 Mother, why did daddy switch to Postum? Your father says there's no caffeine in Postum. Nothing to spoil your sleep. And your father knows best. Yes, it's Father Knows Best transcribed in Hollywood starring Robert Young as father. A half hour visit with your neighbors, the Anderson's, brought to you by Instant Postum, the good tasting drink that's entirely caffeine free, and by Post 40% Brand Flakes, America's largest selling brand flakes. Well, it's about 2 a.m. and not a creature is stirring in the White Frame House on Maple Street. Not a creature is stirring at the moment anyway. It might be well to note at this point that the Anderson's are about to prove the words of a certain philosopher who said, sleep, riches, and health are only truly enjoyed after they've been interrupted. If you listen closely now, the chances are you will be able to hear the peaceful serenity of the night being disturbed by a small voice like this. Jim. Hmm? Jim, I think Kathy's calling you. What's that? What did you say? Daddy! Kathy's calling you. Ah. Now, let her see what she wants. She wants you. Dad! Better get up, Jim. Oh, all right. Probably wants a drink of water. I don't know why water becomes so fascinating in the middle of the night. There, she wants you now. Oh, Jim. Now, don't get back in bed. You're up now. Go see what she wants. Oh, all right. Ouch! Who left a shoe right in the middle of the floor? It's yours, dear. Oh. Daddy! I'm coming, kitten. Ah. Now, what's the trouble? Thirsty? No, but that's an idea. Oh, fine. Well, you'd better get back to sleep. I can't, Daddy. I just had a bad dream. And I'm afraid to go back to sleep. Well, you try anyway. There's nothing to be afraid of. We're all right here in the house with you. Can I have the light on? No, you can't sleep with the light on. Well, I'm kind of scared, Daddy. Please let me have the light on. Well, all right. There, is that better? That's better. All right. Now, you can see there's nothing to frighten you. So close your eyes now, honey. I'll try. Oh, Jeepers. What's going on? Nothing, Betty. Just go back to sleep. Well, turn that light off. I can't sleep with that thing glaring in my face. Daddy said I could have it on, didn't you, Daddy? Well, for a while. Kathy had a bad dream. I got scared. Well, I need to get some sleep. After all, tomorrow's a school day, you know. Well, I think if you just close your eyes, your educational career won't be completely ruined. Hey, what's going on in here? Well, go back to bed. I'm hungry. I'm thirsty. I'm sleepy. Father, will you please turn out the light? Dad, would you go down and get me an apple? Apple? Well, do you realize what time it is? I'd like it peeled and cut in fourths. Oh, sure. I'll dip it in pineapple juice and brown sugar for you. Oh, you don't need to do that, Dad. Just peel it. And make me a peanut butter sandwich, too. Look, son, you go back in bed. It's after two, and it'll soon be time for breakfast. You can wait till then. But, Dad, I'm hungry. Well, I'm not preparing any blue plate luncheons in the middle of the night for anyone. Isn't that clear? Oh, is anything wrong, dear? That's Kathy. She's all right. There's nothing wrong, Margaret. She just had a bad dream. She thinks she can't go to sleep. Can't we turn off this light? I'm scared to have it off. Maybe some post-em and warm milk would help her to get back to sleep. Peanut butter sandwich would help me. But I told you to go back to bed. Oh, OK. Holy cow. I think the warm post-em would be good, Jim. Why don't you run down and fix it, son? Oh, OK. Holy cow. Mother, can't you make her turn off the light? Where did I get to sleep again? Well, now, just tell me what the trouble is, Cat. Fine thing for a grown man to be doing. Warming milk in the middle of the night. Milk, milk. I don't even know where they... Hmm, what's this? Fried chicken. Hmm. You can't really get the true flavor of fried chicken until it gets cold. What are you eating, Dad? Hmm? Oh, but I thought I told you to get back to bed. Well, I did, but I couldn't get to sleep. You probably didn't even try. Yes, I did. I tried to think of something pleasant, but the only pleasant thing I could think of was food. In your case, I don't doubt that. Is that chicken? Uh-huh. I think there's some baked beans here in the refrigerator, too. Bud, you'd better get upstairs. You want some cold mashed potatoes, Dad? No. How about the beans? No, Bud. Maybe a few. Claude Mesner said when he lived in Altoona, Pennsylvania, he used to eat mashed potato sandwiches. Do you believe that? I believe anything of Claude, especially if it happened in Altoona. Daddy! Huh? Kitten, what are you doing? Where's my poster? Oh, well, I haven't quite got it ready. Where is it? It doesn't look to me like it's even started. Well, uh, maybe you could speed things up by getting the milk. I couldn't find it. Okay. Hey, chicken, can I have some? Well, you really ought to go to bed. Here's the neck. That's what I love. Kathy! Kathy, you don't stare. Don't tell her. She's down here, Mom. Ah, Tron blue. Kathy, you know better than to run around in your bare feet. Where are your slippers? They're all worn out. Almost. Well, I've told you time and again. My goodness, what's going on here? A banquet? Oh, uh, that's a little snack. A little snack? Looks like a layout for an elk's picnic. Want some chicken, Mommy? How can anybody get to sleep with all this racket going on down here? It sounds like a... What are you eating, bud? A baked bean and mashed potato sandwich. A what? A baked bean and mashed potato sandwich. Ugh, it sounds awful. It isn't very good. Maybe I shouldn't have used mustard. Mustard? I'll have to call Claude and ask him if he put mustard in his. Not tonight, you won't. Mother, was there any of that fruit salad left? I think there was, but we've got to get to bed. Sure, get out the whole works. As long as we're up, we might as well do it upright. Oh, Jim, it's after two o'clock. I know, but there's no law against this. At least I don't think there is. Sit down, Mother. I'll get everything on the table. Well, I see we've managed to awaken the Davises next door. Their kitchen light just went on. Now, what in the world are they doing up this time in the night? Haven't they any sense? For heaven's sakes, who's calling us up at this hour? Better not be Ralph. It's Mr. Davis. I can see Matt his phone over there. Kathy, get away from the window. Yes, yes, I'm coming. Hello. Oh, Jim, this is Ed Davis. Oh, hello, Ed. I don't like to be calling you like this, but my wife saw your lights over there and thought we ought to check to see if anything's wrong. No, nothing's wrong, Ed. Well, she was just a little worried. So I'll be down in the kitchen there. I thought maybe somebody was sick. No, no, no, no. We're all fine. Well, we just thought we heard a noise, and we got up to check. That's all. What kind of noise? Oh, I don't know. Nothing to it. Well, thanks for calling, Ed. You'd better get back to bed. Okay, good night. Good night. Oh, brother, talk about being snoopy. That Mrs. Davis has been watching every move we make. Probably could tell us exactly what we've got on. Mr. Davis sure looks funny in that old washed-out bathrobe. Let's see. He looks like a wrestler who just lost. Well, what'd they want, Jim? Wondering if somebody was sick? Yeah, more curiosity than anything else, I think. Holy cow, what's Mrs. Davis got on her head? A fright wig? But stop looking over there. She's just got her hair up in curlers. My stars, does she still use those old-fashioned curlers? Margaret, stop looking over there. Well, I wasn't really. But get away from the window. Can you pass me the chicken, please? What I want to know, Jim, is why did you tell him we heard noises? Well, I don't know. I just couldn't bring myself to tell him we were up eating dinner at 2 a.m. I think we were crazy. That's what they're doing now. What's that he's gnawing on, spare ribs? Children, I told you to get away from the window. Oh, there's Patty. She's up now. For goodness' sake, stop waving. Kathy, don't open that window. Huh? The heavens will wake up the whole neighborhood. Just a minute. Not. What are you thinking of, Kathy? Well, it was Patty's idea. Looks like Patty's been vetoed. Her mom is sure hustling her up to bed. Oh, let's see. Where are they? They're gone now. Oh, Father, the phone's going to ring in a second. Mr. Davis just picked up his phone. Well, you can tell him I've gone to bed, which I'm going to do right now. Well, that's what we're all going to do. Come on, children. Get away from the window and put everything away. Come on, Kathy, you come with me. Okay. Go on, shrimp boat. There's nothing more to see. Good night, Kathy. Good? Hmm, that's strange. What is, Father? Well, the phone doesn't ring. Now, who else could it be talking to this time of the night? Is he still on the phone? Looks like it. Hmm. Well, I'm not going to worry about it. That's his business. Come on, let's get upstairs. Get the light, bud. Okay. Well, now, who can that be? Ed again? It looked like he just dialed the phone. Hello? Hello, Jim. This is Ed. I hate to bother you again, but I was just talking to George. I was wondering who you were talking... I mean, you were? Yeah, he saw our lights on and called me to see if anything was wrong. I see. I told him we got up because you'd gotten up because you heard a prowler around your place. Prowler? But George wanted to know if you'd gotten a good look at the guy. No, no, we didn't see anything, Ed. As a matter of fact... Well, George thought he heard something over by his place earlier tonight and I figured somebody was trying to break in might be the same guy. No, I'm sure this was a different one. Uh, I mean... You know, not I think back. I believe I heard something a while ago, too. You think we ought to call the police? No, Ed. I'm sure it was nothing. Probably just a wind. Well, we better keep an eye peeled. Yeah, better do that. We better get some sleep, too. Okay. I will. Good night. Good night. Oh, brother, what imagination can do to some people. What'd he say, father? Oh, nothing really. Come on, let's get upstairs. Come on, bud. I'm coming. Betty, do you want the rest of this bean and potato sandwich? Oh, no. Who was that to call, dear? Oh, it was just Ed again. What do you want this time? Oh, their lights woke up George Phillips so Ed gave him a big story about us seeing a prowler. So then George was sure he'd heard one around his place. And then Ed imagined he'd heard something, too. You don't think they did hear something, do you? No, just build it up in their own minds. Yeah. Did you put the chicken away? Uh, yeah. Good night, father. Good night, princess. Good night, dad. Good night, bud. Margaret, did you hear that? Hear what? Shh. Listen. There, did you hear it? By George, there is a prowler down there. It's even close to moon-healthy Anderson's get to sleep tonight. Not while a prowler may be around loose. But speaking of sleep, here's a word from Mr. Sandman's best helper, Ed Prentice. Well, barring night prowlers and cold potato sandwiches at 2 a.m., I think I can give you just about the best guide ever to good sound sleep. You guessed it. I mean post-em, of course. Instant post-em. Yes, friend, if you have trouble getting to sleep or you can't get good restful sleep because of the caffeine in coffee or tea, switch to post-em. There's a mighty sound reason why. You see, post-em doesn't have any caffeine. No caffeine at all. And as you know, caffeine is a drug, a nerve stimulant. Now, of course, not everyone is bothered by caffeine, but if you are, if it makes you nervous and jittery, as well as robbing you of your sleep, take my advice. Switch to post-em. Give it a good try. Drink post-em exclusively for just 10 days and then see if you aren't sleeping better, looking better, feeling like a new person. Now do that for me, will you? Switch to good-tasting instant post-em and sleep. You like post-em. It has a good, vigorous flavor. That's really pleasing. What started out as an innocent little bad dream of Kathy's has now become a major neighborhood concern over a prowler in the night, imaginary or perhaps real. There were unexplained noises downstairs, and the head of the Anderson family, aided and abetted by sundry suggestions from the lesser members, is trying to figure out just how to cope with a problem. A hushed, tense sort of excitement is running high in the white frame house on Maple Street, at least in the upstairs half of it, as Father tries to keep the situation calmly under control, like this. Well, now everybody take it easy. Just don't get excited. Do you think he's got a machine gun, Daddy? No, kitten. Don't worry. Aw, shucks. He must have a gun of some kind. I doubt it. Now, the thing to do is work out a plan. Well, it seems to me the only sensible plan is call the police. Well, that's great. Call the police. Do you realize where our telephones are? They're both downstairs. Well, can't you sneak down there? I'm not going to run down like an idiot. Might have a gun. But you said... And you know how jumpy and nervous those inexperienced fellows are. Shoot before they know what they're doing. How do you know he's inexperienced? Well, I don't know, but there's no sense in taking a foolish risk. Hey, I know what to do, Daddy. Tear up a sheet and tie it together and hang it out the window and climb down it. Oh, fine. I saw them do that in a movie. He's probably got an accomplice waiting outside. I'd climb right down into his arms. Well, I don't want anybody tearing up my good sheets. They cost too much. Hey, I just remembered something Claude told me one time. That's all we need now. It happened in Altoona. Where else? They heard a robber in their house, and you know what his dad used to scare him away with? That's easy, a mashed potato sandwich. No, that wouldn't do it. Would me? What he used was just a wooden gun. Oh? Just an ordinary carved wooden gun. Well, if somebody will run down to the kitchen and get me a knife, I'll start carving a gun. Whoever goes down, I wish they'd get the rest of my sandwich. I'm getting hungry again. You know, I don't hear anything down there anymore. I think he's gone, if he was ever there in the first place. Oh, he was there, Mommy. I heard him. Well, I guess I'd better go down and check. See if he took anything. Yeah. You know, maybe the best thing to do is just go back to bed. After all, everything we've got is insured. Father, do you know what Ralph says? To tell the truth, Princess, right at this moment, what Ralph says doesn't seem too awfully important. Well, Ralph says you can dominate anyone you want through by sheer will of the mind. Well, good for Ralph. He says you can concentrate yourself into a position of superiority over any adversary if you have a strong mind. What's an adversary? Well, maybe you could try that, Father. Oh, sure. I don't know why I didn't think of that myself. Ralph says it works better if you have the other person sitting in a lower chair than yours. Well, that makes it even easier. There would be no trick at all to go down there and say, uh, how do you do, sir? Won't you have a low chair? What's an adversary? That's some kind of a bird. Oh, you're thinking of... You're thinking of cassowary. I thought a cassowary was a dish you're cooking. I never got my post, um, Daddy. Well, I don't think you need it right now. Jim, I'm going down there and see what's happening. No, Margaret, don't you go down. But I keep imagining I hear him getting into the good silver. And I just die if I lost any of that. It's all insured. But that belonged to my mother. And it just can't be replaced. Well... If you go down, Mommy, get my warm post, um... And the rest of my sandwich. Look, if anybody's going down, I am. Add up, boy, Dad. The sandwich is on the stove, I think. Try to dominate him with thought control, Father. I wouldn't think of trying anything else. Jim, if you're going down stairs, what are you doing in the closet? I'm looking for my pants. Well, why do you need those? Do you have to go formal? It's not that. It's just that... Well, a man can't go down in face of burglar and his pajamas. He may be right, Mother, psychologically. Ralph says you simply can't dominate if you have any feeling of inferiority. Margaret, why are those old tweed trousers of mine? Are you sure they're good enough? They're not pressed. All right. I'll just put on any old thing here. Shall I call down and ask him to wait while you dress? All right, Margaret. Dad, if the sandwich isn't on the stove, look on the window sill. Can I go with you, Daddy? No, kitten. It might be a good idea if Bud came along. He could carry the flashlight. I think I ought to get some sleep, Dad. By the way, where is the flashlight? Downstairs in the kitchen drawer. Oh, that's great. Well, here goes. You be careful now, Jim. I will. Dominate him, Father. Oh, sure. And be sure and check the silver. Maybe there's no one down there. It might be just the wind. Oh, no, he's down there. And he's seven feet tall. I think I saw a shadow. Oh, Kathy, stop it. You saw no such thing. Well, I sort of thought I did. Well, here goes. Be careful now. I will. Say, Margaret, where are my golf clubs? Golf clubs? What are you going to do now, play them a game of golf? No, I just thought maybe a good club might come in handy. After all, I'm unarmed. Well, your clubs are downstairs in the whole closet. Oh. Well, here goes. You be careful. I will. Uh-oh. I think he hears you coming, Daddy. Either that or he tripped over Bud's sandwich. Dad, Dad, come over here to the window. Quick. What is it, Bud? What do you see? Hurry up. Look down there in the driveway, see? Now where? That's him sneaking away from our house. Well, I'll be dog gone. Let me see, Daddy. Let me see. Get back, Kathy. What is it, Jim? What do you see? That's him all right. Look, Dad, it looks like he's carrying something in his arms. Kind of a small bundle. That's the silver. I know it is. Now calm down, Margaret. He won't get far. They'll catch him. Look, Father, he's heading toward the Davis's place now. They must be next on his list. I'd better get down and call Ed. Look, he's trying the back door and he can't get in. Let me see. Let me see. Kathy, stop crowding. I'll turn blue. He's going around to the kitchen window now. Jim, now's your chance to go down and call the police. I'm going to. I want to call Ed and warn him first. Hey, he's trying to get the screen off. Look at him, Dad. Well, I'm going down now and phone. I'm coming, too, Daddy. Wait for me, Father. Kathy, you've forgotten your slippers. My feet aren't cold. Hey, I'm coming, too. I never knew it took so many people to make one phone call. Mrs. Silvercom, Jim. I don't know. I haven't looked. But snap on the line. I can't find the phone book. Okay. You don't need the book. Their number's Circle 2848. 2848? Hey, Dad, look. The kitchen window's open. That's how he got out. By George? That's right. And he ate up the chicken. Look, there's a plate on the floor and some empty bones. I thought you said you put the chicken away, Jim. Huh? Better hurry and call, Father. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Circle 2848. God, look in the dining room and see if any of the silver's gone. Just a second, Mom. I'm hunting for my sandwich. I wonder if he took that, too. It'll serve him right if he did. Somebody peek out the window and see if he's gotten into Ed's house yet. I can't seem to raise anybody over there. Maybe he's got Mr. Davis. Wait, wait a minute. Hello? Hello, is that you, Ed? Yeah. Now, this is Jim, Ed. And listen, I've got to make this fast, but we've located him. Located who? The burglar. He climbed out our kitchen window and went over towards your place. No. Because we saw him. We saw him trying to get in your window. You? Yeah. I went out to find our cat, and when I found out I'd locked myself out, and my wife had gone back to sleep, and I didn't want to wake her, so I climbed in the window. Oh, I see. Have they got him yet, Daddy? But we saw somebody over by our place carrying something. That was me. Evidently, your kitchen window was left open, and our cat jumped in there and got hold of some chicken. I'm sticking his mouth when he jumped out again. I caught him. Oh. What's he saying, Dad? I'm sorry about the chicken, Jim. Oh, that's all right. Well, you better get back. Hey, wait a minute, Jim. Wife's calling me. What'd you say, dear? Oh, it's just Jim. Hey, let his imagination run away with him. Jim, you better get some sleep. Sorry I disturbed you. Oh, that's all right. Sorry I disturbed you. Good night. Good night. What did he say, Dad? What happened? Did they catch him? Now, look, kids, there's just one thing I want to say to you. After this, don't jump to conclusions just because you hear some little noises. Huh? And don't let your imaginations run away with you. Now, come on. Let's get to bed and get some sleep. For goodness sakes. Unless your family has a good breakfast every morning, they're probably not getting the right nourishment to properly carry them through to lunch. But it's really quite easy and inexpensive. To give them the kind of breakfast they need. A breakfast that supplies one quarter to one third of their daily nutritional requirements. According to authorities, a good breakfast should include fruit or fruit juice, bread and a spread, milk and cereal. Which cereal to serve? For flavor and for health. Try post-40% brand flakes. You'll be giving them the important Keep Regular Benefits of brand plus a wonderful new magic oven flavor. That's delicious. So start serving good breakfasts and make them better with post-40% brand flakes. Tell the mystery of the night intruder in the White Frame House on Maple Street has been completely, if not a little unromantically, solved. And once again, the calm serenity of the night, that is what little is left of it, is settled over the household. The solitude is broken only by the whispered questions of Margaret as she tries to get a fuller explanation of events from a very sleepy husband. Like this. And so it was the cat that got in, is that it? Yes, yes, that's it, the cat. Now let's get some sleep, Margaret, please. All right, dear. Well, then Kathy must have left the kitchen window open. I told her to close it. Margaret, good night. Good night, dear. Well, thank goodness we didn't lose the silver. Margaret, please. It'll be breakfast time in three hours, and I've got to get up and go to work. Well, you'd better get some sleep, dear. Good night. Good night. Jim. Jim, I think Kathy's calling you. Huh? Ooh, what? Kathy's calling you. Dad! I better see what she wants. She wants you. Daddy! What is it, kitten? Oh, no. It's with Father Knows Best, starring Robert Young as Jim Anderson. Until then, good night and good luck from the makers of post-40% brand flakes, America's largest-selling brand flakes, and Instant Postum, the drink that's entirely caffeine-free. In our cast, we're Dorothy Lovett as Margaret, Mary Lee Robb, Ted Donaldson, Helen Strom, and Barney Phillips. It comes in a red, white, and blue box. What is it? Hot ale. It has the picture of Roy Rogers on the package. What is it? Hot post wheat meal. It's packed full of whole wheat nourishment. What is it? Hot post wheat meal. It has a rich, delicious, nut-like flavor. What is it? Hot post wheat meal. Cooks in just three minutes. Another member of the famous post family. What is it? Hot post wheat meal. It's the best hot cereal you ever ate. It was transcribed in Hollywood and written by Paul West and Roswell Rogers. This is Bill Foreman speaking. Tonight played Truth or Consequences on NBC.