 Okay, so we're looking at overcoming challenges and as individuals as a couple Just to be aware of the fact that yes Just because we are living We have challenges Lord Jesus himself said in this world you will have Challenges you will have tribulations But be a good share for I have overcome so the thing is the reality is that a child when challenges are Us personally or our marriage. It is a painful thing. No doubt. No, we're not in any way minimizing the pain It is a painful thing but We can go beyond we can receive healing we can go beyond that right so that's the good news. That's the That's it. That's the Encouragement that we have from our Lord and from scripture that there is a life beyond You know those challenges that we can live as overcomers. We can go through and come through Okay, now we're gonna look at some more challenges that we could be we could potentially face. Okay, and one such challenge isn't the area of the fact that that there could be Spouse in a marriage who's unsaved, you know, how does this happen? Well It could be because You know as a couple or as a husband and wife, right you One person came to came to know the Lord, right? You were not saved when you got married but then now In the course of marriage In the course of you know married life one one person comes to know the Lord and the other person is not saved and Because of that there are potential, you know, there's potential tension and conflict and challenges like in the family and the other thing could also be that well While getting married Even though the Bible says do not be unequally yoked with an unbeliever Well, one person just chose to ignore that and Because you know all kinds of reasoning, you know, you were emotionally attached to the person and a number of reasons But you made that choice, you know, the person one just makes the choice Based on emotions based on the fact that okay He or she is a good person And then go go on to make you know make that commitment get married and then you realize that well the person has very strong views about you know about world view about Have their own world views and then, you know, no matter what The person is not in a position is not in a place to receive Christ So that also causes a lot of tension that is that is a challenge Okay So this is what the word of God talks about in a 1 Corinthians 7 we Paul writes about, you know, this these kind of scenarios that can happen and On 1 Corinthians 7 we see this With his verse 12 right To the rest I not the Lord say if any brother has a wife who does not believe and She's willing to live with him. Let him not divorce her and the woman who has a husband who does not believe if he is willing to live with her let her not divorce him and Verse 14 for the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by their husband Otherwise your children would be unclean but now they are holy but if If the unbeliever departs Let him depart a brother or sister is not under bondage in such cases, but God has called us to peace For how can you be? How do you know a wife whether you will save your husband or how do you know or husband whether you will save your wife? Okay, so now now this is you know This verse many times is taken out of context and then and used and then reasoned And when people use it say to marry unbelieving people, okay, so this is a this is a situation where the husband where two people are already married and And then one comes to know the Lord is saved the other one is not saved Right and so so Paul is writing to such People or such situation in such people in such in the situations Saying that okay, this is what This is the scenario and this is what has happened If that one person in all the there are obviously there are conflicts that are differences There are things that are happening But it's saying that he's saying that if you know the Wife who does not believe is willing to live is willing to stay The differences are not so sharp Then let them stay let them live and so also it applies to the husband as well What is saying? Okay. That's fine. You believe this. I believe that but then I'm willing to stay and you know Let's let's go through life together fine. You know, let them stay Let them continue But also it says that if the unbeliever departs, okay, so the initiative is taken by the Unbeliever the person who does not believe that if the unbeliever departs Let them do so whether it's the woman or the man knows does not believe is not saved And they they're saying, okay. I want to you know, I want to end this marriage I want to leave then Saying that okay if they want to Then it's okay You're not under bondage in such cases You're not under bondage again, you know, it is a painful thing Right separation is painful Not undermining that but the scriptural instruction is if they want to go and If they are say adamant on saying that I know I want to end this then let them go Okay, let them depart Because you're not under bondage in such cases, okay, so first Peter 3 and verse 12 Sorry 3 verses 1 and 2 let me just put that up In the same way you wives must submit to your husband so that if any of them do not believe God's word Your conduct will win them over to believe it will not be necessary For you to say a word because they will see how pure and reverent your conduct is okay So the first case is like if they want to leave they can go They're not you're not bound in that case But even in 1 Corinthians 7 Paul writes and he says that You know verse 16, you know, how can we be sure that you know your life your conduct will draw them To Christ and they will get saved Okay, so that's good enough reason to continue on even though it could be difficult because the person might restrict Your living for Christ saying, okay, you cannot do this You cannot have prayer here Well, okay once it once a week church is fine But then you know don't bring that into the house, you know, let's not have any Bible study here No praying with the children, you know, all these kinds of things could happen but Your life and conduct could win the spouse over and and first Peter Peter also talks about the same thing it says You know when you when you submit yourselves the husband and the soul also applies to the husband to the unbelieving wife You know, how they would conduct themselves. So if even if the other person does not believe God's word Okay, so your life Your life's conduct and how you live your behavior your attitude everything will win them over to Christ And they do not you don't even have to say a word Right, there's no words reasonings It's not going to help because The other person might think okay, you have an agenda now Right, they're not able to objectively see the truth They're not seeking the truth in the first place they're not able to objectively see the truth because now You as a husband or you as a wife you're saying, okay, this is this is what I believe in and and you know, it's not It's not going to help unless They see the life They see the life they see the life Which means the words the attitudes the motives the thoughts the actions Everything and they see it consistently. It's not just on a Sunday when you return from church From the church service, but it's through the week on a Monday Tuesday Wednesday, you know, how does this person make choices? How does this person make certain decisions and how do they respond? react to circumstances all that so Because of their life, they'll be one over so it means that that opens their heart. Okay, and maybe I can consider now There is something to it Maybe now I will I can probably give a chance to listen to what they have to say right so far I Just completely close now I look at the life of my husband I look at the life of my wife Despite all that I have saw done and all that I have said all the things that I have restricted and all that You know, I've made life difficult for her. I've made life difficult for him, but I See the life they are living continuing to live. Maybe there is something more to it Right and so maybe it's time that I actually listen to what they have to say About why they made that choice, you know, really sit and listen. I've not done that so far But really maybe I can or even if I've heard maybe I can give an opportunity For Jesus maybe I can give one, you know, take that step open my life and See what will really happen, right? So that kind of a Place the spouse is able to come to if we live a, you know consistent life Okay So some key learnings is this that We see that God because we are righteous and we are in that place. We are the righteous one in that house well God will bless our spouse and the children as well Okay Again, I want to repeat this Retreat that this is a situation of two people who maybe got married when they didn't know Christ Right and now one of them has come to know Christ. So it's not like One person knows Christ one person does not know Christ and then you know, they make a decision Right It is well that could also happen or maybe a wrong decision may be a wrong choice And you're living with the consequences, you know, one is living with the consequences of that but No, this is the scenario okay, so The thing is that we see that God will bless Says okay, God is whatever blessing that you are receiving as a as a sanctified as a righteous person You know, the household is also experiencing that same blessing God chooses to bless because of your faith. Okay But we also see, you know, if the spouse willfully abandons and leaves because of your faith, it's fine. It's okay You know, but then the believing spouse is free to end that marriage If there is abandonment, okay So that is a thing that is a sequence if there is abandonment if the person chooses to leave and then, you know They can the logical conclusion is that yes this marriage Legally comes to an end There's a legal separation So that is that is possible. Okay, so Which gives rise to another question, you know, so what about divorce? Okay What about divorce? What is scripture? Yeah Yeah, yes Rosalind. So your question is, you know, can Can that person remarry in such case, you know, so so the so again, let me just spell it out You know, like so the person has abandoned the husband has abandoned and gone because he's of a different faith Doesn't want to continue in marriage. So the marriage ends legally, which means that there is a, you know legal divorce that happens because of the Law of the land the legal divorce that happens and in that case can the person remarry Well, the answer is yes and the and the and the reason is this because the divorce happened for You know, a biblically allowed a reason a scriptural reason Then the remarriage was also possible. Okay, we are going to look at that You know, what are the what are the scenarios in which the Bible says, okay? Divorce can happen. But first of all, you know, what are God's thoughts about divorce? Okay, so I hope I answered that question Rosalind But we'll, you know, when we look into this we will have even more, you know reasons You know, we're looking to the word, right? So so first of all, we just we just see that when we read Malachi to read Matthew 5 and All these scriptures, let me just see if I can put this up. We see that God is actually Yeah, these are some scriptures Malachi 2 verses 14 to 16 right Verse 16, especially if you see God says I hate divorce For says the Lord God of Israel, I hate it when one of you does such a cruel thing to his wife Make sure that you do not break your promise to be faithful To your wife or to your spouse. Okay, so so this God's this is God's heart. Okay Matthew chapter 5 The Lord Jesus are the words of the Lord Jesus Matthew chapter 5 verse 31 32 Anyone who divorces wife must given a written notice of divorce, which means that you can't be just frivolous about it Right can't just for any reason you cannot divorce verse 32. I but now I tell you if a man divorces wife For any reason other than her unfaithfulness Then he's guilty of making a commit adultery if she marries again Okay, and the man who marries a commit adultery also Matthew chapter 19 Some Pharisees came to him this was three Some Pharisees came to him and tried to trap him by asking does our law a lover man to divorce his wife for whatever reason he wishes This is the Lord's response to answer. Haven't you read the scripture that says that in the beginning the Creator made them male and female and God said for this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and unite with his wife and The two will become one so they are no longer to but one no human being must separate then what God has joined together Let not man separate but whom God is joined together Then the Pharisees asked him why then did Moses give the law for a man to hand his wife a divorce notice and send her away Was a Jesus answered Moses gave you permission to divorce your wife because you are so hard to teach and Another person says because of the hardness of your heart But it was not like that from the beginning and then the word Lord again read rates verse nine I tell you that any man who divorces wife for any cause other than her unfaithfulness Commits adultery if he marries some other woman. Okay Now One couldn't in seven the scripture that we saw now Paul writes he says for married people. I have a command which is not my own But the Lord's a man must a wife must not leave her husband. So this is again God's heart There was it's not an option or not the first option Verse 11, but if she does She must remain single or else be reconciled to a husband and a husband must not divorce his wife Okay, so this is the first and foremost thing God does not like divorce divorces not God's plan God not God's design So which means that every effort must be made in order to In order to not go in for that option of divorce every effort Every sincere effort every option must be explored. How can you know this couple or how can I you know? If you are the person who is being affected, how can I? You know stay in this Marriage what do I need to do in order to stay in the marriage? Okay Verse the verse that we read just now verse 15, you know a little earlier It says if one who is not a believer wishes to leave the Christian partner or believing spouse Let it be so so here, you know, so we so when we put these things together We understand that it was is not God's heart there was is not something that God wants That is not his plan and purpose. Okay, however In these kind of scenarios One spouse is married the others is a believer. The other is not and the unbelieving person wants to leave Then there is ground for divorce. Which means what is it? It means that it's abandonment The person is just Abandoning leaving and saying I cannot continue. I want to leave. Okay, so in such a scenario Yes, the scripture does such Just say that yes, it was permitted. But even then one must You know work at reconciling and see how You know the marriage can be saved But at the end of it, you know after all effort is made the unbelieving spouse chooses to leave. That's fine. Okay, then From the words of the Lord Jesus from what he how we address the Pharisees we see that If there is unfaithfulness Okay Again when we say that if there is unfaithfulness that's ground for divorce That is also it comes with the thing that Even if there's unfaithfulness, even if there has been repeated unfaithfulness and the trust has been broken Well, there can be reconciliation Right. So when you say unfaithfulness, we're saying that okay, the man, you know had an extra marital affair Whether the woman had an extra marital affair physical relationship with another person and You know, maybe it was there for you know, some some times a period of time and You know, obviously The spouse is hurt now that it has come, you know, it become public knowledge Maybe or she's come to know obviously hurt obviously does not trust the person Right. So even in that case Even in that place If the husband is repentant or if the wife is repentant saying, you know, yes, I know this happened but Can we put this behind I am repenting I'm asking for forgiveness This is this is why it happened. Whatever, you know, what could be the whatever could be the reason does not justify that happening But you know, this has happened. I'd like to come back and I and I seek forgiveness. I want to live a morally upright life Can you forgive can be reconciled? Yes You know in that case even the person who was hurt Can ask for time and say I'm not ready yet And I'm not ready yet. I need some healing. I need some restoration. You know, I need to think this over well can take time give it time and and Scripturally, you know, there is possibility of healing. You can receive healing. You can be restored marriage can be restored However, you know, if that unfaithfulness is a repeated offense if that unfaithfulness Continues on as a lifestyle the person is unrepentant and the person doesn't want to You know, excuse me, you know is unwilling to Change his or her ways Now that's ground. That's the political ground or biblical scriptural ground for divorce Okay, but with but also, you know having exhausted that option in the sense you tried to you know reason with a person to channel, you know, maybe there can be someone to Speak wisdom and say you need to change. This is not the way this and You know having exhausted that option Well, the Bible makes it plain the words of the Lord Jesus. Yes, if there is unfaithfulness Then it's fine. Okay, so So either it's unfaithfulness meaning adultery or If there is abandonment somebody just walks away Now what if there is there is, you know violence Right, what if there is violence in the sense the man is violent with a woman, you know as in most cases Yeah, I just want to be If any of the spouse is not repented for his or her act and still the other person decides to stay in the marriage Will it be wrong on his or her part in the eyes of God? Well Rosalind the the thing is it's a difficult scenario You know, it's it's it's it's going to hurt. You know, maybe, you know, this person is staying on for the sake of the Children the person is not repenting, you know The one who is maybe the husband of the wife is just not repenting just continuing to live the way he or she wants to live It's affecting definitely affecting the marriage. Well, but if the per if the spouse is choosing, you know, saying, you know I I still believe that God can work things out. I still believe that this person will change and I'm staying on because I You know, maybe the children's lives are at stake and you know, they are there already their life is affected because of this But then saying, okay, I won't I don't want to further cause any damage. I'm gonna stay and I'm gonna work things out And I'm believing God. Well It is it is fine, you know, it is fine in the eyes of God. It is actually, you know, absolutely She's doing a noble thing. It's a difficult thing But it's it's fine. You know, it's it's what God's heart is, right? But it's a difficult thing, right and Yeah, social pressure well kids are primary No, that's a that's a valid reason to continue to work things out. The social present not so much, you know, because You know others can say the relatives can say in-laws can say a lot of things But they're not going through it, you know, personally themselves. So, you know, it could be mistreatment. It could be, you know Verbal abuse. It could be sexual abuse. It could be whatever. No, they're not going through it Hey, they're not facing it. But here is this person facing it day in and day out and living under that roof. So Social pressure not so much. It's it's fine. You know, you can just actually Negate that but but yes, if there are children involved and for the sake of the children. Yes, that's a good enough reason but it's again a difficult choice a difficult decision and Having made the decision that definitely there is God's grace to empower that person to live that life and God will give ample opportunities for the Unrepentance spouse to change You know But it's thin ice, you know, it's that person is living a very dangerous life The person is moving away from you know, God's protective hand, right? It's moving oneself away from continuing to live in sin Opening his life or her life, you know, to the works of the enemy and the enemy comes to steal kill and destroy So it's a dangerous thing that they're doing but Yeah right so So if if there is, you know, yeah So if there is things so if the person does not repent now This is the consequence, but if the person repents, you know, and we've you know, we there are stories of Reconciliation and restoration and even from the depths of You know Immorality on one person's life unfaithfulness and you know, that has happened, right? Okay so another When it comes to remarriage, okay, so in all these cases if it's a biblical reason Because of which the divorce took place unfaithfulness abandonment Let's say domestic violence. Okay, so there is violence the the cause of action would be Self-preservation, okay, maybe violence in the home and One needs to save one's life. So If there's danger, you know violence to that extent, right or even otherwise to protect so for that sake They can be separation, right? You know, I I can't take that violence. I can't take that hitting anymore Right, I can't I don't I don't want to and this is not how God's design is for marriage. So well let's Let's be apart physically till Better sense prevails. There has to be you know, some kind of maybe counsel or input for both right one person to receive healing and from that trauma of Being violated And for the other person to to receive input and counsel that this is not how it is and it is well Not only is it scripturally wrong. It is against the law of the land. It's an offense right and They can be penalized put in prison for this And in some countries it's laws are very strict against domestic violence Right, even as so much a scratch That that person is inflicted. Well, they can be put behind bars And the punishment is very strict. So well In all these ways the person is a person is an offender. So definitely separation Till better sense prevails and counsel is received and change, you know, visible tangible change happens and then Yeah, yeah for the husband right to live together again, right and for them to maybe have individual counseling initially and Maybe they're not ready for joint session yet, but then come to a place of having a joint session of counseling together and Then the way forward right in case of domestic violence, but in case of domestic violence, okay It's been a pattern. Nothing has worked Repeatedly, you know, this is what is happening then that is again scriptural grounds for So so when when there's a scriptural ground for divorce and the divorce happens for these reasons not not for the sake of okay I I don't like this person anymore. We are not in camp in where we are in incompatible. We're not compatible anymore You know, not for those kinds of reasons trivial reasons, right? You know, we find we find that we are not Compatible, we're not able to relate to each other anymore. Not for those kind of things, you know So if the divorce happens for these kind of reasons, then it just goes For scriptural reasons if it happens then for scriptural reasons remarriage can also happen Okay, because we read in Let me just read One couldn't in seven Let me just read that scripture again It's here. Yeah Roman seven Two and three okay Romans chapter seven versus two and three okay For the woman who has a husband is bound Bound by law to her husband as long as he lives But if the husband dies, she's released from the law of her husband. So then if While her husband lives, she marries another man. She would be calling the interest But if her husband dies, she's free from the law so that she is no adulterous though She has married another man. So here in the case of in this case, it's about the death of a spouse. So the person having died now That is, you know The spouse is dead died About his dead. So therefore there is a cost that is a count for remarriage. Okay, the other thing that we see is One couldn't in seven. Okay, let's go to one content seven and worse And For I wish that all men were even as I myself But each one has his own gift from God one in this manner and the other and that But I say to the unmarried and to the widows It is good for them if they remain as I am but if they cannot He's talking about exercising self-control if they cannot let them marry for it is better to marry than to burn with passion So he's talking about remarriage again. So he's talking about people who are Either widows or unmarried okay, and When you're talking about unmarried, of course, you're talking about people who are single and people who are also who are Maybe legally the marriage has been dissolved, right? So saying okay, it is good for them to remain even as but if they cannot let them be married. Okay, then Verse 39 same chapter woman is bound by law as versus 30 38 39 40 talk about same thing echoes the same thing which Romans 7 talks about so so this is the thing, you know so if one person is a Widow if a person is You know divorced for these kind of scriptural reasons then remarriage is allowed for Scriptural reasons again remarriage is allowed If the should the person choose to remain single that's absolutely okay But if if the person chooses to remarry that is also fine, right? So Well, the thing is that You know, it's it's the thing is this, you know, we need to be careful In you know as a church as what do you believe was you know in In one you know in approving certain things and also in condemning Okay, let's say the divorce happened for XYZ reasons and then you know, there is this is a possibility of Then wanting to remarry Well, there has to be counsel, of course. There has to be counsel. There has to be There has to be preparation for marriage It should not be done hastily because there will be a repetition of the same kind of mistakes It should not be done hastily. There should be there should be preparation and There can be remarriage. So as a church, you know as as believers We need to kind of encourage, you know, once that that is stated once that is established Okay, this is for these reasons that the person is remarrying and it's not a trivial thing and and so on Well as a church It's not fair to keep condemning You know the divorce happened because of unfaithfulness and then, you know, maybe things have changed the person had a change of heart the person has You know as come to a place of repentance and etc. But what has happened has happened Okay, and now the person wants to you know, maybe the the divorce spouse You know he or she has Remarried and you know things have changed and then now here If the person should so desire to again remarry and live a you know, a live a normal life In a healthy marriage healthy family Well, they can do that, but there should be proper preparation proper, you know from from from the side of the Church or the ministry Preparing that because now, you know, let's say if they were children Things becomes very complex, right? It becomes a little complicated When it when it when you consider remarriage in what way is it complicated? Well, first of all the baggage of The previous marriage the negative things that would have happened emotional baggage of the previous marriage Now that needs to be there needs to be healing there needs to be I'll just stop presenting there needs to be healing there needs to be Restoration there needs to be preparation based on that If there were children from the previous marriage Okay, and the divorce happened the separation happened if there are children and if so who has the custody of the children Right as the husband has had the custody of the children does the wife have the custody of the children according to legally how it was settled in court And if the husband or the wife is seeking to remarry Now there are children Right so that also has to be considered so the preparation of marriage for marriage now is with the children in mind are the children ready Are the children emotionally prepared To To have this other person in their family Right so because they are biological father continues to be the father They could be visitation rights So it becomes a little more complex So the children have to be prepared as well Okay, so that is why scripture is very clean. I will shoot the person Paul says no if you don't want to Or you know just remain as as you are but It's just you know his wisdom is saying just remain as you are but then if you should choose to remarry then go ahead and do it But it has these difficulties it has these complexities not that you cannot face them But you need to be aware of them and prepared mentally emotionally Spiritually definitely we prepared to face them It's not going to be easy But it is possible So, you know we we need to look at all these things when we are considering the marriage Yeah Okay, so let me just stop here and you know, maybe you have some questions About divorce about remarriage We can talk about that Any questions Any questions at all And whatsoever Okay, fine. Is there are no questions That's fine. I just thought that there could be Some questions Especially, you know Especially about divorce when it comes to remarriage Okay, so I hope that you know this gives a clear idea about about divorce Also about challenges right about challenges faced by the husband by the wife And how to face them overcome them, etc. Right so you can go over the notes again Okay, so you can go over the notes again And how to face them overcome them, etc. Right, so you can go over the notes again Just to dwell on the scriptures that we looked at 1 Corinthians 7 Romans chapter 7 And the words of the Lord Jesus in the Gospel of Matthew Where he is talking about, you know, marriage is talking about divorce Malachi chapter 2, especially Matthew 5, Matthew 19. So all these scriptures Give us an understanding Okay, so we live in a world that is It is We see this prevalent There are single parents There are blended families Blended meaning People who Divorced, the husband is divorced, the wife is divorced And then they remarry And they have children from the previous marriage As well as their own biological children So then, you know, there are children from a previous marriage And then children from this marriage So that's what we call as blended families And so when that happens Well, how we need the wisdom You need the wisdom of God To handle that Also with children There should be no partiality Now No partiality in bringing up children And so it's a big ask It's a big commitment In such cases And one needs to be really Prepared In order to Go through Such kind of marriages Or be a parent And to make it Make the whole thing work Because that the Lord is in it Right? If we would Invite the Lord into that situation And the Lord is in it The Lord is for it So definitely One can make it work Okay So very Just wanted us to Now quickly go through The other aspect Of restoration Moving forward Which is to release things from the past Okay So I just want to quickly go through that Let me just share that Yeah So since we were talking about Divorce and remarriage Obviously It involves moving forward Like we said We don't want the past to control our present And definitely we don't want things happening In the present challenges To To affect our future Definitely not But the thing is how will that happen To desire Yes I don't want my present to affect my future I don't want my past to affect my present To desire that is great But we need to do something In the natural We need to do something In the emotional realm Or something Like for our emotions In order to be able to do that So that is to release the past So when we say release the past Okay We are talking about Releasing those hurts Those hurts that happened Because of our People who have been close to us Hurts that happened because of words Because of Maybe their attitude towards us Maybe their actions So if I were to ask you right now Can you think of One thing that is there on the top of your mind Someone who hurt you Someone who spoke anything To, you know, ill against you I'm sure something immediately comes to your mind Right Maybe in a few seconds you remember Certain Maybe that someone who spoke certain things And In a few seconds It comes to our mind So that means that we We still, maybe we have forgiven But that is still there in our minds Now that's a reality In a sense We forgive Well, we forget We receive healing But the memory remains We need to understand that Of those events Of those things that happened The memory remains While the memory could remain But the pain of that memory Need not The pain of that What we went through Need not be there Okay, there's a question here What can we do if one of the spouse Didn't see his expectation In his partner after getting married So that is what we looked at Now that is This expectation Of this is what Marriage would be like Now the expectation can be Realistic The expectation Can be very unrealistic expectation Right One might have a very unrealistic Maybe you watched the movies And you saw that happily ever after And wow It's like A picture out of Out of postcard You see that So it can be a very unrealistic expectation At times But If it is a realistic expectation Right This is what I expect Now the thing to do is How can I communicate that expectation How can I communicate that expectation With my spouse Well Maybe You know Maybe it's something to do with the love language Maybe it's something to do What is the expectation Maybe it could be something physical, emotional You know That expectation is not met Because maybe that person is communicating In a wrong way We looked at the love language How do I receive love How do I feel treasured Or nourished Or cherished When Maybe when the person spends quality time Maybe when the person When there's physical touch Physical intimacy Maybe when there is Words of affirmation When the person says it Maybe when the person gives a gift In all these different ways By which the person can communicate Maybe the spouse Maybe the spouse is not communicating In the right way Maybe that person thinks that If I do this Maybe I'm spending time But why is that person not thinking that I'm loving and I'm cherishing I'm spending time Am I not Well the other person feels that It's not spending time But actually if you open your mouth And say it Then I feel love Communication of the love language It could be because It can be sorted When there is a council When there is a marriage counseling And Scriptural marriage counseling This can be sorted So there can be an understanding Of expectations This is how this person feels loved Or this is how This person feels wanted So then I've been doing it wrong So let me now open up and share Open up and communicate the way The person wants it So it can be It can be changed And it can be met that way But it's very important Not to assume That the other person knows about my expectations But to really Share it I hope that helps Yes sir Thank you Okay so We were talking about releasing the past Releasing the hurts So the thing is that Well we can go into the future Step into the future Remember these events that have happened And come to a place Of Not Feeling those hurts Another question How can we deal with this We have no ill feeling against the person Talking about that person to others Whenever that topic comes in And Yeah in a very light manner Okay And not getting angry Okay so there's no anger There's no bitterness But then You bring that up in conversations You bring that person Which means you remember that incident In conversations But you're actually in a light manner In the sense Yeah you're making fun of the whole thing Well as long as both Are enjoying it You know laughing about it That's fine You know you're forgiven You're saying as long as both As long as it's not gossip As long as not Aligning the other person's reputation Or whatever As long as if the person was there Would they also enjoy That's fine Well If that whole thing is behind you And if it's not Very sensitive If you would talk in a public setting And the other person is also Laughing right along with you Then I guess it's okay In the absence of that person Okay that person is not there Then you just need to make sure That it's not gossip That it's not Something that's Interfering with the reputation of that person Digging down the name of that person Reputation of that person As long as it's not communicated in that manner Then it's fine Right Yeah So that's the thing Okay so I guess We have time We just need to wind up So we'll stop here So pressing forward This chapter 12 I really like us to Go through it And as a self study Because we're going to be dealing with it In healing and deliverance Also Or you already dealt with it I'm not sure So I just wanted to be a self study You can go through it You can go over it And next class We'll straight away jump into Chapter 13 Marriage relationship Protecting it rather So we'll go into Chapter 13 straight away Okay right Thank you God bless See you again