 The Craft Foods Company presents Harold Perry as the Great Gilder Sleeve. The Great Gilder Sleeve is brought to you by the Craft Foods Company makers of Parquet Margarine. Millions of women all over America serve Parquet because it tastes so good. Why, Parquet tastes like it should cost twice as much. To market, to market, to give some parquet. Home again, home again, try it today. You like it, you love it, like me, who said they're favorite margarine. Parquet Margarine made by Craft. Well, like a lot of us, the Great Gilder Sleeve hasn't done much of his Christmas shopping yet. With only eight more shopping days to go, he's finally grappling with the situation. It's after dinner now, and we find the great man hunched over his desk in the den. Skates, car boy belt buckle, table tennis set, basketball. Yes, that takes care of Leroy. A coat for Birdie. A wrist watch for Adeline. So, there's the Jolly Boys. Oh, my goodness, I've got a lot of people to buy presents for. Got a lot of extra expenses too. The baby getting married. I'll just have to cut down a little on every present, I guess. Oh, there you are, Miss Gilder Sleeve. Yes, Birdie. Oh, hello, baby. Little Romary. Just brought her in to say good night. It's her bedtime. Yeah, good night, little darling. Sleep tight. Just been figuring out what I'm going to get the baby for Christmas, Birdie. I'm going shopping tomorrow. Oh, that's nice. The time I get all the things for her and Leroy and Marjorie, it's going to cost me a small fortune. Yes, I guess so. Well, that's worth it, though. But I'm going to have to cut down somewhere this year. Yes. Yeah, I have to economize on somebody, Birdie. Oh. Well, you don't have to say no more, Miss Gilder Sleeve, I understand. What? If you can't afford to buy me a present, it's okay with me. But Birdie, I didn't... It's all right, I understand. But I want to buy you a present. I know you want to, Miss Gilder Sleeve, but if you can't afford it, don't you worry, I understand. But you don't understand. Yes, I do. I just want to see those children's happy faces when they open their presents. That's all I want. That's very nice of you, Birdie, but... No, sir, you don't have to buy me no presents. Christmas morning, when the family comes downstairs and says, Merry Christmas, Birdie, that's enough for me. But, Birdie... Good night, Mr. Gilder Sleeve, and don't worry, I understand. Oh, dear. Good old Birdie. Well, she's going to get that coat anyway. I'd like to save some place, though. Let me see. I'm getting Leroy and Marjorie an awful lot of presents. Maybe they wouldn't mind giving up just one thing. Every little bit helps. Now, Leroy doesn't have to have that basketball. Sure. I'll just explain to the boy. I have to save some money. He's old enough to understand. Leroy. Yeah? Oh, you and me, living room. Well, how are you this evening, my boy? Huh? I said, how are you? I'm okay. Well, that's good. And how's school? School? How am I on Christmas vacation, onk? Oh, yes, of course. Christmas. See, that reminds me, Leroy. I wanted to talk to you about something. You know, Christmas is a wonderful time of the year. Sure it is. Little families gather around the Christmas tree. Everybody gives each other presents. Yeah. But remember, Leroy, it isn't how much you give. It's the spirit in which you give it. Oh, sure. Glad you understand that, my boy. So I know you won't mind if I don't give you that basketball. What? No, Leroy. You promised me. I know that. Sorry, you get your basketball? I was... Yeah. See you later. Just a kid. Can't expect him to understand. I'll go up and talk to Marjorie. She's older. I can explain these things to her. Won't be the end of the world if she doesn't get those silver slimmers. Sure, she'll understand. Well, Marjorie sounds happy. Marjorie! Thank you. Marjorie, what are you all dressed up for? Are you going out tonight? Oh, no. I was just trying on my formal. Make sure it looks all right for the school dance New Year's. Well, you look beautiful, my dear. Do I really, Yankee? Walt's singing in front of the mirror. He isn't that cute. Marjorie, there's something I wanted to ask you. Oh, Uncle Mort. I know I'm going to have a wonderful time at that dance. I'm sure you will, but... I'll be dancing on air all evening. I just can't believe it. What's that? I'll be wearing my first pair of silver slippers. I've always wanted a pair. And now you're going to get them for me. Uh, yeah. You're just the most wonderful Anki in the whole world. Here's what I think of you. Now, Auntie, what was it you wanted to ask me? Uh, may I have the next waltz? Didn't do so well with Leroy and Marjorie last night. Well, Christmas is really for children anyway. Got to save on somebody, though. Maybe the Jolly Boys. After all, they're adults. Except the judge, he's in his second childhood. But what if they get me expensive presents? I'll try to find out. I can start with Pee-Vee. I'll just drop you in the drug store a minute. Santa Claus is coming at the town. Well, good morning, Pee-Vee. Oh, hello, mister. Do you want me to say it? A nice morning, isn't it? Yeah, it seems to be. I'm going to have a good night. I'm going to have a good night. I'm going to have a good night. I'm going to have a good night. Pee-Vee? Now, Pee-Vee, I'm going to do a little Christmas shopping today. Oh, natural. Yeah, I'm taking the day off. I guess the office can get along without me for one day. Yes, I believe it can. Yeah. Go right down to Hogan Brothers and finish up. Have you done your Christmas shopping, Pee-Vee? Yes, I have. Oh? You bought all your presents? Yes. Mrs. Pee-Vee and I wrapped them last night and put them under the tree. Well, then I guess you'll wrap mine. Yes, we did. Was it a big package? Well, it was a small package. I didn't say that. And I guess it was about medium. I didn't say that either. I guess you didn't get me anything too fancy. How's that? I mean, I don't suppose you got me anything expensive. Why not? Well, I mean... Mr. Gildersleeve, no one has ever called me a cheapskate. Pee-Vee, I didn't say that. I don't toss my money to the winds, but I do have a reputation as a moderate spender. Of course you do. No, sir, there aren't any fish hooks in my pocket. I know that, Pee-Vee. I didn't mean that at all. I just didn't think that you should spend too much money on my present. Why not? What? I can afford it. Oh, my goodness. In fact, I'm buying bigger presents than ever this year. You are? Certainly. Pee-Vee's pharmacy may not be a gold mine, Mr. Gildersleeve, but it's a good living. Pee-Vee, I... Of course I'm just a little businessman, not a city official. I can't take the day off and go shopping on the taxpayers' time. Oh! Look here, Pee-Vee. I'm earning my salary. I'm worth every cent the taxpayers pay me. Well, now, I wouldn't say that. Sir! Merry Christmas! Stores, you're crowded. It's like everybody's doing the shopping today. Mr. Benzies! Every time I come in here, they're looking for Bentley. Well, let's see. Where shall I start? Where's that list I made out? You'll be. Huh? Oh, hello, Jack. I thought I saw your rotund figure pushing through there. Yeah, it is jammed in here. Has it been crowded like this all morning? No, Gildy, just since you came in. Now, look, Judge, I've got a lot of shopping to do. I've just about finished mine. Good for you. Yes, I just made a purchase at the Thai department. Now I'm going... The Thai department? Yeah, I bought a present there for a friend. Oh, you did? Anybody I know? Daisy's don't tell, Gildy. Well, just give me a hint, Petunia. Now, don't be nosy, Gildy. You'll just have to wait until you look into your stocking Christmas morning. Oh, for good. Goodbye, Noel. He's not fooling anybody. I bet he bought me a cheap Thai again, just like he did last year. That's all right with me. At least I can save some money on his present. What in the world is that? Excuse me. Excuse me, madam. Here we are. Can I help you, sir? Yes, I'd like to look at your dollar ties. Yes, sir. This kind of right here. Oh, yes. Pretty bright patterns, aren't they? Peppermint stripes, pinwheels. Here's one with big yellow sunflowers on it. Just the thing for the judge. Would you like one with a sunflower, sir? Sure. If the old goat doesn't want to wear it, he can always eat it. I beg your pardon? Nothing. Now, put it in a box, please. It's a gift. Third floor, sporting goods, menswear. Out, please. Out! Roy's basketball up here. That one's rather nice. Oh, my goodness. There's Hooker again. What's he doing following me around? Really sees that dollar tie. May I see the blue silk robe again, please? Yes, sir. Wonder who he's buying a dressing gown for. That's very nice. Do you have that in a larger size? Oh, yes, sir. What size did you want? The largest you have. It's for a very fact, darling. Oh? I wonder. Oh, you couldn't be buying that for me. It's someone I've known for years. I'm really very fond of him. Could be. I know it's more than he'll get me, but, after all, he has a lot of expenses with his family. By George, it is me. I misjudged that fine old fellow. He's true blue. And I got him a necktie with sunflowers on it. I'm going to take it right back and get him something nice. Down, please, down. Oh, Clark. Clark. Yes, sir. I bought this necktie. The one with the big sunflowers. Remember? But, sir, you just bought it. I know that. But I just remembered that the friend I bought it for can't stand sunflowers. And he's got hay fever. Oh, I see. Yes, so if you'll just give me my money back. But, sir, that means I'll have to make out an entire credit slip just for a dollar. Couldn't you exchange the time? No, I can't. You've got a lot of nerve anyway, selling me a cheap tie like that from my very good friend, the judge. All right, I'll make out the credit slip. I'll be right back. Yes, I told him. Who does he think he is? Well, well, you did. What? Oh, hello, Horace, old friend. Yelly, are you buying me one of those dollar ties for Christmas? An old friend like you, I wouldn't think of it, judge. I'm going to get you something much more expensive, Horace. Well, it's very nice of you. Don't mention it. But you really shouldn't. Oh, forget it. And I want to assure you, judge, it has nothing to do with what you're getting from me. Well... And, of course, if I find a blue silk dressing gown in my stocking, I'll know Santa Claus didn't bring it. What? Don't you pretend now, judge. I saw you buying that robe, you know, for that fat fella. Oh, you did. I know, Horace. You wanted to surprise me on Christmas. I've got a surprise for you right now, Gildy. I didn't buy that robe for you. Huh? I got it from a cousin in Wichita. You did? Yes. You know, the one that's a butcher. Sorry to disappoint you, Gildy. Well, I've got to be going. Bye. No. You old goat. What does a butcher need a dressing gown for? You probably wear a straw hat with it. Well, here you are, sir. What? Here's your credit slip for the tie. I don't want it. What? But, sir, you said you wanted to get something else for your friend. He's no friend of mine. Give me that tie back. Mr. Wall, are we going to talk now? Sure, Birdie, if you'd like to. Well, to tell the truth, I like eating what we talk about more than I like talking about it. Well, friends, as you may have guessed, Birdie is on her favorite subject, parquet, the margarine that tastes like it should cost twice as much. And the reason parquet tastes so good is it's made from the selected products of American farms and prepared with all the care of a rare luxury food. It has the fine, delicate flavor. It has the nutritional value plus 15,000 units of essential vitamin A. Yes, it's a luxury in every way but one. Parquet costs only about half as much as the most expensive spreads. Well, Mr. Wall, anybody can tell that by just looking around at the store. But if you want to know how good parquet tastes, you've got to take some parquet on a knife, spread it on something, maybe hot cornbread. Hot cornbread. Or muffins or pancakes or toast. Then pop it right into your mouth. Mr. Wall, when you get that parquet flavor you like so much, you don't care whether you do any talking or not. Well, why not take birdie suggestion, friends? Get parquet and tomorrow enjoy this margarine made by Kraft that tastes like it should cost twice as much. That's P-A-R-K-A-Y. Well, it's afternoon now and the Great Gilder Sleeve is still fighting the crowds in Hogan Brothers' department store. So far, his plans to economize on his Christmas shopping haven't worked out very well. Right now, he's on the fourth floor in Toyland where he's just finished buying the presents for the baby. Ugh. My feet were certainly tired. I'll get on a ploy pretty soon. Relax for a while and get a haircut. Ugh, certainly haven't saved any money so far, except on the judge, him and his fat cousin in Wichita. Mr. Bentley, catch! Mr. Bentley! My goodness, haven't they found Bentley yet? Oh, I guess I'll... Oh, look at that cute little music box. Wonder what it plays. The big bad wolf. Isn't that cute? Certainly have wonderful things for kids nowadays. And look at those little mechanical toys. That's this. A little toy barber shaving a customer. I'll just wind it up. Look at that little razor go up and down. Reminds me of Floyd. Only 99 cents. Say, that wouldn't make a bad Christmas present for him. It's just 10, but I bet Floyd would get a kick out of it. He's not very sentimental about Christmas anyway. It's the thought that counts. And only 99 cents. Uh, clerk. Oh, clerk. In the market for a haircut? Yeah, went down to Hogan Brothers all day. Just thought I'd take a little breather. Okay, just take your coat off and hop right up here in the chair. All right, Floyd. Must've been doing some heavy shopping. See a lot of presents sticking out of your pockets. Yeah, and one of them is yours, Floyd. Oh, gee, thanks, Commish. That's swell of you. Don't mention it. Just tuck this under your chin. Funny how he makes so much fuss about Christmas every year, isn't it, Floyd? Well, I... Of course, it's great for the kitties, but it doesn't really mean much to us grown-ups. Well, I don't know, Commish. One holiday that really gets me. It does? You go along all year just taking your friends for granted, and Christmas comes, all of a sudden you realize what wonderful people they really are. Oh, yes. It does something to you right here inside. Well, you take a guy that's a cheapskate 11 months out of the year, Christmas comes, and he'll give you the shirt right off his back. Yes. Yes, you're right, Floyd. Of course, it isn't the present at Cal, but it's the spirit in which it's given. Well, I don't know. It seems to me what you give a fellow for Christmas shows what you really think of him. Well, not necessarily. Yeah, I think it does. I'll show you what I mean. I got a present from out of town today from a so-called friend of mine. He did? Yeah. And of all the cheap, trashy Christmas presents I ever got, this one takes the cake. What is it? I'll show you. I got it on the shelf here. Now, look at that piece of junk. A tin barber shaving a customer. He must think I'm a moron or something. Yeah, look at it. What's he expect me to do? Stand around and watch it all day? Well, I'm... Yeah, how do you like that? Busted already. The thing must have cost all of 98 cents. 99. What? I ask you, Commissioner, would you buy a thing like that for a friend? No, of course you wouldn't. By the way, Commissioner, if you want a light in your load day, you can drop off my present now. I think I'm going to have to exchange it, Floyd. I got the wrong color. I wonder where Bentley hides all day. I hope Floyd likes that sweater I got her. I've certainly done a fine job of saving on my Christmas presents. That line, you shopping too? Yes, I'm chubby, hubby to be. I'm fine. But I'm almost through. All I have to buy now is little ad lines present. Right over there in the jewelry department. Oh, I'm glad you haven't got my present yet. I wanted to talk to you about that. Oh, you did? I've got an idea. You know, darling, we're going to be married pretty soon. Uh-huh. And we ought to have some new furniture for the house. Oh? And I just saw the cutest living room set in the furniture department. Only $750. $750? Is that what you want for Christmas? Oh, of course not, silly. I'd like to have it someday when we can afford it. Oh. But I think we ought to start saving for it right now. And that's why I don't want you to buy me that wristwatch for Christmas. You don't? No, it's entirely too expensive. You just get me some little old doodad for about a dollar. But Adeline, you wanted that wristwatch so badly. Well, I just thought I did. I can get along with that. Gosh, I don't know. Well, now I insist. After all, we've got to be sensible, Throckmorton. And I believe a wife should help her husband every way she can. Gosh, Adeline, you're all wool in the yard wide. Besides, you'll be my Christmas present. You great big cuppy doll, you. Yeah. So you just run along now and get me some little token. And remember, nothing expensive. Well, all right, if you want it that way. Goodbye. Goodbye. See you tonight. Oh, Adeline's wonderful. Imagine her helping me to save money like that. She's right, I guess. It's the sensible thing to do. Let's see. I saw some inexpensive earrings at the jewelry counter the other day. Here we are. Let's see. Oh, hello, Mr. Gildersleeve. Hello there. Well, I suppose you've come for that watch you were looking at the other day. Well... I've got it laid aside right here. There you are. Mm-hmm. It's a beauty, all right. I'm sure it'll make your fiancee very happy. I'm sorry, but I've changed my mind. I'm not getting her the watch. Oh? I thought I might get her some earrings. Something about a dollar. Well, I might go as high as a dollar and a half. I see. Just a moment. I'll bring you the tray. The watch certainly looks beautiful, all right. Adeline did have her heart set on it. Well, we do have to be sensible. Here you are, sir. Thank you. Let's see. This pair looks rather nice. Green blutter flies with a big red stone in the middle. Mm-hmm. Don't you think so? Mr. Gildersleeve, may I say just a word? Hmm? Oh, sure. I know it's none of my business, but won't you please reconsider getting the wristwatch for your fiancee? What? Believe me, I just work here. I wouldn't make a cent more if you bought the watch. But I hate to think of your fiancee being disappointed at Christmas. But you don't understand. It was her idea. She wanted me to save money. She may have said that, Mr. Gildersleeve, but deep down I know she didn't mean it. What? I remember last year, my wife had her heart set on a gray coat with a little fur collar. She told me not to get it because we couldn't afford it. I let her think I wasn't going to buy it. And then Christmas Eve, I brought it home and surprised her. She was so happy, Mr. Gildersleeve, she broke down and cried. She did? Yes. Well, this is different, though. There's no use getting sentimental. Very well, sir. I just thought that since this was Christmas time... No, I'm going to be sensible about this. After all, Christmas is no different from any other time of the year. And I'm not going to... What's that? Employee's Christmas course is going to sing. Up there on the mezzanine. Well, that's all very nice, but I'd still like to pick out a pair of... Shh! If I can start. Hmm. Oh, let's still we see me lie Above nightingale and greenless sea The silent stars go by Yet in thy dark street shine The everlasting law Yes, Mr. Gildersleeve. Wrap up the wristwatch. Who wants to be sensible on Christmas? You had a chance to enjoy the full parquet flavor. That flavor that's so light and delicate on the tongue. The flavor that can, well, turn a plain piece of bread into an experience in real taste enjoyment. Parquet margarine is nourishing, too, of course, as nourishing is the most expensive spreads, even though it costs only about half as much. It's fortified with vitamin A to make sure you get even more of the nutritional essentials. But the flavor, that's the thing. Whether you prefer it on pancakes or waffles, biscuits or bread, parquet tastes so very good. Actually, like it should cost twice as much. Tomorrow, ask for parquet, P-A-R-K-A-Y, parquet margarine, made by Kraft. What a day. Well, anyway, I finished all my shopping. Gilding, gilding. Judge, you still here? I want to talk to you. All right, what is it, you old goat? Well, you looked awfully disappointed when I told you I was giving that blue dressing down to my cousins. So what? So I decided to give it to you. You have? Well, thank you, Horace. We're old friends, Gilding, and after all, you got me an expensive gift. I did? I mean, oh, yes. Well, thanks a lot, Judge. Excuse me, see you later. Well, here I go, back to the Thai department. Mr. Batman! Well, they finally found Bentley. Good night, folks. The Great Gilder Sleeve is played by Harold Perry, Adeline Fairchild by Miss Yuna Merkel. The show was written by Jean Stone and Jack Robinson with music by Jack Meakin. Included in the cast are Walter Tetley, Mary Lee Robb, Lillian Randolph, Earl Ross, and Richard LeGrand. This is John Wall saying good night for the Kraft Foods Company, makers of the famous line of Kraft quality food products. And be sure to listen in next Wednesday and every Wednesday for the further adventures of the Great Gilder Sleeve. Are you a cheese lover from a way back? If so, you'll be glad to know that now, Kraft is supplying your dealer with plenty of aged natural American, the old-fashioned kind that comes in big golden wheels. Aged natural American has been pretty scarce since before the war. People have been eating so much cheese that it's been difficult to set aside much for aging. But during the past year, Kraft has been sending fine shedders to the curing rooms, carefully aging them to bring out that deep down mellow goodness. Now your dealer has this grand cheese. Be sure to get a big golden wedge of it for the holidays. Ask for the natural American. Kraft has aged so carefully for you. This is it.