 Sev here reporting at the front of a local shopping centre on the verge of an outbreak, pandemic if you will of the coronavirus. People are stocking up outside of the shopping centre in fears that they're right out of toilet paper. Let's see what the locals have to say about this. So what happened? I have been the last three days going to different shops, three shops each day and there's no toilet paper. And whose house are you keeping tonight? Whose house? My house. Yeah, you're TPing your own house? No, my daughter rang me up and said mum if you go shopping can you get me some toilet paper because I'm running out. So you've tried to buy it online? Yeah we did on maybe Tuesday night and they cancelled it the next morning. And have you tried to purchase it from any other outlets? We've walked through during the day but it's always like empty so yeah. And what about BP stations and stuff like that? I never thought of that actually. So I've been on there this morning and I'm actually suggesting that some of our people go to the supermarkets, vote up the trolleys and stay there and wait for the elderly and individuals to come in. We're not there to buy it we're just going to make sure that it goes out fairly. I love that, I love that. Everybody's going in there's no violence yet which is a good sign. Everybody here is pretty civil about it. Are you here for some toilet paper? No. You have some toilet paper at home? Yeah. Are you wasting it? Yeah. Is your mum telling you to save it? A few people think that I'm some random tiktoker again. What's your name mate? James. How old are you mate? 12. You're in year seven now or? Yeah. And what do you reckon of all this dumb? And have you gotten some at home? Got some at home yeah. Whose house are you TPing tonight? Don't know haven't decided yet? Scenario. There is one more packet of toilet paper but it's on the top shelf and you can't reach it. What's your strategy? I plan the shelf. You have some supplies at home still? Ah yeah. Have you been careful with it? Yeah. Three ply, two ply or one ply? How thick is your toilet? One ply. Wow he's being very resourceful. Do you know the strategy for making three ply into one ply to save more toilet paper? They need to be taught this situation. We run out of toilet paper. Would you result to adult nappies? Wow. I'd revert to the shower maybe. There's somebody that started an anal wash business. Like enema. Did you know that nurses do that for free? Oh yes I know. Do you know the right ones? I've worked in the hospital for 30 years. Let's say you have one toilet paper pack left and it's on the top shelf. What do you do? I climb the shelf. I am on one knee and I'm still taller than her. God bless her. Have you prepared any cash for getting some back door supplies in case they run out? To bribe the workers? No. What about if there's one more packet left and it's on the top shelf and you can't reach it? What do you do? Can't get it. Can't get it? That's it. That's it. And what do you think about all of this commotion? I don't understand it actually. How long until the reckon it blows over? Like most things in Australia? A couple of weeks, hopefully. Have you got enough toilet paper in your house? Kind of. Are you worried? No, not really. What if you run out of toilet paper and you can't buy any toilet paper? What do you do? I don't know. What do you do? What are you doing? I don't know. Tissue. Tissues? What if there's no tissue? Paper towel. This is the hero we need. Not all heroes wear capes. Are these given away for free or are you going to raffle them off? No, you can have one. Excellent. Yep. The butcher always saves the day, mate. Here we go. We're going to give some. What's your business? Give us the plug. Meet Connoisseur, just the Woodvale Shopping Centre. I love it. I love it. What a lad. What a lad. Are you here for toilet paper, sir? No, mate. I'm here for my groceries. Nice. Nice. Excellent. You're here for toilet paper? Now, do you have any concealed weapons just in case things go down? No. Sev here, live out front of Woolworths in Woodvale. The doors are about to open. Kind residents are let me out the front. They have no idea that I'm actually going to grab toilet paper myself. The patrons are ready. The staff is ready. It's going to be a shit show, literally. Oh, there's some. There's some. Look at it all. Look at it all. The Kleenex, very popular brand. Obviously, the quilting there's more of because no one likes quilting. I might actually grab one myself and put it on eBay or Gumtree or something. Everybody in Woodvale seems to be a bit civilised, which is nice. Everyone knows that their limit is two packs. Got another happy customer walking away with a smile. The update here. Kleenex has just sold out that standard. No one really likes quilting, but times of desperation. We're going to go for quilting anyway. Some people are buying quilting for the first time. Not knowing. They'll get a big rash. Big, huge rash from quilting. Hey. Hey. You happy? Yes. Everyone's still pretty civilised. They're coming in, walking in. Yeah, again, quilting isn't the best brand. That's why it's only available. Some of these patrons are unaware that quilting will give you a severe rash on your bum, so they're all heading straight to the nappy aisle, straight after, for the powder. Hopefully they know that. It's been about five minutes since we've entered the store and we're about to sell out already. Everybody's taken their fair share, which is good. I got heaps. The country needs more heroes like her. How much can you pull in one week? You don't need four or five packs. She only needs one pack. And what about, how many kids do you have? Two. And do they pull a lot? Standard. Let's say they continue their cycle and months from now. There's no toilet paper. What do you do? Back to the stone age, mate. You can wipe it and wash your hands afterwards. So this lady here, we spoke to her earlier. She's helping out the people that were behind. From Marion Perth. She's got the system. She's like the backup eight minutes into the store opening and we've already sold out of the toilet paper. We've got one person who has stockpiled the trolley and she is giving away one item per customer. It's like a vigilante, but like in the best possible way. We gave free bits of toilet paper for the people that need them. We need more of those kids in the world. So that's it. Pretty uneventful in terms of how crazy other stores are doing it, but yeah, people are pretty civilized in the Woodvale area of Perth. Maybe the Monday people get a bit more desperate after the weekend, after a big weekend of grog and all the rest and see how they behave tomorrow. This is Sever, reporting from Channel Sever, going out.