 We demystify what goes on behind the therapy room door. Join us on this voyage of discovery and co-creative conversations. This is The Therapy Show behind closed doors podcast with Bob Cook and Jackie Jones. Welcome to this first ever episode of The Therapy Show behind closed doors. We're really looking forward to this. This is something that we wanted to collaborate on to demystify what goes on in the therapy room. So we're going to use this first episode just as an introduction. I'm Jackie Jones, one of the hosts and I'm here with my mentor, trainer, a master of psychotherapy, Mr Bob Cook. So we're going to take a few minutes just to introduce ourselves and then we're going to talk through what you can expect from this podcast. The therapy show behind closed doors. So Bob, over to you. Do a wonderful introduction for the people that are listening. No pressure. No, what a wonderful introduction. Yeah, so I've been a psychotherapist for the last 38 years, which is a fair amount of time. And I think I probably, you know, sort of ranked up about getting on for 100,000 clinical hours. That's quite a long time. I'm also a trainer. So I teach people how to be psychotherapists. I've been doing that since 1993. And I'm a supervisor. So I supervise, you know, therapists and therapists of therapists. I'm also an international trainer. So I travel to different places and teach people how to do this job. And one of the places I used to go a lot to was Australia. But it's quite a long way away. So I stopped that Slovenia, Germany, spent quite a bit time in Europe. But the place I go to most now, or before the pandemic anyway, was Slovenia. So I've travelled around a bit. I've got, you know, I suppose in recent years, I've cut out some of the international training. But this, but this job is a job I really enjoy. It's a passion of mine. I'm now 70. So sort of semi retired. And when the opportunity to do this podcast came around, I thought, oh, that'd be really good. I'd like talking about therapy. I particularly like talking about therapy in general. And I think I've got a lot of experience to share to the podcast. So I'm very excited to be part of this with you. And looking forward to the whole journey, as they say. The whole journey. I first met you, Bob, about 10 years ago, when I attended the Bob trains in transactional analysis. And I went through that training. So I'm a transactional analysis psychotherapist, which I find really hard to say. It feels easier to do than what it is to say. So we've known each other for getting off for 10 years now. I went through Bob's four year training at the Manchester Institute of Psychotherapy, where Bob is a founder and a trainer. And as he says, a supervisor. But between us, I know, yeah, I better talk a little bit about myself. I run a private practice in Lancashire. I've been in private practice since I qualified. So I work from home and see clients from home. And I also do a podcast and online training and various things like that. But between us, we wanted to open the doors to the therapy room. You said something on one of our podcasts saying, nobody knows what happens behind the doors. And when I was doing my training, one of the things that we did was kind of like a goldfish ball, where we we watched you, theorising somebody. And you said that that's not often the case with a lot of training. That's true. You're absolutely right. And it's quite a secret world. Now, it has to be in terms of confidentiality. Yeah. Now, of course, that's that. So it's really only the supervisors who supervise the therapists or analysts, if you like, who really get a glimpse into the therapy room. And that can be by tapes, recordings, but for majority, usually by notes, which is the therapist being back, or they talk, you know, about the issues they wanted to bring to the supervisor. So the supervisors get a glimpse into that world. But except for that, and then there's books that are written about what happens in that food tales. And Irvin Yellum is a great writer of what happens in therapy rooms. But there isn't much written. And also, there aren't many experienced therapists that actually talk about what happens. And what I want to do in this podcast particularly is demystify, if there's any sort of mystifying to do in terms of the secrecy of what actually is an encounter between human to human beings. So that's one of my missions on these podcasts is to make what happens in that room accessible to the listeners. Yeah. And I think that was kind of where this was born from, you know, behind the closed doors to demystify it, because people say they go to therapy, but nobody knows what actually happens once they walk in the room. So we want to take away the curtain and open it up. You know, why go to therapy? What type of therapy are there? What happens in the first session? How do I pick a therapist? All these questions are more we plan on answering. That's right. And of course, I think we'll obviously talk on the podcast, but when we talk about therapy and counselling, not only we can talk about what the difference is between those two terms, but of course, before therapy and counselling, we had religious healing healers. We have healers that go back many, many, many, many decades and years, which you could call therapist, you know, very much like modern day therapists. But, you know, it's become very secretive, this whole therapy business in many ways. And I said, right, it's because of confidentiality, but I really like what you just said over there, to open the shutters a bit and to talk about what actually happens from a sort of professional therapist's size. Yeah. And it's not scary. No. But having said, no, it's not scary. Yes, that's true. And on another level, there's very few clients that have ever walked through my door that doesn't feel a great sense of apprehension about coming in and talking about themselves, especially the very most intimate, dark areas of their heart. So, you know, I saw someone today for an assessment, I've said I don't work clinically now, but I do do a lot of assessments and pass people on for therapy. And he was very nervous. And I said to him, it's very normal to be nervous. He's sat there very sort of scared in many ways. So, it's not scary. And on another level, to go and talk to somebody, because you are, you know, you're having really difficult times in life or whatever it is, it's often scary. Yeah, 100%. It's often taking that first step and crossing that threshold into that therapy room is quite a big thing for a lot of people to do. Yeah. I say to trainees, you know, teach people to be therapists, one of the things I say many, many, many, many times is the clients and the people that come through the door are going to be more nervous than you. Yeah. And that is always the case. Yeah. And it's so rare, you know, taking it down to the base levels that you can be in a room with another human being without fear of judgement. Yeah. Whatever you share in that room, there is no judgement. And I don't think there's any other place that I know of that is such a safe space. Yes. And one of the most important things we'll talk about it probably in the first podcast is that you pick the right therapist. So important. Yeah. Because it's really important that you get on with them. Yeah. Therapy is far more effective. And this isn't bloody rock size. It's far more effective if you actually get on with the person you're sitting in front of. And I hear so many people say, oh, no, I didn't like therapy. I didn't get the person. It's like, so did you try somebody? No, it put me off. It's like, no, don't. And often it's nothing against the therapist. It's just not a good fit. And that's okay. That's okay, because if you go down to the pub or you go down to the park, if you go to social gatherings, how many people are you going to get on with? You gravitate to the people you get on with. Yeah. And it should be exactly the same if you're going to spend all this money and spend a having many months and years of your life or weeks of your life or whatever. It should be exactly the same that you actually are going to have to, you know, gravitate hopefully through assessments to the people who are going to you're going to get on with 100%. And hopefully me and you are two of those very same people that people are going to get on with. You're the intellectual one. And I'm the one that is just in awe of you and learning along the way. Not that intellectual. And one thing I again, I want to say, I see this is I could speak forever about this subject area, but I'm going to say this. One of the things I really want to say that you did to become a professional psychotherapist is not about reading lots and lots and lots and lots of books and having lots and lots and lots of degrees. Thank God for that. Being able to relate to the person in front of you. So yes, I like reading lots of books. Would I almost have an academic? No, not really in true sense. But psychotherapy is about the human encounter. And it's about getting all people. And that's what I want to talk about in these podcasts. I just I love my job. I find it fascinating. But you know what? You find it fascinating because you've got a great sense of curiosity because you want to help people because you've got a good heart, not because you've got three degrees, even if you ever haven't. It's not that what it's about. I haven't. I've graduated once and that was from the Manchester Institute of Psychotherapy, Bob. And you were there on that day. What I wanted to say was that response to intellectual. I think that I think you know, I have read a lot and I have done a lot. I'm not an academic, but to be a psychotherapist, even though of course, you have to have a postgraduate degree, sorry, you have to have a degree as a postgraduate course. Even because of the essays, because of the research and many other things, but I can guarantee you now, the most competent therapists are not necessarily the people who've got endless amounts of degrees or whatever. They're the people that are the most human. So that's just a bit of an introduction to us. And this is going to be the field for the episodes to come. And to finish off this introduction, I just wanted to read the last bit that Bob wrote about what this podcast is because it just really resonated with me. And what Bob says is, please join us on this voyage of discovery and co-creative conversations. And I just love that because that's what it is, therapy. It is a voyage of discovery. And co-creative. Yeah. It's not the expert telling the other person what to do. So that's what's going to be in store on the therapy show, which is we're aiming to get to number one on the Apple podcast with this Bob. Did I tell you that? No, he didn't, but it sounds an exciting venture. That's what we're going to do. We're going to go for number one. The therapy show behind closed doors with Bob Cook and Jackie Jones heading for number one. So join us on the next episode and we'll speak to you more about therapy and everything that happens behind closed doors. Yeah, see you there. Bye. Bye. Bye. You've been listening to the therapy show behind closed doors podcast. We hope you enjoyed the show. Don't forget to subscribe and leave us a review. We'll be back next week with another episode.