 Hey y'all she was seven I'm back Okay, so I was gonna show y'all something but I think I'm gonna say that for the next video, but Okay, so what I want to talk to you all about today is setting the tone Setting the tone for a relationship setting the tone for Dating and setting the tone for how your man is going to treat you. Okay, because as you know as people We are the ones that allow Other people to treat us a certain way. Okay, we are the ones that allow it because either a we don't do anything about it when it Happens and we don't say anything about it or we think we deserve it So in order to set the tone for a relationship or simply dating is When someone offends you or there's something that you don't agree with or like About something a person or a situation you have to immediately let them know you can't hold back because you think you're gonna scare them off because if you're trying to You know get to know this person and they're trying to get to know you they need to know You know the truth about what you like and what you don't like Because You know if you if you're a yes woman or yes man the whole entire way through the dating process And then you know y'all take it to the next level and get more serious And he starts doing all those things that you never liked in the first place He's gonna start getting on your nerves because you really don't like it But a lot of women feel that they have to put up with it or they're needy So they just deal with it, but if there's something that you don't like You need to say it straight up like as soon as possible Because that way they can correct the behavior if they really like you or you can not waste your time with this person and Be able to move on faster, you know and move on and do something else because a lot of times, you know Things fall apart when you when you have invested all this time and energy into something things fall apart because you've never discussed your true likes and dislikes you know You just you you were so worried about getting into the door. You didn't know that You know once you got in there, you wouldn't be happy. So you got to let them know up front, okay? If you don't if you don't agree with certain tactics and things that they do then a religion spirituality whatever you got to tell them straight up because That's what happens like right when y'all are getting in good then this religion thing comes up or this spirituality thing comes up or this bill paying thing comes up or you know this you know Woman versus man thing comes up and then you know you're comfortable with this person now so now you feel like you can voice your opinion and then y'all start fighting and arguing and Now you don't know what went wrong where it went wrong. It went wrong in the beginning because you didn't Be honest you weren't honest So that is why when you meet someone the first things y'all need to discuss is Those sort of big things that screw things up Okay, y'all need to get out all that out the way Okay, because When it comes down to it There are certain things such as you know spirituality religious Beliefs politics and all that kind of stuff that will ruin your marriage money Okay, if you go into a relationship Telling you're not even mentioning to your guy that you want to be a stay-at-home wife and you don't want to work And you're not contributing anything Financially to the family and you want him to do it all but you don't tell him that He's gonna feel tricked He's not gonna he's gonna resent you. He's gonna, you know be upset all the time You know things are gonna fall apart. So it's very important like when the man asks you well, what are you looking for? What do you want in a relationship? What do you want in a partner? That's when you tell him the truth you tell him every detail Because that is your opportunity and his opportunity to say yes or no Okay, and that's I'm telling y'all that's what I did when before I even got into a committed relationship With the man that I married I made sure he knew exactly how I wanted things to be and It was his choice to agree to it or not. I didn't trick anybody. Mm-hmm. I believe in tricking people because It is so much better When someone actually wants to do these things for you instead of feeling trapped or tricked, you know And it's all so much better when they know that you appreciate it and you wanted it and you asked for it and that This is what you were after anyway, and if it wasn't him it was gonna be someone else doing this for you, okay? Plus it makes them feel like you know They can Pleased you you know and a lot of men whether they know it or not they they live to please women They live to impress women they live to do this they live to do they live to look like something in front of a woman, okay? So Yes, be honest be very straight up and it will weed out all the guys who are not right for you Straight up it will weed them out you know a lot of women do dating sites and a lot of times they'll get into this conversation with the guy and go Back and forth for days and days and days before even asking. Well, what are you looking for? Are you looking for a long-term relationship casual dating? You know, we and ma'am. Thank you, ma'am And they'll be talking to some guy for five days and the guy just wants to hook up and Then in the woman thought that they were really getting to know someone for a future type relationship But then as soon as she mentions, oh, I'm looking for something long-term the guy is gone You know, he's like, okay. Well, I'm just trying to casually date so you got to get all those hard questions out in the beginning like straight up and It saves time It separates the man from the boys and also helps you to be more direct and Teaches you how to teach other people how to treat you when you do get on that date or in that relationship. So Your man will know, you know, oh She does not like this so I'm not even gonna go there. Oh, she told me she doesn't like that So I'm not even gonna go there. Oh, she I have to remember. She doesn't like it when I do this, you know They're gonna already know. So there's gonna be less drama less conflict like less compromise And the relationship, I mean less needing to compromise because straight up if they've agreed to enter into this Relationship and they've agreed to your standards and the things that you like and don't like then they're already on board You know someone will enter into a relationship without putting up any standards any rules any this or any that they're just Oh, I'm just gonna see what happens and then they're gonna get mad and have an attitude because they never told their man that they don't like This this and that, you know in the beginning. He's like, well, I didn't know, you know I'm used to doing and that could have been the deal breaker of the relationship, but she or he was not going to Openly come out and say what they really want in a relationship in fear of losing the other person So you can't be afraid so ladies if you fear loses somebody before you even get them then It's that's not a good thing. You need to be able to be straight up direct. Tell them what you want and Let them say yes or no Okay That's just it, you know, you got to be bold men respect bold and Honest women, they're not going to Neither they're gonna say yes, or they're gonna say no, it's not a rejection It's just can you meet these qualities in this standard? Yes or no, if you can't Okay, thanks for trying. See you see around, you know, it's not a rejection. It's just It's like a job interview, you know, can you meet this? Can you meet these job requirements? Yes or no if the man says oh, no, I can't do it Then he doesn't get the job. Okay, you got to treat me and like they're applying for a job and You know They are applying to be your man. You're not applying to be their woman. It's the it's a difference Even don't matter how much money they have. They are applying to be your man. Keep that in your mind Okay Because men live to impress women and if they if they can impress you by agreeing to your standards That makes them feel better about themselves, you know so remember When you are talking to me It is a job interview for them to be your man Okay, you telling what you like what you don't like ask them if they can meet those requirements if they say no But thank you for coming in. Have a good day We'll don't call us. We'll call you. Okay. That's what it is. You have to be like that because Men don't choose women women choose men. Okay. It's always been like that. We are the choosers It might not seem like that, but we are the choosers. We accept certain things But when it comes down to it, we are the ones that make the final decision if this is going to be a relationship Okay, so y'all have to keep that in mind And you know, eventually some guy is Some guy is gonna say yes, I can do that Yes, even though you're running the same line on everybody asking them the same question You're gonna get no, I can't do that. No, I can't do that. No, I can't do that. No, I can't do that No, I can't do that and then finally one day When you least expect it when you when you're expecting to hear no, I can't do that You're gonna hear yes, I can do that and you're gonna be in shock and you're gonna be like what? Really oh my goodness And you're gonna have it done. Okay, and I'm just saying that because it's true You know, it's it's so true ask all the women who are with someone who does the things for them That most women wish They find a man to do for them ask them how they got them and why This man does all this stuff for them because they asked straight up my cousin my cousin she put it On her personalized. She put out a personal ad and since I am looking for a very wealthy man to Take care of me She put her picture up her measurements and all that stuff and she says I Am looking for a wealthy man Hello, sorry, I thought my phone didn't ring but she's like, I'm looking for a wealthy man. Take care of me I don't I'm not gonna I don't want to work. She's like she put it all down And she said she had three dates Three guys call her and she went on three dates And one was just you know, she's he was crazy. She said no the second one she said I don't know something's wrong with him too, but the third guy was the one and she's still with him to this day and that was like six years ago and They live in a huge house He he takes care of her and her kids, you know, he's rich She doesn't have to work. She gets a monthly allowance of like two three thousand dollars She all her stuff is designer. She shops, you know Travels, I mean just very nice, you know and He paid for her to have You know, I don't know some type of plastic surgery. She had you know how people get when they get money. I think she had like a Breast lift, you know at college and injection Botox tell me took she had all that stuff done, right? And he paid for it and she still lives there and that's this huge house nice cars and She simply just put the ad out saying this is what I want. These are my standards. Can you do it? Yes or no, you know, and she let people come to her but that was before they had like that millionaire matchmaker and like before they had sugar daddy calm and Miriam millionaire or whatever now they have special websites dedicated to help women find, you know guys who can do things for them, you know and I don't think that's a bad thing I know a lot of people will say it's not about the money But you know it when you when you're dealing with broke man back to back to back in your life It is about the money because you can't be happy and you can't be in love if the lights are out Or you don't have any heat or food You can't be in love and you can't respect the man you're with if you can't get up and do something about it You can't you can't be in love with someone who? Makes you work 12 hours a day over time You know to struggle with each other you can't love somebody like that and respect them, you know, I couldn't I'm just saying it's Personally it's just me and I Just couldn't because I grew up seeing certain things. I grew up seeing my sister I grew up seeing other women that I knew only date with rich wealthy men who bought them cars Trap took them traveling bought them expensive clothes. They even bought me stuff What my husband? I mean my my sister's husband bought me a car. Okay? I this is what I grew up seeing so I can't go backwards in my style And I don't think women should have to to suffer and deal with broke men who can't get their stuff together I think there's plenty of men out there with money because I've seen everywhere And you just have to go to the right places and raise your standards, you know, there's plenty of them All right, so I will see y'all later And remember make people treat you the way you really want to be treated. Don't lie. Just be straight up and honest and that's how Easy it is. Okay. I'll see you later. Bye