 Even if you're not the one experiencing it, depression isn't easy for anybody. Being in a relationship with someone who suffers from depression will challenge you both individually and as a couple, but this doesn't mean that a healthy relationship is impossible. Take it from me, someone who suffers from depression and has been in a relationship with someone who also has depression. Like any relationship, it will take some time, effort and compromise to find a balance between self-care and quality time. Supporting each other through challenging times can strengthen your relationship in ways you haven't experienced before. Here are seven things that your girlfriend with depression, that's me, wishes you knew. One, you're not responsible for my feelings. As much as you want to, you can't wave a magic wand and make me happy. Depression can be a lot more complex than being sad or grieving. It can be caused by a chemical imbalance for an issue in the brain, which I do not expect you to treat without a medical degree. I love your encouragement and comfort. Please don't stop. And don't be discouraged if my symptoms don't disappear despite your best efforts. Even though this is my battle, I still need you by my side. Two, let me help you help me. I've cared for a mentally ill partner in the past, so I know how difficult it can be to maintain the balance of a healthy relationship. On the one hand, I want to help them or at least take the pain, but it didn't take long before that took a toll on my own mental health. I didn't know how to handle both the stressors in my own life and the trauma my partner was experiencing, so I encourage you to talk to me if you ever feel the same. Sometimes a conversation is all you need to get a better understanding of your partner's needs and expectations, as well as your own. Three, sometimes I'll choose not to do something. My priorities might be different than yours. For example, I may choose not to attend an event I've been looking forward to because I'm feeling overwhelmed or burnt out. While I may be depriving myself of fun, I'm choosing to spend the little energy I do have on the things I need to do, such as self care and rest instead of the things I want to do. It's like spending a night in because you're tired. I just get tired from things that may not tire you. Four, depression is not simply sadness. Sadness isn't a medical diagnosis. When one thinks of depression, they often think of lethargy and sadness, but not many people are aware that anxious behaviors can be symptoms of depression too. It can be difficult to predict what depression will look like because it's different for everyone. The Anxiety and Depression Association of America confirms that there are many physical symptoms of depression as well, such as headaches, digestive disorders, and pain for which no other cause can be diagnosed. Five, I might be forgetful. Forgive me. Depression can slow my thoughts as much as it can slow down my body. My memory can have issues. Every now and then, I'll stumble across a photo of a memory I can't recall. Other times I can't remember the correct order of events. Unfortunately, my short-term memory is just as finicky. It's not uncommon that I'll forget the second half of my sentence before I've spoken the first, and my name recollection game is weak. It's frustrating as it's my reality, so I'm learning how to work with what I've got. Please be patient. Six, decisions can be difficult. When you're numb or in a daze, you don't have the wherewithal to make decisions, and neither do I. The difference is that my numbness, misery, and exhaustion are constant. So if I take some time to make up my mind, I appreciate your patience and understanding. Even little decisions might feel catastrophic, so it helps when those around me are calm and open-minded. I know this can be frustrating for you, and I assure you that I'm not trying to make things difficult. This is frustrating for the both of us. And seven, even a little support means a huge amount to me. I don't expect you to drop everything else and save me, but I probably need some support. I know that you are your own person with your own responsibilities, which are equally as important as my and our to me. I won't get angry that you need to take care of yourself instead of me, as long as there's an equal effort and open communication. I need to understand you too. All I ask for my partner is authenticity and support. Whether that be in the form of a phone call, a long hug, or an uplifting meme. Do you have a partner with depression? Or are you the one suffering from it? Do you relate to any of the things explained in this video? Let us know in the comments below. Don't forget to share this video with those who can benefit from it. Like and subscribe to Psych2Go for more helpful psychology content. As always, thanks for watching, and I'll see you next time.