 Something weird's in the garden. I'm trying to move this hammer, but it won't budge. Mjölnir, a powerful, dangerous weapon. We'll get back to our base now. Why would I? Let's just pretend that didn't happen. Now I have the anger to do this. I'm going to the companion house to jump out with. Points for trying. You're gonna be killing me. Don't judge me for the first time. Here we go. Bartmines, but it's DC. All dogs that will receive a superhero's authority, depending on the object they touch first. It's everybody found out. Find your weapon. It's time to form it. I must find my hero power. The hell? Who left this here? My legs. This is a shot. The garden has been selected as my father's right. Professor X? I wonder if one of Cap's powers allows me to create jelly babies to American patriotism. Where's a prop? Maybe to find something good has to impress Ace. Because for whatever reason, my perseverance just doesn't cut it these days. Maybe Batman's power is to make it rain. This is amazing. I can see into the minds of everyone and make them do anything I want. Companion house, here I come. Hey girl, I got you little something for a woman like you. My penis. Maybe I shouldn't say little. Time to have some fun. What? I did not do this? Stop hitting yourself, stop hitting yourself, stop hitting yourself. This is hours of fun. Eh, so apart from smacking people, what else can I do with the hammer? Who do I want to shock? Language. So, what's your superpower? Super strength and ultimate frisbee. Ultimate frisbee. You've just made that up haven't you? Okay, maybe not frisbee, but maybe more. So have you found your yet? No, not yet. To be honest, I just figured it would fall right into my hands. Peach Cappadoia has been selected as mine. Well, I guess it's time to try this thing on. I have a sudden urge to make a lot of quips. I suppose it's giving me the power of Spider-Man. Me in this random corner of the garden. Hmm, sunglasses. Perhaps they're from Cyclops. From X-Men. Oh, what in the name of Mel's luscious locks has happened now? Celestial Core has been selected as daredevil. I see. Or rather I don't see. Well, better get going I suppose. Dang! Silly me, it's this way. Oh, okay, that was close. I wonder how these things work. Well, I guess Wolverine is kind of angry on that. I know it's like that. But I do need something to piss me off first. Here you, Jackman, heads up. If you were the one to find this props, then you should do my bidding. Do you understand, the writer's soul? Go to hell. Do you know who I am? I am Stephen fucking Moffat. They are taken away. It's the biggest body in Doctor Who wrote the word from me. Then you are severely mistaken. Mission report. November 23rd, 1963. Longing. Sonic. Fuzz. Tars. Seventeen. Companion. Nine. Jellyfish. One. Raise your arms, soldiers. Time for an upgrade. So as Batman, my powers are unlimited battle ranks and tons of cash. Is that really it? I suppose there are a few uses for these. That was cool. Oh, you and Colin are doing too much trouble, are they? They did her in the toilets? Cold stand? What are you gonna do? I'm gonna find my soap of power and take your ass with it. Good luck with that. Deal with all this money. Every tunnel will be selected as Quicksilver. Enough of waiting in surprises, you just nabbed. Well, fuck, they shot. That's why you're here for throwing a battering at me. Oh, may it like the real Quicksilver and get shot, will ya? Too soon, man. Too soon! Some of the people's props are popped up left, right and centre for me. Oh, no. Has to be different, doesn't it? I can't just magically appear. Oh, no. No, no. Not that easy, I tell you what. When I find my prop, it better be. Good. I have a sudden urge to kill Matt. Again. This time for hazy runes of me. Whoa! Oh, my God. Simply by touching your prop, I've been transformed into Superman. How is the flight? That's what. I've got to scan myself. I guess the Sonic High's elements of Kryptonite built in. Perhaps that's why it's green. Equestrian, what are you doing? Tell me. I don't know. You? Um, Chris, what are you doing? Superman doesn't work in the confines of the law. Neither does Batman. Superman could be unstable. Have you seen Batman? Superman is an alien. There's a pretty decent excuse. You, on the other hand, Mr. Batty Boy, is a billionaire who could be banging supermodels but is instead dressing up in a rubber gimpsuit and fighting crime. Who's more unstable than that? Sure, I'm gonna kill you because Zack Snyder demands that you're bastard. Oh, oh, you're bastard. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Help! Eugh. Look at him, mate. Have you not watched Civil War? I don't shoot at Moffy. Moffy, is that really what we're going for? If you have a problem with the script, talk to Jack, not me. You're breaking the fourth wall and siding with the enemy. That writer man on the floor, turn what could have been an awesome look at a darker doctor with me and turn it into Matt Smith version 2, or more accurately, can I who? Whoa, calm down there Scotty. Calm down? Don't you fucking tell me to calm down? Language. Or don't you tell me to mind my fucking language, you dick. Now excuse me, I'm gonna end this fucking writer before he finishes me off. If you do that, I'll have to stop you. And if you're gonna do that, I'll shoot you. It doesn't have to end in a fight, Capaldi. Just started a war! Wrong choice, Scotty. Why choose his side? Because he's bucking, I'm Captain America. I'm sorry, Peter. You know I wouldn't do this fight any other choice, if he's my friend. Bo-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha.