 Thank you so much for joining us for MCC's new Muslim Ramadan Stories series. Today, Alhamdulillah, we have Sister Amanda with us. Thank you so much for being with us here today and being willing to share your story. Let's start out with you telling us a little bit about yourself. Okay, so I've been Muslim for about, I guess, 12 years now. It's been a long time. So a little background, just small on how I found Islam. I was basically in Morocco. And I got separated from our tour group. And so I was looking around, trying to find my tour group. Not sure where to go. Really nervous because, you know, it's a whole new, like, city and I don't know the language. Where were you? Morocco, 10 years. And I was walking and I heard someone singing. Well, I thought I was singing and I stopped to listen. And as soon as I stopped to listen and to, you know, just hear what was going on. You know, I felt so like, like a wave of peace and my calmness come over me. And as soon as I felt that, you know, I felt more safe and secure. And then, Alhamdulillah, the tour group guard came running up. He was like, where have you been? You know, we went back and forth like, where have you been? I don't know. And so before, you know, before we left that alleyway, I said, you know, who's the singer? Because I want to get that music. You know, I was like, I really want that music. I was really into music. I was a drummer in high school. So it was my thing. And he was like, oh, no, no, someone reading Quran. I was like, Quran. Okay. So what's Quran? And so he told me a little bit about, you know, what Quran was, is the holy book of the Muslims. And so I couldn't get a CD, which I was really bummed about. But then, you know, once I came back home and back to the United States, I started really looking into Islam. And then, you know, after a year of research and finding out about just the basics of Islam. And, you know, I woke up one morning, I was like, I'm going to become Muslim and I want to convert to Islam. So I was in oh, wait, now it's 21. Okay. So it's been so away 21. So that's a lot of years. Okay. So tell us about your first Ramadan. What do you what? How did you feel going into it? And what do you remember most about that Ramadan? At first Ramadan was, for me, it seemed really easy. You know, I was really excited to go into it. I knew a lot of local Muslims, like a whole family, like a family of 15 or something. And so they invited me over. So every day I went over to the house because I was living alone at the time. And I wasn't sure, you know, want to just experience Ramadan with other Muslims. So it was, it was really nice. It was also in the winter. So the days were a lot shorter. So I had a really great experience, you know, really seeing how, you know, people broke their fast and, you know, just like the spirit of things. And one thing I really, that really kind of stuck with me since then was every day, like before we broke for Iftar, before we broke our fast, you know, they started doing a little bit of du'az always. And I thought that was especially being a new Muslim, I was just like intrigued and how peaceful, because the whole house was rowdy and wild, you know, kids running all over the place. But then, you know, right before Iftar, once everybody, you know, everything calmed down, it was like a whole shift, you know. So that was really inspiring to me. Did they have you over like every day? Pretty much every day, yeah. Mashallah. May Allah bless them and reward them. Mashallah. Okay, so Mashallah, it sounds like that first Ramadan was pretty amazing, Mashallah. Yeah. What would you say has been your biggest struggle or struggles that you've faced during Ramadan? During Ramadan. I think struggles really just since then, you know, being, before I was married, you know, being not like not having any other family or living with non-Muslims. People, you know, living around all that, you know, people eating all day. And, you know, it was a really a mind shift of, you know, really getting a good mindset because it was really hard with the smells and the, you know, the food. And it was like, well, you know, it's not allowed, you know, we're fasting. So it was really, that was a big struggle I faced for a while because I would live with different family members. Also, they would, you know, be like, it's okay. You can, you know, why don't you come eat with us? I was like, you know, I can't, sorry. Mashallah. But after a while, they're, they just, you know, kind of understood and they, they were like, well, we're not going to budge her any. So they just gave up. Mashallah. So, Hamdallah. Mashallah. So, and then how were your experiences in the mustards? Were you, like, you know, when you first converted, were you in the Bay Area or? Oh, no, I was in Florida. And it was, the mustard there was, where I was at, it's a very small mustard, which I personally liked. So I'm, I am visually impaired, so I have very little vision. But for me, being in the small mustard, it was, it was nice because I was able to really learn and navigate easily. Mashallah. So it was, it was, it was really nice being at the mustard. I really, I would go there, you know, I would just catch the bus and go there all, all the time because I just loved the atmosphere of just being at the, nobody had to be there. You know, I could be the only person there and a lot of times I was. But, you know, just the feeling of being at the mustards was, for me, it was like a home away from home, just get away from everything. I was going through a lot, so it was like a restful place. Mashallah. Sounds like it probably was peaceful too, just being there in the mustard by yourself. Mashallah. Do you have, can you tell us about a Ramadan memory, the special one that really sticks out to you? I think one was, I was in Egypt back in 2010 for Ramadan. And besides my first Ramadan, you know, being around a whole family of Muslims, you know, after that I wasn't really. But being in Egypt during Ramadan and experiencing like a whole, I mean, whole different type of Ramadan, basically. Even though I had no family, I only knew a couple people. But even just like neighbors that didn't even know me. It was, it felt, it was really interesting and like humbling, I guess, like people just came over and give you food and, you know, and greeted you, not even just having food, but just like, you know, making you feel a part of the family. And so that's when Ramadan really stuck out because I felt so connected, even though I had no idea who these people were, you know, they were pretty strangers, but they felt like a family to me. And I think like, during being in a Muslim country during Ramadan, you get to hear the Adhan, and it's just a totally different thing, Marshal. You do have that, also that feeling of just, I don't know, there's something about hearing the Adhan, you know, five times a day from the, you know, neighboring mosques. Yeah, and echoing all around. I don't know any other countries, but in Egypt, they had like in the mornings for Suhoor, like an hour or so before Fajr, like they start going around and banging the drums and awaken people. And to me, that was so cool because I was like, wow. Yeah, Marshal. That's an amazing memory. I mean, even just from the first one that you had, it sounds like being surrounded by that, you know, being included in that family. That was an amazing start, Marshala. Okay, so we're going to switch gears a little bit. As a convert, we didn't grow up Muslims, so we don't have any Ramadan traditions that we're bringing into, in with us as an adult. So we basically get to create our own Ramadan traditions, right? So have you started to kind of like do anything like that where you're creating your own Ramadan traditions? And if so, what do you do? You know, I haven't, I didn't do it for a while. You know, I was just, it's Ramadan, you know, just, I guess, a routine thing. I was excited. But for me, like, you know, having kids now, I feel that the way I look forward to Christmas is how I want them to look forward to Ramadan. So I started getting like Moon and Star, like lights and decorations of like lanterns and moons, and, you know, finding different activities my daughter can do. So, you know, having that like spirit of Ramadan. I haven't really done like any focus like foods or anything. Mostly it's been more of like decorating and just getting in that spirit, like getting a, you know, presents for Eid and just preparing the whole month, basically. Right, inshallah. So yeah. So this was, this is going to be inshallah our second Ramadan during a pandemic. So how, you know, tell me about how things were for you last Ramadan and how you hope to, you know, make lemonade out of lemons this Ramadan. I mean, it's alhamdulillah, it is getting better. And, you know, the must be most are opening up a little bit. But tell me about your experiences last year and inshallah how what you hope to do this year. Last year was pretty quiet. Which is, you know, inshallah, that's a good thing, you know, it really gets you to focus on yourself and not more, not to focus on food. But I didn't miss, you know, being able to have, you know, friends or families over, you know, for, you know, maybe a night or two just to have that sense of connection, you know, and just to break fast with each other and have, you know, just with other people and more atmospheric. I don't know how to explain it. But yeah, so last year it was a bit quiet. But at the same time I was grateful it was quiet. Because then I, even though I missed, you know, eating with other people and praying and stuff, I, for me, I was able to focus more inward and to really reflect on how I can improve, you know, myself and with, you know, not just during Ramadan, but beyond of things I can improve on my myself. So it was opening, I guess. Mashallah, alhamdulillah. Mashallah, last Ramadan was definitely a special chance for us to kind of look inwards. Yeah. Alhamdulillah. Okay, so my last question for you. What would 2021 Amanda, what advice would 2021 Amanda give to the Amanda brand new Convert Amanda, as she embarks on her first Ramadan or even like as a new Convert, looking back, what would you tell her? I would try and have her realize or tell her that, you know, yeah, Ramadan is about, you know, is about not just the food and everything, it's more to that. And, you know, don't, especially being a new Convert, it can be difficult to fast all day without food, without water, you know, it's a whole different life change, you know. So I would really encourage her to, you know, yeah, it's difficult, but you're trying and just to focus and try to focus on, you know, not to be too hard on yourself because we can be like that, you know, if we couldn't finish the whole day like all man, you know, and you feel down, but, you know, and in hindsight, that's a blessing, you know, because you did try. So just focus more on, you know, if you can't seem to fast all day, you know, go read some Quran and just try to focus more on other aspects of the Dean that you can improve to help you through Ramadan and beyond. So. Any final thoughts about Ramadan or just general thoughts for Convert friends out there? I don't think so. Okay, I'm on the line. Okay, so anyway, thank you so much, Amanda, for being here and being willing to share your story with us. We really appreciate it. Thank you. And thank you for watching our session today. And inshallah may Allah bless your, bless your Ramadan, make it fruitful and bring you bring us all closer to him. Inshallah. I mean, as salamu alaykum.