 Your Coca-Cola bottler presents, Claudia, based on the famous play and novels by Rose Frankin. Brought to you transcribed Monday through Friday by your friendly neighbor who bottles Coca-Cola. Relax and while you're listening, refresh yourself. Have a Coke. And now, Claudia. Go away, Claudia. Leave me alone. Drink this hot tea, Mama. Come on, do you good? I don't want hot tea. Nobody cares what you want. Mrs. Brown, you have a cold. You have to have hot tea, too. The two go together, cup and lip. Having a cold used to be a very pleasant affair until you came along. I know, I know you hate being taken care of. You have a daughter and that is her one mission in life. Who says? I says, every child has to take care of her poor old mother and her old age. And what are you doing, practicing for that eventual day? Drink your tea, Mama. Would you like another blanket? I would not like anything except peace and quiet. You've been fussing over me all day, as if I had pneumonia or something. I don't even know how I let you talk me into getting back to bed. It wasn't very difficult. I wish you'd take your temperature. I don't have any. Then why are you afraid of taking it, if you don't have any? Claudia, go away. I'm sick. I want to be alone. You're sick. Since when are you sick? I just said that, so you... All right, give me the tea. Mama, you sneezed. Thank you for explaining to me. Um, how about hot water bottle, Mama? Claudia, will you stop fussing? You're going to catch my cold. Oh, no, I won't. How do you know? Can you prove a cold is contagious? Yes, I can also prove a cold is unpleasant, ornery, and people with colds ought to be left alone. I know you better than that. If I let you alone, Mrs. Brown, you'd start feeling persecuted and neglected. And you wouldn't drink your tea, either. Why don't you trance? Oh, dear. An electric pad, Mama. Two more words, and I'll ring your neck. I rarely think you want to catch this cold and pass it on to your son. Maybe that's what you have in mind. Bertha is taking care of Bobby, and I am taking care of you. I would be happy to exchange with Bobby. How's your tea, Mama? It's too hot to drink. Drink it hot. It's supposed to burn you. Force yourself. When I have a cold, you always tell me to drink it hot. No, I'm just getting even with you. That's all. Drink it, Mama. How's your head, better? Spinning. David, hello. Mama's head is spinning. I'll be right up to hold it down. I'm so glad you're home, David. I've been smothered with attention and browned in hot tea. I know you have a great deal to complain about poor things. The best years of my life nursing you through this cold. All I get is complaints, complaints, complaints. Claudia. Choo! Claudia, you sneezed. I did? Oh, well, what's a little sneeze? Everybody sneezes. Choo! Claudia, you sneezed. Oh. It's just the power of suggesting, Mama, I've been listening to you sneeze all day. Really doesn't mean a thing. And you do it, but when I do it, it does. Of course, you're my mother. I wonder why do people always have to pretend they don't like being lazy in bed. Sounds delicious to me. You hate bed, and so do I. You know, I don't think I'd mind it at all out of the day like this. Gosh, it certainly is dreary and cold and nasty out. Nope, I don't think I'd mind it at all. Oh. Choo! Claudia, you sneezed again. You're not feeling all right. I'm convinced. What convinces you? That you're wishing you were in bed. I didn't wish. Give me your cup. You said bed wouldn't be bad. That's all the convincing I need. Besides, your eyes look bright. That's good. Bright eyes is good. Not when it's a fever. Let me feel your hands. Go away. Go away. For it warm. My for it is my business. Then why isn't mine? Well, because you're sick in bed with a cold. A minute a person is sick in bed with a cold, therefore it is public domain. It just won't come. My nose is tickling. Put your finger under it. No, that doesn't work with me. Claudia, come over here. Will you please stop sounding so self-satisfied because I sneezed? Just as I thought. What? Your hands are icy. They aren't at all. Just because yours is so warm. Claudia, stop arguing with me. I know when your hands are icy or not. And I say yours are icy. So what's the difference that they are a little icy? It's winter. Everything else is icy. You'll go around lifting your eyebrows. Very funny. Now, listen to me. You pick yourself up and take yourself right out of here. And go put yourself to bed this instant and take your temperature. I am not three years old, Mama. You act as if you were. It's all your own fault hanging around me, having my cold and my private. Now go to bed before you get worse and pass it on to the rest of the household. You want David to be sick and Bobby? Well, it'll make you feel any better, Mrs. Brown. I will lock myself up in my room alone. With cotton and all the keyhole. And drink some hot tea. Would you please do it yourself? What? Who sneezed? We both sneezed. Both of you? She forced me to bed, David. You was brute-forced. But now she's. All I did is sneeze. Don't make a fuss, David. And her hands are icy. Put it to bed. This minute. Honestly, a woman doesn't have a chance around here. You're telling me. Come along, you. David, aren't you even going to ask Mama how she feels? I know how she feels. She feels as if she had a cold in the head. I feel fine. Well, you look awful. She takes great pleasure in calling people names. Claudia works under the theory that a good offense is the best defense. A plot? That's all. Like this, you'd be happy and scorned in bed. That was before I knew I was going there. Stop loitering. That's one of his favorite words, Mama. Loitering. Whenever he tries to be serious, he always starts talking about loitering. I'm going to count to ten. One, two, three. One, two, three. Bye, Mama. I'll just be in the next room in the next bed if you want anything. I won't end the thing. It won't be you. That means she loves me. Now, hurry up. Get yourself into some warm plantal pajamas and put the blankets under your chin. I'll get you a hot water bottle. David, I don't want a hot water bottle. You'll get what I want you to get, and that's final. Honestly. You know you're as bad as I am. David, I feel fine. I just simply sneezed. We're going to nip you in the bud. Oh, darling, I hate you having to come back from town and spend all your evening nursing me, especially when I don't need it. Well, if you're really concerned about me, you'll do as I tell you. That is the only reason I'm doing what you tell me, so you won't worry. All right, all right. Oh, if I have one, which I have one. You certainly have. David, please, I don't want you to fuss about anything. Now, stop running things. Take off your shoes. I am doing my best. I'll take off the bedspread for you. I must say, letting somebody think you're catching cold has its advantages. How's your head? Oh, it aches beautifully. I'll get you some aspirin. No, I hate taking pills. Now, hurry up. Get into those pajamas. You're having a wonderful time, aren't you? I just hope... Well, I just hope you don't catch my cold, too. Because you don't know how to take care of yourself when you're sick. The pot calling the kettle black. All right. I'm in my frown of pajamas. You certainly are. You're looking suspiciously like a bunny rabbit. Here. Here's the lollipop for you. David, I will not have my... Open your mouth. Don't bite the thermometer in two. Darling, I love you so, but... I didn't have this thermometer in my mouth. Don't talk with that thing in your mouth. I really tell you how much I love you. Now, shut up. That's David. Shut up. The bed feels good. I guess I'm catching cold as that. Little one, of course. I guess I didn't realize that I'm fussing over mama, but my bones do kind of ache. I'll be all right tomorrow. Sure you will. Now, give me the thermometer. Here. I have no fever. You have 102 tents. Well, that's no fever. It's over one degree. Well, silly old thermometer. Just doesn't know what it's saying. I'll get you the hot water bottle. It's in mama's room, darling. Don't let me catch you getting out of bed for anything. Not on your life. Mrs. Brown, how are you doing in here? I'm doing fine, Dr. Norton. I'm just making the rounds of my wards, checking up on my patients. Anything you need? She's getting cold all right. No question about it. Now, she's in bed. She admits she's glad she's there. That child she insisted on hovering around me all day. I can't blame her for that. Say, you mind if we borrow your hot water bottle? Not at all. I have the electric pad, too, if you want it. No, I think this will be fine. If you want anything, call me. I won't want anything. Claudia, I fetched you the hot water bottle. Stole it right out from under mama's feet, I did. Ooh, still sizzling. Poor David. Robbing Peter to pay Paul. Here, put it at Paul's feet, and I'll run downstairs and boil some more water. Oh, darling, you better tell Bertha that mama and I won't be down to dinner. All right. Two trays coming up. Huh? Huh? Huh? David, you sneezed. Was that David's sneezing? It was, mama. Huh? Huh? David, you sneezed again. You can't imagine sneezing. No, man can't sneeze without a reason. No, you lie still. You're the patient. Oh, David, darling, how are you feeling? You catching cold? Have you been sneezing all day? Come on, let me feel your forehead. Come here. That settles it. When a man sneezes three times, it's a cold. And when a woman sneezes... Three times is a cold. My David, look me in the eye and answer me. I will not. Are your hands cold? No. Oh, darling, you can't pull the wool over my head. I can tell when you're not feeling like you. Well, how can you tell? Because you don't act like you. Nothing can be clearer than that. And you have a circle under each eye. Well, that's where they belong. Not on you they don't. Mama, David has a cold, too. Mama, I do not. Tell him to get in the bed. You hear that, David? Get in the bed. I don't want to get in the bed. Be, David. God bless you, Mama. God bless you, Claudia. Ah! What we need is somebody around here without a cold. Well, there's Fritz. He's too busy to be of any use. And there's Bertha. Bertha. Just the woman to nurse me back to health. We'll have her cook us hot puddings. Hot puddings. And bring us hot water bottles. Hot water bottles. With hot bricks in it. Hot bricks in it. To keep our feet warm. Hot feet. And chicken soup. And noodles. Of course with noodles, Mrs. Brown. Mama, was that you? You've had a German accent. That sneeze takes the noodles out of the chicken soup. That sneeze reduces our sniffles to just being sniffles. Honestly, to think that Bertha would do this to us. It just goes to show you you can't trust anybody. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. Shoot! God bless us all. And a Gazintike for Bertha. When you pause to hear a radio program during the day, when the family gathers around to listen to an evening favorite, it's pleasant to have ice-cold Coca-Cola at hand. Or even the best of entertainment is more enjoyable when you listen refresh. Oh, David, David, before I leave, why don't you take yourself a mustard plaster? Take myself a what? Well, that's what my wife always says. You'll give Claudia ideas. Now go away, Joe. Go away with your mustard plaster. Besides, we'll all be in fine shape tomorrow. So quick? Sure, I'm feeling better already. Well, I hope you're right, David, about tomorrow. Why? What do you mean? Well, you'll need your health, you know, when the oil furnace loses its... Ah, nonsense. Now, our oil furnace is fine and so... Ah! Sure you are. God bless you, David. Every day, Monday through Friday, Claudia comes to you transcribed with the best wishes of your friendly neighbor who bottles Coca-Cola. So listen again tomorrow at the same time. And now this is Joe King saying, Au revoir. And remember, whoever you are, whatever you do, wherever you may be, when you think of refreshment, think of Coca-Cola. Or Coca-Cola makes any pause the pause that refreshes. And ice-cold Coca-Cola is everywhere. These broadcasts are adapted for radio from your star. And the entire production is supervised and directed by William Brown Maloney. And now here's a word from your friendly neighbor who bottles Coca-Cola.