 Pause for a minute Do you know what your first impression is a lot of us don't a lot of us now and I know for me When I started to get that feedback on it. I was flabbergasted. I was frustrated Like what do you mean? This is not me. This is not how I want to present to the world And then I fell into well, how do I figure this out? Right? What do I do? How do I mimic the right people? What are the signals and it's it's easy to get caught in this this trap of Okay, well, I got to change everything right usually it's a lot simpler than that It's just subtracting a few things that you're doing to protect yourself to feel more secure in an environment That's uncomfortable that can actually lead you astray well think about what your world view looks like if you hadn't chose Chosen your first impression and let's just save you've given a bad first impression for let's say a few years now And you're wondering why everyone just seems put off or not giving you any time and How quickly then do you now start seeing everyone in that same manner or that the world is very tough and Then have to come the terms with for years It's been on your plate is the reason why everyone has been viewing you in that manner So as you mentioned, it's hard to get out of especially knowing that For years now the reason you've had such a small amount of opportunity is you've been yourself And it could have been easily corrected if you just Thought about it. Yeah, and a lot of us get hung up on the words, right? I want to say the right thing I want to appear funny But if you put a little emphasis and energy and work into that first impression that window that momentum Can carry the day so you don't have to be as funny. You don't have to dig out yourself out of a hole and if you think about this our first impression of the people around us Stays with us. So that first impression you had of your friend Typically was a good one which allowed you to feel comfortable pursuing that relationship So how many people in your life have you written off based on as dr. Todorov would said Your fallacies right your own beliefs about people and what what's so interesting about his research is that Our judgments of first impressions relate to our environment meaning the facial expressions You're exposed to become your baseline and when people deviate from your baseline, then you make judgments negatively So for example, if your father growing up Had a furrowed brow when he was deep in thought Then you Would by the absorbing that environment and picking up that first impression of people You would view people with furrowed brows more positively than someone who had a sunny disposition in his parents And didn't see that anger come through So what alex is saying here is don't focus on writing people off based on your first impression It's a snapshot. That's usually wrong And that's the myth that we're trying to bust here of Focusing on reading other people's body language and trying to understand their first impressions That's not where we should be putting our focus. Yes, we need to look at ourselves and make sure that we're projecting the right things