 Amen. Okay, keep your place there in 1 Corinthians chapter 7. We're going to be coming back, put a bookmark there, because we're going to be coming back to that chapter throughout the sermon. Let me first introduce to you what the Seasons of Life sermon series is all about and what it will entail. So I've kind of broken it down into four separate sermons. The first sermon, which is this morning, is going to be called The Single Life. The Single Life. And then we're going to talk about, next week, we'll talk about the married life. And then we're going to talk about raising young children. And then we'll talk about raising older children. And the challenge of this morning's sermon was that the first and the fourth sermons are kind of going to intersect each other. The whole idea is to give us a loop of our Seasons of Life here. It's not so much the age that you are, it's more of the season that you're at in your life. So when I talk about the single life, I'll be directing the sermon towards the youth, mainly. But if you're a single person, that obviously applies to you as well. So the first sermon series this morning is called The Single Life. Now, I first want to talk about a little bit that's going on in this chapter in 1 Corinthians chapter 7. This is Paul's perspective, this chapter. And Paul says this in verse number 6, and let me explain my opinion on this. I could be wrong, but this is just my opinion on Paul's statements here. In verse number 6, Paul says, but I speak this by permission and not of commandment. But in verse number 40, he says he ends the whole chapter with this thought. And I think also that I have the Spirit of God. So when we read this chapter, because mainly what Paul is talking about here is the decision to be married or the decision to stay single. That's one of the main themes of this chapter. And what he's talking about when he says, you know, I speak this by permission and not of commandment. Then he also says, you know, but hey, I have the Spirit of God. I also have the Spirit of God. Paul's just letting us know here that he's speaking from his own personal perspective as a single person. It's not that the advice that he's giving is not the Word of God. It's not that it's not true. It's not that it's just his opinion outside of the Word of God. He's just letting us know. And you'll see that throughout the chapter. He's just letting us know that, hey, this is from the perspective of where I am at in my life. It's still godly advice from the Holy Spirit. So let's go into the chapter knowing that. He's letting us know and he's telling us these things from his personal perspective as a single person. So as I preach this sermon on the single life today, I am going to focus heavily on the perspective of Paul as well. So Paul, single people in the room, Paul is probably the greatest example that we have in the Bible of a single person, especially a single man. 1 Corinthians chapter 7 gives us his perspective on being single or married. And let me tell you, the standards are high with Paul. So I first want to focus today on this is about the single life. So Paul is telling us from his perspective on the single life. I want to focus on the dangers first of the single life. Then we'll talk about some advantages that single people have. But we'll first start with the dangers of the single life. Because there are dangers of the single life. I personally talk to people about the dangers of the single life to single people. Because it's important that you understand this. And if you are single, you're going to remain single. Or you're just going to be single for the next few years. You need to understand the dangers that you specifically as a single person will face in your life. Okay, turn to 1 Timothy chapter 3. So first of all, this position of being single, it's not just about being young. It's more of your position in life is what I'm aiming at here. If you look at 1 Timothy chapter 3, in verse number 2, we see, let's read the qualifications of a pastor. In 1 Timothy chapter 3, in verse number 2, the Bible says, A bishop then must be blameless. The husband of one wife, vigilant, sober, of good behavior, given to hospitality, apt to teach. Not given to wine, no striker, not greedy of filthy lucre, but patient, not a brawler, not covetous. One that ruleth well his own house, having his children in subjection with all gravity. Now, this is not talking so much about the age of a person, as it's talking about their position in life. They need to be a pastor, needs to be someone who is experienced in marriage and raising children. I mean, who would want to listen to someone preach a sermon about raising children who doesn't have any children? That's really strange about the Catholics, right? I mean, you've got this guy that's never been married, never going to get married, we'll leave that one alone, but he's going to give you advice on raising your children, and it's weird. It makes sense that God would have these qualifications for a pastor. When I talk about a single person, I'm talking about, mainly it's the youth, but it could also just be somebody who's not married, so you need to have that experience. Turn to 1 Kings chapter 12. We're talking about the dangers of being single, of being young, and I'm speaking to those who are not married with children. So the first danger is this. We're going to read an example in 1 Kings chapter 12. And we're looking at Solomon's son, Rehoboam, and Rehoboam has just taken over the kingdom, and he's having a little bit of an issue here in 1 Kings chapter 12. Let's look down at verse number one, and let's read this story, and then we'll talk about the first danger of youth. In Rehoboam, the Bible reads, went to Seshim, for all Israel would come to Seshim to make him king, and it came to pass when Rehoboam, the son of Nebat, who was yet in Egypt, heard of it, for he was fled from the presence of King Solomon, and Rehoboam dwelt in Egypt. That they sent and called him, and Rehoboam and all the congregation of Israel came to Rehoboam saying, thy father made our yoke grievous. Now therefore make thou the grievous service of thy father, and his heavy yoke, which he put upon us, lighter, and we will serve thee. And he said unto them, depart yet for three days, then come again to me, and the people departed. And kingdom he said, let me think about it, he told the people. And King Rehoboam consulted with the old men that stood before Solomon his father while he yet lived, and said, how do you advise that I may answer this people? And they spoke unto him, saying, if thou will be a servant unto this people this day, and wilt serve them, and answer them, and speak good words toward them, to them, then they will be thy servants forever. But he forsook the counsel of the old men, which they had given him, and consulted with the young men that were grown up with him, his friends, his buddies, and which stood before him. So notice that the old men told him if thou will be a servant to those people, then they will serve you. That's a sermon for another time. But they gave him some advice, and let's see what he did. Then he went to his friends, in verse number nine, and he said unto them, what counsel give ye that we may answer this people, who have spoken unto me, saying, make the yoke which thy father did put upon us lighter. And the young men that were grown up with him, spoke unto him, saying, thus shall thou speak unto this people that spake unto thee, saying, thy father made our yoke heavy, but thou make it, thou it lighter unto us, thus shall say unto them, my little finger shall be thicker than thy father's loins. He's saying that his friends tell him, you tell them how it's going to be. You tell them that you're going to bring the hammer down harder on them than Solomon ever did, is what his friends said. And now, whereas my father did lay to you with a heavy yoke, they continue with this advice, I will add to your yoke, my father has chastised you with whips, but I will chastise you with scorpions. So Jeroboam and all the people came to Rehoboam the third day, as the king had appointed, saying, come to me again the third day, and the king answered the people roughly, and forsook the old men's counsel that they gave him, and spake to them after the counsel of the young men, saying, my father made your yoke heavy, and I will add to your yoke, my father also chastise you with whips, but I will chastise you with scorpions. Now, you see here that Rehoboam forsook the counsel of the old men. Turn to 1 Kings chapter 4. Now let's look at the gravity of what he actually did here. In 1 Kings chapter 4, just a couple pages back in your Bible, look at 1 Kings chapter 4 and verse number 29. So the first danger that I want to talk to you today about being single, especially if you're young and you're youth, is that you think you know everything. It's weird, but it's true, and I've been there as well, so don't think that I was some wise person when I was 17 years old. They think that they know everything. Look at 1 Kings chapter 4. Let's look at Solomon, who he was, and it kind of gives us a clue of who these old men were. He gave Solomon wisdom and understanding, exceeding much and largeness of heart even as the sand that is on the seashore. And Solomon's wisdom excelled the wisdom of all the children of the East country and all the wisdom of Egypt. For he was wiser than all men, than Ethan, the Ezraite, than Haman and Chalcol and Darda, the sons of Mahol. Obviously these were wise men if he's being compared against them, and his fame was in all nations round about. So it's clear that people came from all over the world to just hear Solomon speak his wisdom. Solomon was given, you know, the Bible says that Solomon, right here, his wisdom excelled, you know, he was wiser than all men. These old men that Rehoboam forsook the council of were the counselors to the wisest man who had ever lived. Think of the power that Rehoboam had in his hands, he just forsook, he just let it go. These men were experienced counselors to Solomon. You know, what you need to understand as a young person is that you basically know nothing. You know, do not let this pride overtake you because Rehoboam lost his kingdom. You know, his kingdom was split after this happened. Pride will destroy you as a young person. It's the most dangerous thing that you could face. And here's another thing that to remember, Rehoboam was king. So when he forsook the council of the old men, you know, they probably just quit giving him council anymore is probably what happened there. But you as a young person, if you forsake the council of the old men, the old men might be your employer. You know, you're not a king. You know, the old men could fire you. It's basically what could happen. You know, they have power over you in your life. Turn to Ephesians chapter 4. You need to adhere to wise counsel in your youth. That's why God gave it to you. You know, this is one of the main reasons, by the way, that you will see young people, and everyone here has seen it, I'm sure, that you will see young people that can't hold down a job for more than a month or two. Or even a year. It's because they come into a situation they know nothing and they pretend like they know everything. And that's a recipe for just getting you fired. Because people are, the old men that actually know things are only going to put up with that for so long. Okay? Look at Ephesians chapter 4. Look, this is the reason that God has surrounded you with wise counsel. This is the reason that God gave Rehoboam the old men to give him counsel. That was very wise counsel that they gave him. Ephesians chapter 4, look down at verse number 11. And he gave some apostles and some prophets and some evangelists and some pastors and teachers for the what? For the perfecting of the saints, for the work of the ministry, for the edifying of the body of Christ. God gave you wise counsel in your life, teachers, pastors, your parents to help you, to edify you, to help you avoid these types of pitfalls. You need to use the tools that God has given you as a young single person, okay? Look, I use this to this day, this advice. If you can identify the people in your life that can give you wise counsel, you will make leaps and bounds in the Christian life. Because there's two ways to learn things, right? There's the hard way where you don't listen to people and you make your own mistakes and you suffer the consequences. And then, you know, there's the easy way, which is you just listen to the pastors and the teachers that God has given you. If you have two parents at home, those are your teachers. Those are the people that are there to protect you, to help you make those leaps and bounds in your life without you having to fall into the pit. And then, they're probably going to be there to help pull you out to a certain degree. But the point is that you will make leaps and bounds if you can identify these people in your life and listen to them. I use this today. I'm 42 years old. I use this today. I can go into a work situation and I can identify the people that know what they're talking about quickly, and then I listen to those people. I listen to what they have to say. I don't think I know everything about every situation because nobody does. And it helps. It will help you. It will help you not have to make mistakes and learn everything the hard way. Ladies, you know, it's no different for ladies. You know, you're not sure about how to go about certain situations with your children. Or how to homeschool or how to run a home efficiently. There's people that God has given you that have done this, that can help you make those leaps in your Christian life without you having to learn everything the hard way, especially with your children. You don't want to learn things the hard way. So, we see a danger of being young and being single is youthful pride. So men, you know, identify the experts in your life. That's the advice I can give you. And then, here's another key. You can't just identify who they are. You have to listen to them. You have to listen. You know, two things I told Garrett when he was younger is that when we first moved to Sacramento was I told him, number one, that you need to be when there's men in the church talking in a circle or whatever, you know, you need to be listening to the men. You need to be putting yourself into those conversations. That's the first thing I told him. You need to be putting yourself into conversations with, you know, wiser older men in the church. And then, advice number two is when you get in those situations where you're in with those older men, you shut your mouth and you listen. That's the advice I gave my child. And it's good. You listen to what those men who have wisdom and who have done and they have experienced what they've done. And ladies, it's no different. Ladies, listen to the older women in the church who have raised children, who are raising children, who have homeschooled. Listen to them. They will teach you. You will make leaps and bounds in your Christian life. I remember even when I was a little kid, I was like, probably Jacob's age. There was a big, like, kind of the culture in my family was after big dinners, like Thanksgiving dinners and things like that. I remember, you know, there was a time when all the ladies would take all the food off the table when everyone was done eating and the men would sit around the table and talk. And by the time I was maybe eight or nine years old, I got to sit there. And I got to stay and I got to listen. And I remember, you know, and I didn't say anything, I just listened. Because I'm sure if I would have said something, I knew not to say anything. But I would listen to my dad and my grandpa talk. And I still remember how intimidating that was. I would sit there and I would listen to them and they would talk. How do they know all this stuff? They would talk about the world. They would talk about machines or farming or whatever. And I would just be like, how? It was intimidating for me as a young man because I was like, how am I going to learn? How did my dad learn all this stuff? How did my grandpa, how does he know all these things? And I would sit there and I would listen to them and think, how am I going to know all this stuff? It was intimidating and it should have been. It should have been to me because it's a responsibility to become that type of person, that type of man. So listen, don't be a ray of bone because pride is a serious danger for a single person, both male and female. The second danger, turn to Ecclesiastes. I love Ecclesiastes. Let me read for you 2 Timothy 2. The second danger of the single life is this. It's sin. Sin. In 2 Timothy 2, verse number 22, I'll just read for you. The Bible says, flee also youthful lusts, but follow righteousness, faith, charity, peace with them that call on the Lord out of a pure heart. In Ecclesiastes chapter 11. Ecclesiastes chapter 11. Look down at verse number 9. The Bible teaches that as a single person, you're going to have sin that you will have to deal with in your life. You're going to have lust that you will have to deal with. And look at Ecclesiastes chapter 11 and verse number 9. Rejoice, oh young man in thy youth, and let thy heart cheer thee in ways of thy youth. And walk in the ways of thine heart and in the sight of thine eyes. You're like, what in the world? What's he telling these kids to do? But know thou that for all these things, God will bring thee into judgment. So he's kind of tongue in cheek with the first few words of that verse where he's saying, go ahead and do what you want. Go ahead and do what your heart tells you to do. Go ahead and just look at what you want to look at. He's like, but God will bring you into judgment for that is what he is saying. Therefore remove sorrow from thy heart and put away evil from thy flesh for childhood and youth are vanity. Look, this is coming from a guy who denied himself nothing. Solomon took his wisdom and his riches and he ruined his own life with it. And he wrote the book of Ecclesiastes so you don't do the same. So I thank God for the book of Ecclesiastes and what he's telling you is that you're going to endure many temptations as a young person and you can use them to ruin your life. Is the bottom line. It's a dangerous time in your life. And I will tell you that if you ask, I mean it's a dangerous time in your life. To be young. Now Paul says if you can't contain here get married. We'll look at that in a little bit. But he's basically fornication, youthful. Turn to 1 Timothy 5. Those are some of the sins that you will deal with as a single person. As a young single person. 1 Timothy 5, let's look at some more sin danger in the single life. 1 Timothy chapter 5, look at verse number 11. Paul reads but the younger widows refuse for when they have begun to wax wanton against Christ they will marry having damnation because they have cast off their first faith. And with all they learn to be idle. Wandering about from house to house not only idle but tattlers also and busybodies speaking things which they ought not. I will therefore that the younger women marry, bear children, guide the house, give none occasion to the adversary to speak reproachfully. It's another reason to get married. The sin of idleness. This is a sin that single people will deal with. Will have to deal with. Because look, being single you don't have the burden that a married man with children has. You don't have 3, 4, 5, however many children to burden you. So here's my theory on avoiding idleness. This is my throw yourself into the lake theory. I'm going to share it with you today. When we first moved to Fresno, one of the biggest stresses, the biggest stress that I had personally was how I was going to preach 3 sermons a week. Pastor Jimenez had asked me to preach sermons before and sermons were a big deal for me. They took me a long time to prepare. They still do. But they take a long time for me to prepare and I was just like, how am I going to do this? I don't know how and work a full time job. But here's the answer to myself that I tell myself in those situations. I'm just not going to worry about it. It's just going to happen. And I'm just going to have to grind through it. So it's better, you know, I don't like going up to a lake that's got cold water and just dipping my toe in. Just throw me in and I'll either drown and die or I'll learn to swim. And I'm not dead yet. I'm learning to swim. And as the lake for single women is this, you're like, this doesn't make any sense. So what I'm trying to tell you is just don't worry about it. Just throw yourself into the lake. So how do I learn to not be idle as a single woman? Here's your lake. Serve at church to the single women. Become a soul winner. This is how not to be idle. Throw yourself into that lake. Study your Bible. You will have time as a single woman to study your Bible. You will be a teacher one day. You will be a teacher one day. Look, that should freak you out a little bit. That should stress you out. If you're a single woman, you want to get married. Even if you have very young children, it should scare you a little bit that you're going to have to be a teacher one day. Study your Bible. Start learning these things. Prepare for motherhood. You're going to become a teacher. Learn to run a home. Even a home business if you're a single lady. There's nothing wrong with that. My daughter and I are exploring ideas on how maybe she can do some things to save some money and things like that. And just learn what the Bible says about preparing to become a wife. Now running a home, let me get detailed on this one. This is no joke. I don't even really know how it all works. I played my wife's day yesterday. My wife got up at 5.30 yesterday and she started making sandwiches. And then she made sandwiches and then she packed all these little lunches and all these types of things. We came to the church. We got everything in the right. Some stuff went in the freezer. Some stuff went in the fridge. I don't know the logistics of it, but then we went on this trip. We got home. We drove back from the trip. We took people home. By the time we got home, then she just starts cooking. And I'm like, what in the world? I'm like, we've done it. Stop. Stop doing things. What are you even cooking right now? And she's like, oh, I'm cooking for Sunday night and Monday. Because basically, the way it works in my house, I come home from work and I just walk straight to the dinner table and we all sit down and eat together. Heidi calls me and she's like, when are you going to be home? And I walk straight to the table from the door. But that doesn't happen on accident. I was working with a guy a couple of years ago and his wife, he had one child and his wife, and I understand I shouldn't have said this to him. So don't bring that up to me later. But his wife was gone. This was somebody I worked with. His wife was gone on a trip with her friends or something. So his mother-in-law and his mother both came to stay with him. And they both came to live with him for a week to help him take care of his child. His one child. And he came to work every day and he was just like grinning from ear to ear. He's like, man, he's like, I come home and the house is clean and I got, there's dinner on the table. He's like, it's crazy. I'm like, wow, sounds like every day at my house. And he's like, really? I'm like, yeah, I'm not kidding, even a little bit. But it's a big deal to run a home to be that help me to your husband. So he doesn't have to worry about those things to make sure that, you know, I don't have to worry about anything. It's just taking care of it, but it doesn't happen on accident. So you need to learn how to do all these things, especially, you know, the teaching part. Look, my kids just, they just get smarter every day. I don't know what's happening, but they're just getting smarter all the time. They're learning the Bible like crazy. That's not happening on accident. You know, it's not just, someone is teaching them every day. There's a method to the madness. So, I mean, this is something that as a single woman, you should be thinking about and planning for and preparing for. And this will keep you from being idle. Okay? The lake, the lake for single men is really easy. It's really easy. The lake for single men is this. When you're done with school, like high school, you need to get to work. Period. That's the lake that you need to jump into. And here, let me define work for you too. There's two criteria. You need to get a 40 hour a week job. And you need to understand what that feels like. And you need to get used to that. Look, I have not worked a 40 hour a week job in 15 years. I can't even remember what it would be like. If I had a 40 hour a week job and that's all I had to do, I'd be bored out of my mind. But I'm telling you, it's something that you need to get used to. Garrett just had about five, six weeks off when we moved here and he just went back to work a couple weeks ago. And you see it, it's like and then he's coming back and he's getting used to it again. But it is something that a man needs to be used to. Okay? He needs to work. That's your lake. That's your lake. Look, it's going to take, and here's why I say it's something you need to get used to. Because as a man, if you are going to raise a family on a single income, 40 hours is not going to do it. She needs to get that first hurdle done. Immediately when you get out of school you need to get to work on a 40 hour a week job. Because look, here's what happened in this country. In World War II, the women went to work. The men came back home and the women stayed at work. That's the basics of it. What happened. And when you double the workforce and you have this economy that is based upon a double income, it is difficult to make it on a single income. That's not what the sermon is about today but what I'm trying to tell you is you better get used to showing up every single day at a 40 hour work job, 40 hour week job. You better get, and if you're out of school that needs to happen now. And if that's a, here's the second criteria. It needs to be something that can support you. I mean you're one person as a single person. It needs to be something that can support you. If it's not, it's not a job. Find something else. That's the bottom line. Now let me give you, I'm not going to get into this today, because this is kind of where these two sermons, sermon number four and sermon number one kind of intersect each other. But there is a huge miss happening today in churches like ours. And I'm going to talk about that in detail on the raising older children sermon. You say what is a miss? I'm talking about an oversight. That's what I mean. Something that hasn't been thought of. A huge opportunity lost. So this is just a little preview to show up, you know, three weeks now. Because I will give you the details of that. Okay, look. Brother Angel and I, he had a conversation with me yesterday before we went on the trip. And I'm not trying to scare you about this working thing, single guys and even gals. I'm not trying to scare you. But Brother Angel told me, Brother Angel is in school. I'm not talking about him today. But he told me he's got a part time job coming up. And hey, if that doesn't affect your school, doesn't affect your church, doesn't affect your soul winning, and it's a decent environment where you're not in a bad environment, go for it. Work a few hours a week to start stocking some money away. No problem there. But he told me about his plan going forward and what he wants to do full time, and it's going to involve him working and also taking classes. And I told him, he's telling me, he's telling me these things. And I told him, the first thing that came out of my mouth is it's going to be hard. It's going to be hard. And I'm not trying to discourage you, I told him. But you need to know that it's not going to be easy. It's going to be hard. But here's the thing. Victory is sweeter when you've done something hard. I don't know if you guys noticed yesterday, but we walked by and we got lost on our hike. We weren't really lost. We missed a sign. We got lost on the hike, and I don't know if you guys noticed, but we overlooked that lake twice yesterday. And we went up to, when we were lost, we went to the, we were kind of on this downhill path and we were kind of lost and then we got to this part where you could overlook the lake. We realized we were lost, went back up the hill, and then we had to take this other trail up this crazy hill and we had to take the hens and strollers and like, I was done by the time we got to the top of that hill. And then we overlooked the lake again. But you know what? It was much better the second time. Cause we're like, we did it. We made it. And that's how it is. When you do something hard, it's very rewarding. So when you do something hard, when you go and you pursue a path that is hard, the reward is going to be that much harder than you do it. So I'm trying to encourage you. I'm trying to tell you, you know, Jesus said in John 16, he's like, I've spoken to you these things that you may not be offended. That's what he said. And he's telling them about the persecution that's going to come. And the things that they're going to go through. He's like, the reason I told you is so when they do come, you're not offended. So when you go into this thing and it gets, it's doing it. Don't be offended because you knew it was going to be hard. Cause I told you it was going to be hard. So if, you know, you just recognize that it's going to be difficult, but it's worth doing. Victory is sweeter when you have to go through something hard. You should always be pushing yourself. Okay, that's the disadvantages of being single. Sin, idleness, lost, you know, lost fornication. These things are going to be attacking you. Pride is going to be attacking you. And everything rises, comes from out of pride, by the way. So that's the one you got to watch first. Don't ever get prideful as a young, single person. So you say, I want to stay single. Well, there's some advantages. Go back to 1 Corinthians 7. I want to make sure I give you all these advantages from Paul's perspective. Okay, from Paul's perspective. There are advantages of remaining unmarried. Look at verse number 32 of 1 Corinthians 7. But I would have you without carefulness. He that is unmarried carries for the things that they belong to the Lord. How he may please the Lord. But he that is married carries for the things that are of the world, how he may please his wife. There's a difference also between a wife and a virgin, the unmarried woman carries for the things of the Lord that she may be holy both in body and spirit. But she that is married carries for the things of the world how she may please her husband. So he's saying that there's some advantages to being single. Because you can care much more for the things of the world. Let's look a little bit about Paul and who he was. Turn to Acts 15. Paul was a driver. Paul was somebody who was very driven. I believe that if Paul and Jehu from the Old Testament took a personality test it would come up the same. Because Paul was not messing around in his ministry. In 1 Corinthians chapter 7 and verse 7 you go to Acts 15 Paul says for I would that all men were even as myself. So when Paul talks about being single in chapter 7 of 1 Corinthians he's talking about that in the perspective of if you want to be single I would prefer that you be single because you could be like me. So let's look at Paul. Look at Acts 15. How can I become a Paul you say? Look he was an evangelist sent out from Antioch. The man was extremely driven and I want to look at the argument that he had with Barnabas in Acts chapter 15. Look at verse 35. Two men of God. Two men of God. They're very close brothers. Paul also and Barnabas continued in Antioch teaching and preaching the word of the Lord with many others also. And some days after Paul said unto Barnabas let us go again and visit our brethren into every city. Let's go on another missionary journey he's saying where we have preached the word of the Lord and see how they do and Barnabas determined to take with them John whose surname was Mark but Paul thought not good to take him with them who departed from them from Pamphylia and went not with them to do the work and the contention was so shark between them. Paul would not back down that they departed asunder from one another so Barnabas took Mark and sailed unto Cyprus and Paul chose Silas and departed being recommended by the brethren unto the grace of God. In Acts 13, 13 we just get a little snippet that Mark departed from Paul. That's all we really hear. And then here you see that to Paul it was a big deal. He's like look if you're coming with me we're going to work and we're not going to quit. Period. And Barnabas you know was obviously more of a hey let's give people second chances let's be long suffering. Paul's like no I need people I can depend on he's not one of them. And it got so sharp between these two men who were close together these two men were close that they said you go your way I'll go mine because I'm not taking him. He was a hard man. He was a driven man and he was serious and he was a hard man and who was right who knows they're probably both right. But I want you to understand that Paul was was no joke he was not messing around if you're going to go along with him you're going to stick it out and you're going to do the work he was a hard driver so the first advantage of being single is this you will have more time to serve the Lord and Paul says that in 1st Corinthians 7 you will have more time as a single single person from a time perspective you could literally dedicate your whole life to the Lord as Paul did right Paul could not have done all of that while he was married turn to Acts 19 think about his life I mean he was constantly traveling he was taking all these crazy risks I mean think about it I mean the guy was look at look at Acts 19 verse number 21 after these things were ended Paul was in the Holy Spirit when he had passed through Macedonia and K to go to Jerusalem saying after I've been there I must also see Rome Rome Paul was dedicated to go to Rome and Rome was quickly becoming the most dangerous place for a Christian after you know the 60 some AD I mean that's the Romans after they destroyed the temple in 70 AD the persecution of the Christians and they were trying to wipe them out is what they were trying to do it was terrible if you read about it and Paul's like I want to go to the heart of that because somebody needs to go there and I'm going to go there this is the kind of person Paul was you know he couldn't have taken that kind of risk it wouldn't have been responsible for him to take that kind of risk if he was married and had children you know I remember at work one day I worked at this power plant in North Dakota and you will feel like this if you didn't have children you will have these thoughts there was this power plant and they had these chimneys that were 680 feet tall and there was a little tiny elevator that went up to about the 20 feet from the top and then you'd have to climb a ladder up to the top there was something going on with the plant and a couple other engineers like hey let's go up there and check it out so I went with them and I just remember being up there because the chimney is so tall that in the wind it moves 3 feet in every direction it's a concrete structure that moves and you could feel it moving when you're up there and I remember being up there thinking this is really stupid that I'm up here this is dumb you know because I mean you literally have that thought when you're married and I'm like I got a family depending on me and I'm doing some dumb thing that I don't even need to be doing is why you're not going to catch me going skydiving either it's not that I'm afraid it's just I don't think I should be taking risks like that when there's so many people depending on me that's what I'm trying to get at that's a small comparison turn to 2 Corinthians chapter 11 let's look at Paul's resume so you can do these things when you're single you have that option look at 2 Corinthians chapter 11 in verse number 23 Paul says are they ministers of Christ I speak as a fool I am more in labor is more abundant in stripes above measure in prisons more frequent in deaths and think about this guy's getting thrown to jail all the time he's being beaten all the time he's being whipped all the time of the Jews 5 times received by 40 stripes saved one imagine that imagine being whipped like that like 5 times he said 39 stripes 39 you know stripes with a whip thrice I was beaten with rods once I was stoned remember when they thought he was stoned to the point they thought he was dead I suffered shipwreck a night and day have I been in the deep in journeyings often in perils of waters he was shipwrecked constantly in perils of robbers in perils by my own countrymen he's being stabbed in the back by people in perils by the heathen in perils in the city he's in constant danger in perils in the wilderness in perils in the sea in perils among false brethren in weariness and painfulness in watchings often in thirst and fastings often in cold and nakedness this guy was constantly in danger you know they say this is just a side note but they say that the reason that the Vietnam war was so hard on soldiers mentally was because they were you know if you look at like the days of combat of a soldier in World War II it wasn't that many days it was like you know a couple weeks or something like that but when people were in Vietnam for months and months and months at a time they were in Vietnam for 6 months and today they were under constant stress of being killed they were under constant stress of some villager killing them or a sneak attack of some kind that's why the Vietnam veteran is so it was such a big deal on them mentally because they were in so much stress constantly look at Paul he was constantly in danger that's what that reminds me of in verse number 26 go back to 1 Corinthians 7 you see the contrast here in verse number 2 he says he that is unmarried cares for the things that belong to the Lord but he that is married cares for the things that will please his wife it's a complete contrast you can't be this guy if you're married with children that's what Paul is saying in 1 Corinthians 7 so time is a big deal you know the type of situations that Paul dedicated the time his whole life to the ministry he gave all his time to the ministry you can't do that if you're married with children talk about a culture moment soul winning at Verdi Baptist church married family soul winning if you're married with children and you're a family and you go soul winning once a week you're doing well that's the culture there and that's going to be the culture here they're working out and they're working 40-80 hours a week some of the guys you look at the guys at Verdi and you're like oh man he's doing really well ask them how many hours a week they work there's some guys at that church that are raising families most of the guys at that church are working their tails off and it's a real encouragement to see me show up on Saturday morning soul winning rain or shine most of them work on Saturdays too it's time one guy is a friend of mine told me he's like I'm never going to quit soul winning because he's like I need God's hand on my life I need God's hand on my life to help him with his family but that's what they can do and if they miss Saturday they go Sunday they always make that sacrifice but single people at Verdi Baptist church will go soul winning much more you see the same thing here but they have the time they have the time to dedicate towards it and that's an advantage of being single here's another advantage you will have the resources turn to first Thessalonians first Thessalonians Paul even though he did not have to supported himself he was an evangelist and he could have you know taken money from the church at Antioch donations from wherever he was but look at first Thessalonians chapter 3 and let's start reading in verse number 7 for yourselves know how you ought to follow us for we behave not ourselves disorderly among you what's he talking about either did we eat any man's bread for not but rot with labor and travail night and day that we might not be chargeable to any of you not because we have not power see that he's an evangelist we could have said hey please feed us please we're going to need some money for our trip but he didn't do that because he didn't want to be chargeable to anyone for even when we were with you this we commanded you that if any would not work neither should he eat we hear that there are some with walked among you disorderly working not at all but our busy bodies you see that that idleness comes in again now them that are such we command and exhort by our Lord Jesus Christ they work and eat their own bread so he was being an example because he knew there was a problem in this church about people that were not working so he's like you know what we're going to work he said they travailed he's a single guy he's full time in the ministry being sent out by a church and he's working night and day he said to support himself they were tent makers and they worked for their own money so look as a single person look at the obvious math of it you will have much more resources to serve the Lord with you think about the men in this church you have 5, 6, 2, 3, whatever kids you know that they have their labor and you have your labor but theirs is divided by like 5 or 6 or whatever I mean the single person should have much more resources to serve the Lord with just resources in general you don't have 5 people to clothe 5 people to feed 5 people to put a roof over the head it's just you you can do much more financially and with your time than the man and woman who is married with children that's the bottom line, that's a serious advantage but Paul is talking about it from his own perspective there's no excuse for being a single person that can't even support themselves there's no excuse for that in the Bible you will not find it it says that you should be able to do more not less now here's the thing if you're wondering how this is possible well you're surrounded, this is part of church you're surrounded by men in a church who have somehow figured this out ask the question iron sharpeneth iron so man sharpeneth the countenance of his friend there's people in this building that have figured it out ask listen you know it's like walking along a path with someone that's next to you and then you come to a huge hole and one person has a board and he puts the board over the hole and he walks over it and the person next to him just falls in the hole then you come next to another hole and same thing board, fall in the hole board, fall in the hole hey maybe ask where did you get the board I mean there's no reason to keep falling in the hole again and again this is one of the biggest benefits folks of being in a church is you can be edified by your brothers and sisters it's simple it's simple go back to 1 Corinthians chapter 7 let's look at the decision to marry to get married 1 Corinthians chapter 7 in verse number 2 Paul makes this one pretty black and white that's what I like about this chapter nevertheless to avoid fornication let every man have his own wife and let every woman have her own husband he covers men and women right there now look we talked about staying single and we talked about the advantages of that and the disadvantages of that you know we talked about to avoid idleness young women especially 1 Timothy 514 out there for that the younger woman marry the younger women marry Paul gives that prescription for the younger women bear children guide the house give none occasion to the married to speak reproachfully he's like if you're going to become idle you're going to fall into all these sins he's like younger women just get married he says to the men he's like hey to avoid fornication it's better so you don't burn he's like just get married that's the prescription that he's giving now look I think that for most people men and women the answer is to get married that's what I think and I believe that the bible backs that up you know for two reasons we talked about them to avoid fornication idleness temptation sin in general sin in general and you know what if you remember learning to be idle if you do these things long enough you will form bad habits you will become someone who we all hope should never get married you will learn bad habits that frankly turn into poor character that's what bad habits turn into is poor character and the second reason that I think that most people should get married is this most people are not pulled listen very carefully to that he was a sent out evangelist of a church and he was an extremely hard driving man which is why I believe God used him and he relied on no one to support him even though he could have look I know a lot of men today I know evangelists today I do not know of a Paul today I have not seen anywhere near his equal so all these things where he's saying hey single people you know you could be single even as I that's a tall order that's a tall order that's why I believe that's the second reason that I believe that most people should choose to get married is what I believe now in the sermon on raising older children I'm going to get extremely detailed on how to prepare your kids to be adults that can have successful marriages and families I'm going to get down to the nuts of it of how you can do that but we see here that Paul is talking about just to wrap this up Paul is talking about the decision to stay single or to be married I believe most people should get married alright next week we're going to look at marriage we're going to talk about what the Bible says about being a biblical husband to a wife we're going to talk about what the Bible says about being a biblical wife about being a husband and then here's the big one you can say that we're married and I'm never going to get divorced and all these things but I want to show you what the Bible says about how to have a good marriage because just because you're married just because you're a husband and just because you're a wife and I want to preach the sermon next week and you're never going to get divorced which is what the Bible talks about how to have a good marriage having a good marriage is it takes something so we'll talk about that next week let's bow our heads and have a word of prayer Dear Heavenly Father we thank you for this chapter we thank you for Paul Lord we thank you for raising up this man and choosing this man to lead the ministry that he led Lord and all the things that he wrote down in the Bible with your Holy Spirit Lord help us to understand these things and to you know move our lives in the right direction Lord and that's the point of church is to read the word of God and then to grow which means to actually follow and do what the word says Lord Lord we love you we ask that you bless the rest of this day soul in this afternoon in church this evening in Jesus name we pray Amen