 In this video, I'm going to be talking about if narcissists know that they are narcissists. Please like, comment, share and subscribe. Click the bell icon to receive notifications of my future videos. If you would like to donate, my PayPal link is in the video description. If you are interested in one-on-one coaching, you can email me at narcsfevercoaching.com. Check out the new merchandise in the Narcsfever store. We have new designs in our t-shirts, tank tops and mugs. The link to the Narcsfever store is in the video description. Do narcissists know that they are narcissists? When the narcissist feels fear or pain, they are reacting from their ego. They are reacting from the part of the mind that mediates between the conscious and the unconscious and is responsible for reality testing and a sense of personal identity. For anyone, the ego is our primary defense against fear or pain, at least until we are able to dissolve the ego and behave on a more conscious level. However, due to the narcissist's stunted emotional development, they are not capable of dissolving their ego. Defendism is a coping mechanism and a defense mechanism. The narcissist's programming is designed to defend them and it is designed for emotional survival. When they feel insecurity, their programming is designed for them to survive emotionally. For them to do this, they have to avoid any accountability. Their programming is forced to distort their perceptions for them to be capable of doing this. If the narcissist does something wrong, they will deny any responsibility and then shift the blame onto someone else. If they are criticised and made to believe something about themselves, they will project this onto someone else. Their programming is designed to do this and they are not fully conscious or fully aware of this process. In the narcissist's mind, you have done something undesirable or unfavourable to them. In their minds, they believe that they are the victims and they are just doing what is necessary to defend themselves. When you try to blame them for what they have done, it triggers them to reflect on their shame and their disorder is programmed for emotional survival. This will produce a narcissist's gingery within the narcissist, where they will then shift the blame onto you. It will produce anger or rage from the narcissist and they will feel as though you are attacking them. They have to justify their actions to dodge their shame and regulate their emotional state. This is part of their programming and they don't have much choice or control over this. They are slaves to their programming. They know what they are doing and they know that what they are doing is wrong. This is why they try to hide what they are doing. If they believe that what they are doing is acceptable, there would be no reason to hide anything. They know that they are hurting you. They know that cheating, lying and stealing is wrong. They know that it is wrong to manipulate people, but they only believe that these things are wrong because society says it's wrong. They know and understand that their behavior is socially unacceptable. But in their minds, they believe it is OK for them to do what they do. They believe that their actions are justified. They might believe that it is wrong for someone else to do what they are doing, especially if it was done to them. But in their minds, they are the exception. They are excluded from the general statement or rule, not because society says that they are excluded, but simply because they believe it in their minds. They do not feel bad about anything that they do because in their minds they believe it is justified and they have the right to do it. They also believe that they are the victims and they are doing what is necessary to defend themselves. Do narcissists know that they are narcissists? Yes and no. They have been acting and behaving in this way for such a long period of time that some of their behaviors have become ingrained in the neural pathways of their brains. They have become habitual behaviors. When they are engaged in dysfunctional behavior, they don't really think much about it. It has become characteristic or instinctive. It is done without conscious thought. When the narcissist is trying to manipulate you, they know exactly what they are doing. When they are stalking you or trying to secure you as a source of supply, they are fully aware of their actions. This is something that they have perfected over a long period of time. They know the effects that they are having on you and they know that they are misleading you, but they don't care. All they care about is what they want in that moment, which is narcissistic supply. The narcissist doesn't understand why qualities such as having a conscience, empathy and respect should be so important, valuable or meaningful. These qualities have no significance to the narcissist unless you are displaying those qualities to them. But they cannot understand the significance or the meaning of seeing someone else as being worthy enough for them to honor, respect or consider. They do not have the mental capacity or the emotional capacity to see people in this way, or to care about them enough to not behave in the way that they do. They have to think in this way in order to survive. They have to feed off other people or else they would self-destruct. Whether they are aware of their behavior or not isn't the important question. You need to ask yourself why are you involved with someone who doesn't give you the respect that you deserve? Why are you involved with someone who could not return anything that you have invested in them? The narcissist will never experience love, joy or peace. But you are capable of experiencing those emotions. You deserve someone to share those emotions with, someone who will add value to your life, someone who will appreciate you and recognize your worth, someone who is capable of giving you the love and respect that you deserve. Thank you for watching. I hope this video resonated with you. Please like, comment, share and subscribe. Click the bell icon to receive notifications for my future videos. If you would like to donate, my PayPal links in the video description. For coaching enquiries, you can email me at narxfevicochin at gmail.com. Check out the new merchandise in the Narx Feather store where you can purchase your own Narx Feather teacher, tank top or mug. The link is in the video description. Thank you for watching and I'll talk to you soon.