 Dedicated to the strength of the nation, proudly we hail Captain Fable, the United States Army and United States Air Force presentation. Now here is our producer, the well-known Hollywood showman, C.P. McGregor. Thank you, thank you, and readings from Hollywood, ladies and gentlemen. Welcome to your Theatre of Stars, where your own favorites from the world's cinema capital join us for your entertainment. Our star is beautiful and talented, Vivian Blaine, and the title of our play, A Manhattan Fable. This is a behind-the-scenes story of a young married couple who win the jackpot prize on a radio giveaway show, a story of what happens after the prize is won. I know, too, you'll enjoy Vivian in songs with special lyrics written for her. And now, we're about ready for Act I of A Manhattan Fable. Here for a moment is Wendell Niles with an important message for you. The men of the United States Army and the United States Air Force have a job to do for themselves and for you. That job is preserving the peace. There will be great satisfaction for them and for you when it can be said that they have done that job. When the time-honored words, mission accomplished, can be spoken at last. Under all circumstances, we must give them the support they deserve. Here again at the microphone, our producer. The curtain rises on Act I of our delightful musical, A Manhattan Fable starring Vivian Blaine as Beverly with Ben Gage as Johnny. This is a fable of old Manhattan. Once upon a time, in this far away land, there lived a prince and princess. Their palace, such as it was, was high in a deep forest of brownstone tenements. And each evening, the prince would come home on his snow-white coach to his lady-love, the princess. And sometimes he was quite tired. Oh, you're early. Did you drive your milk truck home? Yeah, I was too exhausted to fight the subway. Well, be sure to tell Officer Kelly that you'll be parking there all night. Yeah, I'll tell her. What's the matter, honey? Oh, I don't know. I'm just... I'm slightly weary tonight. Now, Johnny... That's a lot of things, I suppose. Ran clear out of homogenize today. Had to go way back to the plan. You poor dude. Yeah, but that isn't all. Life for us is so confusing. Like running out of homogenize? Well, yeah, that and then the rush and the hurry and the compression of things. When the day is over, you apply yourself into a subway. If you're lucky, then you come home to this. After all, Johnny, I do try to keep our home clean for you. Oh, no, no, not that bad. But our home is so insignificant, so small, why a self-respecting pay telephone would sneer at this flat of ours. You are tired. Yeah, look what we see out there. What a gorgeous view. Officer Kelly's Long Johns. It's Monday, dear. You don't have to tell me. Look, Johnny. Yes, dear. Now listen to me a minute, will you? Okay. I've been thinking. I've been giving things an awful lot of thought lately. And you know what? What? We ought to take off somewhere. Get lost. Get away from it all for a while. Hey, that sounds good. Oh, it's what we both need, Johnny. A change of scene. Quiet. The space you wanted. And no more homogenize. Sure. Come on, Johnny. Johnny, we've just got to do it. Okay. Let's take a boat to Bermuda, huh? It's a wonderful idea. Let's take a plane to St. Paul. Okay. Let's take a kayak to Quincy or Nye. Let's get away from it all. Let's take a trip and a trailer. No need to come back at all. Let's take a powder to Boston for Chowder. Let's get away from it all. We'll travel wrong every day. Love you, sweet. In all of 48. Oh, I love that, ma'am. Let's go again to Niagara. Yeah, but this time to look at the fall. See what you mean. Let's leave our dear. Get out of. Let's get away. Oh, wouldn't it, though? Oh, but then vacations pass by so quickly. Two weeks and they're gone. And then two vacations cost loot, you know, ma'am. You're very right, Johnny. But I felt very lucky lately. For some reason or other, I... Hey, it's a telephone. Just a minute. I'll get it. Which is in rattlesnake gulch. And did you know that the announcer on task at the Arpeggio is going along? Yeah, I suppose the sponsor wants to get some publicity pictures. Probably so. Oh, golly, I can't wait to see their ad. Whatever you do, don't let me forget the saddle, so. Okay. Folks, how do you like it? Densolid. Yes. Oh, but what privacy you have here. Nearest thing, living and breathing is a beaver dam 90 miles away. Come on, I'll show you the place. Okay. Oak floors, steel sash windows, beautiful brand new oil furnace. That's wonderful. Yes, indeed. Everything is first class. Let's get some pictures, boys, of the Browns in their new home. Honey, my hair fixed. Thank you. Now, this way, folks. There's your backyard. Oh, thank you. Yeah, it goes clear to those hills back there. Besides being beautiful, those hills contain the world's finest specimen of wild mountain lion. You like to hunt Mrs. Brown? What a silly question. There's nothing I'd rather do than finish the dishes and go hunt a mountain lion. Yeah, this is the place for you. Boys, a picture of the Browns looking out over the terrain toward the hill. Got it. That'll be a nice picture. Thanks, boys. Now, this way, folks. Here's your barn and your corral. Everything is first class. Oh, yes. Here's your livestock. Isn't she sweet? We'll call her Gertrude. Do you want to take a picture of us with Gertrude? Oh, definitely not. Why? Well, a subsidiary corporation of ours processes goat's milk. We certainly would not desire to take pictures of a competitor. Oh, I see. Sounds like it. Yes. Say, oh, here's your hired man, Jed, coming from the barn. Jed! This is Mr. and Mrs. Brown. Harry Vokes. Hello, Jed. Hello, Jed. What am I? What an unusual name for a hired man, Jed. Brother, I've been here about three years. It's an unusual name, too. Hank. Hmm. Well, Jed will help you out. I think I'll be running along. Well, all I can say is good luck. Thanks. Thank you. Bye. Well, here we are. Yes. Here we are. I couldn't help over here in Blackmouth who just left, seeing everything was first class. Well, isn't it? It is. We overlooked the fact that the roof leaks, plumbing's out of order, the house needs a thorough cleaning. Hey, stop. Well, that's enough. I think we'd all better get to work here. Yes. Yes, I think we should. Oh, well, at least after slaving all day, we can sit down for a minute here in the porch. Oh, my. It does feel good to sit down. Oh, it needed cleaning so badly. Yeah, Bev. You know, I'd suggest a game of honeymoon bridge, but I don't think I could lift a deck of cards. Give it a thought, darling. I'm afraid I haven't the strength to deal with them. By the way, where's Jed? Oh, he went into town to get some prospecting equipment. He said he'd like to do a little prospecting in a spare time. What spare time? But that's what I asked. Mm-hmm. Just a client. No. No, that other sound. Where? Listen. Hey, there is something. Of course there is. Hey, it's coming this way. Maybe it's a mountain liner or a grizzly bearer. We'd do something, darling. Hey, give me my rifle. Hey, give me my 30-odd six. Here it is. Oh, quick, Johnny. Quick. A good thing it wasn't a grizzly bear. You missed her. Well, I checked myself at the last moment, sensing a friend. Mm-hmm. Oh, Johnny. What? I don't know, Johnny. I just don't know. I don't know either. We've only been here one day, and you know what? Sure. I'm homesick. I am too. Oh, give me a home where the taxis all roam, where you'll never find any blue jeans. Person can hark down to old Central Park. Maximity to the taw. Reach from our government. The man in the front office is the pilot of the United States Air Force fighter, bomber or transport. And it's possible you can be one of those young men with wings. You see, if you are between the ages of 20 and 26 and 1 half, unmarried, with two years of college, or the ability to pass an equivalent examination and physically fit, you have the basic qualifications that may enable you to become an aviation cadet. If you qualify, you'll receive a full year's training, and then those pilot's wings and a commission in the Air Force Reserve as a second lieutenant, plus orders to active duty at once with beginning pay up to $336 per month. Outstanding graduates will receive regular commissions in the Air Force. Others can win regular commissions while on their tour of active duty. For full details, visit your nearest Air Force base or recruiting station at once. The curtain rises on Act 2 of the Manhattan Fable, starring Vivian Blaine as Beverly. Well, let's go on with the fable of all Manhattan. It seems that our handsome prince and his beautiful princes do not like the kingdom which they have inherited. But being courageous and valiant, they want to make the kingdom prosper. It seems that they've even spent the last of their crown jewels to accomplish it. Hello, dear. Well, here's our last five bucks. Our last five dollars? Yep, this pitchfork and this shovel. I just bought them in town. Well, why the shovel? Well, Jed wanted it first prospecting. Besides, if we're going to do something with this place, you know, plant things and see them grow, we at least need a shovel. Well, I guess so. By the way, have you talked to Jed about planting? Oh, no, let's go talk to him now. All right. Jed, what's holding us up? Why can't we get our crop in? Why can't we get our cropping? Because we ain't got no water this way. Oh, aren't there any streams around, or lakes? Streams, lakes. Ain't even no wells. No prospecting ones. That's why I want to go prospecting. Johnny. What? It seems to me I read somewhere about a man who could take a branch, run it over the ground, and find water. Of course, Bev. You mean a douser. Oh, is that what they call him? Yeah. And they call the whole business dousing. You've heard of it, haven't you, Jed? Heard of it. Son, I originated it. You did? Well, sure. Worked quietly to perfect it. It's all in getting the right fork twig. It is. Yep. Well, when I finally got the right twig, we downed Chicago away. Worked one night. Yes. Oh, no. You don't say. Yep. Then moved west. Somebody wanted sea-line water. Yeah. The Great Salt Lake. Gee, you're really terrific, aren't you? Well, that's when I made my mistake. Oh? Yep. Went out to California, held my twig up in the air. Yeah. And you know what's been happening there ever since. Oh, no. Well, tell them, Jed, if that's the case, why don't you help us out here? Well, I don't know whether I still have my touch or not, but I'm game if you are. Good. All right, I'll go look up a twig with a fork in it. Gee, this is swell, isn't it, Johnny? Yeah, but you know, sometimes I think Jed exaggerates a little bit. Oh, I don't know what would ever make you think a thing like that. Well, he said he only worked one night on Lake Michigan. That's right. Now, listen, before I go to all the trouble of putting down a well, I'm going to find out if Jed really is an expert at dowsing. Well, how, Johnny? Well, it's easy now. I'll hide a glass of water in that juniper bush with it. Look, you'd better hurry. He started back this way. Jed, any response from the twig? He's as quiet as a certain hand. Gee, and we're right by the juniper bush. So we are. Hey, just a minute. Hey. It's moving. It sure enough is. He's a point in the way. He's a point in the way. Hey, this is wonderful. There's water right in this juniper bush, right in it. Who's pranking who around here? Well, no, I just... Who slipped a wet Mickey into this bush? Well, Jed, I... Who put this glass in here? What? Who's trying to sabotage this project? I'm the guilty one, Jed. You? Hey, I'm sorry. I just wanted to find out if you really knew how to do this. Are you satisfied now, Bob? Honest, Jed. I'm sorry I did it. You ought to be. Hey, where are you going, honey? I'm going to get the ice cubes. What ice cubes? The ones I planted by the pine trees. Oh, no. Fine, honey, do. Glass of water, ice cubes. Now, please forgive us, Jed. Well, I don't know why I should, but I will. Well... Well, hey, shall we continue our dousing? I suppose so. What a addictive pull on a fella. Like pouring glue on the hands of a country pianist and saying, play pretty. Oh, please forgive us now, Jed. Oh, I'll forgive you. But where did the tweak, Willie? Just a minute. It's flitting again. It's sorry, son. And believe me, this is a Lake Michigan flit if I ever saw one. Hey, well, where shall we start digging? Right here by the house. Okay. Now, you didn't plant no lemonade here, did you? Oh, no, no, no, I promise. She's close to the surface, too. She's a pickaxe under the surface, no more. Really? Sure. Give me that pickaxe. Give her one sweep. Oh, yeah, but it's black. She is a little tired. It's oil. It's oil. Oh, Don. Hey, what have we done? You've broken the tank for the oil furnace. Oh, well, try again. Lake Michigan. Head the same field as I understood it. Well, you should at least continue your search. Uh, folks, uh, one thing I forgot to tell you. What's that, Jed? I've already been dousing this place for the previous owners 70 times. I'm afraid there ain't so much as an eyedropper full of water and a whole ranch. Wait a minute, Jed. Does that mean that we can't grow anything? It sure does. I guess it even means we can't raise cattle. Yep. Ma'am, heifers have to have each tool at the rest of us. Well, I've had enough. Enough, Johnny? Yeah, I'm going to sell this place. I want to get back to New York anyway. Oh, selling the ranch is a wonderful idea. Why didn't we think of it before? Just a minute, son. I'm afraid you ain't going to have no luck selling this place. Oh, why not, Jed? No bank is interested that way. This is a white elephant. Well, the previous owner certainly sold it. Sure, but not like you think. You had to start that radio program, tack down the arpeggios on me, get rid of it. Oh, Johnny. But I still say there's a way out. Well, if there is, let's have it, Jed. I still maintain there's gold in them there hills, if you let me go get it. All right, Jed. Get your things together. Go ahead, Jed. Are you all set, Jed? Ready to go after them. Oh, where's your mule? Mule. Son, you're thinking back in the dark ages. Sure, Johnny. You go prospecting these days and you go first class. Right side won't tire, son. Well, anyway, Jed, good luck. Yes, Jed. Good luck. Thank you. I'll be seeing you. Johnny, do you think he will make a strike? Well, he'd better make a strike, or this story isn't going to have a payoff. Gee, I can't wait until he gets back. You miss me? No, I should say we have, Jed. Hey, we sure have, Jed. We've been waiting for you on pins and needles. Well, well, Johnny, let me be the first to offer sympathy. Sympathy. There ain't no gold on your property. No gold. There ain't no silver. No silver? There ain't even enough iron to make the head of a tin penny nail. But the joint is jumping with uranium ore. Uranium ore? You mean it? I mean it. I took along a geiger counter in my equipment. Oh, that's the instrument you used to find it, isn't it? That's it. But I'm going along and suddenly the indicator starts flicking around like a butcher's scale with top sirloin on it. And I say to myself, this is the real McCoy. Oh, Jed, you're wonderful. I agree. Well, right now I'm going to go check that dosing tweak. Still can't figure out how to do it. Oh, gee, Bill. Oh, Johnny, aren't we lucky? And we owe it all to that radio program. Yeah, we are lucky. Hey, we can get back to New York now. Oh, yes. I'm so lonesome to see the Calles and all the rest. Me too. You know, when you think about it, there was really nothing wrong with our ranch here in Wyoming or there was nothing wrong with our flat in New York. You know, what was wrong was us. How true, Donning, how true. It'll be nice to get home, though. To New York, that's where our friends are. And that's where we belong. We'll have a second honeymoon in our little telephone booth next door to the Calles. That's a promise. Oh, Johnny, won't it be wonderful? Oh, it sure will. Carry. Back to that city where they give so many keys. Back where the cops warble sweet in the springtime. Back where meps in the breeze. That's what we love. Just one more. One more secret. Carry me back to old. A return for a curtain call after this timely message from Wendell Niles. Attention, all officers of the organized reserve, National Guard and all former officers of World War II. The growing peacetime United States Army needs you. You former Army officers of World War II can apply at once for a reserve commission and three years of active duty. Your rank will be the rank you held immediately prior to processing for separation. As for age limits, 47 is the limit for field grade officers. A tour of active duty will increase your retirement pay benefits. There are today many chances if you're qualified for a competitive tours leading to regular commissions. Act at once while vacancies in the combat arms and the services still exist. Application blanks can be had at any United States Army and United States Air Force recruiting station or from any Army reserve or National Guard unit instructor. Here again is our star, Vivian Blaine and our producer. Vivian, I'm glad to hear from your husband manager, Manny Franks that we're going to have you with us here in Hollywood at least long enough to produce the story you discovered on your European tour, Carnival Girl. Manny is right, CP. I don't think I'll be touring again for quite a while, though everyone was very wonderful to us. You know, I lived out of a suitcase for almost a year and a half and I got pretty tired of it. That's long enough, even with all the success you had here and abroad. Tell us about Carnival Girl. Carnival Girl was written here. I mean in this country, but I saw the stage script while I was in London. I thought it was a grand play, so I decided right then and there to produce it myself for pictures. But you'll be in it too, won't you? Oh, yes. Yes, I am the Lady Bunker. Well, that's a new twist and a good one. We're looking for Carnival Girl. Thank you, CP. And now if I may, I'd like to pass along a compliment to Ben Gage for his very fine assistance. Ben, come join us. Well, thanks, CP. That was a swell performance, Ben. And by the way, since CP mentioned my husband, I'm sure that you are the talented husband of Esther Williams, as if everyone doesn't know it. I swim too, Vivian, but not as well as Esther in case she's listening. She's prettier than you, Ben, in case she is listening. Well, CP, how about getting Manny up here to the mic, huh? Manny, come rally around. This isn't quite in my line, CP. He's allergic to microphones, changes his pace, you know. Yeah, I know. How well I know what a mic does to you. But as a Hollywood manager, Manny's one of the best in the business. You know, sometimes I wish I were a talent manager, too. I know, so you could keep to 10% in the family. Now, that makes good sense to me. That's what I think. Well, at least we're all in agreement. Now, if we can just be in agreement a little on our opus here next week. Yes, CP, tell us what's scheduled next. Next week, Vivian and company, ladies and gentlemen, Barbara Britton, steps into our starring role in a play titled Barbara of Middlesbrough. This is a comedy romance of a college valedictorian who turns cover girl and finds her way into the glamorous profession of modeling through the simple process of discouraging a wolf. We'll be listening and thanks a million for everything. Goodbye, CP. So long, CP. Goodbye. Goodbye, Vivian, Ben and Matt. Be sure to join us next week, ladies and gentlemen, when we bring you Barbara Britton in Barbara of Middlesbrough. Until then, this is CP McGregor saying thanks for listening and Cheerio from Hollywood. Vivian Blaine appeared through the courtesy of the Hollywood board in the committee which arranges for the appearance of all stars on this program. Scripted by Rich Hall with music under the direction of Eddie Skravanik. This program is transcribed in Hollywood for release at this time. Wendell Niles speaking.