 Welcome to another show of Celebrate Life. My name is Gary D. Carlos, and I am your host. The inspiration for this show, this absolutely wonderful show in my mind, although I'm a bit prejudiced, I must say, comes from two places. One is this past year, I had the opportunity to write my own memoir for my daughters. And also, over the years, I've read many a obituary and wished that I had met this person while they were alive. So I started this show as an opportunity for monitors from all different walks of life to have an interview with me so they can share their life with you while they're very much alive. Amazing people, and I'm a strong believer that everyone has a story to tell. If you're interested in being interviewed on this show or if you have a question for the person I'm interviewing, please drop me a note at celebratelife0747 at gmail.com. And I'll make sure that our guest gets it, and I'll put you on our list to be interviewed down the road. So today I'm honored to have as my guest, David Burrard. And by the way, I'm dedicating this show to Recovery Month, which is nationally happening and also very much in Vermont. And I've gotten to know David over the years, he's a very special person, he does magic with his hands, he can build just about anything you want on the build, he's bright, hardworking, dedicated, and he perseverance is probably the one word that captures a lot of who this guy is. And I'm really honored to have David here and have him tell his story to our viewers. Welcome, David. Thank you, Gary. Thank you. Glad to have you here today. Glad to be here. So here you are, if you wouldn't mind, let's go back in your life and when you're a young boy, what was life like when you were younger? Oh God, so I grew up in a, my family was pretty wealthy actually, and we grew up in South Burlington, Vermont, huge house. My father owned an excavation company, my mother owned a pool company. So again, we're pretty wealthy, and childhood was pretty good. Up until I was six years old actually, December 25th actually Christmas, and my father ended up leaving the house, leaving the family. But I think everything up until that point, it was great. I mean, I had best friend next door that I grew up next to. You know, I was friends with all the kids in the neighborhood. Yeah, it was great. I actually lived right across from Butler Farms. So I remember going into Butler Farms from Hinesburg Road. And yeah, probably had 20 kids that we used to play with. Nice. Yeah, yeah, so it was great. I got along with everybody. I was never picked on as a kid. Yeah, it was great. When you were a young boy, did you have dreams of what you would be when you grew up? You know, again, my father owned an excavation company. So that's what I remember wanting to be when I grew up was just somebody like my father, you know, to be able to sit in the equipment and do it just like he did. So, yeah, that became a passion of mine throughout the years. Yeah, yeah, that's it. I didn't want to be a police officer or, you know, a firefighter or anything. I just remember wanting to be exactly like my dad. Yeah. Did you have brothers and sisters, David? I thought three sisters. No brothers, unfortunately. But yeah, I grew up with my three sisters. Yeah, and it was interesting, to say the least. Where do you fit on the kaleidoscope of your other sisters? Yeah, so I have two older sisters, one's eight years older, one's five years older, and then I have one younger sister by one year. I'm pretty good with all of them. That's great. Yeah. So, you wanted to, you know, it sounds like you had two parents that were very successful business people. Yeah. And yes, has that influenced you in your life? You know, it has. I still look up to my father, you know, I'm 37 years old and my father is still, yeah, he's still actually in my life. I still look forward, or look up to my father, only because those were hard shoes to fill, you know, he was successful. And I think the beauty of it was he wasn't handed anything. Everything that he did was self-accomplished. He was never given money to do it. You know, everything was from his dead kitchen and his hard work and his devotion to it. Yeah. So just seeing that growing up, you know, it really influenced me to be more like my father. And I think obviously through my trials and tribulations, you know, that's how I've gained a lot of my perseverance and vigilance. But again, I think just having my father as an icon to look forward to and as something to give me guidance with that definitely helped me. Yeah. What are some of the lessons that you've learned from your father? Oh, my goodness. So my father's motto growing up was always, you made your bed, you can lay in it. You know, as a younger kid, I never liked it. I did not like it. I learned to value that though. So nothing's handed to us. I shouldn't say us. I should speak for myself. Nothing's ever been handed to me. I've had to work hard for everything that I've had and all my accomplishments, you know. And I think just even through all the ups and downs though, I learned that these are my choices. They were mine alone. You know, so I had to deal with the consequences, whether for the good or for the bad, you know. Yep. So, yeah. So did you have some, when you're still thinking of your younger years, whether some nice experiences that you had, vacations or relatives coming over or special events, things like that? So again, my parents were kind of wealthy. So I remember we had a bar downstairs in our house and we used to do these parties. I honestly don't remember exactly what the parties were for. I don't know if it was New Year's or, you know, I just remember my parents always having these huge parties. So, yeah, that was kind of neat, you know. I felt like everybody, everybody wanted to be at the barred house, you know. As far as vacations, we didn't go on too many. I remember Park Safari. And, you know, I remember a couple, they're a little hazy, a little foggy memories from there because I was quite young, you know. Yep. But I do remember some things from there. Santa's Village, I believe it's in New York and I'm not mistaken, but Santa's Village. I remember going there, seeing the reindeer, just being with my mother and my sisters, you know. That was some great memories, you know. But yeah, no significant vacations that really stood out. What was school like, David, for you? Oh, God. So, school was all right. School was good. I really, I didn't have any troubles. Other than my speech, I remember how to see a specialist, Miss Fox. I used to have a speech impediment. I think that was the only real trouble that I had going through school. You know, and then, things changed for me once I hit seventh and eighth grade. You know, I think people places and things, you know, I was just out with the wrong crowd. And my father wasn't in the picture. You know, so I started becoming a bit rebellious. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. So school was okay up until, up until again, that point. That was my turning point, you know. Right. All right. And then so high school years were, were tough, tougher given that or what happened in high school? Yeah, so I can tell you, it's very specific outplayed out. January 17th of 98, you know, I was in ninth grade. And I was while eighth grade going into ninth grade, and I was diagnosed with diabetes. Type one insulin dependent, you know, diabetic at 14 years old. And I could not cope with it. I could not deal with it at such a young and tender age. I felt like I was alone in the world, you know, and that really played out. You know, even up until this point, but especially throughout my school years. And, and there was for the worse. Yeah. January 17, I was diagnosed. I remember January 19th. I was with a friend of mine. His name was Tyler. And we decided to go to my dentist and trick her into getting some perks sets. And it helped me. My motive behind it was to try to mask some of the pain, the physical pain that I was dealing with for my diabetes. If any, if anybody knows anything about diabetes, I was diagnosed that blood sugar is 1700. So physically my body was shutting down. So yeah, I ended up getting some opiates to try to mask the pain. And that was it. It was a snowball effect from there. And it, you know, I was just all downhill. So, so being a diabetic, there's a lot of physical pain that goes with that too, David. Yeah. Yeah. So I think now my body reacts very differently to high blood sugar than it did, you know, 22 years ago, 23 years ago. At first, though, I can recall my body just feeling really weak and fatigued and sharp pains. So it was affecting my nerves, you know. And yeah, I just wanted to do anything to try to mask the pain. Yeah. So you basically self-medicated to deal with the diabetes and the pain that went with that. Yeah. Yeah. And again, you know, I was, I was pretty rebellious and getting, getting diabetes at that age. I didn't want to accept it. So I wasn't probably taking care of myself, you know, and in all honesty, even these days, you know, everything, I could always get better at it. I could always get better at it, but it's very difficult. You know, diabetes is definitely very difficult. They've come a long way in terms of how to treat it. You know, they have insulin pumps now and continuous glucometers, but 23 years ago, you know, I had to take out a vial and I had to take out the syringe. And I, you know, I had to prick my finger five times a day. And at 14 years old, having a perfect life, so to speak, other than my father leaving, but you know, health-wise having a perfect life up until that point, you know, so it was very difficult to accept. Yeah. You had to give yourself shots, it sounds like. Yeah, to give myself, you know, five shots a day. Yeah, five shots a day. Yeah. Per meal, you know, I'd give myself a shot per meal to lower the blood sugar. Right. Then I would take another shot before I went to bed with another shot for long-acting. Wow. And it was quite the process back then, you know. Wow. Yeah, you said that your level of, your sugar level is 1700. What's a normal, what's a normal person's sugar level? 100. 100. Oh, yeah. So anything, anything after a blood sugar of 300, what happens is your body starts spilling ketones and your body performs something called the DKA, diabetic ketoacidosis. So potentially your body breaks down and starts burning muscle for energy rather than fat for energy. Okay. When that happens, it's a, it's a deadly acid and that's, that's something that I've put myself through, you know, for a lot of years. So I was always constantly fighting that only because my blood sugars were always elevated. Right. With that comes a lot of nausea, a lot of sickness. You know, again, your body essentially is just breaking down. And, you know, I dealt with that for years and years only because I, again, I didn't want to accept it. I didn't want to take the shots, you know. So I would push my body to the limits. And yeah, I mean, Ben and Koma's before I, I can't even tell you how much time I've actually spent at UVM hospital. So many countless nights and days. I just, I've been admitted probably around, I dare say 300 times. Wow. Oh, yeah. And that, that's just for the diabetic side of things. Yup. That was just diabetes. And that was just, you know, in the first 15 years of it. Holy mackerel. So, yeah. Yeah. And then, so then that willful young kid, who didn't want to accept this, starts to take some drugs to deal with the pain. And that had its own ramifications for your life as well. Yeah. Yeah. I was dealing with two diseases, you know, and I didn't know how to cope. Yeah. I did not hope. I guess, you know, I really use opiates to mask all the pain and the emotions that I was dealing with from the diabetes. And, you know, they played hand in hand. They fed off from each other. And I thought it was helping me. It was just creating a bigger down spiral, you know, yes. Yes. Yeah. And so that down spiral went very low. And you've had some really tough times. I know. From our conversations in the past that literally you died at some point and we're saved through Narcan and other things like that. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Oh yeah. I was just going to touch on that real fast. I've been Narcan. I think from empties a total of nine times, you know, and brought them back from my friends. I haven't really put in too much thought or consideration in this, but I believe it was five or six times for my friends where I've had to, you know, be Narcan because I was overdosed. Yeah. Yeah. I was at no return, you know. Yeah. Oh, yeah. You know, it's a day of it. You're still, you're alive and still here. I'm here. Contributing to the community, contributing to your own life. Yeah. There's something inside you that is bigger than even these two disorders. What is that? Tell me about that. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I mentioned will, willfulness, um, determination. Where does that come from? Because you. I've hit some. You know, um, Using a boxing analogy, you would get square in the face and yet. You're knocked down, but you get back up. Yeah. Yeah. Hey, you know. Hey, I'm not. I'm not quite sure exactly where it comes from. I'm not a survivor and I will never give up. Um, and you're absolutely right, Gary. I've been at the lowest of lows. Um, you know, I've. Woken up out of comas and, um, Woken up out of overdoses, you know, um, By all rights, I should not have woken up. Um, And I'm not, I'm not sure. I'm not sure what drove me to get back up in the week back up and, uh, you know, but. I just know deep within, um, I'm not a quitter. And then, uh, I don't want to quit, you know? Mm hmm. Mm hmm. So I challenged myself. You know, throughout these times, I want to succeed. I want to do better. You know. I think in those moments, I really, I get. I get very upset with myself that I've gotten to that point. Mm hmm. Uh, very angry with myself. And that's the little fire. That's lit. Um, self lit, you know, um, but that's, that's kind of when I start getting mad at myself and upset. Um, it drives me to, to want to excel and do better and not. Be, um, you know, overcome or beaten by that. You know, yeah. Um, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And so. Yes. And here you are. You're in recovery at this point. Um, diabetes is still doing its thing. Yeah. Um, any, what, what are some of the things that keep you going at this point? I mean, you've got a lot of, got years of experience with this. Both of them. Yeah. Uh, what are some of the, some of the things that you found that. Um, you know, you know, you know, besides that determination and that willfulness that. Keep you going that perhaps could help, help some of the audience for understanding how they can keep going. I'm glad. I'm glad you mentioned that and brought that up. I think. I was very selfish at a younger age. And I, I still deal with selfishness, you know, 37 years old and everything that I've been through. I still deal with it. I still deal with it. I still deal with it. I still deal with it. I still deal with it. Now is I can identify and I can catch it. And I can change that. I think what motivates me now is being able to share it. Um, give away the knowledge and the things that I've learned, you know, throughout the years. Again, whether that be for the, for the good or for the bad. You know. Um, I think the best part for me now, though, is being able to share it. You know, I'm glad you mentioned that. How do you do that, David? Um, by doing exactly what we're doing right here. You know, so thank you very much for creating this. Glad to help. I mean, I've stood up numerous of times in meetings, a meetings and a meetings. I shared my story. Um, quite a few times. Um, you know, but to be able to do it every day, you know, that would be a blessing. I mean, you know, I'm not exactly what I do on a smaller scale. You know, but you know, so somebody just asks me a question about my diabetes. And, uh, if I'm able to share a bit of my experience. You know, it's a, it's a good feeling. Just be able to go on and, and to share that with somebody, you know, David, for, for people in the audience that don't have an, and any understanding of addiction or substance use disorders. You know, you know, you know, you know, you know, there's a sense of what it's like when you're in the throws of it. What? What? Yeah. What? That. That is the tightest grip, uh, that you could possibly imagine. Um, the grip that addiction has on people. Um, is like none other. And. It's such a vicious cycle because. How you're going to just feel well, how you're going to maintain. I think when you're in the grips of addiction, it's not even about getting high. Anymore. I mean third feeling. It's, uh, literally just how you're going to feel well, how you're going to be able to maintain. How you're going to be able to function to get up the next day and go to work or go to a family event. You know, um, and it's such a vicious, vicious cycle. Um, and what went when you're in the depths of it really. It just feels like you keep sinking and there's, there's no outlet. And even, even when people give you an out. You don't want to accept it because. Literally addiction is all, you know, at that point. Mm hmm. You know. Um, it's so hard to elevate yourself and step outside of that box. And look at the bigger picture. Um, you know, now it's very easy for me to say, yeah, you know, I just, um, I picked up the phone and I called the rehab and I went in and, and a week later I was good, you know, very easy for me to say that now. When you're going through it. That is literally life changing decisions, you know, and it is, it's so scary at that point. Um, yeah. So. When you think of the general public, people who are, are not, if not directly affected by addiction or substance use disorder. What would be your message to them of how they could be helpful for those that are in the middle of it. We're in the throes of it. I think it's, I think it's. You know, a. Case by case. But I think to generalize it. Um, being supportive, just being there offering a lending hand. Is possible. Um, and I think I can speak for more than just myself at this point because I've been in the rooms for a lot of years. Yep. I've been dealing with addiction. Um, for a couple of decades now. I think just offering that support is the biggest thing. Um, you know, that's the night and day difference right there. What you try to force it on somebody. Again. Um, it doesn't work out the best. You know, when you try to, when you try to force it on an addict that doesn't want to hear it, that doesn't want to make that change. If they're just not ready for it. Um, they're, they're going to turn their backs to you. You know, and we could just close you, shut you out of their life, you know, for good family members. Um, I can tell you addiction is not prejudice is not biased, not sexist. Um, you know, it, uh, it'll take anybody. Um, so yeah, I think that the biggest message, the biggest thing that I could, they would be just be supportive. You know, offer that lending hand in like weeks, months. It could even take years. I know it took me years. Um, but thankfully I had people in my life that were supported, that were still there offering the help. And, um, yeah, I, I, I finally took that help and, um, you know, made it. So it's not, so it, it, you know, what you're basically saying is please don't judge me. And please don't tell me to do something. Just be there for me. Yeah. Just be there for me, love me and understand, try to understand I'm in the midst of a very difficult thing. That, uh, yeah. Yeah. I mean, we could, we could talk about addiction all day. And, um, until you actually go through it, until you actually walk it, walk that line, you know, um, you don't quite understand what it's like. Um, I've now been on both ends where I've been the addict and I've also been the one to support, um, be supported for, for addicts, you know, um, on various different levels. And, um, yeah, I just, as long as, you know, right, judging, like you had said, Gary, um, because it was addicts, we're sensitive. We're sensitive people, although it seems like you have no heart and no emotions. We're sensitive people. And, um, yeah, it, judging an addict is definitely, uh, one of the worst things that you can do is very easy to do though. You know, it's understandable. You know, quick, people are quick to judge. Um, but it doesn't help. Right. Right. There's another side of the world of addiction that I know you and I've experienced myself and that's lost. Lost a lot of friends over the years. Yeah. And, um, how, how does that, I mean, I, when I have, I've been in this field for about 10 years now. And I don't think I've ever experienced more loss in my life than that 10 years. Wonderful people, amazing people. And the, their substance use disorder took them. Um, how do you deal with that, David? You know, I think by, not dwelling on it and just trying to remember the good times and celebrate the time that you had with them, you know, is the best way for me to get and through a loss. Um, unfortunately, loss is part of life though. You know, and, um, it's always, it's always a difficult thing to deal with. Um, but yes, I've, you know, we've lost some amazing people. You know, through addiction and, um, yeah, I think just trying to remember the good times that you had with them and, uh, you know, keep that forefront. Yep. Yep. Okay. Thank you. Sure. So you have a lot of talents. Uh, I've, I've seen some of those out there, but, um, Oh, it's how the audience about your career, your work and, and, and, and maybe hopes for what you like to do in the future. Yeah. So my grandfather, Rainey Burrard, he was a colonel in the army and, um, uh, he owned a construction company called Burrard construction. While he owned that, my father owned Alan's excavating. So I was, um, you know, very fortunate and very blessed to be able to grow up with a very, uh, business oriented family, a very skillful, you know, and, um, as a young age, looking up to my father, um, everything that he did, it stuck with me, you know. And, um, so I watched what my father did and, um, everything that he could do. And I learned from it, you know, I dare say I probably around 90% of everything I know these days is from my father, you know, um, whether that be plumbing, electrical, you know, framing, just any kind of carpentry. I really, I learned from my father and, um, YouTube as well. You know, YouTube is one of the best things out there. But yeah, I think, um, the majority of the skills that I, that I had acquired, you know, definitely were from my father and just, um, being very observant of him, you know. Yeah. And you've had your own businesses, um, you know, doing repair work and fixing things up and building. Yeah. So I, um, you know, I've tried many different things throughout the years. I mean, I was, uh, I was a sous chef over at our house, Bistro for a couple of years, um, cooked on the food network channel. You know, so that was a notch on the bow. Wow. Yeah. So that was pretty neat. Um, tried painting company. You know, I was pretty successful at that. Um, you know, I think where my heart and passion is, um, really is, well, with excavation, that's, that's really my passion. That's something I love to do. Um, but also just hands on handyman work, you know, um, so I, I think to be fair, I can tell you what my dream job would be at this point. Um, you know, I'm still learning skills and, um, learning to do things almost every day. Um, so I'm not sure exactly what my dream job would be. Um, it would be with the hands though. With the hands. Okay. Yeah. Yep. All right. Um, what do you like to do for fun? David. Oh my God. You're, you're, you're joys in life. Yeah. So I really like biking. I like biking. I've got a couple of bikes now. Um, I don't do it as much as I'd like. To, uh, only because I don't have a lot of free time. Um, but I love to bike. I really like to go on walks and stuff. One of my huge passions was playing pool. Uh, my mother played in the billiards. You know, years and years and years ago, my mother has so many iconic stories about playing pool. And, uh, you know, she encountered some Hells Angels riders that tried to, you know, steal rings from her. And I, you know, was there to help her out and probably saved her life at that point. You know, um, so, uh, both of my parents, they're pool sharks, you know, and, um, yeah. So I can remember at a young age, going to the bars with my parents, um, playing pool. You know, it's just something that I love to do. And I got, I got pretty good at it. So yeah. And, uh, bowling as well. I remember we used to go bowling. As a family when we were kids. And, um, I got a bunch of trophies. Now there's skunk trophies for last place, but they're true. No judging. Uh, I got a lot of skunk trophies, but, uh, Yeah. Bowling bowling. You know, it's just something that I love to do. And I got, I got pretty good at it. So yeah. And, uh, bowling as well. I remember we used to go bowling. As a family when we were kids. And, um, I got a bunch of trophies. Now there's skunk trophies for last place, but bowling bowling was a passion of mine. I love bowling even to this day. And, uh, I know you can, you can share a bit of that with me as well. You love to bowl. Yes, I do. Absolutely. Yeah. Interesting. Yeah. Um, Sports. I wasn't too much into sports. Um, I think basketball probably would have been my favorite sport. Uh, football and basketball. Um, You know, I enjoy, I enjoy playing basketball. You know, I can do a couple of cool things with the ball. Makes me look cool. So I try to. Uh, But yeah, I think, I think basketball probably would have been one of my favorite sports. Uh, Celtics. Celtics has the team. Boston. Yep. Yep. Yeah. Yeah. Is there, um, A life motto or a favorite quote that you have that you'd like to share with the audience? I think. Um, If it makes you happy, work hard at it. Hmm. That's a beautiful. Yeah. You know, As I find myself getting older. Um, I think happiness. Is something that I value now. Um, I can't say more than anything, you know, that wouldn't be fair. But to be happy right now is the ultimate goal for me. Mm hmm. At 37 years old, I'm still very young and very young at heart. Um, But I've been through a lot throughout my life. You know, and, um, I have lived through a lot of moments that definitely we're not happy. Um, Very, very fearful. Um, you know, in very alone moments, but. I think. Happiness and contentment. Um, you know, are some of the things that I mostly look forward to nowadays. Mm hmm. So I think, I think a life motto really mind would be if it makes you happy, work hard at it. Yeah. Yeah. You know, So, And so there's, it sounds like what you're saying too is that if you find joy in your work. Do the best you can in that work to bring you that joy and happiness. Yeah. The best you can be. Absolutely. Yeah. The good things do not come for free in life. You know, even short term, if it seems like it. They don't come for free. There's always a price. Yeah. So yeah, if you work hard at something that you love and you enjoy it. You know, put your everything into it. Um, the, the, the payout is well worth it. You know, Yeah, good advice. What does family mean to you, David? Everything. Everything. Um, I think. My family. You know, I've been some of the biggest supporters in my life. My three sisters, my mother, Even my father from a distance with that tough love. Um, But he's been there always pick up on, you know, With all my family, they'll always pick up the phone for me. Um, you know, So I think family for me is, is everything. We're not perfect by any means. You know, we've got our fair share of fights and, uh, You know, we, we've distanced ourselves, but we've learned from it. We've been able to learn from it. And, um, you know, evolved from that. Yeah. Yeah. I just, um, I wouldn't trade anything in the world. You know, for, for my family now. That's great. Yeah. Is there anything we haven't touched on that you would like to talk about? Your life. Oh. Um, yeah, I think that. I think just where I'm at now. And, um, how powerful. Um, motivation can be and determination. So. I'll kind of, I'll kind of do like a. A quick overlook of this. Yeah. Growing up. Um, my father had left at a very young age. And, um, you know, I, I kind of, my father was there once a week, but, um, It's fair to say I didn't really grow up without a father figure in my life. Um, So things got pretty tough for me. Um, at the age of 14, I was diagnosed with diabetes and, um, I invited addiction into my life at that point. You know, so those two things, um, Were, were deadly mix for me. Um, You know, then I went through school and, uh, unfortunately, Uh, gotten a lot of trouble. A lot of legality issues, you know, throughout school and, uh, didn't make it through high school. I had to drop out. I got my GED, uh, later, later in life, but, uh, still at that point, just, uh, it wasn't working for me. Yeah. Yeah. And then, uh, you know, to fast forward a little bit more, um, I started, uh, you know, breaking into houses and, uh, doing some very wrong things to feed my addiction. Sure. Um, yeah. So my life at that point was just crumbling. Um, I really felt like I had nothing to look forward to. Nothing was driving me, uh, to wake up in the morning. You know, uh, nothing that I could see, nothing immediate was just driving. Um, I was just in fighter flight mode. You know, and, um, I had gone through numerous of, um, Uh, rehabs to try to better myself. And, um, numerous attempts. And I can't say that they were failed attempts. You know, I learned something from each and every one of them. I met people. I learned tools that I just hid in my toolbox. You know, I'm at the right times, but for me, they were never failed attempts. You know, they were all a success, even if I didn't complete the program. Yeah. Um, but I had still, uh, wasn't where I wanted to be at in life. I was still, uh, my addiction was getting the best of me. Uh, I was allowing my diabetes to get the best of me. I was allowing myself to get the best of me. And, um, I really had to just buckle down and, uh, do what needed to be done to get back onto that right track. And, uh, I thought that I did. Um, it was about 10 years ago now. My mother was assaulted and she was left paralyzed. Um, from addicts that were trying to, you know, my mom's addict herself and, uh, they tried to rob her for money and, um, and her drugs and, uh, left my mom for dead, you know, left her paralyzed and emergency brain surgeries. But that was a real turning point in my life. Um, at that point, I didn't care. I didn't care even about myself, uh, enough to do anything about it. You know, so we were talking about spiraling points before. Right. At that point in my life, I let everything go. Um, and I was on a war path. Um, but I think, and I wouldn't get too much into, you know, details and the bad parts about that. Um, but I thought with my addiction, um, more than I had ever before at that point. And it really took, it really took a lot of people, not to turn their backs on me, a lot of support, a lot of determination, um, to finally start to get back on the right track. You know, um, my mom tried the attack, you know, but again was left paralyzed. Um, my health was in shambles at that point. My life was in shambles. I couldn't hold the job. Um, I didn't have a vehicle and I had no place to live. And, um, you know, I was sleeping on the streets and sneaking into people's houses. Um, you know, I would stake out a house and, and, um, you know, figure out when it was safe to be able to sneak in. Uh, just be able to get out of the cold. You know, um, but with all that being said, um, I, I had the support, I just wasn't utilizing it, but I had the support from friends and family, family, most of all. And, um, I finally started to do something about it, you know, um, and it, it took a lot. It took a lot of, um, you know, rehabs and reaching out to that support. Um, a lot of meetings and any meetings, a lot of turning point center. Um, but I finally got to a point into my life where. I felt good about being myself. I felt good to be David Burrard. I had never in my life been able to say that before. Um, yep. Um, I think again, through all my trials and tribulations and all the fears, but the biggest part for me was being able to. Not overcome those, because I don't think we really ever overcome it. Um, but being on the winning end of it. You know, um, so I, I think. It just, it took a lot, a lot of energy, a lot of time to get to that point. Um, but it was worth it for me because I could finally say I was, I was content. You know, I was starting to be happy with things and I felt that before. Um, so through all that, you know, and I got a bunch of war stories I could tell. Um, but to sum it up, I think I've been through the worst of worst. And, uh, yeah, just when you stick to it and, and you keep on fighting that fight. Um, you know, it, it, it does pay off. You know, so where I'm not nowadays, um, I have a successful. Uh, oh, I shouldn't say that because it's kind of seasonal. It's successful for me though, but I have a little successful company. Um, you know, I have a painting company and, uh, you know, um, I work a couple full times, full time jobs that I'm, I'm valued in, you know, I'm appreciated. Um, my family, you know, when they call me, they like to talk to me, you know, they want to talk to me. Um, I have a house. Uh, I don't have a house. I have a little condo. Um, but the place that I can call home. Um, I've never had that before. You know, I can never call a place my own. Um, because I just wasn't there in life. You know, yes. Yes. So I think with that being said, um, I'm successful. And, um, although a lot of things I still drive to do better in, um, you know, I'm content with where I'm at. I'm happy with where I'm at in life in comparison where I was. Right. You know, so with everything that I've been through, you know, just as long as you, you keep fighting and, um, you know, you keep that determination, not vigilant, um, you'll get to where we're maybe not where you want to be, but where you need to be, you know, Good point. Good point. So, wow. You just said a whole lot and thank you for sharing that, David. Yeah. So there's some messages in there for people who today might be still struggling with addiction and not in recovery. And one of the things you said that was very powerful is that there was no. Sailed. Uh, treatment that you went through that you learned something from each of them, even though you might have not completed the program or. Maybe you relapsed right after the program. But there was something in each of those. Uh, treatment programs that you went to that you took away from that you put into that toolkit. Absolutely. Um, that'd be one thing I think that would be an important message to those that are today struggling still. Yeah. Is not to beat up on yourself, but to take away something from every experience that you go through. Absolutely. Yeah. And then the other thing that you said that. Really was powerful is that you've grown to really. Accept who you are and like who you are and feel good in your own skin. Yeah. Yeah. And that's taken a lot of work. Yeah. Yeah. That's, you know, that's. It was definitely a challenge throughout my life. Um, so for me to be able to say that is, is, yeah, it's, it's very powerful. Um, But I think the point to that was. If you just stay at it and you, you, uh, you know, you, you put the work in again, nothing comes for free. Uh, and if it does, it's probably not real. Um, You put that work in and, um, yeah, I'm just proof that, um, the payoff is worth it. You know, You have to work hard today, David. Still, you still, oh yeah. Work just as hard as I ever had before. You know, it just looks different. Um, but yeah, I still wake up. Um, you know, I, I go to work. Um, don't get much sleep. Um, but I'm able to come back to my own house and take off my work boots and, um, you know, relax. I don't have to go, you know, sleep on a park bench or. Yes. Sneak somebody's house. Yes. Well, Thank you for sharing that story. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you guys. You captured just about everything we said for the first 40 minutes in that 10 minutes. And much appreciated. Absolutely. Um, Any parting words that you might want to share with the audience? Parting words. Um, Yeah, I think. Again, and I know I'm sound like a broken record. Um, You know, I'm not fighting the good fight. You know, you just keep on, keep on working at it no matter what you're going through. Don't give up. You know, Don't, don't give up whatever you do. And, uh, again, it might take days, months, years, um, to feel like you've accomplished it. Um, And even if you don't. Successfully accomplish it. You'll feel better about it because you put in that work and you, you try to do something about it. You try to meet. And I think that's the most valuable thing is at least trying. Yeah. You know, and, and just not up. Well, David, thank you so much. Thank you for being who you are. And thank you for your time today. Um, and to the audience, if you have a question for David. Uh, right to me at celebrate life. 07 47 at gmail.com and I'll get it to David. And he'll respond to you. Um, and thank you again, David. You're a, you're a hell of a guy. Thank you very much, Gary. I appreciate that. Okay. Take care.