autism who committed suicide as a result of ongoing bullying. She was being bullied so bad that she took her own life at the age of 12. What about the one that happens on months back in South Africa? Is student killed or safe because of bullying too? I don't know that you follow the news. That was on months back in South Africa. I kind of think that, I mean, yes, I might try to take a slight outlier position. It's really to lose stance as to yes, the bully, the bullied actually suffers some more. And yes, maybe apparently and obviously the bullied may suffer some more. But then we do need to understand something that in reality, when you start to delve deeper into behavioral patterns and working with children, every action has their psychological undertones to this. So see a person who is bullied, I'm not saying that, I'm not justifying because truly, I was not exactly a bully. Are you sure? I mean, I mean. Are you sure? Are you sure you look like a bully? I'm not sure. No, I was just one of those very interesting double personalities. So I was assertive, yet I was also very timid. So I'm timid and I stay in my space. But you push at me, I kind of assert myself. So I feel that we need to realize and deeply focus on the fact that there's a valid set of points that Elijah is raising. The bullied and the bullied. But that brings me to something that somebody said when this conversation was going on. And that in a lot of schools, most schools have just, if you look at it like one counselor. In fact, the guidance and counseling system in school is almost moribund. Most schools look at, you know, intentionality is the last leg of this conversation in fact. Most schools focus on teacher certification, education, the principal and things like that. But let's look at a step, take it as one step back when he was talking and we're talking. I remember that a lot of our parents or at least two generations and the immediate past generation had parents who, whether or not we look at parenting, we're talking about parenting, parenting intentional, parenting is really important. But a lot of people that seem to have turned out okay in terms of their built in life. When the school was really like, you know, when you had people who were in the system and they were so okay, you know what this person is being said to school and this was going on. So I feel that in this case when Elijah was talking about how do you correct a failed system. The system is failed, right? That we're talking about the educational system. And in this situation here, little things like when he spoke about it, what kind of the undergirding of it, that was those issues. It's a behavior. What is the cause of that behavior? We have to deal with it. So we have someone here called Helen, who is an advocate. Helen. And there's something that happens. There's applied behavioral analysis in the special needs. You know, when we're thinking about special needs and you are working on behaviors of children and you try and find the cause of the root behavior, ABA, ABC. You know what happened before that behavior. So you immediately are looking for the root cause, the behavior that happened and then the consequence of that behavior. Now we're dealing with the consequences of all these things and we haven't dealt with the antecedent. What is the root cause? So I think Helen is a really good one. Let's get her opinion on this. Well, I guess now I'm talking from the point of a behavior analyst. So yes, you have the antecedents. You have the behavior. You have the consequence. We are dealing with the consequence. That's what we seem to be doing here. But we need to look at what happened before. But as you guys, as Elijah was talking, I said to myself, we have so many social workers who are redundant. Yes. We have so many counselors who are redundant. Why can't we have a system that every school must have one social worker and one guiding and counselor. And it will be done according to the population of the school. So if your school is, you have 1,000 children in your school, you would have at least two or three to service these children. This is what I feel should be the immediate stop gap. Because it's going to take a while for us to get going. But as you rightfully said, those disciplines are totally non-existent in most of the schools. Why can't we advocate for them to come back? Absolutely. Well, I'm going to tell you one, Helen. Those that think they are guiding and counselors needed to be guided and counseled. Those that teach needed to be taught. When I was in secondary school, I told you I went to military school. That's why we had the soldiers to instate discipline in us and sometimes punish us via the normal military means even lock you up in a room if need be. We had guided and counseled. Most of the G&C were mostly women, matured women. When I mean matured, I'm not talking of young teachers. I mean women in their 50s. When you meet their mommies, they will sit down with you like my son or my daughter, they will advise you. Now when I got to, when I was in GS3, having passed through some nasty nonsense in school, when I got to SS1, SS2, and eventually I became a prefect, I remember I had a meeting with other prefects like myself. We said that this hour the gym will be different. We are not going to punish junior students. GS1 to GS3, we feel they are too small. We don't punish them. If you do wrong from SS1 to SS2, you will be punished. So that idea of asking, hey, you come and sweep our class. We don't do that. In fact, if any of our class does that, we disappear. They don't like us for that. But others said before us did it. Why is your own case different? To say no, us will be different. We like discipline, but not to beat or punish innocent children. That's what I was thinking. I understand that, because sometimes again, unless you can empathize with what someone is going through, no matter how many degrees or certifications you have, sometimes it's just education. Sometimes it's just empathy. Being able to understand what this person has been through. I mean, for a long time I was bullied. For natural reasons. I have four older brothers. I was bullied all my life, more or less. But not to, it's the hopeful thesis. But they knew, well, not like all my life. I'm still bullied by my older brothers. Because they are mean. They are way older than me. You get those things, they still bully you. But what it does for you, sometimes it toughens you up. But in some other cases, the negative consequences of that, and you have to now personally check yourself and see the tendencies that you have. And then, like you said, go to the root cause and say where did this thing come from and then start to address those things. Well, thank you very much everyone. The question of the child rights plagues a lot of Nigerians. And it breaks it down after the break.