 This is awesome. If you guys haven't had a chance to stand up here, you should just come take a look out in the audience. This is pretty cool. I have absolutely zero option but to be here right now. In 1974 at Clark Air Base in the Philippines, then technical sergeant Jim and Captain Judy Rohn birthed me and from that point forward I believe I've served in the military at some point from the day that I was in the crib. I was lucky enough for my parents to be my heroes. My dad in particular came from nothing, essentially didn't finish high school, barely finished high school, grew up in the streets of Philadelphia, had a big family, was involved in the gangs and were not talking crips and bloods and all the wannabe tough folks today but the blacks versus the Italians and their job was to essentially beat each other up. Dad took himself from there, climbed to the top of the food chain in the United States Air Force, did it by building his own work ethic, did it by pulling himself up from his bootstraps and expected us to do the same. My father was fond of saying as we went and did things around the house or around town that you are borrowing my last name, you haven't done anything to earn it yet, so go get it. That mentality, the idea that serving other people was more important than doing something for ourselves was instilled in us and continues to be what drives us today. I say us as my family. We grew up playing team sports. We always had to play a sport. My parents would have preferred team sports because what it showed was that what we did was more important for other people than for benefiting ourselves. I grew up in South Texas and if anybody has grown up in Texas you realize that if you're physically able, then the sport of choice is high school football. Football was great for the friends next to you on the field, for the friends next to you in the locker room, for the full stadium on Friday nights. That is what we were all told that we played for. I played for a different reason sometimes or most of the time and that was for the headlines. That was for the newspapers. That was for the newsreel. But it wasn't for myself. What I remember distinctly is Dad having to get out of the stadium and rush home to get to the 1030 news that had the high school football highlights on there. Or Saturday morning when I hear Dad up I would run down the stairs and see him scurrying to get to one of the two newspapers that at the time were in San Antonio. One was the San Antonio Express News. The other was the San Antonio Light. So he could look through the sports section, find what they called the Friday night heroes or the high school highlights to see if he could find the last name Roan in there. There were times that I could peek around the banister in the stairwell and just out of the corner see a little smirk on his face and a little smile. That pride is what I played for. That pride in watching him be happy with what we did is what motivated me. There were two times that I saw my father tear up that I can remember. The first was at his retirement speech after 31 years in the military. The second one was in May of 2011 when I took the guide on for squadron command at Eglin Air Force Base in the 728th Air Control Squadron. As you walk down because you have to do the obligatory gifts to your family and I handed data coin from the squadron, the words he said were this is the proudest day of my life. Dad is now 85 and has severe Alzheimer's. For those of you who have experienced that or witnessed that, it's a cruel disease. For my dad in particular though, one of the things that is amazing is that he's always happy in the moment. He doesn't remember the moments but he's happy in the moment. My daughters at 2017 bought him a little fedora hat for his 85th birthday. He puts the hat on and he's very excited. Hey, where'd this come from? Well dad, that's from Riley and Rihanna. They gave that to you for your birthday and he loves it. So about 15 seconds later, he takes the hat off and puts it back in his lap. He looks down. You know what he says? Where'd this come from? Where'd this come from? What's this hat? Hey dad, that's awesome. Puts the hat on and I had a picture up here. I'll show that to you later if you come to the lab. But he puts the hat back on and this time when he puts the hat on, he breaks out what he thinks is a brand new dance. He's like, watch this, I made this thing up. It's brand new, it's called a mashed potato. So if you've ever seen an 85 year old black male with a fedora hat trying to do a mashed potato, thinking that he's got something new, then it's pretty entertaining. But the point is, is that he is happy in the moment. That is a little bit about who I am. That's a little bit of my story. It's a little bit about why. It's a little about how I do things and the mentality that I use to take things forward. Last summer, I was listening to a podcast from a guy named Simon Sinek who has the golden circle start with why. Anybody familiar? So in 2006, Simon Sinek was called to the Pentagon to talk to the military leadership about this concept of the golden circle. What stuck out to me was that this was 2006. So 13 or 14 years ago, and while start with why is significant and has its place and filled a gap in understanding purpose. I believe we have a different gap right now when it comes to leadership and leadership connection and that gap is understanding who somebody is. As an older guy, we'll call it more mature in the Air Force, we have conversations with our friends and they say, I let younger crowd, they don't get it. When I get to go out and talk to folks that are in the younger crowd, you know what they say about the older folks? They don't get it, absolutely. So there is a significant gap in connection. Leadership is the single most important factor for organizational success. In order to be a solid leader and effective leader, you have to be connected to those you lead. Those you lead have to be connected to you as a leader. The way to do that is to understand each other's who. Understand what drives people. In an effort to bridge that gap as I've been talking on the road, we come up with who being greater than why, it's also greater than how, it's also greater than what, it's also greater than where. I'm a history major so I put together this little basic formula that works linearly and it's about the extent of my math knowledge. But some way that's, a way that's more practical to use this is what I call the leadership as a domain loop or the lad loop. If you start with who, understanding somebody's story, understanding what drives them, you begin to drive a connection. It takes time, it takes persistence, but you begin to open that door. Understanding somebody's who allows you to understand their why. You understand their purpose, you understand what drives them, you understand their existence. You also understand how they learn, how they're motivated, how to inspire them. You learn this through the stories. Additionally, you figure out their where. Where they wanna go. Where they consider themselves headed. We call these, we call them the North Star and the Near Star. The North Star is where they wanna go, that's their objective, that's the end goal, sometimes it's a stretch goal. And then they have the Near Stars. The Near Stars are the intermediate objectives, the things that somebody has to step on and to achieve in order to make it to their North Star. And then lastly, you understand their what. What do they need to do to get there to achieve their where? What steps do they have to take and most importantly, what steps do they have to take first? How can you as a leader get them to where they need to get, get them to where they want to be and to get them to where they need to be to help your organization succeed and what support that you need to provide to them. After you figure that out, it goes back into the who. The things that you do throughout the rest of that loop could influence, cause change, cause a modification in behavior. What you're hoping for is that's a more effective individual, a more effective team and more effective team member and a more effective connection. That connection that's based on trust, the connection that's based on understanding each other and the connection that is safe. As with any loop, that circle as you saw didn't have very many entry points. So one of the things that we talk about are four questions for connection. It could be anything, this construct, I believe gets your wedge in the door. It's not the end all be all. It is how you get yourself into the loop. It's a point of injection into that lad loop. The first question that you ask as an individual or that you as a leader, show the people that are following you, your subordinates, is my purpose is, if you remember back on the first slide, what I have up there is my purpose is to enthusiastically unlock leadership potential. That's why I do what I do. That's why I love coming out and talking and this goes back to my parents which have put into us a culture and the idea that we have to serve something greater than ourselves. The second one is I need help getting better at. I'm willing to bet that nobody in here enjoys sharing their weaknesses. Nobody in here enjoys sharing their vulnerabilities. Nobody in here enjoys necessarily getting in front of a group of people you don't know talking about a father who was 85 years old with Alzheimer's and almost took it up in front of the crowd. In order to truly make a connection, you have to be comfortable being uncomfortable. If a leader is asking you as a follower these questions and is not themselves comfortable being uncomfortable, is not themselves ready to share these things, then it's very difficult to trust as a follower. The next one is I can help others do this. Now this isn't beating your chest, isn't being arrogant. This is sharing lessons, sharing successes. If you've done something well, then why not share that? I had a former boss who used to say that a best practice should only be a best practice for about five minutes because after that you're sharing that with everybody else and everybody else knows about it. As part of an organization, as part of a team, using your strengths to help your brothers and your sisters is gonna endear you to them. It's also gonna move that team forward. It's also gonna help your leaders understand what successes they can lean on you to forward to other people. Next is this year will be a success if. Now you can change year to anything you want. This deployment, this meeting, the time sitting here in SOS, the time sitting at Air Command and Staff College and assignment, this will be successful if. For my example and the company that we run we are successful if we can reach one person and influence them every day on how to be a better leader and that individual can in turn touch one person and make them better. That is our definition of success. Somebody earlier mentioned expectations. Until you understand what right looks like, until you understand what it is you need to do and what you're measured against, it is near impossible to effectively lead somebody or effectively be part of a team. I'll emphasize again, if you're a leader and you're asking somebody these questions and you have yourself have not taken the opportunity to share those from your perspective as a leader to that subordinate, it is going to be difficult for them to trust. It's gonna be difficult for them to embrace it and it's gonna be difficult for them to share the story. Has anybody ever walked down the hallway in a new organization or even an old organization and your boss asks you, how are you doing today? What's the answer? Good, why is that? Good, outstanding, because it's good. Even if it's bad, it's good. We don't trust people. We don't know them. We're not comfortable sharing our vulnerabilities with them. Gallop did a poll and asked, why do people not like their bosses? And the answer was simple. They don't like their bosses because they don't know their bosses and their bosses don't know them. The irony is that if you don't know somebody, how can you not like them? But that's a whole different discussion. The point is that once people get to know you as their leader, once leaders get to know and understand who it is you are as a team member, the trust is built, the psychological safety is instilled, and you are more effective as a leader and you're more effective as a team. This is not easy. There are no shortcuts. There are no life hacks to leadership, to building a team. If you look up leadership on Google or whatever search engine you use, you will find nearly a million hits in about .37682 seconds. There are different ideas. There are different ways. There are different thoughts. I don't believe I've ever found one that says go do this tomorrow and it's going to work. We are rushing. We are in a society that's rushing. We are trying to get things done very quickly. This takes time. It takes repetition to get good at it. It takes repetition to get comfortable with it. Knowing who you are, knowing people's stories are going to eventually become habitual in the way that you engage with your team and the way that your team engages with you. In the military specifically, we were so focused on facts over feelings. Give me the facts, give me the checklist. Here's what the Air Force Instruction or the regulation says. The challenge and the thing that we have to change is realizing that when it comes to building a relationship, when it comes to building a trusting connection that is going to inspire, that's going to motivate, and that's going to make you a better performer, a better team member, that feelings are more important than the facts. This is a blast. This is an opportunity that I never thought I'd ever have being able to stand here and talk to a bunch of leaders that are in training. Leaders are going to walk out tomorrow and lead. I look forward to diving into this a little more with you this afternoon in the lab. Never stop earning it, never stop trying to build a connection. Once that connection is built, once the trust is built, once people feel safe, there's absolutely zero ways that you can not be successful as a leader. Thank you for your time. Lead them well.