 Today I have a very special guest and we're going to be talking about how to deal with some negativity that's coming our way. Yeah. Oh, everybody, this is Chris from the Rewired Soul where we talk about the problem but focus on the solution. And today I am joined by a very special guest. Go ahead and introduce yourself. Hi guys. I'm Alyssa. I'm the channel Illimation. Yeah. Yeah. That you didn't know. She was coming on the channel. So yeah, a lot of you are here on my channel from my videos about her videos. So I kind of wanted to talk about a few things if that's cool. Yes. So I just hit 100,000 subscribers. Did you know about that? I knew about that. She knew about that. If you were following me on Twitter, you would know too. All right. But yeah, Illi, from doing your series, did you get some negative comments coming in? Very passionate. And I'm getting a bunch of negative comments now. People are trying to expose me or whatnot. So I wanted to ask you about some of the comments that you get and how you dealt with them. Let me ask you this first. Yeah. Like with your series about the X and everything like why did you want to make that into a series? Like what was your motivation behind that? Because let me frame it like this. Yeah. Because I'm an added believer that sharing your story is a very powerful way to help people. It's even therapeutic for us. I share a lot about my story and my past. So I just want to know like what was your thought process and like I'm going to make this into a series. Well, my thought process began with like I first of all thought no one would watch it for one because it just looks like a downer. Like if it was like recommended next to like 2 million Orbeez in your bathtub and this girl gets abused for like 15 minutes, I'm making like a light of it because I'm able to joke about it now. But like, yeah, I just thought it'd be a downer. I didn't think people would watch it, but then I figured like if anybody did, I want to insert this vocabulary and these concepts that I wish I know or the things that I learned along the way. The thing is to drawing it out to so many parts, which is a matter of when I started to write it all down, I was like 15 pages in and I mean the videos themselves are already so long and there is a lot that I like chose not to talk about because I I'm not ready to talk about. But yeah, so it's just a matter of like, I guess this will be a three part series. This was I mean, I started writing it like I want to say around that it might have been like I totally will like say out there like it probably was somewhat I was definitely at least subconsciously inspired by like, you know, what Shane Dawson does not with conspiracy videos, not with Jake Paul. That was before all of it. And you can check the time when he met his dad. Yeah. I loved when he did a series of Molly Burke and it didn't and it wasn't like whatever part one of three, it was just like these are just standalone videos where you just kind of go on this little journey with someone. And I was like, that's really nice. And it like that's not something you really see on YouTube is someone's kind of journey. It was really it was really journalistic, which is nothing like I did. That was more what I did when I met Holly and Kit. Yeah, it's like we get a we get a that's why I said in the video, like Shane Dawson style, we just go out there and see what we find. Yeah. But as for the scripted stuff, yeah, it was just running so long. And I was like, this has to be multi part. And what was hard was definitely finding a place to end it in a way that didn't come off as like, he's a little cliffhanger because it's like, of course, it's going to be a cliffhanger because I'm ending a story in the middle of it and picking it back up later. But I still want to make sure to have some kind of like, the way to end it and then two separate things to talk about. So yeah, they did a great job. Let me ask you this. I don't know if you addressed it. Yeah. I follow you everywhere, but. I follow you everywhere. Yes, like when when she likes my tweets, I'm like, oh, she knows me. Oh, but he knows me. You were going to do a part three. You did part two and a half. Is there a reason like you didn't do part three? Did you just feel like you you had the closure? You had a good ending place? Like, like what was that? So I know a lot of people have been asking and I doing this to respond when I see that comes up is part three was going to be some kind of like it was it was honestly going to be really immoral of me to go about and that's why I decided against it. I some part three would have just been me detailing more manipulative things he did to me, but things that were very ridiculous and would be me pretty much shaming him. Yeah, which is like, I know that's the kind of content people would live for. And that's how I could that's how I could get views. I know if I put that out. I know people want to know all these like pretty much embarrassing stories about my ex is what it would be. And I was like, I know I talked to somebody and they were like, hey, that's not right. And they were like, look, I know he was awful to you, but that's still like that's where it comes in with even though someone did something awful to me. The last thing I should be doing is throwing that back on them. And, you know, talking about how they hurt me is one thing. But to go around and say this person know what they do when they're alone? This, what do you think about that internet? When I have all these people who follow me, these people who very passionately want to say awful things about this person and have your own opinions. But the last thing I want to do is just send negativity out to a million people. There was no there were no morals in that video. There was nothing. There were no vocabulary terms. It was just me. It wouldn't have been me absolutely milking it, which was gross. I decided not doing it. Yeah. And I love to see sometimes you just connect with people. And like, this is this is it. Like something that I try to teach all of you out there is to check your motives. Check. Yeah. That's how it was it. So something that I do with my channel, obviously, is I pull topics from the community to try to, like you said, to teach a lesson to see what can we learn from this and stuff? Well, sometimes another YouTuber just pisses me off. Right. And I'm just like, you know what? I'm going to make this video. I'm going to talk about how they might be a sociopath or a narcissistic. You know, just do that, right? And then I'm just like, what's my motivation behind that? Like, what? Like that's that is not the message I want to be sending out. That is not the purpose of my channel and stuff. So that's awesome. Whoever told you that, you're not a good friend on your side. I've got a lot of good friends. And I think that's the one very redeemable thing about the YouTube community is that people people know, like, hey, don't do that. You know, they can see that not see into the future. But they go, that's going to look bad. Yeah. And to have any friend that just says, I know where you're coming from and you're really passionate. I love your energy. Don't do that. Yeah. Have that friend. And just like imagining, like me picturing it, like meeting sweet little Ellie here, just imagining just putting that hatred out, you know, the whole, like, that's all it would be image would change, especially with this whole cancel culture thing going around. And nobody got time for that. No, but like with this stuff going on. So let's talk about the comments. And this is this is one that I want I know that you get. And it's something that I I need help with. Yes. But people saying, like, you're so you just told me your motives behind making your video, the ones that you did release, people saying that you were making up that story to get views. I know I was getting that a lot. And I put out like a little tweet. And I remember you had like featured in a video, too. It was like it was one of those like screenshot thing in your iPhone notes pads. It was too big to type out on Twitter. But yeah, it's pretty much like, I mean, if it's not entertaining enough for you, I'm sorry if this isn't what you think a victim looks like. I'm so sorry. But I hope that if my story doesn't stuck up to what you think a victim of this kind of thing should be, I really hope you're out there supporting the people you do believe. I really hope that you don't look at my story and go, this is why I don't believe people, which really sucks. And I'm sorry if I'm putting out that kind of look. But the thing is, too, if no matter what I tell you or other people tell you, if you don't believe anyone, that's a you problem, first of all. And then secondly, even if it is fake, you can still learn that thing or two about, you know, fictitious stories of, I mean, what the three little pigs, what do you learn from that? Yeah. What do we learn from that? Don't blow down houses. Don't blow down houses. I don't know. That was a bad example. There's the ugly duckling. What do you learn from that? Be like, was there really a duck out there that looked like that? OK, maybe I didn't see it. It's not likely. I don't see ducks like that. It's like, OK, it's fine. Yeah. Did you learn something, though? Because there's a bunch of vocabulary there. Like, well, and that's that's what I like. And it's crazy because part of my channel is just trying to find the similarities. And obviously, like, I like my story is different. Yeah. I haven't had anybody tell me I'm lying about my story. But they tell me that, oh, you're not really a mental health channel. You're a drama channel. Just trying to disguise yourself as a mental health channel, right? Well, really, I'm a mental health channel disguised myself as a drama channel. You know, but it like gets me like, I get like, like frustrated. And let me ask you this, too, because I love me a good disclaimer. I love putting disclaimers to cover my butt. And I thought what you did was genius. But like, when I do disclaimers, when you did what was it, like the devil's advocate character, like, people just acted like it wasn't even there. Like, so you put you were mocking people who you knew were going to say certain things. And they still said they still said it, which is like, how do I deal with that? How do I deal? Like, when I say I'm not diagnosing anybody. Yeah. Well, first of all, you consulting your therapist as I do, too, they'll have the best advice. But what I've when it comes to like, it pretty much just comes down to like, you said your piece, you did your best. And what I'm always trying to keep in mind, this will circle back. What other people tell me something, I take their word for it. I don't sit back and worry that, oh, my God, what if they're just being fake with me? Because if they are, their actions will reveal it later. What they said, take their word for it. They said it, take their word for it. And the same fruit goes for yourself. You know, something's going to roll into something and you're trying to just like, okay, I'm going to be preventative. I'm going to be cautious. I'm going to do this and I know, I know what my motives are. And if you go into it like that and people are saying all these other things, I mean, you know, like, oh, actually, you're doing it for this. Actually, you're not, you're fake, you're fake. Then, of course, step back and go, okay, did I lie to myself about my motives? But if you find that you're not lying to yourself about your motives, you know who you are, take your own word for it. Yeah, it's so it's a lot of mind games. But that's something that I struggle with because I know what my motives are. I know they are like what they are. But like if like, you know, imposter syndrome comes up and stuff like you start questioning yourself. Yeah. Like, is that something that you've dealt with with all of the just negativity? I want to talk about the positive too. So yeah, but like when the negativity was coming out, did you start to question yourself and ask yourself, did I do this for the wrong reasons? Did I, you know, was I really trying to get a message out there? Was I trying to tell people what to look for? What to, you know, like, did you question it? I did question it because it really made me step back and realize the unintended consequences of doing any video on YouTube, because it's not up to you who watches it. Just because you put a video out on YouTube doesn't mean everyone in the world is going to watch it. It could mean a hundred people watch it or 10 million people watch it. But that's not up to you. Yeah. And that's what really sucks because if anything, you're even more out of control, but still, you know, recognizing that what everyone else is saying, the things they're taking away that aren't what you're intending, it's out of your control. And as long as you aren't, you know, pushing negative ideals, then as long as you're doing the best you can do to put out the best positive message, realize your unintended consequences as I have, because I know people are trying to find this person, which I beg you to not, because all you're going to do is get yourself in trouble. And I don't think people realize that. Yeah. All you're going to do is get yourself in trouble. And that's all where I'm going to leave it. I'm not going to come after you. The police might. Yeah. But that's because you went out and harassed someone. Again, up to you to go and spread that negativity. Yeah, exactly. Up to you. And I'm sure many people are coming from a good place, but just, just don't. It's like you think that's the thing. That's where intention and result can differ. If you intend, that's what I think about too is like, if you intend, it's like when someone like accidentally hurts your feelings and they're like, well, I didn't mean to. And it's like, okay, but what you did was still hurtful. I think that kind of conversation has been coming up a lot more with like diversity and issues and all over. And you go, okay, well, I didn't mean to and I'm sorry. And it's like, okay, but you're not getting it. You didn't mean to. That's great. That makes me feel better, but you still did something that was hurtful. Yeah. And so sometimes that can help in the forgiving process. Yeah. So something that you just brought up, like about the unintended consequences of your videos. Yeah. Like for me, I just did a video with Donna from Psych IRL. Shout out to you, Donna. I talked about how like making this channel and taking it where I wanted to take it and get mental health is more of like a conversation. Like I kind of knew. I kind of knew that there might be some controversy. I knew that people would come at me or a tiny like I kind of knew. So like what you did was amazing. And that's one of the reasons why I covered it. Like, I don't know if I ever told you this, but it was somebody in our discord server and they're like, they're like, Chris, you got to check out this Illimation video. And I'm like, I don't watch no animation channels. I'm a grown man. And I watch them like, what? Anyways, like, so when you put it out there, like, you know, what your, you know, motors were to help people and stuff. And then those unintended consequences, like you did something great. You did something amazing. I know that my audience and my comment that I got, you helped so many people. So what did you learn from it? Because I would never recommend that you never talk about any of this stuff. Like, well, like that part of it, but like if there's anything else that comes up in the future, like you're helping people. So there are unintended consequences, but where do you find that balance? Like, okay, some people are going to be put off by this, but it's helping people more worth it. That's kind of what I should know. I know what it comes down to is when you go into it, I know there was going to be some kind of conversation for sure. And I won't deny that because I know the kind of topic I'm covering. That's why I put in that little devil's advocate character because I know even if only a hundred people watched it, one of the comments is going to be like that. And it needed an answer and it can come from, sorry, I'm going to like double, double-tie these questions. Do your thing, do your thing. And yeah, it's like, I know if anyone watches this video, they're going to have certain questions, they might come from a good place, they might come from a bad place, but I benefit of the doubt that coming from a good place because if I answer this question, you know, as I did in my videos, that helps people more, especially if all of this is a misunderstanding. So there's that. So I try not to go into things, guns blazing anymore. I know I have in the past because things get to me crazy. Things bother me. Wow. Who would have thought? Right? Who would have thought? But and then yeah, sometimes I see a comment that just really bothers me. And the thing is that I always regret engaging because it doesn't ever reflect on that person. Because honestly, if someone's active, active fool, acting like an idiot, if you just step back and let him act like an idiot enough, other people will notice. And that's the thing I've noticed. And yeah. Do you notice on your comment section, people police each other? Yeah, I've just been starting to like step back because I get this urge like I need to tell this person. I need to tell them off. And if I just wait and I go back to that comment. Somebody did it for you. Yeah. People do it for me. And by the way, although these are two you know, I want you all to think about that when you're on Twitter and stuff like something that I talk about is I have to ask myself three questions when I pause. Does it need to be said? Does it need to be said right now? And does it need to be said by me? And like my ego says, yes, you need to say it. I need to say this one thing to honor. Right. But yeah, I've noticed when I when I take a step back, especially with the collabs I've been doing, like some people like, oh, no, I can't believe you're collabing with that guy. And then like I sit there and like my fans will come and say, actually, Chris never said that. Oh, actually, did you watch the video? Or she actually explained it. Did you watch? And yeah, it's yeah. That's all it comes down to. It's like you can let things sit, especially if it's some kind of FAQ. Yeah. Because it's like you and another thing is you are not entitled to someone else's time. That's the biggest thing I've learned with being with an ex. You're not in time. They are not entitled to your response. That's something that I'm really trying to work on. Yeah. It's just I think it's just a matter of like and I know you said off camera. We were talking about this too. Like you're like sometimes people when you do engage, it works out and people go, I'm so sorry. I was just not in a good place and I was taking my anger out. And maybe you step back to and go, I did that too. And I'm very sorry. And step away like cool. But yeah. And you just and you never know. And like, yeah, I try not to like it's it's something that I'm still working on. That's something I try to pre-tell my channel is like, I'm not perfect. I'm going on this journey with a lot of you out there. I'm just a guy with a camera and something that I'm trying to work on too because I do believe in having adult conversations when there's misunderstandings and stuff like that. But like something I'm working on is like stepping back and going, OK, this is, you know, this person isn't changing. I'm not changing. Let's make our ways or we both apologize or both. Yeah. So the last the last topic on the kind of negative aspect because I want to jump in the positive is I find myself wanting to stick up for other people. And I know something that you covered very well, very, very well in your second episode was about your parents. Yeah. Like how have you coped with people saying things about where your parents should have done? And first of all, I haven't seen those comments because little known fact about me when I post a video and I think others can attest to this too. When I post a video, I only look at the comments for the first kind of day that it's up. I'm working on that. I work on that for sure. It'll save you so much stress because when your videos start hitting recommended traffic and it's being watched by people who are not subscribed to you, they don't know you. They don't know your motives. They don't know what you stand for. They're going to come in with all of these other perceptions, whether they're good or bad about you. And obviously they're not on your side. And if and then to they're not they might not be as open to listening to you. So that's why it's like I'd rather engage with people who are subscribed to me and that's why they're seeing the video first before it gets any bigger or smaller. Like I try to watch I try to like go into my comment section before the video is at like a hundred K because then I know these are people who are subscribed to me. They're seeing it in their inbox and they're watching and they're commenting and there are people I know for sure who ask genuine questions of my subscribers totally. There are out of so many people, people have genuine questions and I do try to respond. So, but I think that's the biggest thing is like, so sorry, back to my parents. I don't know what those comments are. Kind of don't know. I won't tell you. Yeah, that's another thing too is like I think the top of this works with any kind of situation is it's like, you know, your friend is going through something bad. You want to help them. The last thing you should really do is say, hey, so one of our friends said this about you. Let me think about that. Because you know the answer to that. So I've asked my friends like, hey, stop sending me hate videos. Because I know it's a thing like, oh my God, like they're saying awful things about you. You should know this. And I'm like, actually that just makes me sad. Yeah, let me tell all of you. I'm saying this about my friend who doesn't even watch my videos, but he manages to find every hate thing about me and send it to them like, you just stop like, I'll be having a great day. Yes, me too. I was, oh my God, I was, by the way, I'm 21. And I don't talk about it on my channel yet, but I drink alcohol. What? What? And I go out with my friends sometimes. But yeah, there are times where I've gone out with my friends. I'm having a great time. Oh my God. Drink responsibly. I was having a great time at Chili's. And then I see my phone pop up and I'm like, someone messaged me. Click and they're like, look at this hate video. And I sobered up so quick, let me tell you. Oh my God. So if you're a friend of somebody, not even those YouTubers, like you don't always have to do that and like show them, like we think that we're like being this honorable friend and saying, I'm by the way to answer your question about the question. No, you didn't even have a question. But to answer the topic about your parents, let me tell you that you covered it in your video. I did. You did. It's like, I don't need to go looking for more questions that I already have the answers to. And neither do you. I need to ask you this. So I've, I'm always trying to learn, especially now that I've hit this new kind of level of YouTube dumb. I'm trying to learn from you creators who are bigger than me. Exactly what I did too. I was always asking other people for advice. And here's my struggle. Like it makes sense to check on this in the first 24 hours. Yeah. They're kind of back away. But I've prided myself from the very beginning on staying very connected with my audience. So I mentioned this in a video the other day when I started getting a lot of hate. I was like, you guys, I got to stay out of the comments. And it bumps me out because my loyal people who comment and maybe didn't catch my video for a day or two later, I'm worried that they won't get a response or just even a heart. So how do you, because like, I want to, this is a team effort between us, the creator, them, the audience. What do you recommend? Here's a theory and let me know if this is working for you. Your real fans follow you on Twitter and Instagram. That's it. It takes like, I only get nice things in my DMs, which I do read. I just don't have time to respond. And sometimes when I go to my DMs, it crashes. Yeah, ditto, ditto. Yeah, it's like, and I do, I'm still trying to figure out good ways for interaction. Thankfully, I'm going to conventions without help. But. You've been doing live streams though. Been doing live streams. And that's a thing too. Live streams don't go into recommended traffic. Therefore, only your subscribers are there for that. And if your subscribers are there for you, they're there for you. Kind of like that's, and that was deep, I swear. Yeah. That was some Jaden Smith. Jaden Smith. That was a Jaden Smith tweet, but I swear I was onto something. So yeah, maybe because I definitely see you as like an advice and self-health kind of channel. I know a lot of people are like, you don't have a degree. And it's like, didn't say I did. Show me what I did. But still, I almost see it almost like a dear avi, but videos every day. So I think maybe if you're into it, you could start a thing, you could start an email. Because it takes a lot of effort. It takes, it's really easy to just type a comment, but just say like, hi, check the description. Not all people read the description. There's a lot in my descriptions and pinned comments that nobody knows about. And I know it's a lot of information, but that's a thing. So people are like, I really, really need help. Like, I need help. Yeah, sure. I'll go to this. Copy the little email. If you have like a, maybe an email set up like, help me chris at gmail.com. I like that. But you've provided a lot of resources in your description too. I've taken your resources and put them in mine because I'm like, oh, she already did the work. So I don't gotta look at it. I did this too. So everybody, this is a lesson that anybody watching this video read the dang description. It's so helpful. Like no, a lot of people are like, what do I do? How do I know if someone's abusing me? And every now and then when I get a lot of people like really coming up in my DMs, I'll make a story on my Instagram saying go to loveisrespect.org. That's where I saw things. And while I was in my bad relationship and it all started clicking, because that's the thing. Sometimes you do need someone to talk to you, but sometimes you just need to see the card card, the cold hard facts. Yeah. And a lot of it is also helping yourself. So do that for yourself. You deserve it. Yes. Yes. Exactly. And speaking of that, like now switch into the positive stuff. Positive stuff. Cause I try to encourage people to share their story. What are some maybe like stand out things from like your videos like other women or even men reaching out to you about like thanking you. So many. So like I said, I do read my DMs. Very occasionally do I respond? Cause the thing is like once the DM is open, you can't really close it. And then I feel bad cause it's kind of, it's establishing communication, but it's communication that I can't always go back and respond to. Ditto. So it's opening up the pathway, which is great. Cause I want to be able to respond to people, but then if I have like a million DMs going, then it's like, oh no, now like 20 people want to like need to talk, need to talk to someone at once. And I can't be that like, that's why I always say, if you can talk to a therapist, totally talk to a therapist. Anyway, but yeah, there have been people in community relationships, there are people who are like, oh my God, I'm married and I went through that. And I just was so afraid to tell my significant other, but I finally did. And now they're like going to counseling together, which might sound like a step back, but I swear to God to step forward. Cause someone who is ready to go like, this awful thing happened to me and I'm so afraid to tell you. And for them to go, oh my God, I love you even more for trusting me with this. Yeah, and then other things start to make sense, especially in a relationship. Especially, there are people too, like I'm happy to see guys coming to me too. Cause I was really afraid and I would alienate the audience and make it sound like it only happens to girls. Cause like, cause I, as I said in my second part, my second part with consent, I said, boy or girl, young or old, you need consent is everything. And so thankfully I have seen, you know, some men coming forward in my DMs and saying like, hey, I'm gay, but this still happens to me, but I still felt, you know, heard. Or like, I was again, able to talk to myself for another, I was able to see a therapist now, just, I don't know. And I'm always afraid of like, actually saying this stuff out loud because I don't want people to make it seem like I'm like fueling my ego. Yeah, me too. I'm just happy to like see other people go, hey, thanks for doing this, you helped me. Cause I feel like all of us have had that moment where we've emailed the fan account to like panic at the disco and said like, I love your music, it really helps me. And people mean that. Like they mean it so much. And they deserve that like, thank you. And it's like, no, like you thank me, but no, thank you. Thank you for taking those steps. Yeah, and it encourages people like us to keep doing it. Did you second guess yourself about opening up about this story and then like, did it validate why you did it when you started getting those people? The hate comments, at no point did the hate comments make me regret everything fully. If anything, it made me regret not being clear enough and not shooting for clarity, especially with these kinds of very heavy and serious topics. So when I would hate comments, it wouldn't make me go, oh no, I shouldn't have said anything because I know where that led me in my relationship. The whole point was that I never asked for help. And on top of that, I never told anybody about it or I totally told my friend. And then from there, I didn't tell the police. When I did tell the police, I didn't speak up about let me speak to your supervisor. And I totally regret that. And when people call that out, I feel awful. But I also know it just goes back to me having a problem with not speaking up. Yeah, and it's definitely hard to, as a YouTuber, I know it's hard to cover everything. You can't. And you're an animator, so like. I don't even care, I got a lot to do. Yeah, like, I just sit in front of this camera and I'm like, okay, make this video like 10 to 15 minutes. People are gonna watch past that. We're like doing this. I don't even know if you guys are still watching. But like. Drop a comment. Yeah. I'm still here. Drop, I'm still here if you're still here. Yeah. I like, I asked, like, I have to decide like how much am I going to include in this. Yeah. You know, and then, but I have like 800 videos. So chances are I talked about it somewhere else. But yeah. So that's a common struggle that we do that. So last couple things I wanna talk about real quick. So you don't, you didn't look around looking for hate videos. And this is gonna lead into a second question. But how did you feel coming across my videos about you and what was, what was that like? What was your initial response? Cause I'm now meeting creators who I've made videos about. So how did that happen? I was terrified because yeah, it was, it was along. It was the same people who were saying, look at this hate video. Look at this hate video. Look at this hate video. And they go, look at this video. And I'm like, I don't trust your recommendations. Jesus. Right. But then enough other friends kept saying, look at this video. I think my mom sent me your video. Oh really? I know my boyfriend Chris was like, hey, this is actually a nice video. And then other, like other fellow creators were like, yeah, it's actually a nice video. You should watch it. And I was like, is it a nice video in that he's nicely saying mean thing? Yeah. I'm not gonna fall into that trap either. And I, and again, always like, I'm gonna choose what kind of negativity I'm gonna allow for myself. And I have, you know, I have things to do. I'm not gonna just stop whatever I'm doing and go watch a video that could make me sad. Yeah. So, but I double checked with everyone. I was like, is this a mean video? I told you not to send me these mean videos. I double checked and they were like, no, no, no, it's good. It's nice. You should watch it. And it's not me saying like, I only want, I don't want criticism. It's me saying, critique my animation, but don't tell me I'm a liar. That's very different. That's not criticism. That's mean, regardless. So yeah, when I watched it, my heart was going. And I was like, oh no, what's he gonna say? Like my big angry voice was like, oh this guy yelling at me. And I know you've talked about in a separate video is like clickbait. And it's like, their clickbait actually is the correct term to use for the way you set up these videos because you want to grab the meanies and make them learn something. Yeah. That's it. Yeah. So you did that. Like, yes, the video is doing well. Oh yeah, that's what they did. I mean, like, there's a reason people title videos to things because we know what would go through our mind if we saw it. Yeah. And so you grabbed a general audience because it's people who are, yeah, I know you got a lot of my fans are like, I thought this was gonna be me. And a lot of people were like, man, I thought this was gonna validate me, but I found out I'm the mean one. Yeah, exactly. So anyway, regardless. So yeah, I was like, here we go. And then I watched it and I was like, oh, and then I learned a few things. Yeah. Like when I learned a thing or two. So let me ask you this, because now I'm gonna have you fluff up my video. So me not being a licensed professional, like that meant a lot to me that you learned a few things. And like, so, I don't know, did you question like what I was talking about when I talked about psychology or anything like that? Or like when I was trying to explain things. I know I checked the description and you're about to see if you had any credentials. And I was like, okay, well, he didn't learn this in a classroom, but that doesn't invalidate what he's saying is factual and what you're saying is vocabulary from someone else. Yeah. And it's just, it's like, I don't know, I just see it as like, you know, my videos. I didn't say I was a therapist, but like, I'm talking about these topics. So I'm going to bring in people who do know what they're talking about in the form of, you know, outside resources and information. Yeah. And I'm going to make sure it supports the message I'm putting out, of course, too. Yeah. So that's all I did. I was like, okay, well, he's not just throwing around some terms he made up on his own. I checked the resources, I'm like, I'm learning. Yeah. Yeah, and that's all I did. Learning is fun. And so, yeah, again, that's why I see you as like a self-help advice channel, kind of like Anna Akana. She's not a psychologist or therapist. She's amazing. Yeah, I love her stuff. And so it's like, yeah, and also like, tell me why I said I was a psychologist. Yeah, exactly. So the last thing I want to ask you because I'm trying to learn. Yeah. So I have a 50-50 chance because as you know, I pull creative stuff and I use it for my videos. You responded to it very well. Like, there were some people who like leave comments and they're just like, thanks, but she already explained it the first time, you know, or whatever. You don't need me. I'm not going to be the crisp, but other creators, they don't like me using them as an example. Like, just as a friend now, why do you think that is? Because I always think just perception is fascinating. Two people can see the same thing or look at the same thing, see two different things. Like you said in your one video about the, I think you covered that in the thumbnail video. Yeah. She watches my stuff. I watched it. I didn't remember. But like, why do you think that? Sometimes it's okay and sometimes it's not. I mean, I think it's, if you come down to anything, I know part of it is just, I guess just straight up and transparently when a bigger creator sees you using their name, in some ways they're like, they're using me for clout. And that's where it takes, okay, look into the video and see what they're talking about. And again, all of this is still like everyone's opinion. So it could be their opinion that they're like, like, well, I watched the video and yep, I believe he is still using me for clout. And again, that's where it goes back to intention versus result. Your intention isn't to use, I hope it isn't to just use their name and just like throw it all on the tags and be like, I hope I get famous now. Make me famous YouTube. It doesn't seem that way. But I don't know. That's a lot of people- She just met me. I just met you. I don't know. That's a lot of people assume. And so it's like, well, your intention wasn't there, but if the result is that someone feels hurt, then it's like, well, I didn't do that right. The way that you did it with me, it's like, I don't know. I felt like you understood where I was coming from. I felt like you understood my situation even though you didn't go through it, of course. I'm just me and you're just you. And so that's why I felt validated by your video. But I can see how some people, yeah, and I'm not gonna say who because it all just comes down to like, what I'm learning too is like, if it doesn't involve me, I'm not gonna give my opinion on it because that's how you get into drama, which I think goes against your channel. But also, I mean, you're going at it from an advice standpoint. So that's, I mean, I don't know. I think those hate comments in order to satisfy, I'm not hate comments, but honestly just feedback even from the creators themselves. You'd have to kind of step back at your content and figure out another way to go about it. Yeah, yeah, that's what I'm trying to figure out. Cause before we recorded, Nellie and I were talking about like views, like getting views, like no creator, nobody ever makes a YouTube account and upload something to not get views, even if they're just sharing it with their family. And like, that's where my struggle of this next level is because I made hundreds of videos that just weren't getting that many views. But what were you doing it for? Were you doing it going, this one's gonna blow up and I'm gonna be famous? No, no, but it's, yeah, exactly. It's just I wanna help people, but if nobody sees it, I can't help anybody, you know? So it's a tricky situation, but with stuff like this and meeting other people, like now I'm able to use the cloud to teach people and educate people. Well, that's the thing, it's like, when you're, yeah, that's what I think where it comes back to like the click baity thing. It's like, if you're click baiting, it better be for good reason. Like Shane Dawson in his Molly Burke series, he was like, switching lives with a blind person, which is like, oh, click, right? And then you watch it and then you learn about, oh my God, I learned so much about how the world is not made for disabled people. And then after that, watching that video, I was looking for like, like I remember I would go to a stoplight and for the crosswalk and Molly was saying like, yeah, sometimes they don't make the little beep noise. So I don't know when to cross. I just have to listen for cars and hope I don't get hit by a car. Yeah. Yeah. And so, yeah, that's an example where, yeah, it's click bait. Yeah, he's using like, Molly Burke is blind. I'm gonna live her life for a day. Like, oh, click bait. And then turns it into, y'all are gonna learn something. You're here, I'm gonna make you learn something. I'm gonna make you empathetic. I'm gonna make you, I'm gonna spend your time wisely. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, exactly. And that's something that I'm just, you know, trying to learn is that, you know, there are people who are very appreciative of that. Like, like people who, like, like your fans who came in like, I was ready to attack you for discrediting illy, but I learned something and now I'm subscribing, you know, so, so yeah, but not everybody like we were talking about earlier, not every pass or through is at that place where they wanna get educated. You know what I mean? Yeah, and then I know like too, if you're making a video about someone that's already like just seeing a thumbnail with your face in it on a video that you did not make, like I think for anyone, it's just like, oh God, this is the beginning of some kind of cancel whoever. Yeah, that's what I've been going through lately. I'm like, okay, let's see how much, you know, this is good, so. So I would just say for your sake, your reputation and also just for the goal of getting along with as many people as you can, always make sure to like, as you do with me, just make sure you're understanding all sides as you can. Yeah, I'm just, I'm not gonna name names because I appreciate all the creators you've talked about, especially recently. And yeah, and so I don't want to take your waters. I love them all too and wish them all the best and hope that someday I can become friends with everybody. I think too, it's coming from a place of like, especially if someone makes a video and you're saying, here's what they did wrong. Nobody ever will ever feel comfortable with the stranger coming up to them saying, guess who you did wrong yesterday. No one wants that. And it's not a matter of like, you're just not ready to get educated. It's a matter of like, we got it, we got it. Yeah, unsolicited advice, yeah, exactly. So because of this thing, you're an advice channel. And it's, the whole thing is like, if your video's in the recommended, someone clicks on it, that's unsolicited advice right there. Yeah. So I'm working on it, I'm learning, I'm growing. But anyways, we're gonna do another video, but thank you so much for this video. And make sure you subscribe to Ellie. I'm gonna have all her links in the description. We told you to check the link. Check the description. And what's easier to do than checking the description is just to subscribe to the rewire install because there's a big button. Yeah, same big one, and a bell. Do you have anything cool going on that you wanna announce to everybody before? Yeah, I'll be doing my first convention. I don't know if I'll be on any panels. I don't know if I'm doing it immediately. Which one? I'll be going to Playlist Live in Orlando. I just got my ticket to Playlist Live. I wanna play in the slide. I wanna see you put a slide. I'll go to Playlist Live, it's March 1st to the 3rd in Orlando. And I think their ticket's still available. I know every now and then on Twitter, their account does like these little giveaways. They throw a bunch of codes up. Yeah, yeah, I just saw that. It's possible, you can go too. Wow, see both of us. Yeah, see both of us. How do you feel, like do you want people to come up and say hi? Yeah, please say hi. Yeah, say hi to me too. This is my first time to, and doing anything. Yeah. So please say hi. Cool. Hopefully, we'll both see you in Orlando. All right, thanks for watching everybody. Bye.