 So let's talk about a very straightforward tool that everyone listening can use and I love this Michael. It's a technique that you can use to do a reality check on your uncertainty so that it doesn't hold you back and it's not overblown and that's what's really important. Yeah so what what we're using and this is something that I teach the guys that go through core confidence with me. This technique is called a courage card and it's designed to disarm the hot cold empathy gap. Now I'll tell you what the courage card is and then I'll explain the hot cold empathy gap. So the courage card is a small piece of paper or a note on your phone where you answer the following questions to a scenario where you find yourself in often and it's the question number one what's the worst that could happen be realistic and really be realistic right. Sometimes people say well the worst thing that could happen is that I get thrown out of my company and I get fired and I'll never get a job again and I'll sleep on the bridges. Yeah it's not really realistic like what's what's the realistic thing right. Question number two is on a scale from zero to ten how likely is this outcome going to be. Number three if this worst outcome actually happens will that still matter three months in the future. Number four how would it feel if you tried. No just try it's not saying anything just just try right how awesome would it feel if you tried. And number five how would you feel if you actually succeeded. So you write this down for the answers you write this down on a piece of paper for all those situations where you find yourself dealing with anxiety and uncertainty and then you keep them in your pocket and the next time you go into that situation and you're all stressed out you're all anxious you bring out this piece of paper and you read through it. Now here is where the hot cold empathy gap or cold hot empathy gap one of those two comes in because the the usual problem that we have is we can think rationally about things before we're in the situation but once we're in the situation like everything bubbles up we're just you know there's anxiety there's stress there's all this it's elevated heart rate which is freaking out and everything seems to go wrong. So this is why we write this courage card when it's when when we're cold when we can look at this rationally and then when it really gets crazy that's when we look at this it's like hey back then I wrote this a week ago yeah it was you know sane of mind it was very rational and this is what I what I came up with. So you know this is probably more the truth than what I'm feeling right now so I'm going to go with that. I love the courage card it's it's fantastic and it works I hope you work through all the things that you're feeling in a very based reasonable way and I want to add I want to add one question to it number six well freaking out help you in this moment go ahead go freak out how's that going to serve you in this moment I that's the one that I was always in the back of my head is like oh well okay you feel like freaking out okay will that help you in this moment go go for it right no that's working against us and and here's the thing when we actually sit there calmly coolly break down what's the worst that could happen what's the feeling I'll have if I tried what's the feeling I'll have if I succeed in this area well that rationalization happening before the fact oftentimes gets you to a place where you don't have to pull out the card you walk in with a feeling of security that I know that I've already game planned everything I've already worked through all the different outcomes and now I can take that step forward now this is all about commitment right this is about showing up and following through well one of the things you mentioned there that was very important we're not really in control of the outcome a lot of times it's not up to us however we are 100 we're in control of the effort we're 100 percent in control of that effort and so in order to feel good or create that destiny and the best of your ability that's going to be on you yeah and taking that step forward in these moments of uncertainty now obviously we talked about removing toxic relationships and when we remove relationships that does create a lot of uncertainty in our lives and it does create a lot of discomfort so thinking clearly about okay I've identified my friends who are toxic I've identified that these relationships are not serving me now with that courage card going through what's the worst that could happen if I lose this friend okay well I'm not gonna have that person to talk to okay well lunch is gonna suck at work they're not gonna be hanging out with me anymore okay on a scale of zero to ten how likely is it that you're not gonna have anyone to talk to you at work right oh well it's not pretty much out of ten right you start working through these things and all of a sudden you realize that man I'm not even close to being rational with these thoughts right I'm having all these emotional flare-ups that aren't even rational that aren't even tied to any reality and I think that's really the power of this courage card having that in your pocket having some faith that following through is where the magic happens allows us to deal with that uncertainty that's holding us back