 Ask yourself this question is what I'm doing right now, getting me closer to or further from my goals. Right now, in this very moment, what are you doing? I love that you're listening to this podcast, but you got to get off your ass at some point and start taking action. Today, we're going to be talking about five keys to have more confidence. So let's not mess around, let's just dive in. The first key to have more confidence is to change the way that you talk to yourself. I was reading a book last week and there was something that I saw that was like, oh my God, I need to get my pen and underline this. And the phrase that was said is that nobody has ever abused you more in your entire life than you've abused yourself. And so I'm going to ask you guys this question. And we've been through some, you've probably been through some stuff for your life. Some of you guys have been through some stuff, some of you guys have been through a lot of stuff. But that thing that happened to you, those things that happened to you, happened, they were an event that happened. But when we talk about abusing ourselves, how often do we abuse ourselves over and over and over and over again? We can think about how we screwed up an event that was five years ago and we're still abusing ourselves for a mistake that we made five years ago and we're not even the same person we were five years ago. No one has abused you more in your life than you have abused yourself. So think about that. What do you say to yourself? If you've been listening to me for a while, there's one thing that I love to bring up in the way that you talk to yourself. You would never talk to someone that you love the same way that you talk to yourself. Why is that? Why are we so hard on ourselves? If we wanna have more confidence, shouldn't we focus on figuring out a way to be our biggest best friend, to be our biggest cheerleader? There's no way for me to be a confident person but then talk trash to myself all day long. Why? Because I'm going to create the reality of what's going on in my head. If I'm constantly talking down to myself at all points in time, how is it possible for me to walk into a room and be like, I'm the most confident person here? It's impossible. And I understand that this is a habit. The way you talk to yourself is a habit. You can't change it overnight. It's something that you're used to doing. You've heard me say it before. You can't change your first thought but you can always change your second thought. Start becoming more aware of how maybe you do verbally abuse, maybe you don't know how to speak like I don't. Verbally abuse yourself. You can't change it overnight but you can start becoming more aware of it. And when you become aware of it, you can fix it. You can't fix something that you're not aware of. And so if you notice to yourself, okay, I have been a little bit hard on myself for something that I did yesterday. What I want you to do is instead of being hard on yourself and finding all of your flaws because you have a lot of them, we all do. That's what makes us human because nobody is perfect. There's never such thing as perfect. There's no such thing as a perfect anything. Perfect person, perfect circumstance, perfect anything. Everything is imperfect. It's like the ancient, I think it's Japanese. Wabi sabi is the beauty in the imperfection. Can you start to find the beauty in your imperfection? Can you start to go, yeah, you know what? I did mess it up yesterday. But you know what? I'm still pretty awesome. I'm still a great person. I still treat my friends really well. I still have been working on my legs and I got a really great butt. Whatever it is that you've been working on, how can you find out what's good with you versus always searching for the flaws? The first key to changing your self-confidence and have more confidence is to change what you talk to yourself because you're gonna create the reality that you constantly have going on in your head. Second key is to follow through. Follow through and not just follow through on the big things in life. Follow through on the small things, especially follow through on the small things. Why? Because the way you do one thing is the way you do everything. Are you gonna be perfect? Absolutely not. You're not gonna be perfect. You're gonna mess up a lot of stuff. You're not gonna follow through all the time. You're not gonna do everything that you say you're gonna do. But as long as you're doing more than that, like if you're more than 50% in following through, maybe you're at 51%, maybe tomorrow you're at 52 and next week you're at 57, you start getting a little bit more confident in your follow through. You start becoming better and you start getting this feeling of when I say I'm gonna do something, I frickin' do it. What would it look like? What would your life look like? What would your, your reality look like? What would your relationships look like? What would your friendships look like? What would your bank account look like? What would your business look like? What would your family look like? If you were impeccable with your words and you were impeccable with your actions, how would your life change? Because here's the reason why following through is so important. Think about your subconscious. Your subconscious is working at all points in time. It's running in the background at all points in time. Every single time that you don't follow through, that's a little bit of your subconscious going, oh, there's Rob that didn't follow through again. Oh, there's Rob that didn't follow through again. Oh, there's Rob. He said he was gonna do three sets. He decided to give up on himself and do four. Actually, I'm sorry, that's backwards. He decided he said he was gonna do four sets. He decided to give up on himself and do three. Your subconscious is constantly watching you in the background. It knows when you don't follow through. And so if you were to think of your subconscious as the little guy that's in the background, just stacking dominoes. And on the left-hand side, he's got all the times you don't follow through. And on the right-hand side, he's got all the times you do follow through. Which one is he stacking more? Because guess what? If you're stacking more of the not follow through, I guarantee you absolutely 100%, your confidence is gonna be lower. But if you start stacking the follow through and start stacking the follow through and start stacking the follow through, your confidence will raise because your subconscious is going, you know what? I'm starting to notice when Rob says he's gonna do something, he freakin' does it. That's where confidence comes from. Showing up for yourself when no one else is there. Not showing up for other people. Sure, that counts and that matters, but showing up for yourself. Think about your subconscious when you don't follow through and then think about your subconscious when you do follow through. It's like lifting heavier weight. Your subconscious is like, I can do this. I've been doing this before. You want me to do that little thing? Did you see what I did yesterday? Got it, don't worry about it. That's where confidence comes from. Confidence comes from showing up for yourself for following through, from being impeccable with your word and doing what you say you're going to do. Step number two is to follow through. Step number three is to force yourself to get better results. Focus on going just a little bit further than normal. I have the law of 10% I like to call it. Just do 10% more in everything that you do. That's it. If you are a salesperson and you have to do 100 cold calls a day and that's required, do 110. It's only 10 phone calls. I've sat down many, many times and done 100 cold calls in a day. Many, many, many times. So it's possible to do, but once you get to that 100, it's like, all right, I could stop right now or I could do 10 more, right? If you do 10 more a day, Monday through Friday for an entire year, that's 2,600 extra cold calls a year. How much different would your business be? Whatever it is that you sell, whatever it is that you do, if you did 10 extra phone calls, you would have 2,600 extra phone calls over the course of a year. That's 26, if you're doing 100 cold calls a day normally and then you add an extra 10 Monday through Friday for a year, 2,600 extra cold calls, that's like adding 26 days of cold calls into your schedule. How much different would your mindset be? How much different would your bank account be? How much different would your business be if you just did 10 more? It's only 10% more, 100 to 110. If you say you're gonna run one mile, run 1.1 miles, and let's just say Monday through Friday, you decide that you wanna run one mile Monday through Friday and instead you decide to go 10% more and you do 1.1 miles and you do a Monday through Friday for an entire year, that's 26 extra miles a year. How different would your body be if you did 26 more miles this year? And it's not that much, it's not 26 at once, it's not an entire marathon at one time, it's just an extra 10th of a mile. You can do that, just add 10%. Instead of going for 10 reps, add 10% more. 10% of 10 is one, so all you have to do is 11 reps. That's thousands of extra reps per year. How different would your body be if you did thousands of extra reps, maybe tens of thousands of extra reps every single year? Doesn't seem like much, it's only one extra rep, it's 10% more. It won't kill you, but it will change you. That is the value of doing just a little bit better than what you're currently doing, just 10% more. Also it helps your mindset around finishing and going further, instead of stopping just before, instead of stopping in nine reps when you're supposed to go to 10, when you go to 11, you're like, I'm showing up for myself, I'm showing up for myself. And if there's that little guy in your subconscious that's just stacking dominoes, you're fricking side that you're showing up for yourself, those dominoes are gonna get stacked. So that's number three, get better results by going 10% more. Step number four is to push yourself through fear. There's this weird misconception that I find with people, that people who have not been as successful as they want to be in life, think that successful people are fearless. Think that they have no fear. Think that they're just ready to go at all points in time. No, here's the difference, successful people have fear. They feel the fear, they just learn to stop listening to it. A successful person and an unsuccessful person still have pretty close to the same amount of fear. The difference is who listens to it and who doesn't. And the reason why is because I think that the most successful people in the world, most successful athletes in the world, know your fear is showing you the edge of your comfort zone. When you're feeling a physical feeling of fear, it is a physical manifestation of your fear. That is your comfort zone because you're not gonna feel fear in your comfort zone. Now, if you're sitting at your house watching Netflix and you're on Instagram, there's no fear going on there. You're doing something that you've done hundreds and hundreds of times most likely. But when you feel fear, that is a physical manifestation of your comfort zone. That's a beautiful thing. That is your mind, your body, your reality showing you, hey, Rob, you're on the edge of your comfort zone. And so most people, when they feel fear, they start to lean back. They go, oh, this isn't good, this isn't right, I'm not supposed to be doing this, I'm not supposed to be here. Fear shows me I'm in the wrong place. In reality, fear is showing you that you're in the right place and instead of leaning back, you need to lean into fear. Fear is beautiful. Fear, the physical feeling of fear, is the physical manifestation of your comfort zone. It is showing you what you need to push past. It is showing you where you need to go. It is showing you. It is one of the biggest gifts you could possibly get is to find out where your comfort zone is by feeling fear. Feel, fear, and do it anyways, okay? That's step number four. Push through the fear. And step number five is to stack your small wins. If you've been listening to my podcast for a long time, you know I'm a really big fan of the smallest wins you could possibly get. I want you to stack as many wins as you possibly can throughout the day. I'm not talking about closing a $100,000 deal, even though that's amazing, that's great, you'll probably be super excited about it. I'm talking about the little things, because it's the little things that matter, the tiny little wins. You've heard me say it. Try to get as many wins as you can, first thing in the morning. When your alarm clock goes off, wake up. Don't hit the snooze button. When you get out of bed, make that damn thing. When you use a dish, clean it right after it's done. When you're trying on clothes before you're about to go out and party, whatever it is that you do, maybe you're going on a little date, trying to look sexy, instead of leaving all of your clothes on the bed that you tried on to find the perfect outfit, put those clothes away. Might take you two minutes, but it's a small win. It's a small win of going, you know what? I'm showing up for myself. It's a small win of going, you know what? I'm stacking those dominoes. How many small wins can you come up with throughout the entire day? Think about that. Next time you're going through your day, today, when you get off, stop listening to this, whenever you're done, and you go through your day, think about how many small wins you could stack. Walking into the gym is a small win. Not even finishing the workout. Walking into the gym is a small win. And small wins add up in your subconscious. You have to make sure that you're winning more than you're losing. You know, it's like the phrase in atomic habits. You know, if you think of your habits and what you're doing as voting, if you're running for governor, you don't have to get all of the votes. You've just got to get the majority of the votes. You got to get 51% of the votes in order to become governor. So think of every single action as a vote for the person you want to become. Look at your actions throughout the day and ask yourself, am I voting in the right direction? Am I voting for the Rob that I want to build? Am I voting for the Rob that is going to keep me in my comfort zone? Ask yourself this question, is what I'm doing right now getting me closer to or further for my goals? Right now, in this very moment, what are you doing? You're listening to this. Is it any closer to your goals? It might be because you're building up your mindset, but you got to take action eventually. I love that you're listening to this podcast, but you got to get off your ass at some point and start taking action. Hopefully you're taking action while you're listening to this podcast. That's like a, you know, double whammy. That's perfect, right? You're working on your mindset and you're conquering some stuff out in the real physical world. Small wins out up in your subconscious. You got to make sure that every single action that you take is adding up to a win. There's nothing worse than knowing that you should have shown up for yourself and you didn't. There's nothing worse than knowing that you could have done something better and you didn't. And you have that feeling of, damn it, I could have done it. I know I could have done it. I know I could have shown up for myself. I know I could have done this, but I didn't. I backed away. And that's something that I do too often. And instead of judging yourself, you look at it very subjectively and say, okay, I did it. Or very objectively and you look at, oh, I did it. That's, that's, that's, all right, I did it. Look at it objectively. Don't put any emotion to it and go, next time I won't do that thing that I did before. I'm going to show up for myself. I'm going to get little tiny wins. I'm going to start stacking them up. I'm going to stack up those little wins in my subconscious. Just have this visual reminder. Your subconscious is like a guy that's in the background. He's got stack of dominoes. He's putting some on the left. He's putting some on the right. The ones on the left are all of the times that you didn't show up for yourself. Or you gave up earlier. You said you were going to do something. You didn't do it. All of the ones on the right is the times when you showed up. The small wins. When you woke up and you said you're going to wake up. When you took the cold shower instead of the hot shower, you did everything that you needed to do to show up for yourself. That is exciting. Think of your subconscious guy stacking dominoes and think of it this way. If you want to create the life that you want, if you want to create the confidence that you want, that little guy needs to stack more dominoes on the right hand side of all the times you followed through for yourself. Hey, thanks so much for watching this video. If you want to learn even more about Master Your Mind, click right here and watch this video as well. There is no other option. I will always get what I want. I might not get it right away but I will eventually get what I want. If I want to grow a multi-million dollar business, I'll grow a multi-million dollar business and I won't give up until I get it.