 Today's quick tip is about holding it together in those really challenging moments so those moments when your child is losing their sh1t and you feel that the same might happen to you. Now remember their anger, their anxiety is catching but so too can your calm be so we need to make our calm catching which means in those challenging moments we've got somehow keep it cool keep it calm lower the emotional energy in the situation how do we do that? My very very simplest best tip for this is just take a breath and I will sometimes turn away maybe close my eyes look inwards just try and close out the whole situation for a moment just literally take the deepest breath feel my feet in the floor really breathe in deeply think about that breath as a cleansing breath and remind myself I've only got to make it through the next minute can I do that calmly can I put the mask on can I hold it together and be the calm kind caring supportive adult that my child needs right now. This is Alfie. He thinks taking a deep breath is a good idea too so just literally take a breath turn away remind yourself that you can do this maybe imagine a mentor by your side maybe I'm there with you just step outside the moment look inside close your eyes take a big deep breath much like if you're about to step onto stage and you're a very anxious person about being on stage you might ground yourself just as you're about to walk up there you might feel your feet on the ground take that big deep breath and say to yourself I can do this just the same in these day-to-day situations you don't have to hold it together and definitely just need to pull it together take that breath hold it together just for a minute or two and when we can do that when we can find it within ourselves to just make it through the next minute or two calmly collected being safe supported adult that our children need and generally those minutes those moments do pass more quickly and less eventfully too. Total caveat here this is so much easier said than done and you won't get it right every time and there will be moments when their anger their anxiety is catching and you catch it and it all goes to porridge that's okay it happens to all of us but just remember as you feel those moments escalating while you've still got hold of the end of the rope turn around look inside take a breath and reinsert yourself to the situation and see if you can hold it together. Hope it's helpful it's when I use all the time when I can when I don't lose it because we all do sometimes. We'd love to know what you do in these situations how do you hold it together how do you keep your call in those challenging circumstances share your comments below and remember that when you share your ideas on this stuff you help everyone else to realize that none of us are in this alone and sometimes your ideas are super super helpful to other people too. If you're finding my content helpful at the moment please do go over to Patreon and consider subscribing and following there this is the thing that's going to enable me to focus more on creating content for you and people like you to help you to help the children in your care. Till next time bye!