 Imagine that. That's me when I was 18 years old. And that's a story for another day. But speaking of stories, I have a really good one for you today. It's one of the coolest moments I probably had in my life. There's plenty of them. I had quite a few cool moments. But this one is actually coming from my spiritual background when I was still a devoted student of spirituality questioning the question of who am I, trying to realize the big truth of life, meditating, and that led me to India where part of my time I spent in a oh my god my nose itches. And now I realize I won't cut that out because this is a one take video. Well it is what it is. So that journey took me to India where part of the time I spent, well I went to see Ali Lama in Dharmasala, listened to him talk. But before that I went to a famous city called Rishikesh which is told to be the unofficial world capital of yoga. And it's kind of a weird city because there's, I think I'd say it became very commercial because there's so many tourists, there's so much stuff which is like, you just feel like you're I don't know, in some hippie yoga poster or something and there's a lot of people trying to sell you yoga related stuff. But so there were cool things and they were like, not so cool things. But that being said though there were a lot of ashrams there and my teacher of the day he invited me to go to Amanas Jay which is called an ashram in India and to meet some of his friends who were monks there and interestingly enough although it's an Indian ashram, monastery and it was full of Indian monks there were a couple of monks who were Canadian, actually a father and daughter and they were both quite aged but actually really incredible people. I remember the father's name, his sacred name it's Swami Atmas Rupananda he can ask me later how I learned to say that without something but I was living in the ashram for about a week and every day I would go to meet them because Swami Atmas Rupananda and his daughter they had their own private quarter and I went there doing an open time, I think it was between two and three where anyone can come in and to talk to them, have some tea or whatever and I was like a really hungry student, always really like learning and figuring things out and I was definitely on a quest and on a journey then and so I was sitting there with them through that hour and I just had so many questions and I was so interested to learn from their wisdom and I really liked them too, they were both very humble and knowledgeable and also what's interesting is that Swami Atmas Rupananda from what I know of he used to be a very successful businessman back in Canada but then from what I remember of the story he realized that he's not happy he had like big huge house by the beach or something like that and lots of money and everything but he realized he's not happy and I think that's when he met his teacher a famous monk known as Swami Chidamanda who was the direct student of Swami Sivananda the famous saint of Vrishikesh, long story short the soon to be Atmas Rupananda met Chidamanda also a really cool spiritual teacher I liked his teachings when I used to read them so I think he got so impressed that eventually he dropped everything dropped his business, moved to India and became a monk and then later on some years later his daughter followed and they both became monks so interesting story but when I was spending time with them and talking to them the funny part is that for after that hour finished there was so much we had to talk about like I was so interested to hear I did like question myself like is that okay? I'm like looking at the clock I'm like the time is finished but I could see that Swami Atmas Rupananda was just so engaged in the conversation that he there wouldn't be a sense that I need to go and I think I even like asked like should I maybe go? It's like no no fine fine just stay stay and we just kept talking for hours and started at two and at five he used to go by the Ganga the famous sacred river which is in the middle of Rishikesh and there was like a pathway where he would walk back and forth to do his exercise to make sure he's moving and when the time came to do that he's like you know what let's go together let's walk with me let's take a walk together and then we would walk back and forth together and talk and talk and eventually after that ended around 6pm then I'd be like okay well this was great but there's limits to everything I need to be respectful of their space and eventually that was the end of the conversation but then the next day we did that again I think we did it for like three days in a row and now as we continue let me check if the video is doing well and the video is doing well and let me check the audio and the audio is doing well so we can continue it's a life of a YouTuber because if you don't press a button to record audio or video you end up talking forever and they realize you just wasted it all because nothing recorded and coffee gives you more energy to have a good talk so let's continue now but interestingly enough that's not the part of the story that is a part of the story that I want to tell you but that's not the specific moment which this episode is about the episode which I'm specifically I want to point you to is when we were having those conversations with Swami Atmosvananda and with his daughter they mentioned that there's this well known spiritual teacher Swami Muktananda whose I think he was Canadian as well and he apparently became like enlightened when he was in India in the same ashram and he he then moved back to Canada and got a whole falling of people and once in a year or twice anyway he would come with a bunch of his students to the ashram and he would kind of live with them and give special teachings and show them around and I heard like stories that he's kind of an interesting personality well first of all I hope I'm going to find a video on Google if I do if I did you're seeing it now through the magic of editing and so he's an impressive guy in terms of physique because he is a black gentleman big and tall and just huge he actually looked a little bit like Swami Sivananda I guess because I heard stories and you can see that Swami Sivananda was also big on dark skin so maybe that made an impression on people as well but it's just kind of you know it's like I don't want to focus too much on the looks but definitely that made an impression you see him and you're like oh that's a big dude and then he's wearing the special monks outfit so that there was that impression and I was suggested that I should just go talk to him or actually not necessarily talk to him but to go to his teachings like evening teachings where they sing as well but long story and I decided I felt intrigued I was like oh that sounds interesting you know that sounds I'd like to meet him and I went to the evening teachings like I think it was like from 8 p.m. to 9 p.m. and I was sitting there with another westerner from the ashram who was visiting the ashram as well and we got to know each other and when the teachings ended I think the guy that I was spending time with who I was sitting next to he was like you know what go and ask I think I maybe had a question about whatever he said Swami Muktananda and the person I was hanging out with told me like no just go ahead go to Muktananda and just ask your question and I'm like really is that okay like I'm not going to bother him just do it and I decided you know what I'm going to go and do it and I walked him and whenever I had a chance to speak because obviously he was surrounded by a bunch of people I asked him that question I don't remember what that question is always but obviously he liked the question and he looked at me he's like walk with me you said that specifically and he'll I say that very specifically because that phrase you'll see was repeated a few times but then that night he's like walk with me and I'm like okay and then we started walking through the hallway like leaving the room and we talked and we continued talking and talking pretty much all about enlightenment and what enlightenment is and what does it mean to become enlightened and that was a big subject to me at the day and we went eventually outside took a walk around the area of the ashram funny part is that the dorms where I was living in the ashram they give you a room I knew that it's closing and locking down at 10 p.m. but our talk had kept going and I didn't want to break the flow and so I'm looking at the climb and I'm like oh this is past 10 I'm in trouble but then we continued talking about until 10 30 kept on it was kind of cool because you know kind of those moody moments because it was dark and I think it was like full moon or bright enough moon you know there's no like artificial light just the light of the moonlight and we just talked and talked about enlightenment but there was a moment there where I recognized that he considers himself enlightened or I think I think that was the case and but the thing is I made a video already about that like it's called enlightenment is not what you think or I break this down in detail so feel free to watch that video of my thought is going to sound too controversial for you but the message of it was and is that anyone can have that mind expansive state that experience of the expansive state of your consciousness or you recognize that you're not the body and I worked my ass off to experience that and to get that realization which some people call enlightenment and I break down like why I think this it's not as big as people stay or think in that video so if you're interested in that subject just go watch that video there's a link here somewhere in the corner but but not to go stray at that day I was humble about it but I realized and I believed with certainty that I went through that experience and I know what enlightenment is and so but his idea one of the thoughts he said is that a young person cannot become enlightened like that like you have to have at least a certain age which is kind of weird now that I look back because I think he was like in his mid 30s he looked youngish but maybe like 35 I don't know most 40 years so but that was kind of an interesting idea and I got confused because he's an authority and I thought maybe I'm wrong but I'm like I read when I had that experience of expansive consciousness afterwards I started understanding all the scriptures that I was reading and it was clear that I'm like I know what this is about but then he told me you know you can't I didn't tell him like I'm enlightened man but I just was conflict about what he said because he pointed out that I was like 20 then and he pointed out that you can't be enlightened if you're 20 and I'm like well that's kind of weird so does that mean I don't know what I've been talking about is that mean I my experience is fake and kind of that was almost the end of the conversation and that kept me thinking now a funny story is I come back to the dorms it's closed it's locked I can't get in anymore I think the guards just shoot me away so I went next to the house of Swami Admasurpananda I was spending my days with and I just found a bench there and I just said I'm gonna sleep here and I spent some time it got cold it got really cold it was like autumn but at night it got cold and so I went to a public bathroom and there's kind of a big one so like the section of the toilet was further down and I just laid down there and tried to get some sleep until 4 am because that's when Swami Admasurpananda gave his morning teachings I'm sorry I keep scratching I'm just so itchy can't do anything about it this is the one take video I'll do my best not to scratch anyway so he gave a teaching at 4 am and as soon as that hit I went to the teaching I meditated and they started but it's a funny moment because that's something I do sometimes say if I go to visit someone as a guest and they're like oh I hope this bed is not too small or this room is clean enough and I like to make that joke and say well you know what I once slept in a public bathroom in India so it's never probably gonna get worse than that so that's actually when it happened how it happened but then the first night that I spent time with Muktananda he invited me the next day to go with his students I think that's what happened to a sacred ashram somewhere in another city nearby and I thought okay that's cool you know I should do that and I didn't think much of it but I went there and I hung out with his students a bit and then I was walking around that ashram and obviously all of his students kind of how spirituality and that whole culture works obviously his students were just always following him and asking him questions you know they were just like they were in love with him and I could see that he wasn't always enthusiastic about that I could see that from his body language but I didn't want to bug him myself because you know like his students want his attention and that's fine with me but so I was not looking for him but then I went to the square of the ashram and he was sitting there on the bench a couple of his students sitting next to him and he saw me and he looked at me and was like you know come here sit with me you know he had this kind of deep voice and I was like sure man okay and I sat down and we talked again like for 30 minutes or 45 and but then I thought about his idea of a young person cannot get enlightened and I kept digesting is he right or is he right and I'm wrong or the other way around and then I as I was contemplating that I remembered that back in the day I read so much about spirituality I was just completely lost in it and I one of the greatest saints of the previous century is considered to be oh the name just left my head but I'll remember it though Ramana Maharshi was considered to be the saint of the previous century the greatest saint beforehand it was I'm going to forget that one he's a cool dude I really liked him he worshiped Kali the goddess of destruction I believe huh and it's been a long time since I spoke about that stuff anyway Ramana Maharshi so Ramana Maharshi the his biography story is that he got enlightened when he was 14 I believe and just by accident he was holding his best he was interested in scriptures sacred scriptures but he was holding his breath because he was afraid to die from supplicating and he decided to challenge himself and he decided to hold his breath until the very last moment he couldn't and then the brain switched his mind expanded and he got enlightened and later he became recognized as the enlightened guy and there's a whole story about him I won't go to detail there too much but he's like really recognized like big time and he got enlightened when he was 14 and as we were discussing with Muktananda I told him like what about Ramana Maharshi I'm like you're saying that you cannot get enlightened if you're young but then Ramana Maharshi he got enlightened when he was 14 and she's like oh well Ramana Maharshi is a special case and I'm not like trying to make fun of him he's like just kind of how he talked and I actually like that and he's like a one in a million you know cases the very special case I'm like well that means you can become enlightened when you're young right and he's like I guess but you have to be like super special like okay well that's a downer for me I guess because then that that's like I'm not super special I guess but then still I was like but shit that doesn't make sense but then that's that was the end of conversation then we went to the bus again came back and I didn't see him that day and I thought that because I was confused I was like damn I really invested in this I really think I know what I'm talking about but this guy says I can't because I'm too young and so what's right what's wrong and then I took a book which I actually spoke about in one of my recent one take videos actually the very first one I mentioned Bhagavad Gita a famous short segment of a sacred book which I kind of liked it made a big impression on me it's about Arjuna the prince to Krishna as they were heading to war and he had to fight members of his family and he didn't want to and then Krishna revealed himself to be God and they had a conversation like kind of an interesting deep one philosophical and by the end of that ride and that book Arjuna the prince he realizes Krishna is right and he decides to shed away all his doubts and there's a moment where he says I can't quote exactly right now I can't remember all the words but basically he says it's like now I see the truth and I have no more doubts like you know my doubts are drawn or whatever and that I read that quote because I was like looking for answers and I read the book I kept carrying it with me all the way everywhere and I kept reading it and I read again and I read that segment really that last segment and I read that quote you know I don't have any more doubts and it just resonated with me and I was like shit you know it's like I shouldn't have doubts like I know what I know I know this is true I know this is real whatever it's not a belief it's just a deep knowing and whatever Muktananda says even if he's famous established whatever it doesn't matter I know what I know I shouldn't have doubts and that kind of made me settled I went to bed I slept really you know calm and nice that sold all my doubts and I thought you know what and I knew Muktananda is leaving the next day and I thought like maybe I should go see bye but I was like you know what I'm done I know what I know I don't need his recognition I don't need you know him saying that I'm right and I just took it easy and I was walking out of the ushram just randomly can't remember where I was going and that's how life works sometimes especially in India freaky stuff like that happened in India for some reason and I meet him just like randomly on the stairs and he sees me he smiles and he's like Walk with New Yorkers and I'm like okay man and then we continue talking and and we're walking and we're going to his car and he's like you know drive with me and then we drive to the place where the final bus of him leaving is is is going to part and I know he's leaving like in 30 minutes or something but I see his group next to the bus gathering and we're sitting there a bit further together next to some building and just the two of us like peaceful quiet we're looking into nature wasn't I getting at one of those beautiful moments and let me check I know this is intriguing but let me check the yeah the audio is still good so we're sitting there and we started talking on like I'm confident you know I know what I know and I'm not trying to prove him wrong or anything so we're just talking and and he's sharing a story he started sharing a story with me and or I think yeah I think for some reason what I came up to say to him is I think I was leading the conversation to kind of make my point and I told him one of my favorite phrases which I introduced in one of my previous wanting videos I told him do you know that the Buddha said that doubt is the greatest sin and it's like a great I wasn't like trying to prove anything I just share that phrase which I really resonated with and as I said it's one of my favorite phrases I used to read and I like that concept that the way I express it is that you can decide and you can consider is this better is this worse but you shouldn't be in doubt doubt is something else doubt is that undecisiveness doubtful undecisiveness is not and so that broke down to the phrase of doubt is the greatest sin for me and I told him that phrase about Buddha from Buddha and he's like oh I like this phrase and then he started to reflect about it and he told me the story of how a guy goes through forest or jungle and suddenly he feels for some reason he should make a step and he looks under his foot before he made a step and there's a snail and he realizes there's an intelligence great intelligence that guides him not to hurt and it was nice story but then he finished saying that story and I looked at him and I said he's like I can't remember what exactly brought that to that moment I looked at him and I said you know what I choose not to doubt and I was just sitting with such decisive confidence was just like in my voice I just like and zero arrogance was just like a statement I was like you know what I choose not to doubt and he's like saw his eyes widen up and he liked it you know he's like and that kind of ended all our arguments because he knew that I'm talking about you know early enlightenment early understanding or capturing enlightenment and I was referring to that I was like I choose not to doubt and he's like took a break he took a pause and he's like I like you bro because I looked at him was like I was in that moment I was like I love you too smiley you know like I love you too man and I literally said I love you is like oh yeah so again he got surprised but he liked it and that was it that was like that was it now that I remember it's crazy that was like the time he had to leave and it just all went into that moment and he essentially spoke said that story so I guess I'm getting a bit emotional but yeah so I think we just sat there maybe in silence for a few more moments and we just I don't even remember what happened after do we say bye or did we hug don't remember but then he I think I wanted to hug him but I didn't know if he can hug a monk I'm not sure to this day like an Indian monk but then he he went to his bus and that was it and I was 20 now I'm 30 so it's 10 years ago and I never saw him again I never looked him up I maybe looked him up like online to see like you know see I saw you wrote a book or something so hopefully I found him and you saw a picture of him maybe I'll leave a link to his book or whatever but that was it never had any more contact never heard about him anymore I just knew some people who knew him but that was it but yeah that was really that was a really powerful moment for me because and I'm wrapping this episode in a moment but because I went to India after my experience in Switzerland of living in an Aikido yoga meditation school and I went to India for a month to travel and to kind of settle in before because I knew the next step was coming back to Lithuania my home country and to open my Aikido school and I was like only 20 years old well now let me let me think about that back now I was 21 or 22 anyway so that was on the moment of me coming back to before coming back to Lithuania to establish myself in the sense that I know what I'm talking about and I can be an instructor and it was a challenging thing because I was like only in my early 20s and I was about to open a school and have adults kids too but adults coming to my teachings and to my classes and I had to be the authority figure and part of me was a bit freaking out I was like shoot you know how I make them believe that I know my stuff being so young especially in Lithuania you know we were still a bit more hyped about older means better but then so I wanted to kind of find my ground in India to know that I know my stuff and that moment just gave me so much confidence I realized in that moment that I do not need another person's permission I do not need another person's acknowledgement about because I deeply know to be true and that was a wonderful moment in story and I felt like it was almost like I don't like to point out at such moments too much as you know that's the way universe works but it did feel like that was one of those moments where it was a gift from life it was like meant to be so yeah crazy I guess back then my life was like that full of spookiality and mystical shit and what not and so I guess I took it for granted I was like oh this is like every that happens to everyone for now as I'm pretty and I've been through all kinds of stuff and I experienced both sides of life the you know the earthly realm as much as the spiritual realm I kind of realized that actually you know that's a special story that's like doesn't happen to everyone and doesn't happen every day it didn't happen to me again and yet again I have some cool stories to share with you in the future I hope you like this one comments what you think about it what did you take from this story like what did you what was the moment for you like oh I like that idea this is going to take away from this video let me know in the comments and I'm thrilled to hear but yeah more stories are going to come thank you for listening and I hope it was valuable for you and until next time keep questioning